Do you believe?

We went to the RV park yesterday and hubby spoke on the subject of prayer and fasting.  I've done a lot of both, so knew most of the information he gave, but occasionally he would say something that would click.  Prayer I can do, but fasting is lot harder.  Some people think they can fast the TV (yeah, hubby has done that) - but fasting isn't really that.  Unless you take that time to spend it in prayer.  He didn't.  He just read a book.  Or decided a movie wasn't giving up TV, so he could watch a movie.  I didn't argue with him - it wasn't my fast.  No I'm not sharing that to criticize him.  I'm just saying that isn't real fasting.

Fasting is giving up something you love (like food) for something you love more.  And the point of fasting is that you spend more time in prayer and solitude, seeking God for specific answers to your prayers.  I don't enjoy fasting - but I find it brings me closer to God, if I fast His way.  We often do the Daniel fast, which is eating only fruits and vegetables (the first 10 days Daniel fasted, he ate only vegetables).  Hubby just can't give up meat and I don't fight him anymore.  I need to.  I need to fix for him, and then fast the way I want to.  I remember the last time he 'let' me fast the way I felt God was calling me to fast - I mean, God TOLD me He wanted me to fast about something - and it was a 3 day fast - and I spent more time praying and I had only water.  That was the best experience I can ever remember.  I used to give up food totally one day a week.... but ...  church and life got complicated and I stopped.  I've tried to get back into now but ... I can go one or two meals without hubby noticing....but he always likes us to have dinner together.  I think I'll pray about that and see how God directs me.  I don't want it to be about me... but I want my prayers answered and sometimes one has to pray AND fast, for an answer to come.

Mark 9:29 (NKJV)  "So He said to them, 'This kind can come out by nothing but prayer and fasting.'"

If the results you are praying for aren't happening (and you know that you are praying in God's will), try fasting with it.  You will be amazed how God answers.  I fasted before a service a few years ago, a service in which I spoke on healing of the heart... healing of painful pasts, of words said, of things done, and for physical healing.  After the service, hubby and I stood at the front with oil and anyone who wanted prayer for healing to come forward and we would pray for them.  There was one man I prayed for - at that time we didn't know these people very well - but he asked me to pray for him - and I didn't know specifically what it was for.  He has since told me that he had kidney cancer - and when he went back home to his doctor, it was gone.  THAT IS ALL GOD.  But that has endeared me to him since.  I give God all the glory for his healing and praise God that He is still in control.  It's been 5 or more years since then and this man is still strong and healthy - and he is in his 80's!

I was surprised yesterday when we were at the church.  A man who got us to first come there hasn't been in the greatest of health, and I saw he was walking with a cane with great difficulty.  I went over to talk with him and he stood up (respectful gentleman he is) to talk with me.  He told me of the vertebrae in his back pinching a nerve, pain in his left leg, and a few other things.  I felt impressed to pray for him and I asked him if I could pray for him.  His comment surprised me.  "Where were you a few weeks ago when all this happened!  It's too late now!"  I looked at him and said, "well, I don't think that God cares when He heals, He just needs to be asked to bring healing."  So the man said I could pray for him, and I did.  I was so surprised at what I felt was a lack of faith.  As we were leaving, he was walking out - with his cane (I really wanted to tell him to let it go and walk!) - and after we chatted with him a few minutes, I just told him to have faith; God is still in the healing business.

And it made me sad that people do not believe in healing anymore.  Oh, they want healing, but they don't think God will do it for them.  I say, "Why not you?"   When I am sick, I pray for my healing.  When hubby is sick, we pray for his healing.  But you have to believe for the healing to take place!  I read once of a healing pastor whose sister was in a wheelchair.  They had had a healing service and others were praying over his sister to get up out of that wheelchair.   She felt her legs tingling, she was literally raised up (not by man, but God) from her chair a few inches - but instead of putting her legs down to the floor and standing up - healed - she grabbed hold of the arms of the wheelchair and pulled herself back into it.  She didn't believe she could be healed - and she remained in that wheelchair the rest of her life. How sad is that?

