Grateful for Saturday....

 Genesis 2:1-3 (NKJV):  "Thus the heavens and the earth, and all the host of them, were finished.  And on the seventh day God ended his work which He had done, and He rested on the seventh day from all His work that He had done.  Then God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because in it He rested from all His work which God had created and made."

In the Old Testament, the seventh day, or the Sabbath as they called it, was Saturday.  When Jesus rose on the third day after His crucifixion, it was Sunday, and that became our new Sabbath, our first day of the week.  Many people long for Saturdays to catch up on the things they didn't get done during the week.  But, in Biblical times, especially in the Old Testament, Saturdays were to be Holy days, they were not even to walk any long distances.  I don't remember exactly how far, but it seems like they couldn't walk more than two miles on a Saturday.  Can you imagine people with Fitbits back then watching every step so that they wouldn't walk further than two miles on that Sabbath day?  They weren't to work - and if they did, they could be stoned for breaking God's Word to rest!  Remember how angry the Jewish leaders got at Jesus when He healed on the Sabbath!  Oh my!

I do try to catch up on things on Saturdays that I didn't get completed during the week.  Mainly because of work, but also because after working, I'm tired.  Of course there isn't much that I do outside of work; my life is really kind of dull right now.  Other than this personal study and my own personal Bible reading, I'm not involved - and our preaching is not happening again until November.  I do need to get a message or two completed before then instead of waiting until a couple weeks before to start.  Of course I say that every year as well.  

But Sundays, I do try to leave those open for 'rest'.  For worshipping the Lord.  For being with family and/or friends.  For doing things I enjoy.  Hubby has said a few times something about doing laundry on a Sunday and I refuse to let him.  He's home all week; there is no reason it needs to be done on a Sunday.  If he can't get it done on his own during the week (because he doesn't feel like doing it), then I need to be given back the task and I will get it accomplished.  He only does laundry like every 10-12 days so it isn't like it's a major project.  He just makes it one.  There are only two of us. Sigh.    Of course, my cooking meals for us is not working. :-)

Today, Saturday, I will begin to put things in my suitcase for Jailbreak on Tuesday.  Not that I need to, but just things I want to be sure not to forget.  Like my hiking boots and my hat, just in case we get some hiking in.  After all, our airbnb is backed up to the forest so perhaps there are trails we can walk.  I want to get my first week finished in my study.  I started it yesterday for day 5, but I want to write out the scriptures and with work time, I had to stop and didn't get it finished.  I want to be able to reflect on the scriptures and not just read them.  How did you do with the questions yesterday?  Just curious.   I'm sure hubby will suggest we go to breakfast after we come out of our study, but I think I will put him off until mid-afternoon and do an early dinner at Olive Garden.  I still have a gift card we can use.  Which means I'll have to cook breakfast, more than likely, but I can fix scrambled eggs, toast, and oatmeal and that is a good and healthy meal to start the day with.  Especially cause I put nuts in the oatmeal, and honey to sweeten it with.  Hubby likes his raisins, but I like the sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, and walnuts.  

I was to go to Wickenburg and Tempe with my Needles of Hope group this morning, but I cancelled out the other day.  And I am still glad I did.  It would have been fun to go, for sure, but I am still coughing some and still am not 100%.  I don't really feel like listening to women chatter and I'm sure the car will be full!  Ever have one of those days where you really just prefer quiet versus chatter of people?  Besides, I love my time alone with God in the mornings and don't like to shorten it.  One good thing about our Jailbreak trip is that we rented the airbnb with 3 bedrooms so we each have our own room.  Which means I can get up early as usual and do my quiet time before the others get moving about.  I simply must have my time with Jesus each morning, or my day isn't complete.  When we go to Indiana it is usually harder as we are guests of family and our early time of 4AM is usually 7AM their time so they are up.  I just can't make myself get up any earlier.... so have to switch to evening, and then it throws me off and sometimes I forget until already in bed!  But God still loves me and understands. 

Oh - the June 3 issue on the meeting I worked on and stressed over last week?  Imagine my frustration yesterday morning when I brought up the President's calendar and clicked on the 6 hour meeting that kept us from doing this meeting on May 20th.... and found his executive assistant had dragged an EMAIL into the 6 hour time slot..... and that the actual meeting it was about had been scheduled on May 13th!  Which means, his calendar IS open.  Now that was at 8:30AM yesterday.  I immediately sent an email to EA to please double check that calendar (this is the third time I have asked her to confirm he could not do May 20th).... and as of 5PM last night, she had not responded to my request.  I shared that info with my boss.... so once I get the confirmation we can use May 20th, I will have to send an apologetic letter to everyone and tell them 'sorry for the inconvenience, but conflicts have been removed and we can use the May 20th date that everyone had already blocked their calendar for - and I hope it was still available'.  This is one of the reasons I go crazy some days.  I can't do anything until his EA removes the block and confirms we can have May 20th.  Her boss is critical for the meeting.  UGH.

Romans 8:28 (NKJV)  "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose."

This scripture just came to mind as I was relating the story of this meeting.  You want to know how God has already brought good from this issue?  As I shared earlier in this blog, hubby had stopped by my door as I was dealing with my frustration and I commented about retirement.  For the first time ever, hubby actually LISTENED to me and my comments about retirement.  He asked if I thought we could really manage on two social security checks.  It will affect me more than it will him - he lets me keep my check currently as he doesn't need it to pay bills.  I buy groceries, all gifts, my own medical expenses, my own car expenses and I save as well.   If I don't have a check coming in, I will have to relinquish that check to him to pay the bills with.  Therefore, I have no problem with finding a part-time job so that I can have spending money.  Work a few days a week and play the others.  Yeah, I could do that.  But what I am saying is that perhaps this issue needed to happen so that hubby would listen to me, and will seriously think about letting me quit working.  I may still wait until 2025... but it needs to be my choice, and not because I am forcing the issue.  Yes, with my check we can do a lot of things now we never have been able to do before because we dropped our expenses when we sold our other house.  And it will be a drastic change for both of us.  But I'm willing to make it work.  I just need to wait for God's timing, and not mine.

Sometimes we need to just take our hands off our desires and let God bring things about in His timing.  The waiting isn't always easy, but God always provides just what we need when we need it.

Blessings!

Best thus far!

 I slept once again in this bedroom and although I was awake a few times during the night, I am feeling much, much better today.  Thank you for your prayers.  I still have a bit of a ways to go, and yet, I feel rested - more so than I have in a long, long time.  Of course part of that may be due to all I've done is sleep since Saturday.  Well, I did have to work, bur two-three times (other than Wednesday when I was so busy) a day I was laying down (I did have permission from my boss!) to rest.  Sometimes you have to do that in order to get over whatever it is.

But last night another thought occurred to me.  I'm wondering if my gallbladder is started to act up in another way - rather than the nausea and pain I have felt in the past.  I'm not sure.  Or, it could be that I just have had no appetite (which could be a good thing) since the weekend.  I ate a snack bar for breakfast yesterday because I knew I needed to eat something.  At lunchtime, hubby asked to take me to lunch, and although I wasn't hungry, I agreed to go.  I got a cup of soup and a sandwich.  I was really looking forward to french fries, which I thought was included - even potato chips- with the sandwich.  It wasn't.  I was disappointed.  Hubby offered to order me a side of french fries but I declined.  Ate the soup, but the sandwich I couldn't finish, so hubby did.   Late afternoon my daughter called and asked if she could bring me some soup and a sandwich for hubby for dinner, so that I wouldn't have to cook.  What a blessing, cause I wasn't feeling too good last night.  She told me where she would get it from, and I told her what to get.  She dropped it off and headed on her way.  It felt odd for someone to do that for us; I'm usually the one doing, I think.  But it was very nice to be remembered.  

Work kept me busy yesterday and to end my day, sigh, the boss who had me making this huge meeting with about 16 people (with 8 being outside the company) in Colorado on Wednesday and it was such a difficult thing to accomplish, but we got it set for June 3.......  he tells me last night that I need to send an email out to see if it would be possible to move it to May 31.  I reminded him it was the day after Memorial Day.  Well, I told him I wasn't going to do it last night; I wasn't feeling well still and I just didn't want to deal with it.  He had me schedule for June 3rd and now that people are saying other things have come up - he wants me to change it.  So what did I do as well?

When hubby stopped by the door, I commented to him that now would be a good time to retire.  I'm tired; some meetings are stressful; and I'm actually afraid that I won't be able to have any enjoyment in retirement... after all, I could die before I retire or I could die right after I retire.  I really do not want to work all my life and then die and not enjoy the things I enjoy doing.  Course I have always said the year I had of not work (but still drawing a paycheck) November 2011 - November 2012 was my retirement.  But then, I was enjoying working.  Now, I'm just tired.  I guess I remember an uncle who worked all his life and one week after he retired, he died of a heart attack while mowing his front yard.  Of course you won't find me doing any hard labor, but still.    Hubby asked if I really thought we could afford to live on two social security checks - and I told him it would be tough, but we could.  Plus, I could get a part time job to have for spending money (i.e., Christmas, birthdays, etc).  I asked him to sit down and list every bill we have that we pays monthly.  Then we need to list those things that hit occasionally, i.e., dentist and doctors that we have to pay, etc.  Then let's talk.  He mentioned that I had 'set' the date... January 10, 2025... but I reminded him that it was also almost 3 years away.  And I'm tired.  At 75, how many years do I have left?   I don't know that I would retire anytime soon - I'd wait until January, anyway, if I did.  I can get Medicare for my medical expenses and they pay more than my current medical insurance does.  Once I'm back up to par, I may totally change my mind.  I definitely do not want to retire and sit at home all day!  I refuse to spend my day on a computer .... unless I begin my dream of writing a book, anyway.   At least this time he didn't walk away from my comment, but did engage in conversation.