If you don't have faith for healing, do you have faith at all?  Pray for more faith, that you can believe that Jesus is that Son of God and that He is still in the healing business - no matter what type of healing is needed!

Mark 9:14-29 shares a story about a man who brought his son, who often would throw himself into the fire or water.  The disciples couldn't heal him.  When Jesus came to where it was being discussed, He said:

Mark 9:23-24 (NKJV) "Jesus said to him, if you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes."  Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, "Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!"

I believe that if we pray according to God's will, that He will do whatever He wants!  I've seen prayers answered; I've seen prayers not answered.  But when I do my part and pray  - and sometimes fast - for what my request is, God always answers.  Yes, I may get upset that God didn't answer the way I wanted Him to, but He always sees the big picture and knows that what He allows then, will be answered in the now.

This message is totally different than the one I had planned to write.  Guess God wanted me to share this, instead of our lazy Sunday.

Do you need to say to Jesus, "Lord, help my unbelief"?  

Blessings!

Three words....

 No, the three words are not I Love You.  That was what you thought of first, right?  Or maybe it was Faith, Hope, and Love?  But again, that isn't what I'm writing about today.  I read about three other words in my devotional this morning and I want to share them with you.

The first word is Denial.  Definition:  Refusing to acknowledge the reality of a situation.  How many of us do that?  We deny that our children are all over the place.  We deny that we are doing anything wrong.  We deny that our behavior causes chaos.  We deny that we need anyone; we can do it on our own.

The second word is Projection.  Definition: Acknowledging the reality of the situation but denying any responsibility.  Example:  You are sitting at your computer and your friend comes over and sits his (or her) drink on the desk and starts talking to you.  In animated conversation, using hands that fly every which direction (yes, I talk with my hands), the drink is knocked over and it spills all over the computer keyboard.  You look at it in horror; your friend just runs to get something to wipe it off with.  In the meantime, this scene is being played in your mind in slow motion as you think of what you need to do - back up the hard drive; get the drink out of the keyboard (too late, of course, as the screen flickered and went black just as the drink hit it).  Your friend tries to make a joke about it and then leaves.  You shut the computer and try to figure out what to do.  

The third word is Minimization.  Minimization is acknowledging the reality of the situation and even owning responsibility for it, but denying its seriousness.  Minimization is another tactic we use to avoid honesty.  We tell ourselves partial and palatable truths.  We downplay and tell ourselves "It's not that bad."  Let's say your friend calls you a few days later to apologzie and makes this comment:  "I hope your computer dried out, and it didn't end up being a big deal."  Even if it was done unintentionally, the responsibility of the situation is minimized.

Isn't that sometimes what we do in life?  We deny we do something wrong.  Then we may acknowledge "well, yeah, that did happen.", and then we tell ourselves "I'm sure it wasn't a big deal".  We see it in our lives if we want to be honest with ourselves, and we see it in others lives as well.

There is a saying - I don't know who started it, but I've heard Dr. Charles Stanley say it a few times:

"Sin will always take you farther than you want to go.  Sin will always cost you more than you want to pay. Sin will alwys keep you longer than you want to stay."

Scripture doesn' minimize the consequences of sin.  God takes sin very seriously.  In the Old Testament, when God wanted to warn the people that destruction was coming, He would most often send a prophet.  The prophet would confront the people with the truth of where things were heading.  Instead of repenting, the people would frequently minimize the prophet's message, and instead of turning back to God, they would continue down the same path and reap the consequences of their sin.  When they ignored God's messages through Jeremiah, for example, Israel was enslaved by the Babylonians for seventy years.   But when the people were brutally honest and repented of their sin, God would respond with compassion and grace.  

Joel 2:13 - "Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity."

God's offer of compassion and grace is still wide open to each one of us.  Remember the prodigal son?  God waits with open arms for us to awaken, get honest, and take action to return to Him.  Being honest with our sin means we stop minimizing and instead recognize that whatever took us away from God, is a big deal, after all.