I am loving my new Bible study.  I've done it several times before, but this is the first time in the updated version and it feels totally new.  I don't have time to finish today's session, so will work on it over the weekend.  It's 5 days a week and then has an extra 'day' to answer questions in a group study.  I plan to do those too, cause my sister and I are doing this together and we will discuss it on Sunday.  It really causes one to think.  How would you answer these three questions?

1)  was there a time in my life when I genuinely repented of (was aware of and turned away from) my sin?

2) Was there a time when I placed all my trust in Jesus Christ alone to save me?

3) Was there ever a time when I completely surrendered to Jesus Christ as the Master and Lord of my life?

2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV):  "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have been passed away; behold, all things have become new."

When we confess our sins to Jesus, they are erased and our slate is clean.  Not that we won't suffer any consequences of the things we have done that we shouldn't have, but the sin of what we have done is wiped clean.  It's good to start the day off with a clean slate, don't you agree?  Think about saying this to the Lord each morning...

Psalm 51:10 (NKJV):  "Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

Blessings!

Who was burning pizza at 3:40AM?

 Hubby had me sleep in here last night with the hopes that I could get a good sleep.  And I think I did fairly well, although I was awake frequently with coughing, and one time up-chucking symptoms.  I'm exhausted still this morning and I WILL be taking naps throughout the day if I can manage it.  I am afraid that this 'cough' that is turning into a cold really fast, may really be pneumonia from smelling all the chemicals in the disinfectants.  I did write the hotel yesterday.  I did tell them I wasn't casting blame.  The cleaning people did what they were instructed to do.  I requested they check with the cleaning people to make sure they are breathing ok as they breathe this stuff all day long with their cleaning of all the rooms.  We had opened our balcony door several times to air out the room, so I had hoped we had bypassed this part, but explained both hubby and I were experiencing reactions from staying at their hotel.  Will see if I hear anything as I put it in the survey they sent out.  I'll give it a week.  If I don't get any response, I will write a letter directed at the office.  They really need to be careful with whatever they are using to clean with.  There are people who will file a lawsuit.   I'm taking my olive leaf extract and black elderberry syrup and that has helped me, but found out this morning that hubby has not been taking it, so I told him to start.

And just to make sure that I didn't have COVID, I did take the test.  If you have taken the test before, you can imagine my confusion for a bit.  I followed instructions on how to do it - but I didn't read the instructions on how to read it.  That caused me a bit of angst.  Until I read them.  I watched the line come alive and bright red under the 'c' and the 't' was blank.  What in the world do those even mean?  To me, 'c' meant a positive COVID test.  I haven't been anywhere other than the grocery up there to be exposed so was trying to figure it out.  Finally, I picked up the paper and was reading it.... with just the 'c', it meant a negative test.  It helps to read everything and not to assume.  I wonder what the 't' means.  I quit reading after finding my test my negative.  Doesn't make me feel better, and yet, it does.  Will be drinking green tea and hot water with lemon and honey today to break this congestion in my chest.  

I did cancel my going on the NoH Road Trip this Saturday.  Even if just a 'cold', I don't want to cause anyone to get sick so thought it best I step out this time.  I really do want to go on Jailbreak next week, but if I'm still coughing a lot, I may have to reconsider.  Sounds also like a trip to the drug store to get cough drops, and maybe even cough syrup.  I'm not feeling 'bad' except for the constant coughing and runny nose.  And the occasional up-chuck of mucus build-up.  yeck.

Oh - what about the title?  I was in a sound sleep this morning when at 3:40AM I smelled pizza burning.  It caught my attention because I had fixed pizza for us last night's dinner.  I wasn't feeling 'up' to cooking, although I was getting ready to pull vegetables out of the freezer to prepare.  Hubby came and said 'if you don't feel like cooking, do you want me to pick up something'?  Isn't that sweet.  He truly has been really attentive lately and honestly, it has really helped our relationship.  Not that I'm getting attention, but that he LISTENS to me (and I him), and give each other our undivided attention.  I couldn't believe when we returned on Sunday that he came to me and said "Thank you for the nice weekend.  I know you were sick, but it was the best weekend, because we were together".  Or something like that.  I tried to apologize for the weekend and he wouldn't let me.  Does that guy love me or what?!

The pizza.  I mentally reviewed last night when I cooked the pizza.  I remember distinctly turning off the oven (and we definitely did not leave pizza in the oven) so I knew we were 'safe'.  So I just whispered a prayer that whoever had pizza in the oven that it would alert them before something bad happens - like their house burns down.  Isn't that weird to wake up to?  An odor of pizza burning?

I'm still praying for our healing, and ask that you offer prayers as well.  I've heard of chemicals in cleaning products can cause pneumonia if breathed in too long - and we were there Friday afternoon until Sunday morning with leaving the room only a few times.  I remember my older sister years ago washed her tub and toilet with bleach - and within a few days was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia.  That's what has come to my mind.  I want to avoid that part.

Hosea 10:12:  "Heal me O Lord and I shall be healed; save me and I shall be saved, for You are the One I praise."

I remember coming across that verse in my daily reading several months ago.  And it spoke to me and has become so precious to me.  I've had a lot of heartache in my life.  No one knows everything, nor will I ever share it all.  But I was going through some really hurting stuff internally, and when I read that verse, I 'owned' it.  And as I prayed, I told Jesus all about my pain, my broken heart, the mistakes I've made, the things done to me.  And I felt His Peace.  I felt His Love.  And I am pleading with the Lord to hear His Word spoken back to Him, that He would heal me, that I shall be healed of this infliction.  I am saved, for I have accepted Him as Lord of my life.  Doesn't mean I don't still make mistakes, but I personally know who the Forgiving One is, and I can run to Him for His Grace, that He freely gives.  I am still learning this 'walk with Jesus' life.   I know I'll continue to make mistakes.  People I have looked up to have failed, just as I have failed.  I love our former pastor from many years ago.  He taught me so much about being a servant for Jesus.  I love nothing more than sitting at Jesus' feet and learning from Him.   In a Mary and Martha world, I want to be Mary.   The key is to be a quick confessor, a quick forgiver.  God will take care of the rest.

Where are you at today?  Do people come to your mind that you think are going to have no problem going to heaven?  Are you sure?  We sometimes easily say our path is a rocky one, but so is theirs.  We are to be like Jesus in all respects.  Love.  Forgive.  Offer Grace.

Blessings!

still struggling, somewhat better....

 First, because I want to share how God is healing me, it's all about me.  The sneezing has stopped.  The headache is still gone.  The sore throat is gone.  But, alas, the runny nose and coughing are still here.  In fact, both kept me awake most of the night.  I got up around 3:30AM and came in here to my chair and tried to sleep some more.  Still not feeling physically up to par.  I've heard hubby coughing some too - he was in the room breathing all the disinfectants as well, but it doesn't seem to have affected him as bad as me.  I still don't understand how it has affected me so badly - we tried to air out the room, but I think we became used to the odor and stayed in the room from about noon on Saturday until we left on Sunday - me sleeping; hubby just being quiet (and sleeping some) so that I could rest.  With not sleeping well last night I may be taking a nap or two.  I didn't take naps yesterday and my mind would not shut off last night - I was wide awake for the majority of the night.

I am signed up to go on a 'road trip' with some girl friends to a yarn shop in Wickenberg and Tempe on Saturday - with lunch in between.  I'm debating on whether or not to go.  Part of me wants to go so that I can be out with other women, but part of me feels guilty about leaving hubby home alone for the entire day when I will be gone 4 days next week.  He still wants me to go.  I'm still praying and thinking about it.  With my continued coughing, I may make others uncomfortable.  Since we do have COVID tests here at home, I may just take one to be sure it is the disinfectants that I have breathe in and not the virus itself.  It should come back negative, and then I'd feel better and can tell them I took the test, just to be sure, for their sake.

Hosea 10:12 (NKJV) "Sow for yourselves righteousness; Reap in mercy; Break up your fallow ground, For it is time to seek the Lord, till he comes and rains righteousness on you."

That is the scripture I am to remember as I begin this new study on 'Seeking Him'.   I actually remember it from when I did this study before.  A lot has changed in this study and thus far it is going well.  I like that it is a daily thing and only takes 5-10 minutes to read and complete what is there.  Just enough to cause the mind to ponder some things.  I need to stay involved in these studies for it keeps my mind active - not that work doesn't - but this is something that I enjoy, and trust me, I need this more than I need my job!

What does 'break up your fallow ground' mean?  It means to break up the hardness of your heart, seek the Lord and His righteousness, and He will rain His righteousness upon you.  The 'break up your fallow ground' really spoke to me the first time I did this study.  I remember researching it all to understand what does that really mean.  Of course the other versions of the Bible say it a different way, but I love the way the NKJV says it.  Break up the hardness of your heart, turn to Jesus, and He will bless you in ways you cannot imagine.  How awesome is that!

UGH.  My Fosamax, my daily pills, and my coffee are not mixing well this morning on my empty stomach - which is really nothing unusual as I always take my pills on an empty stomach.  I waited the half hour after the Fosamax as I should, stayed upright as I should, but now my tummy is giving me the queasy feeling.  Hmmm.  Hope I don't have to make a run for it.

I think I will leave you with this today.... taken from my daily cards....

2 Timothy 4:22:  "The Lord be with your spirit.  Grace be with you."  How I love being a recipient of God's Grace.  He has been so good to me, so faithful, throughout my life.  Yes, I had to endure some things, but He has never left me, even when I didn't know Him, even when I rejected Him to follow my own path.  He has been my Sustainer, my Protector, my Hope, my Redeemer, my Friend.  And most of all, my favorite for Him - my Nail in a Sure Place.  His grace has given me a new life every day.  Until you recognize His grace in Your life, which is NOT getting what you deserve, you can never be truly grateful.

Ever watch The War Room?  You should, and by the end, you will understand what grace is.  I cry every time I watch it.  Why?  Because I know what God's grace has done for me in my life.  I am here today only becasue of God's grace towards me.  And I can contribute that to the prayers of my mother and my real father, my grandparents, who I know prayed for me, even before I was born.  God's Redeeming Grace.  There is nothing like it, and until you look back over your life and see the times He has rescued you, the times His hand has been upon you, and recognize His grace for you, you will never find the joy you can have in knowing Him.

Life is beautiful!  Enjoy every minute of today!  His Grace will always sustain you.

Blessings!

Better, but not best...

Even with working yesterday, and frequently laying down on the bed for a nap, when I stopped working and I sat on the couch to watch the news that hubby had turned on the TV,  I settled back in my seat - and the next thing I knew - when I opened my eyes - hubby told me I had been asleep for another 45 minutes!  Headache finally went away yesterday (but has found its way back with a vengence this morning!) and the sneezing dropped considerably.  This morning, other than my head pounding (too much sleep?) this 'thing' seems to be settling in my throat (it's sore) and chest (chest cold?).  I did get up about midnight once again to upchuck - but other than that, I'm in great shape!  I am coughing now, and that hurts the throat.  I'm hoping the headache will go away once I get some caffeine in me.  I've already taken a double strength tylenol to help with the headache.  I've got to start feeling better!  I realized yesterday that next Tuesday I go on our Jailbreak Getaway!  With feeling crummy, I can't even get excited.  If I don't get over this, I may end up not going at all.  I will insist the others still go, even if I'm too sick to.  I don't want to take a chance on getting any one else sick so I have one week to get over this. And I should.   I ought to jump on the scale... I haven't eaten much of anything so surely I have lost some weight!  

And with the realization that Jailbreak is next Tuesday (have to work Monday as I have to approve the timecards for payroll), I have other things that I must get done before I go.  One good thing is that my one boss is going on PTO this Wednesday and she won't be back until May 4th.  No work from her, but will have stuff from the other, I'm sure.  Working on a big Colorado meeting for him right now.  I must get it completed this week, that's the biggie.  I have other things to do as well, just didn't feel I could think them through yesterday- so took a nap instead.  I can't believe how much I am sleeping - deep sleep at that - but I know that sleep is best for me rather than trying to push through.  I told my boss yesterday that I wasn't feeling well but was going to try and work.  She gave me permission to lay down whenever I felt I needed to.  And I did.  I'm hoping to get past that today, but if not, my bed is ready and waiting for me in here.  The advantage of the office being in this bedroom.

I awoke at 3:30AM this morning and told myself I had a half hour yet before the fitbit alarm went off.  Well, I slept through the 4AM, 4:30AM buzz... but finally woke to the 5AM buzz.  Why am I needing all this sleep?  I was surprised I slept much last night as I slept much during the day - but was in bed around 8PM as usual.  Obviously my body needs rest to heal.  I am reminded that animals, when they are sick, know to lay down and rest so that their body can heal.  We humans aren't always that smart; we try to keep working and doing things and it delays us getting better.  I'm sure I have gotten plenty of rest so I must be on the mend, right?!

Thank you Tylenol and coffee!  My headache is finally fading!   My sneezing has stopped, and other than coughing and a sore throat; congestion in the chest some, I think I'm on the mend. Thank You, Jesus.  I appreciate any prayers offered on my behalf, and ask they continue so that I can get totally over this.  Yes, I am rambling this morning... 

Today, as I look as my prayer topic, it is for 'Pure Vision'.  That doesn't just mean for eyes to see, but for the eyes of the mind to see clearly that one's life is a testimony to others of the goodness of God.  How we live is our legacy we pass on to our children.  I learned about leaving a legacy to our children, grandchildren, several years ago in a confernce.  It really made an impact on me.  At that time I only had three or four grandchildren, but I loved them dearly (and I still do!) as I do all the others.  But leaving them a legacy of good memories of my life means a lot to me.  I'm not perfect by any means.  I've made a lot of mistakes.  But I love my children and my grandchildren (and now the greats!) with a love that only one with the same can have.  How I wish I could have more time with them!  

I'm so grateful one granddaughter will make the journey with her daughter around Christmas so that we can make memories of baking cookies.  Even though we did them after Christmas this year - which was good in that all the hustle and bustle of Christmas was over - it is a treasured memory in my heart.  And my grandsons will still come over to bake cookies.  Distance prevents some, I get that.  But I miss having my grandchildren around so that we can make memories.  I wish I had made some of these memories with my own children.  I am hoping that my children will form these memories with their own grandchildren.  Only then will they understand the love between them.  It's their legacy, their testimony, they pass on.

God has blessed me immensely with all my children and grandchildren - and great grandchildren!  And I am grateful.  What is it the Bible says about children?  They are the arrows in our quiver?  Hmmm, may have to see if I can find that scripture.  Ah... I found something...

Psalm 127:4 (NKJV):  "Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth."

Psalm 127:4 (MSG):  "Don't you see that children are God's best gift?  the fruit of the womb his greatest legacy?  Like a warrior's fistful of arrows are the children of a vigorous youth.  O how blessed are you parents, with your quivers full of children!  Your enemies don't stand a chance against you; you'll sweep them right off your doorstep."

I kind of like the MSG one, don't you?  

Hoping to make a trip south in either May or June to visit a granddaughter and take a great-granddaughter her birthday gifts.  Need to pay for this last trip north first and then get past Jailbreak, get past hubby's next aneurysm surgery on May 16th (yes, it finally got scheduled), and then I can focus on other things.  August will be our anniversary getaway to the mountains of Star Valley to an Airbnb we have rented for a week.  That's already paid for so all we have to do is pack and drive there.  

And, I think I'm done for today.  Need to work on my new study I'm doing with my little sister.  Today is day two, since I didn't do it yesterday.  It's a great study for personal revival.  The Lord knows I need to get myself re-ignited again.  Life sometimes beats one up so badly that we lose our fire.  I want the Revival Fire back.

Have an awesome day!

Blessings!

The weekend HAD started out fairly good...

 but by Saturday evening I was absolutely miserable.  Head pounding, sneezing 3-6 times in a row!, and blowing my nose, watering eyes.  All I can think this is from is that the wind was blowing hard and we were outside some on Friday, and again on Saturday morning (had to go to Hobby Lobby).  I think I mentioned in an earlier post that there was the smell of smoke in the air in certain areas.  Between breathing that - and when we got our hotel room, they had just disinfected it - andthe smell was so strong I had to open the balcony doors to air out the room.  Breathing that as well, I'm thinking that has brought on what I am dealing with.  

I didn't sleep well at all on Saturday evening and ended up on the couch at midnight, hoping that hubby could at least get some sleep without my tossing and turning.  I was constantly sneezing into the covers, trying to be quiet.  And my head was pounding in the sinus area.  Sunday morning hubby went down and purchased some Benadryl, Advil for Sinus, and Double strength Tylenol.  I took some Benadryl and that seemed to help some.... but then I couldn't stay awake and slept most of the morning; didn't even get my quiet time done (hence, no blog written).  I slept until about 10AM and we packed up to head back home.

I will admit that hubby has been very attentive and very nice, considering we ended up staying in the room nearly all weekend,.  My head was pounding so bad I couldn't even sit up, let alone go anywhere.  It was good to get home and we both took naps.  I took one for about an hour and a half!  I am sure it was the Benadryl causing me to be so sleepy.  As the evening went on my head continued to pound and the sneezing continued.   By 8PM I had added allegra to everything I had already taken.... and by 9PM I was up-chucking everything.  I hadn't eaten since breakfast yesterday morning and I had no appetite... taking all these meds and drinking a lot of water - of which I didn't do while we were gone - empty stomach, several different meds... yeah... I threw it all up - didn't take any more, and I did sleep somewhat better, especially since I was in my own bed, with my own pillow.  I awoke with Jeremiah 17:14 on my mind this morning.  

Jeremiah 17:14 (NKJV):  "Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed;  Save me, and I shall be saved, for you are my praise."

And this morning I am still feeling pretty rough.  Still have the headache, although at this moment it feels like it has lessened.  My throat is scratchy and felt swollen earlier but seems better now.  My left eye keeps watering still, and I'm still dealing with a runny nose.  I plant o work today, but if I don't start feeling better, I may just revert to checking messages this afternoon and sleep.  Which, I feel, is the best thing when a body is out of whack.  I still feel all of this came on me from being out in the wind/smoke and the disinfectants in the room.  I apologized to hubby for ruining his weekend away, but he said it wasn't ruined - we got out of the house, and he knew my heart was in the right place; my body just couldn't handle all the odors.  

I did my Bible reading this morning but that's it.  And I'm thinking now I will turn this off and my light as well, and try to rest a bit more.   If I can get rid of this headsche, it would make my day go better, for sure.  I still haven't eaten since breakfast yesterday morning, so as I try to sip my coffee (REAL coffee) tis morning, my stomach isn't liking it real well.  Once I get moving this morning, I can fix something to eat and heat my coffee up and hopefully enjoy it then.

Sorry I don't have much for you this morning.... please pray for my healing; I can't remember when I felt this bad.  If I get real lucky, I'll lose a pound or two - right?  But it was good to get away for the weekend; I just wish I hadn't gotten so sick.  I have heard hubby coughing some this morning; wonder if I've caught a cold and passed it on to him... 

Enjoy your day.  I'm going to try to get 15 minutes of total quiet in before having to get on the work computer.

Blessings!

It's good to get away....

 Yesterday, hubby's birthday, started and ended well, I think.  We stopped at - gasp! - McDonald's - for breakfast before heading over to the nail place.  We both got pedicures, manicures, and our brows waxed. Yeah, he enjoys the pampering as well.  No polish for him, but I did get polish on my nails.  After that we came home and finished packing our suitcases, loaded the car, and headed north.  As we were coming into town, we could see the haze from the Crook Fire and the Tunnel Fire that is going on.  Smell it too - really bad in some areas.  Where the hotel is, we don't smell it, but I understand we are on the cusp of the fire.   Praying for safety for the firemen and God's favor of rain upon that area.  It did rain a few sprinkles on us as we went out to the car to get our suitcases out.