Thankfully our heavenly Father's love and forgiveness is a much bigger deal.   Stop and think about that habit, that one thing, that is keeping you from returning to God. 

Blessings!

Whose fault was it?

 I read something interesting this morning that I really hadn't thought about. Or actually, I really didn't know cause I don't deal in insurance.  There was this guy who was driving around a crowded parking lot (probably around Christmas!) and found a very tight area to squeeze his vehicle into.  As he opened his door, a gust of wind grabbed the door (this ever happen to you?) and slammed it into the car next to him.  He left his insurance information on the parked vehicle and went on to do his shopping.  After all, it was his fault that he didn't have a good hold on the door, right?  Well, he called his insurance company the next day to tell them what happened - and he was told that he didn't had to pay anything; it was called an 'act of God'.  What?  The insurance man explained - things like this happen sometimes, and it is considered an act of God.  A wind gust hit the door as he opened it, and unexpectedly pulled it out of his hand.  True, he couldn't PROVE that the wind gust had grabbed it, but it had been windy that day.  He wanted to make it right by reporting the incident, but since it was considered 'not his fault' - guess who got blamed?  God.

Think about it.  How many times do we blame God for things that aren't even HIS fault?  We blame Him for our childhood.  We blame Him for our parents.  We blame God for messing up our lives.  We put all the blame on Him when our jobs don't materialize or we run out of money or our children are 'all over the place'.  So many of us do not take responsibility for our part in what happens; it's much easier to ignore it happened, or blame God because He didn't do what we thought He should do.

We may question God, and that's normal.  In my teen years there was many times I cried out to God why He took my daddy away from us - and allowed the environment we were allowed to live in.  I still don't understand it - and I may never understand it.  But it is part of my life that shapes me on who I am today.  I could blame God for my childhood; I could blame God for my failed marriage; I could blame God my children turned out the way they did.  After all, I tried, didn't I?  I took my children to church.  I made sure they had head knowledge about God.  

But I have to take the responsibility that I didn't help them have heart knowledge of how wonderful God is, even when things are not what they should be.  Sometimes our childhood causes us to turn away from God, not believe in Him.  Sometimes we turn away because the world entices us and it's 'more fun' to do whatever we want, rather than choosing to follow God and be blessed more than we could ever imagine.  Immeasureably more.

Ephesians 3:20 (NIV)  "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us."

My youngest son shared a comment he gave to a pastor he spoke to recently.  He said "my parents made me go to church".   Personally, I still don't think that was a bad thing.  It is probably the best thing in his life.  Only it is easier to blame mom and dad for the way he has made choices that have messed up his life.  It's easier to blame the spouse because the credit card bill is high and there is no money to pay.  It's easier to blame the kids when arguments happen.  It's always easier to blame others - than take responsibility themselves that perhaps they made wrong choices.  They didn't take the spouse to a financial counselor to work out the bills.  They didn't discipline the kids but chose to let them do whatever they wanted - because they were 'forced' to go to church; so let's not bring God into the family life.

I have done a lot of things wrong, I admit.  I take responsibility for my failures.  I can't change the way things have turned out in my life; I have made those choices.  I can't change my spouse.  I can't change the way my children have turned out; we all are a product of our choices.  And we all learn from them - sometimes.  Sometimes it is easier to ignore the steps to take to make it better, and find it's easier to blame God.  You know what?  I'm going to reveal something to you.  In some instances... like our lives, for example, it is NOT God's fault we are the way we are.  We can try to blame Him all we want - but our lives are a result of the choices we have made - good and bad.

I am glad I found Jesus 'for real' about 38 years ago.  I wish I had known Him when I was a child.  Yes, I went to church every time the doors were open - back then it was Sunday mornings, Sunday evenings, Wednesday evenings - and when there was a revival - every.single.night.  But I had to make the choice to get to know Jesus personally... and I did that in my 30's.  I wasted a lot of time in not knowing Him personally.  I'm glad I sought after Jesus.  I know what my life would be like if I didn't have Jesus.  It would not be pretty.  It would be disastrous.  But God drew me to Him, and I've never looked back.  He has proven to me time and again, He is all I need.