We arrived at the hotel about 2:15PM and our room was not ready.  By 3PM it was - and I'm so glad I chose to upgrade to the executive suite!  There is a partial wall separating the bed from the rest of the room.  We even have a fireplace in the bedroom!  We have a table and four chairs on the other side of the wall, then a leather couch and chiar, a coffee table, a desk/chair, a dresser and TV.  And I love we have a balcony and hope to utilize it some today.  We love going out on the balcony and drinking a good cup of coffee in the mornings.  Haven't gotten that good cup of coffee yet.  The coffee they leave in the room is nothing more than hot water with a 'touch of coffee'.  I went ahead and drank mine; hubby couldn't.  Still another half hour or so before breakfast will be ready downstairs and we can get some decent coffee.  I - on a whim (as if we NEED them), bought two 'hot' cups from Starbucks cause my plan is to use them for coffee this morning when we go downstairs and can bring it back up with us.  It's twice thesize of the cups they give us to use.  I need my coffee... think that is why my sinus' is all over the place this morning - sneezing and blowing my nose - coffee generally wakes it up and puts it back to normal. LOL  It's probably being out in the wind some yesterday as it is blowing pretty good up here.

Didn't sleep too well last night - bed was ok, but I didn't like the pillow.  The longer you lay on it, the flatter it gets so I was flipping it last night every time I woke up - which is another reason for the headache and sinus stuff going on.  Plus I was warm... I brought my 'winter' jammies cause hubby kept telling me it was to be cold up here.  Like I would be going outside much.  I do have sweatshirt and pants to wear today.  Will get him to turn the thermostat down tonight  Lots of covers on that bed.  But it is a very nice roomy moom and I'm glad we got it.

Starting my new Bible study tomorrow - may even start reading it today.  My little sister is supposed to do it with me .... I can't always depend on her... but I want to do this study over.  It was in 2013 when I completed it - and taught it - the first time.  This has been updated so hope I can get a lot out of it.  We all need to be learning every day.  (but when it's work, I don't always want to).

For the first time in all the years we have come to this hotel, they finally have a restaurant of sorts here.  It's called "Coopers Pub" and I tell you what - they have great tenderloin sandwiches - and Tom enjoyed his cheeseburger last night.  Fried green beans too!  We didn't want to go out (and I want to keep hubby from driving at night in an area we aren't familiar with) so ate 'in'.  Food was really good.  They told us they are having live music tonight from 8-12PM I think it was... but we are usually in bed by 8:30PM so probably will not go.  And that's ok.  Or we may go down for 1/2 hour or so just to listen - it is supposed to be 'country folk music' - not sure what that means.  I'm hoping it is 'just country'.  If nothing else, we get free popcorn!  (hubby didn't eat any though!)

Nothing much planned for today; going to get dressed and head downstairs for breakfast.  Then back up here to probably read for awhile.  Perhaps we will locate a bookstore and go browse.  That is always fun for me.  May go walk Hobby Lobby.  May go walk the mall.  Nothing on the agenda and nothing planned. 

For now, I'm going to change to clothes from my jammies and get some real coffee.  Hope you have a great day!

Blessings!

All but one task....completed!

 Yesterday was a very busy day and I had much to get done - many things I mentioned yesterday, and tag onto that meetings that came through that I also had to create.  One big plus with the majority of these meetings, with using Teams now, and the majority of people are remote, I don't have to find conference rooms for meetings.  For that I'm grateful for that was often a chore when we were in the office.  I was able to get all the meetings created, all the desktops completed, all the things that I knew I had to complete yesterday with taking off work today - done.  All but one.  The Colorado trip.  I finally heard back from the President's executive assistant as to what days he could be there.  Compared it to my 'Chief's' calendar and then checked with him and asked his advice on what to do to bring the 15 or so people together - in Colorado - to get this completed.  I have a meeting scheduled on Monday with all the executive assistants and admins to review their bosses' calendars and come up with a date and time to meet.  I knew I couldn't do it yesterday with everything else (nor did I want to) so have scheduled it late Monday morning.  I wanted nothing to be on my mind this weekend.  So everything was completed but that trip.  Thank you, Jesus!

Last night we went to one of the high schools to watch a musical production of Beauty and the Beast, which was put on by AZ Christian University students.  I thoroughly enjoyed it all.  Sure, there were a few challenges for them, but overall, the performance -  about 2 1/2 hours long (with a 15 minute intermission) was wonderful.  Sigh.  I was really enjoying seeing ALL the stage until a young couple comes in after the performance started and he sits down right in front of me.  This guy - no kidding - was close to 7 ft tall - with wild fly away hair.  When he snuggled with his girlfriend, things were fine.  But then he got antsy and started squirming - first one side, then the other, and seemed to block my view several times.  But, I got past it and just moved to where I could see a bit better.  I did miss some, but overall, since I know the movie, I knew what was happening.  I'm so glad I saw Pastor Gerald's post and bought the tickets.  AND, we got to see Pastor Gerald too!  He came up and chatted with us for about 15 minutes and I felt so blessed because he took the time to chat with us.  He is in charge of the entire music program at the University, and therefore, was overseeing the drama program as well.  It was so good to see him.  That made my evening too.

Coming home we both were a bit hungry and - lol - we don't 'do' McDonalds as a rule.... and every time we drove by one hubby would go, "McDonald's is closed" - when I could see cars lined up in the drive through.  I knew where Whataburger was so after he told me it was closed and I told him no, the drivethrough was still open, he pulled in.  10PM at night and I'm eating Whataburger.  And it was good.  We sat up for awhile before heading to bed, hoping we'd sleep a little later.  But we didn't.  I was dozing between 4-5AM but finally got up.  But I certainly didn't want to!

This morning we have much to accomplish.  It is hubby's 85th birthday so we will head to get manicure/pedicure (yes, him too - he loves it!) around 8:45AM and from there will probably grab an early lunch.  Then home to pack our bags and start the trip north.  No big rush; we supposedly can't get our room until 3PM but usually do get it before then.  But we can take our time.  Not packing a lot, obviously, as we are only staying two nights and one full day.  By Sunday afternoon we will be back home.  Once we get in town tonight we will pick up snacks to have in our room and decide what we want to do about dinner.  Since it IS his birthday, I suppose I need to take him to dinner.  But, if I'm buying lunch, do I need to buy that too?  LOL  Him and his food!

As we have aged, the reality of life does tend to come to the top of the mind.  We need to celebrate each and every day, but especially the day we were born because we don't know if we will be here for the next one or not.  So I'm hoping that today, and this weekend, we can create special memories that will last a lifetime.  For hubby and for me.

Psalm 39:4 (NLT)  "Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be.  Remind me that my days are numbered--how fleeting my life is."

Psalm 139:16 (NLT)  "You saw me before I was born.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day was passed."

One thing for sure, God created each day to be lived to the fullest.  I'm not sure what we will do while we are up north.  We plan to read more, I'm taking my crochet as well.  But hubby reads while here so he won't think it is any different than usual.  It's me that can consider it a 'vacation'.  He's always on vacation.  So although we will be eating out a lot more than usual, I want to DO something.  Maybe I can get hubby to walk the mall.  :-)  That is different, right?

Why not take some time right now and think about what you can do differently that will make special memories for someone you love?  Don't let a day go by with regrets.  You won't have a chance for a do-over.  Each day has 'worry of its own'.  Celebrate today.  Celebrate tomorrow.  And the next day.  Each day is a gift that God has given us.  Make them count.

Blessings!

Priorities is the topic for today

Priorities.  We all have them.  Some we keep as a priority and others we tend to find things to take their place.  My first priority each and every morning is taking time to spend it with God.  I read a chapter or two of His Word, I spend time in prayer, I type in here, and if I have time left, sometimes I can read a few pages in a book or work on a study.  That is basically my routine each morning and getting up at 4AM to ensure I have time for God first is my biggest priority.

What about you?  What is your priority - other than the bathroom - each morning?  Do you stumble into the kitchen to have a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal?  Do you read the morning news on the computer or rush about getting kids ready for school?  What is your priority each morning?

I have found that when I put God first that my day - although it may still be hectic, as it has been lately, - will go much better.  I whisper prayers to Him through the day to help me through the tough stuff.  And right now I have some major challenges at work in completing tasks and I am really struggling, so have been doing a lot of praying lately.  And dropping big 'hints' to hubby that he needs to 'let me retire' because I don't want to learn new things; I don't want to do this anymore.  I know nothing about mail merge, and I don't want to learn.  I have specific tasks I enjoy and don't mind doing at all, but arranging flights for others to another city, arranging meetings in places I know nothing about, these things do nothing for me. Yet, I have to do them.  Even if I could retire next week, I still would have to do them today, so guess I may as well quit grumbling.  See why I need God so much throughout the day?

I had to attend a meeting late yesterday afternoon in which I was assigned tasks of scheduling specific meetings.  At least one of the choices was the Mesa office, of which I am aware of the conference rooms there,.  Need to arrange three meetings; not sure if all day or half days.  I was able to reserve the conference rooms before I signed off the computer after 5PM.  But, now I need to figure out the attendees and get the meetings on their calendars.  And I am still waiting on the President's executive assistant to send me dates he can fly with the others to attend these other meetings that I'm having to make in Colorado.  It's wearing me out!  

Sorry if I sound like I'm complaining (cause I am, but shouldn't - it's all part of the job), but I'm just really tired, I think.  With working from home and not seeing other people, this job has become a chore and not one that I enjoy.  I wouldn't mind learning these new things if I was in the office and had people close by that I could ask how to do them.  But, alas, I'm alone, and I have no idea who would know how and who could help me get it done.  I feel isolated and ... well, I still just don't want to mess with it.  Sigh.

So my priority today is asking God to help me through today.  I have much to do with taking off work tomorrow for our weekend getaway up north.  I'm looking forward to having a different scenery versus looking at a computer all day.  It will be cooler; hubby says the lows are in the 30's and the highs are in the 70's.  I guess I will be taking my sweats for sure!  When I don't have to get up for work, I sometimes sleep in until 5AM but with being in the hotel and no room to go shut the door, I may have to stay in bed until hubby wakes up, which is sometimes 5:30AM.  Maybe with getting the executive suite we will have a wall that I can at least go into the other room and begin my quiet time without disturbing him too much.  Breakfast is to be starting at 6AM so I know we will have to go down for breakfast before I finish my quiet time.  Hubby will start his after breakfast.  I am so ready to just not have to think about work - which means I have a lot to get done today.

Proverbs 3:5-6 (NKJV) "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." 

Sometimes one just has to tell God all about what is going on in their life and trust Him to get us through it.  And that's where I'm at this morning.  He knows all about the tasks I have before me; He knows all about the struggles I am having with learning and doing new things that I'm not comfortable with.  He knows all about my 'don't want to' and also about my 'can do and will do'.  He loves me in spite of me.  I have to trust that He will lead me where I need to go, to do what I need to do.

And you can trust Him as well.  When was the last time you talked to God about your life, what is going on, your hopes and dreams, your struggles?  He loves you more than you will ever remember (as my granddaughter tellls me), and He wants only the best for you.  Are you trusting Him to do what He can do for you?  Are you asking Him to intervene in your life and help you?  Trust God; no matter if the results are what you want or not, He knows best what is good for you.  Let Him bring it about.

God's best is always worth the wait.

Blessings!

Enjoyed a quiet evening....

We didn't have 'girls night out' again last night as my daughter was not feeling well.  She had spent some time at her doctor's office and getting x-rays again for her arm.  The technician is still saying no broken bones, but it has been a month and she still cannot move her arm without intense pain.  I am reminded of when I broke my wrist - it took 3 visits to the doctor and being sent for x-rays before they found the crack in the bone.  We don't know whether her bone is bruised or what.  It isn't swollen nor red; but any touch nearly causes her to fall in pain.  I know - I forgot and touched her arm on Sunday!  Yipes!  She's still wearing a brace, but the constant pain is wearing on her.  It would me as well.

Hubby met up with his friends last night and when he came home, he made a comment that his friend Bill bought his dinner last night.  I guess he felt bad about forgetting to meet up with hubby last Friday.  We didn't discuss it much; I had a movie on when hubby came back home.

Yeah, I stayed home and decided I wasn't going to do anything.  It was another crazy busy day at work (and I got 'assigned' a hugemongous task of finding an open day on about 12 calendars and working with airline schedules to fly a group to Colorado within a month's time for a 2-3 hour whiteboard meeting.  I sure hope God hears my prayers for help on this one!  I am still working on the project in Teams and now this.  Do they think I am supposed to work?  I told my one boss, who actually CALLED me to give me the 'assignment', that I was hired to look pretty; not actually DO work.  Then we both laughed and he proceeded to tell me what was needed to be done.  It will be another busy day and I am hoping I have this task completed and on the calendars before I take off Friday, cause I don't want to be thinking about it!

My new study I'm going to do arrived yesterday and my sister got hers as well.  It was fun doing Elijah together so am hoping we can also work through this one together.  It's a 12 week study and I've done it before, and I am looking forward to completing it again.  Looks like the workbook has been upgraded so there will be new things for me to think about.  This workbook is called 'Seeking Him'.  It's a personal renewal type and I'm looking forward to going through it.

Oh - back to last night - I finished up a baby blanket I was working on - and watched three movies!  Hey, hubby was gone, it was quiet, and I just went one after another.  The last one was on when he got home and finished watching it with me.  I had seen them all before, but I enjoyed each one all over again.  So it was a very quiet and peaceful evening for the most part. One that I needed.

I am reminded of my big brother, Sam, this morning.  My little scripture for today has a saying that I heard for the first time from my big brother, and I am reminded of him and how much I truly do miss him.   I hear this saying occasionally, and I sometimes see it on a plaque, but I've never bought one.  Maybe I should look for a nice plaque and find a place to put it.

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

Can you sit back and think about the times that 'took your breath away'?  I'm not talking about fear, but the things that were so joyful and memorable that you could never forget.  Perhaps something that God allowed you to be a part of that at the moment you didn't think much of it, but it has stayed with you.

My first thought of something that 'took my breath away' is when I saw my first grandchild.  I was totally smitten by the sight of her.  Oh that God blessed me with such a grandchild!  Yes, I've other grandchildren that I have been smitten by, and totally love and adore, but she was my first one.  She was the first one that I released to God for His care and protection, for Him to guide her life.  Releasing her to God was the hardest thing I had to do.  I was her grandmother; didn't I know what was best for her?  But He showed me that He could do so much more for her, and He has.

So right now I'm sitting here thinking of my big brother and how valuable living life is.  Some times I admit that I feel like I am smothered, that I 'have no life' because of my circumstances, but LIFE is what you make of it.  It's formed by the choices we make.  One day at a time, the choices we make, will either give us memories of special times, or they will fill us with regrets.  I don't have to sit and feel sorry for myself for my circumstances; I can get up and do things.  Bake cookies.  Read a book.  Learn something new.  Sew. Crochet/knit.  Write a letter. Spend time with God.  Pray.  Oh there are so many things one can do!  So many things that we put off, so many things we allow that don't take our breath away with the memory of them.  I'm guilty of that too.

So let's make a pact, shall we?  Let's look for that one moment that can take our breath away.  A phone call to a grandchild, writing a note of encouragement to a friend, spending time with Jesus.  It doesn't matter WHAT it is that we do, but do SOMEthing.  Do the dishes for your spouse.  Sit down and actually talk to a child about their dreams.  And if you can't do it for yourself, do it for someone else.  Perhaps they also need a moment that will take their breath away.

I have always said that one rose means more to me than a dozen.  It isn't the quanity, it's the thought behind the gift.  The little things that 'take my breath away'.

What is it that 'takes your breath away'?  What is it that you can do for someone else that will bless them and 'take their breath away' so that when our breaths on earth are ended, they will look back and think of that one special thing (or more) that was done for them, and they felt so loved and blessed.

Blessings!

I survived yesterday,

 but today - most of it anyway, will be very intense.  I had some struggles with work yesterday morning.  First of all, it was timecard day - which I had forgotten about - but no big deal; I've got it down now on how to approve timecards.  Then I couldn't get one timecard to come up.  I did everything (I thought) I was supposed to do, but it wouldn't come up.  So I contacted an admin who had helped me before, and we walked through it - and then I realized what I had NOT done ... I was bringing up 'previous schedule period' and not 'previous pay period'.  It does make a difference; I wasn't to approve the schedule but the pay period.  Got that done.  Then a director emailed me with the question of 'how do I?' and I drew a blank.  I could not remember how to do what she asked.  Luckily she had included someone else on the email and they responded back.  It was a morning where I was questioning my ability to do tasks - I couldn't remember!  I had only done this task one time a few weeks ago and I played with it to figure it out.  I'm still learning about the new system.  But still, the thoughts were entering my mind about not being able to remember, perhaps I need to consider............. hubby wouldn't like those thoughts at all!

The day went on by and then around 3PM another director assigned me a task.  Sounds simple enough, she gave good instructions on what she wanted done.  But I don't work with Teams (Microsoft Teams) except for meetings.  I haven't had to, nor do I want to.  And she assigned me a task.  8 documents in this Team site that I needed to copy and paste into another document, align margins, change font, number pages, and a few other things.  I sat and stared at it for several minutes because I wasn't sure what she was asking.  I finally did one, step by step as she told me, and then sent it to her to look at.  Was this what she was asking me to do?  And, yes, it was.  Once I got confirmation that it was, I was able to get a couple more completed before I signed off for the day.  But it is tedious work and takes a lot of time to complete just one, getting everything aligned.  And my 'don't want to' kept getting in the way.  Ever have those days?  Where your 'I don't want to do this anymore' keeps getting in the way of 'I need to get this completed'?   I will need to work on those first thing this morning and get them finished.  At least I think my attitude about it is better today.  Not sure what my problem was yesterday; I was just feeling so tired and weary, for some reason.

And then also in the afternoon I got notification that another director - whom I do not know - gave me access to his Team site.  I DON'T WANT ACCESS TO ANY OF THEM!  I have about 30 (not kidding!) Teams files on my computer and I don't work with any of them.  WHY all of a sudden are people deciding I need to go into their folders and do some work for them?  I don't want to!  I don't have anything to do with their departments; why are they giving me access??!!  UGH.  Then I try to tell myself that if I applied myself, I could learn a lot of things.  But I don't want to learn new things.  I want to be left alone.  But, as long as I'm working, I don't have much choice, do I?  UGH UGH UGH

Wow - I'm a grumbler today, aren't I!  I need to work on that this morning before I turn on my work computer.  Or even perhaps before I shut this one off!  Today, plus two days... and I'm off work for three days.  I need to 'hold that thought', right?  

A granddaughter contacted me last night with school photos of my great-granddaughter.  She is so beautiful, and looks so much like her mama!  We had a great conversation and it felt good to know she wants a good foundation for her child.  I shared with her that 'A mama's greatest joy is that her children are walking with the Lord'.  She agreed, and I'm glad her little one is getting that foundation laid in her life.

Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV)  "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."

That foundation was also laid in my life as I was growing up.  I did walk away from it - not really understanding it - for some years, but 39 years ago I finally understood that Jesus is all I need.  Not saying my life was perfect from then on out, for it definitely wasn't.  And still isn't.  But I knew that I had to make Jesus Lord of my life if I was going to live life to the fullest.  It is a step I have never regretted making.  I tried to instill this foundation in my own children, but alas, like me, they have chosen to reject Jesus and do their own thing at this time.  COVID played a part in some not attending church; I get that.  Many times I do not want to go personally to church; I love having jeans and t-shirt and no make-up on and sitting in my chair crocheting while watching the service.  Doesn't mean we don't participate in the worship and service; just means I'm comfortable.  But I also know we can't fellowship with other believers if we aren't there with other believers.