Romans 8:28 (NIV)  "And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purposes."

God is always on our side.  When we are willing to give up those things that turn us away from Him, and turn to Him, we may not find a 'better' life with things going our way, but we will find the peace that comes from following Jesus.

John 16:33 (NKJV)  "These things I have spoken to you, that in me you will have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."

I can apologize that my mind has wandered some this morning (like it is an unusual thing), but I won't.  My prayer is that you will realize that Jesus loves you more than you can ever imagine.  His desire is to bless you, help you, lavish His love upon you.  All you have to do..... is ask.

Blessings!

We are scheduled for vacation!

 I probably should have checked my work calendar first - but didn't - after all, I am entitled to a vacation, right?  As long as I have PTO days, that is.  I'll put in for my time off this morning sometime.  I still need to put in my time for Jailbreak too.  I am so ready to getaway and have some 'down' time.

Hubby wanted me to get our vacation location scheduled and said it a few times yesterday so last night I got the computer out and went through some Airbnbs in the area I had mentioned to him before.  I found the one that I had showed him (it had a large tub in the master bath that I can't wait to soak in!) and a jacuzzi on the back porch.  I found a couple others that I thought could also work.  I narrowed it down to three and showed the pictures to hubby.  He went with the one I had showed him before.  We also discussed the days.... I wanted to limit it to 3 nights and 4 days... but he insisted on 5 nights and 6 days.  It's easier to give in - especially when he says he will pay for it.  So I began the process of reserving the house.  Yes, we get an entire house.  It's two bedroom because we wanted to have extra room to move in.  A one bedroom doesn't allow that much.  We went ahead and paid for our stay, our reservation was accepted, and we are ready to go.  It's nice to have a location set and now we can just look forward to the dates.  

Now my job is going to be thinking of menus and what food we will need.  I prefer to take our food rather than trying to find a store for what is needed.  Oh yeah.... I don't get a vacation from cooking.  But that's ok too.  Maybe I'll look for some crock-pot recipies to make so that I don't have a lot of preparation.  I love the smell of food cooking.   LOL  Which reminds me, I haven't had to cook the last two nights!  Hubby had the burrito bowl the other night.  He took me to lunch yesterday and we both had a salad.  I worked until nearly 5PM, then was talking to my little sissy for awhile.  When I came out, he wanted to look at the Airbnbs so it ws nearly 7PM and I started to get up to find something to fix - and he said he'd just fix the spaghetti TV dinner.  That worked for me!  I fixed myself half of a ham/cheese sandwich!  Thought about cooking fries in my air fryer, but decided I could do without them - I wasn't that hungry either.

This morning I have a dentist appointment and am dreading it.  Remember the silver fillings they used to put in our teeth?  Well, I'm told they are 'old' and need to be replaced.  Of course.  So today I will have two silver fillings removed and this other stuff put in.  In my mind it's 'why bother'?  It isn't bothering me.  I've had them probably 40 years.  But I've heard too how sometimes the silver in the teeth can cause problems.  I know years ago my older sister had all her silver fillings removed because - true or not - the doctor told her it was causing her rheumatoid arthritis.  After she had them removed, and received 3 gold injections, her RA went away.  That's why I don't understand why the RA came back and she has wallowed in it for several years now.  It's her excuse not to do anything.  She gets the infusions, she does the pain pills - and still chooses to lay in bed and let people wait on her.  I have a friend who has had RA for years too.  She works out every more very hard, or walks 6-10 miles in the mornings - and gets infusions - just so she can keep moving.  I guess it is one's priorities... choose to live or choose to let others wait on you.  I would never want to be like that.

My Fitbit just buzzed and said that it wasn't getting enough power to charge.  I checked the plugs and it's possible it may have been loose a bit.  I made sure the plug was in, took it off the charger and put it back on.  It seems to be fine now.