We did go to the 9AM service on Sunday (instead of the 11AM service) and it was good.  We felt more a part in that there were people that came to us and talked with us, where we didn't have that in the 11AM service other than our friends.  The preacher was good; he read and stuck to the scripture and it was a good message.  We sorta liked knowing that by a certain time we'd have to be out so that the 11AM group could come in - but being Easter, it did go over.  I understand when the Holy Spirit takes over the worship you should let it flow and not cut it off, but sometimes I must miss it totally for it feels like it becomes a performance after awhile.  Or my critical spirit is coming out.  We may end up at this church, but we both agree that the 9AM service would have to be the one we go to.  

I think I've 'lost' my garden.  I looked at it Sunday morning and although a few leaves had been eaten, it wasn't bad... yesterday morning I went to check on it and nearly every single leaf of every plant - but one romaine lettuce plant - was eaten.  All that was there was stalks.  Even my herbs! ALL of the cilantro, which hadn't been eaten before, was stalks!  I cut them all down, put a mixture of dishsoap and water on it, and now I wait.  So disappointing.  I had some dreams of it all being full and growing... and bugs are eating it all up.  Other than that one worm, I have seen no bugs or worms.  But something is obviously getting into the garden at night and eating every single plant - the cilantro, basil, mint, rosemary, my spinach is gone, so disappointing.  Next year it may be flowers in my garden!  In fact, I may get one or two now and put in there with the hopes of getting rid of these bugs.  I heard marigolds keep mosquitos away and we have those little tiny ones that drive me crazy when we sit out front in the early evening.  So much for being a farm girl.

It's kind of like life, isn't it?  We are planted in a firm foundation and it doesn't take long before the world starts nibbling at us.  It throws things at us that seem good, and they feel good, but they end up destroying us, till we are but a stalk of what we should be.  We allow the worms and bugs to keep enticing us, till our strong green leaves of life become barren and we become empty stalks, empty of the life that God has for us.  We get cut down, but do we begin to grow again?  Do our leaves come forth to be eaten again?  Do we allow the things of this world to capture us again?  That is up to us.  Do we wash off those bugs of deceit with soap and water and choose to live again?  Something to think about.

Today is Tuesday and another busy day ahead of me.  I don't mind the work; I just don;t want to learn new things if I don't want to.  I was having such a rough day yesterday I even ate a dish of ice cream last night and I haven't done that for some time!  Of course it didn't help either that the two pounds I had lost two weeks ago came back after Easter lunch!

Psalm 118:24 (NKJV):  "This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it."

Ok - I'm making a choice to rejoice in today and change my attitude because the Lord made it and has allowed me to be in it.  What are you going to do?

Blessings!

The beginning of a short week

 This week hubby's mood will be fairly good, but he will also probably be easily irritated at changes.  Especially if it involves him.  Why?  I'm sure it is just that I notice it more than others, but as he approaches these older birthdays, he gets more and more frustrated over the little things.  Perhaps I will be wrong this year.  His 85th birthday will be this Friday.  We recently have had conversations about his lack of strength and ability to do things only because he quit doing them.  "Taking a break because I've had to do it all my life" sometimes means losing your life.  He somewhat sees that now.  Taking a pill for your health isn't always a good thing, when it is your own fault that your body doesn't respond the way it should.

But back to this week, I am only working 4 days this week (whoo hoo!) and we have things in place for the weekend.  I've already told him the basics.  AZ Christian University is putting on Beauty and the Beast at Greenway High School this weekend.  I bought tickets for Thursday evening.  I'm not sure if it is music or drama, but we're going.  I think one can go to Eventbrite and see what the showings are - and it's only $15 each.  I thought of my granddaughter, but she lives too far away for just a quick trip up to attend.

Friday morning I have manicures and pedicures scheduled for both hubby and I.  Yes, he loves to be pampered too.   After that, we'll probably head to an early lunch and then pick up our things and head north for the weekend.  We are both looking forward to getting out of town (him moreso than me as I'm the one paying for it).  But it is his birthday weekend and it makes him feel valued - and isn't that what we all want?  To feel valued?    

I'm really looking forward to a day off work.  Some days it isn't bad, but somedays are really chaotic and busy.  My 'don't want to' comes to the surface more than 'want to' does.   And if I wasn't working, what would I do?  Play at first; but then I'd find a part time job somewhere.  I don't know what, nor where, but I know I can't just sit at home and crochet or read and that's it.  I'm tired of board meetings and powerpoints and all that stuff that goes wi

th an office job.  Maybe I would need to look into being a 'Walmart greeter'; I think I would be good at that. :-)

Proverbs 27:1 (NIV) "Therefore do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day will bring."

Matthew 6:34 (NIV): "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

James 4:14 (NIV):  "Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes."

I think James says it best.  What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Wow.  Profound.  So many people think that when they can retire from their jobs they can do this or that... and perhaps most do.  I know I personally have no great plans as far as retirement.  But I know of people who 'retire' and then ... well, my dear Uncle Winfred, for one.... he was a good man, a godly man.  But one week after he retired at age 65, he was out mowing his grass and had a heart attack and died.  So much for retirement.  God called him Home.

And I've met and known people who retire and they are having a great life - traveling, volunteering, and living life.  I'm hoping I will fall into this group once I am finally able to retire.  I think God has a firm picture in mind for my life after retirement, and I have to be patient and wait specifically for His timing.  It may be He will never want me to retire.  This may be my life I am to live.  One never knows, for one can never depend on tomorrow happening.

Ok - cut and erase!  Some mornings my thoughts wander off and I get too deep, me thinks.  I need to live for today, and hope for tomorrow's blessings.  

Hubby must not have slept well again last night; he looked grumpy when he brought in my coffee, and I noticed he was up before I woke up at 4AM.  I didn't ask, but I will be told when I come out of my room.  I'm sorry  he doesn't sleep well, but there isn't anything I can do about it.  He keeps me awake most nights and I think he woke me at 1:15AM as I woke up and heard him walking down the hall.  He probably went to sleep in his recliner, which during the day he finds no problem in doing so - and sleeping 1-2 hours at times.  Shoot, when I wake up and can't go back to sleep, I come in here and either climb in to the bed (if I don't have my stuff all over it) or in my recliner.  But I don't complain about it. some people make it a ritual.  

So what are you going to do about Today?  Make it a good day.  Be kind.  Be loving.  Be thoughtful. Be gracious.  Be quick to forgive.  Be quick to help.   Your attitude and actions this morning can make or break your day.  Make it a good one.

Blessings!

Today..... our atonement is complete

 The sacrifice of Jesus for our sins is complete in that today, the third day, Jesus rose from the dead and is alive.  For some people, even now, they find that hard to believe - even more so than they did then - BUT, what is there not to believe?  Can you not believe that God, our Heavenly Father, loves you so much that He would give up His One and Only Begotten Son, for you?  Jesus said you are worthy.  He willingly went to the cross, suffered greatly, and died for you and for me.  What a wondrous Savior He is!

But there are those who will not believe.  There are those who do believe, but refuse to follow.  There are those who wonder about the truth.

I Corinthians 1:18 (NIV):  "For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God."

This day of 'celebration' has evolved into Easter baskets and big lunches/dinners and gatherings.   It has been many years since I have bought Easter baskets.   And now I wonder why I did that as I have learned more about Easter and its true meaning.  I guess because that is just how I grew up.  Some things we just continue on - including taking photos in our fancy Easter outfits - and generally MY children would all be frowning because 1) they were mad about something and 2) they didn't like to get their photo taken!

As I looked today at where the Easter baskets came from, I read that they come from a pagan source.  Google tells me that an Anglo-Saxon goddess, Ostara, had a pet bird that would lay brightly colored eggs. She would turn her pet bird into a rabbit on Easter (and it continued laying eggs) and thus came up with the Easter bunny.

Another theory is that Easter baskets and the Easter Bunny were brought to America in the 18th Century by German immigrants who settled in Pennsylvania.  They brought the idea of the egg-delivering hare called "Osterhase" with them, along with the idea that children should prepare nests for the bunny to leave brightly colored eggs on Easter.

There are several other 'theories' or 'guesses' of how the tradition of Easter baskets generated, and they all may be true.  But Easter baskets are still just that.  Easter baskets.  Full of chocolate (usually) and colorful papers and items.  I beleive they are to symbolize 'newness' and 'fresh'.

But the true meaning of Easter is Jesus.  He gives us New Life in Him.  When we believe that Jesus is the Son of God, that He died on the cross for our sins, and He rose again on the third day, and we profess that, we have newness of Life in Him.  When we make Him Lord (instead of all these other distractions), we are assured of eternal life with Him.

John 3:16 (NIV):  "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

Easter meant we all got new outfits - symbolizing the 'newness of life'.  I can't remember the last time I bought a new outfit for Easter.... I think it was back in 1983.  We never had money for new Easter clothes after that. And now, it doesn't matter.  The dress I plan to wear to church today (if it still fits!) is probably nearly 3 -4 years old - and that's ok cause I haven't wore a dress much the past 2.5 years due to working at home.  Jeans and T-shirt is my usual attire for the home office.

What do you think about when you consider Easter?  Have you shared the story of Easter with your children as they were growing up?  If you didn't take them to church, and you don't tell them, you are held responsible for their lives not serving God.  How do they know about Jesus if you don't share it with them?

Last night we watched an Easter live performance by Free Chapel.  They are doing multiple performances this weekend.  It is now posted on You Tube - Go to Jentezen Franklin, and select Easter - A Live Experience.  It's about an hour long, and very briefly goes through what happened and brought about Easter.  And yes, when I imagine/see the scourging and all that Jesus went through for me - and for you - it brought tears to my eyes.