Makes me think abour our lives.  When our lives are not plugged in to our Power Source; when we don't keep our connections clean and plugged securely, we cannot charge or get recharged for life.  Our Power Source is Jesus.  When we keep our plugs secure and attached to Him, we have power to get through each and every day, regardless of what the devil throws at us.  Or the mistakes we make.  Or the weaknesses we give in to.  Jesus is our Power Source and He will give us all the power we need - providing we seek Him to get it.  We can't take it for granted; after awhile it will fade away as we move Him to the background.  But when we keep Jesus front and center, He will supply all that we need.  

Philippians 4:19 (NKJV)  "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

Jeremiah 29:13 (NKJV)  "And you will find me, when you search for me with all of your heart."

There is nothing better than seeking the One whom loves you the most, and ask Him to supply what you need.  Trust Him.  He loves you more than anyone else, and will supply all your need.  It may not be in your timeframe, but keep trusting.  He always provides the NEED (not always the want).

Take a moment and just think about all that you have.  Look about your room.  So.Much.Stuff.  (I'm talking to myself here).  He sometimes supplies all our wants too.  You probably didn't ask Him for it.  But what if there was something you really wanted?  A better marriage?  Children that would seek Jesus and live for Him?  A better job?  Retirement security?

What better way to seek it - than to seek Jesus first, and allow Him to meet your needs - and your wants.

It's all about Jesus first.  The rest falls into place.

Blessings!

A good surprise always makes things better.

 I went to bed before 9PM last night - my usual early to bed due to getting up so early.  I heard my phone ding as I was settling into the quiet mode, and as I keep my phone in the other room, didn't get up to check.  I am sure that in any emergency I will receive a phone call.  When I got up this morning, and woke up some, I checked my phone and yes, I had a good message.  It was a good surprise.  I had a text from my middle child that just said he wanted to say hi and I love you.  Now those are the kind of messages that make my day better.  

It's sorta like thinking of someone and dropping them a note vis 'snail mail' or sending a text or email, just to say, "hey, I was thinking of you....".  I used to write a lot of notes - mainly to family - but over the years just quit.  I rarely write a note anymore, but I have do have two people that have been sick that I have been trying to touch base ever couple of weeks to let them know I am praying for them and thinking of them.  I like to think it makes their day.  

And I got a surprise from hubby yesterday.  Yep.  Late afternoon he said he wanted to take me to dinner.  Now mind you, I had a bowl of chili for lunch and I was not hungry at all, and told him I wasn't hungry and that if we went some where I could get a small salad or soup was all I wanted.  When I got off work he told me that we didn't need to go out to eat if I wasn't hungry, that he would find something to eat.  I offered to fix him something, but he said he'd find something.  I mentioned there was a burrito bowl in the freezer and that's what he ended up eating.  I did snack on cheese and saltine crackers. :-)   That wasn't the surprise.  What was the surprise was that he commented later that he would like for me to find the best cabin in Pine that I liked, and he would pay for it, and we could get it on the calendar for vacation.  If you recall, I think I mentioned that I didn't want to make the reservation as it seems that when I do it, I end up paying for it.  I know I don't have time today during work as I have a full schedule, but perhaps this evening I can look them up again and find something.  I did find the one; perhaps it will still be available.  Yes, I'll let him pay for it.  He gets the vacation when we do that; I still get to get groceries and do the cooking.  And that is ok - I do enjoy cooking - and I enjoy saving money by doing so.

We watched a good movie last night.  He found it on Up Faith and Family, but I wonder if it would be on Netflix or another movie channel.  It's called Extraordinary and it is a true story about a man who runs extreme marathons.  Although I found it very interesting and was totally into the movie, I think hubby was snoring for about 20 minutes of it.  The man's name was Dr. David Horton.  And he felt that God had given him the talent to run.  And run he did.  The run that was highlighted was from Huntington Beach, CA to Central Park in New York - in 64 days.  Great movie, and if you can find it, I would definitely recommend it.  It's not a 'chick flick' or romance movie, but about real life. 