How can anyone love someone so much, who isn't even in existence yet- and yet, He knew us and He loved us so much, He willingly gave up His life for us.

There is no greater love.  He loves me, O how He loves me!  He loves you, O how He loves you!   O how He loves!!

'At the cross, at the cross, where I first saw the light, and the burden of my heart rolled away.  It was there by faith, I received my sight, and now I am happy all the day."

Easter blessings to you and yours.

Sayit isn't so....

 As an addendum to yesterday's comments, Bill never showed up for breakfast with hubby.  They were to meet at 7:30AM.  At 8:00AM, hubby was texting him.  A bit later Bill text'd him back with "I forgot.  I didn't put it in my phone."  Hubby went ahead and ate breakfast - alone - and came home.  Yeah, there definitely seems to be some problems with Bill's memory; this is not the first time.  Even when he puts it in his phone, he forgets to look.

That's why I like paper calendars.  I don't use the phone calendar.  I try to stay off my phone.  It's supposed to be for my convenience, not necessity.  I write everything on my calendar, and if I'm afraid I will forget, I will write it on a sticky note and put it where I will see first thing.  For example, I knew last Wednesday I was meeting my boss for breakfast.  I also knew I would not be looking at my calendar for the day until about 6:45AM when I would be getting on my computer to work.  So that I wouldn't forget I need to stop my quiet time a little early so that I could clean up for our meeting, I wrote myself a note and laid it on the table beside my chair.  I don't look at my phone in the mornings as a rule so I make reminders for myself (always have, always will) so that I know what is important to me.  And it works for me.

Yesterday was a very slow day at work.  My one boss only had a couple meetings all day and she was taking off early for a personal appointment.  My other boss had several meetings, but then was taking off around 2:30PM for a personal appointment.  So I told them both that since it was slow, and since they were taking off for personal appointments early afternoon, so was I.  After all, it was Good Friday, I told them, and that was my excuse.  So I did.  I got up from the computer about 2:30-ish and hubby and I went to Olive Garden for a late lunch/early dinner.  I wasn't that hungry, but ate soup and salad; hubby got the (ugh) eggplant.  It was nice that there was not a lot people there at that time.  And, daggone it, they have a lunch special Monday-Friday from 11-3PM, and we got there at 3:01PM.  I could have saved $2 on my soup and salad (endless) - and get for $9.99 instead of the $11.99 that I ended up paying for it.  But that's ok.  

I don't think there is anything on the calendar for today.  I need to 'work' on my garden bed.  Some bugs/worms keep eating all my garden.  I'm going to fix up a mixture of dish soap and water and spray on what is left, hoping it will save some.  I'm down to one lettuce from 5, I think.  But two of the cherry tomato plants have little tomatoes on them!  The others may have one or two flowers on them, but that's it.  I may have to give up on a vegetable garden... and next year plant flowers - will see.  Or maybe I'll try again.  It's just disappointing that worms/bugs are eating everything up.  I'll check them out again today.

Zephaniah 3:17:  "The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing."

"Trust the past to God's mercy, the present to God's love, and the future to God's providence."  St. Augustine.

I am grateful for God's mercy over my past.  I am thankful for God's love for today,.  And I am trusting my future to God's providence.  How are you doing with all that?  Something to think about.

And... I got nothing else for this morning.... I'm just enjoying the quiet of the morning for just a few more minutes before I have to come out of my room.  

Have a blessed day!

I finally said it.... in love....

 Last night hubby was kind of quiet.  After dinner I was reading until about 8PM when my older sister called - which is highly unusual as it was 11PM there.  She was telling me about her day and why she was still awake - she had actually gotten out of her apartment and got some tasks accomplished (her son drove her around) such as getting her drivers license renewed (she has been told not to drive.... WHY would the DL renew her license (it had expired in January) when she has both hands bandaged up from falling, she can't hardly walk (has to use a walker)... what are they thinking?)  and her car license renewed.  Her son is back home from his latest stent in the hospital so was driving her around to get these accomplished.  When she finally got back home, she was exhausted so laid down across the bed and slept six hours.  No wonder she was wide awake at 8PM!  

During my conversation hubby told me he was going to take a shower and left the room.  As my phone call was ending, he came back in and sat down.  He comments, "have you ever not liked yourself?"  I had to ask for an explanation for I wasn't sure where he was going with it.  But let me back up to earlier in the day.

I was working, and he decided he had to come in and chat with me, interrupting the things I was doing.  I tried to give him my undivided attention, but you know when you are chatting with your boss, you need to give it attention as well.  He was telling me his frustration with his friend Bill.  Bill is a good man, but is so terrified he is going to get Alzheimers that he is always reading up on it, taking every kind of pill imagineable.  His mom had died from it and he feels he will have it too.  I understand that fear, but don't let fear take life away from you.  Anyway.... hubby was telling me how he is to have breakfast with Bill on Friday (today) and they had decided this on Tuesday evening when they met for Bible study, they would meet at a certain time, and had even decided the location.  (the last time they met, Bill went to one place and hubby went to the other - and hubby had made him put the locationin his phone!)  Bill had also requsted that hubby remind him, which he did yesterday morning.  But Bill didn't remember where they were to meet, so hubby told him again.  So hubby was pouring out his frustrations with Bill and him not remembering things.....(he has even forgotten to show up for their weekly Bible studies!) and as hubby walked out the door, I made my comment.  In love.

I told him that what he is feeling with Bill, I feel with him at times.  He asked what I meant.  So I told him.  He constantly interrupts me throughout the day when I'm working, many times with a question that he should know the answer.  Or he should know how to do something.  I have asked him before to talk to his doctor about his memory, that he can be given something to delay dementia.  And he says that he does, but the doctor says his memory is fine.  I'm not worried so much about conversations being remembered that he just had, but the things he cannot remember.  He asks questions like 'how will I know the hamburger I'm frying will be done?' and 'my computer says it isn't connected to the internet, what do I do?' and 'which would be the best way to go to....' (and I take that as he doesn't remember how to get there so asks that question as it may be to church, to one of the children's houses).  It's the little things like that - that scares me to death.  And as I told him, I could see that he knew what I was saying.  And I also told him that we both are getting older and yes, we will forget things.  We don't do the things we used to do, and we have lost the ability to do things we used to do, for the lack of not doing them.  He will turn 85 next week and he thinks he is still just as alert as he was at 20.  But I told him that his frustration with Bill is the exact frustration I feel when he does the things he does.

So last night, he tells me that he couldn't get my conversation with him earlier out of his mind.  He doesn't see himself losing his memory or his ability to do things.  He feels he is just as mentally active as always.  So I reminded him, he doesn't DO anything ....  he goes to his Bible study, he does the lessons, he does the laundry about every 10 days and he washes the dishes at night as a rule.  He sat there for a moment and said I was right.  He doesn't do anything.  We talked about my treadmill and weights that are in the back room - and I know I need to use them too, I've been lazy - and suggested he start with even ten minutes on the treadmill and quit NOT using his right shoulder because if he raises it so far it hurts.  Take a 3 pound weight and raise it as far as he can to keep strength in his arm.  He agreed he needs to do something.  I knew he was depressed because of our earlier conversation.  I know he was depressed because of the reality of the conversation we were then having.  But it eventually happens to us all.  

The agony of getting older.  My mother's mind was still sharp to the day she died, and she was turning 86.  I am hoping that I can be at least able to think clearly to the end.  Hubby's dad died of a massive heart attack at 74 and he doesn't know of his family history as his dad was adopted.  I'm hoping our conversation will help him in his attitude with his friend.  I told him he needed to be kind; if Bill is having memory issues, be patient with him.... as I have to be patient with hubby.  He seemed to understand that.

I hope my children will have this conversation with me as they notice things.  As long as I am able, I want to live in my own home, but if the time should ever come that I cannot think clearly, then I'm willing to go into an assisted living.  Not that hubby needs to go there, not saying that.  I just wanted him to understand and realize that we are getting older, and this is just part of life.  I'm scared of what the future holds for him, and for me with him.  But one thing I do know,

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV):  "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

I don't know what the future holds for hubby, or for me.  But I know that the Lord is in control of both.  I need have no fear, for He is God, and I am not.

Blessings!

I'm feeling it again....

 but will I ever decide to even start?  Actually, there are TWO things I've been feeling ....  1) I look at my soft flabby arms and know I need to push myself to go work out.  Build my muscles. Gain strength.  You know, that kind of stuff.  I sometimes see a photo on Facebook with two photos.  One is a woman who is 70 and she reminds me of my grandma.  Chubby, sitting down, hands folded, long dress, white hair pulled back in a bun.  You have seen those photos, right?  The other photo is also a woman who is 70.  She is standing in workout clothes with a slender strong body, with her arms raised showing her biceps.  And then the caption is something like "which would you rather be?"  I'm the flabby, chubby one sitting down right now, and I don't want to be that way.  Sigh.  I have my weights, my weight bench, my treadmill, etc. so what is my problem?  I don't want advice.  I don't want 'anyone' suggesting to me what I need to do.  I don't want 'anyone' watching me.  I want them to pretend I'm not there.  I want to do it by myself, unless I ask for help.  And some people think they know it all - although they have every excuse not to be doing it themselves.  I have my workout books, and I can do just fine.

I need to move beyond that and just do it.  Right?  I've been watching my food intake for three weeks and haven't lost anything much to speak of.  Now hubby, on the other hand, tells me he has lost 9 pounds.  He is the only man I know that can go to the doctor and lose the same 4-5 pounds EVERY time he goes.  It's like he goes and weighs in, gets a weight.  Eats everything until a few days before he goes back, he loses it.  Now whether the doctor is telling him he lost the four pounds or he is telling me he has lost the 4 pounds... I just don't question.  It's kind of like my mother used to say.  "I've lost 100 pounds this year."  We puase and look at her and she responds, "the same 5 pounds 20 times." 

The second thing?  I've mentioned before that this is a dream I have had all my life.  Because of my love for books, I've always wanted to write my own book.  We watched a movie last night; one that we had seen before but had forgotten.  The story line was about a publishing house and an author.  Yes, it was a romantic movie, and it was a good one.  But it put the longing in my heart again to want to write.  I have no time right now to even ponder a good topic, a good story line; besides, what could I write about?  My life has not been adventurous, at all.  I haven't done any great thing (other than raising 3 awesome children, having 11 awesome grandchildren, and almost 7 great-grandchildren) andI didn't even do all that!  I often dreamed of writing a book.  Perhaps someday.  Perhaps when I can retire and have time to research and think and take my time.  I've heard of lots of older people who didn't write their first book until they were 'old'.  Haven't you?  I still have time to hope, to dream, right?

I met my boss for breakfast yesterday and we both talked about retirement.  The difference?  Her husband is wanting her to go ahead and retire now.  He retired a few years ago; they have not spent money foolishly (following the Dave Ramsey plan), and have invested some.  She's 62.  She wants to wait until she turns 65 so that she can immediately go on Medicare.  I am 72, and my husband panics if I even mention wanting to retire.  I've always been his security blanket.  There would be a lot of changes if I retired now.  I know we could do it, I made sure of that when we bought this place.  One of us could stay here and make it.  I never want to be a burden on any of my children.  I love my 'space'.  I just don't get much of it now.  I told my boss that if she decided to retire before our 'set' date of January 10, 2025, I would need to retire too.  (Did that ever set hubby off when It old him that!  Talk about anxiety! LOL) But on the other hand, I couldn't sit here at home day after day with hubby and not do anything.  So even working from home is mental therapy for me.  But, I do long to be 'free to be me', which is something I haven't been able to do for at least 40 years.

One more week until our weekend getaway up north.  I am looking forward to the mani/pedi that I have scheduled for both of us next Friday.  After that we'll have lunch and then take our time heading north for the weekend.  Hubby's 85th birthday is next Friday - and since I had no idea of what to get him as he needs nothing - and I know how he likes to 'get out of town', decided I'd play it to my advantage and go north where we know all the shops are. :-)  Not that I need anything either.  Except yarn.  I always need yarn.

Finished up a Christmas gift last night only to realize I left off one color.  I need to figure out how to insert this color, perhaps overlay the design.  I don't know right now, but will figure it out.  It can be unique in its own design.  I also talked with my boss about sewing and we both want to get back into that as well.  I enjoy making things 'by hand', and have made all the baby quilts for the grandchildren by hand.  And I have a couple baby quilts ready to be sewn, but to make the decision between sewing and crocheting, it's easier to crochet.  And quieter.

Hmmmm, my printer is making noises and I haven't sent anything over to it.  I really need to turn it off unless I plan to use it.  It's been awhile, but there have been some mornings I can come in and find papers all over the floor with one continuous line where it has typed over and over on that line - and I have no idea where it comes from.  I'll get up and check it soon.  I see a message of some sort on the screen.

Have you ever looked back over your life and seen times that you wished you had chosen differently?  Do you sometimes feel sad because you made the choice you did?  Even with bad choices, if we learn from them, they can become good choices.  I've made a lot of bad choices over the years, and I've learned from many of them.  I've also made bad choices that I still need to learn from!  Sometimes it feels like life is so hard...how will I get through it; and yet, I know that I will.  Sometimes we need to let go of the past so that we can live for and in the future.

Philippians 3:12-14 (NIV):  "Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.  Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.  But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind, and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

In fact, I heard a Rabbi speak one day and he actually said these words:  "God can not take you to your future, if you won't let go of your past."  Thought-provoking.   "Let it go".  Learn from it, but let it go.

Blessings!

I love my quiet evenings.....

 Last night my usual Tuesday evening plans fell through becuase my daughter's arm is still too sore to crochet so we didn't meet up.  Hubby went off to his study with his friends and I stayed home.  I did some things that I wanted to do when hubby wasn't home (cause he always thinks he needs to 'help' and some things I just don't want help on - I want to do it myself!!) and then worked on my on-going puzzle for a little bit.  Then I decided I'd watch a movie instead of reading.  In fact, I watched two that I had seen before, and that's ok.  Didn't remember all and it was good to watch again.  And, while I was doing that, I was able to crochet on a Christmas gift.  Yeah, I have no idea what to get people this year so am starting on certain things early.  It was a wonderful, enjoyable, and quiet evening and I enjoyed it very much.  As you can probably figure out from my whining the past two years, I don't get those evenings - or days - very often.  I treasure them right now cause it is a break from my normal busy days.

I haven't started a new book to read yet, although I have a few beside my chair.  Two I have read before, but I learn from them every time I read them.  Yeah, they aren't romance novels.  I leave that to my movies.  I love to read biographies of Biblical people.  Elijah is my favorite, then David, and Daniel, and of course Jesus.  There are a few others I like as well that I read specifically about.  And I don't care if I re-read; I get something out of them each time.  I am doing a study on James and have completed the first lesson.  Found a free online study from Dallas Theological Seminary and the first week was good.  I about 'froze' when I saw there was a test to complete and submit.  But I passed it 100%.  Haven't watched the second session yet, but I have ...ah, I remember writing about it the other day now.  It's a bear getting older and forgetting things.  But I have the commentary now and I can read about James.

This morning, though, I need to cut my time short and get ready to head out.  I'm meeting my boss this morning for our breakfast and catch up.  I'm so grateful we are friends as well, and have been for over 25 years.  She is an amazing woman and I have great respect for her.  Plus she likes me, which helps. I love meeting her for breakfast or lunch and it starts my day off good.  And, because I'm with my boss, and we do discuss some work, it's ok if I am gone 2-3 hours at the start of this day.  I will be online for about an hour before I head out.  Need to let my other boss I'm going to be 'out' for a little bit this morning.  Looking forward to enjoying breakfast with her.

My garden bed isn't doing so well.  It started out good, and then I saw that something was eating my leaves.  I 'worked' on my garden some yesterday, pulling out dead and dying parts and found a little green worm that has obviously been eating on my plants.  I did remove it from my garden, but are there others?  It's green, so I can easily miss seeing it.  Hopefully my garden will continue to grow some.  That worm has already 'killed' two plants so I'm hoping it was the only one.  I need to cook and use up my herbs - cut back a lot of my mint yesterday, thanks to the worm eating nearly every single leaf.

It's kind of like life, isn't it?  Life seems to be going well, growing in ways that it should, and we let a worm get in.  That little worm could be anything.  It could be attitude.  It could be conflicts.  It could be distractions.  It could be, well, just about anything.  That worm gets in and little by little eats away at our lives and causes conflict.  It eats away at us until we are grumpy and irritable, and no fun to be around.  Things bother us more because we are being eaten up with anxiety, with worry, with our thoughts on how we are being treated.  (after all, it is all about us, right?)  We let the worm in, and it slowly works it's way through us and literally eats us alive.

Kind of like the serpent in the garden, you think?  You remember the Garden of Eden, right?  And how the serpent Devil tempted Eve in the garden about eating from the tree of Life that God had told Adam and Eve not to eat of it.  Oh, that evil serpent, the worm, not only enticed Eve, but worded it so that it made Eve pause to believe what the serpent said.  And Adam, whom God had told specifically not to eat of that tree, after Eve had bitten into the fruit, took it from Eve and ate it.  What can we learn from this story?

If God says don't eat it, then don't eat it!!  No matter how much you are tempted!  No matter how much you want to give in.  If God said it, and you know He said it, you better believe you better not do it!

Sometimes we can relate that to our children.  As parents, it is our 'job' to raise our children in the admonition of the Lord.  We are to teach our children to love the Lord and obey him.  Just like we teach our children to obey us.  We want them to do what we say without argument, without commenting back. We should learn from that, you think?  When God tells us not to do something, or to do something, shouldn't we also immediately do it - because God said it?

If the Holy Spirit brings to mind the name of someone, do you pause and wonder why?  Do you pick up the phone and perhaps call or text and just ask 'how you doing'?  Or do you ignore the thought and just go on with your day?  What if that name came to mind and you didn't do anything and then later you heard that something happened to that person?  Or not, it may be only that at that time they needed a friend to say they cared.  So many times we read stories of people who are so sad that they have no will to live any more.  They wish that someone would reach out that they care.

I read a story one time about a young woman who was going to end her life.  She was ready to do so, and yet, something inside of her caused her to pick up the phone and make a phone call.  She somehow misdialed and the call went to a pastor who was on his way out the door to go home after a long day.  He paused, thinking whether or not he should answer - if he answered, he could be there for awhile and he was tired; or he could ignore the ringing and go on home.  They could leave a message, right?  He chose to answer the phone.  After a lot of silence and questions/answers, he realized that he had answered that phone for a reason.  God had directed that call to this pastor so that he could share Hope with this girl.  It all hit home when she told him that if he had not answered his phone, she was going to end her life, because she had told God if no one answered, then no one cared, and there was no reason for her to live.  God showed her she had every reason to live, for in life, there is always Hope.

Hope.  What is your definition of Hope?  Have you given up hope?  Hope for life changes that never happen?  Hope that your marriage will turn around?  Hope that your children will come back into the fold?  Hope that you can keep the job your have and hope that you have money to pay the bills?  What is the Hope that you have?

Psalm 33:20 (NIV) "We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield."

Our hope can not be found in material things.  Our hope is found only in Jesus.    Jesus is the Author and Perfector of our faith.  Our Hope is in Him alone.

What are you hoping for?  Have you taken a moment to talk to Jesus about it?  He is always available; you only need to open your mouth and speak.  You don't get a busy signal.  You don't get voicemail when you call Jesus.  

Philippians 4:6 (NLT):  "Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done."

Blessings!