Hubby went to the doctor yesterday as a follow-up from his surgery.... but I'm pretty sure he was confused about the date.  His appointment was March 23, not February 23 - but since I wasn't there when it was scheduled, he said I was wrong.  He went, and they told him that their computers were messing up appointments because February and March days fall the same.  (I wonder if they were being kind or if that was true).  Anyway, he couldn't be seen yesterday and they did scheduled him earlier - around March 9 I think, although his appointment was March 23.  I know he had told me that doctor didn't want to see him until after he had the second surgery..... which won't be scheduled until possibly late March....or early April.  But, I wasn't there, he makes his own appointments, so I just let it go.  He is doing fine and has started driving again.  Scary, but he won't listen to anyone who suggests he stop.  I am sure that what he is afraid of is that he will be in a 'prison' (imagine that feeling - I know the feeling!) because not being able to go anywhere.

It makes one think about the older generation who are 'stuck' at home.  They are fairly healthy so the kids don't check on them much.  But they can't drive anymore.  No more going out to dinner with friends.  No more going to social events unless someone takes them.  I get it.  My heart breaks for them.  I can't imagine their loneliness if they don't have things to do.  

I'm grateful I love to read for then I can 'go anywhere'.  I can imagine myself in alps running down the mountain; on a cruise ship sailing out to sea with perfect weather; running a marathon and being a winner.... all I have to do is pick up a book and I am there.  Reading can take you anywhere, and when you don't read, you lose that imagination.  And I have other activities too - baking/cooking, sewing, crocheting/knitting.... I have lots to keep me busy if I choose.  If I ever get to quit work, I'll probably be doing a lot more of it - and walking/working out to strengthen my body.   Some day.

I found a bag of gingersnap cookies in the freezer yesterday that I had made for a friend for Christmas - and she had gone on a trip so I didn't send them.  I had to send her a message yesterday that I found them.... and was eating one of them.  I really ought to bag up a half dozen and send to her - but we agreed we will meet up in Mesa in March sometime and I can bring her some then.  I think by then though I may make them fresh so they would be nice and soft.

For Christmas from my middle child and his wife I received a small box that says on the outside "From God - For Women".  I try to read one every day to start my day off.  One side has a scripture; the other a note.  Here is today's that I read -

"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all".  Proverbs 31:29.   The other side reads: "In my heart, I'm holding you tight."

I love that.  I love that I know that God is holding me tight all the time, especially when I'm hurting, when I'm weary, and even when I'm joyful.  He is always with me, He never leaves me nor forsakes me.

And He is always with you, holding you tight.  He does, really.  Remember?  He holds you in the palm of His hand.  God loves you so much that He sent His One and Only Son to suffer and die for you.  In your place, for all your sins.  That is the greatest sacrifice.   I can't imagine giving up one of my sons as a sacrifice for everyone else.  But God, our Heavenly Father, did.  Jesus.  Jesus died, so that we can live.  

Love doesn't get bettter than that.

Blessings!

Love my time alone....

I got to stay home alone last night while hubby went to meet his friends for their Tuesday evening study. My daughter and I decided not to meet up so that left me at home.  I actually enjoy these times.  I can do what I want.  And that is always a good thing.  And I did what I wanted.  I watched "Heaven's War" on my Kindle Prime Video.  Interesting that I can bring it up on the TV Prime Video, but watched it on my Kindle.  And I didn't have to wear the ear plugs.  I was home alone, so could listen without them.  I crochet'd as I watched it and nearly have that blanket finished.  After the movie I chose to read some more, and was reading when hubby got home.  It was fun that I got to do what I wanted to do without interruption.

Sorta like why I love my alone time with God in the mornings.  It's just me and Him.  I read some, most days type something in here (even when I don't have anything to say), and spend my time talking with the One who loves me most.  I don't want to even imagine my day starting without taking some time to talk with Jesus.  He helps me sort out some things and reveals other things, and He always helps me get my feet back on solid ground.

I'm having trouble getting warm this morning and I blame it on my Wednesday pill.  It always gives me chills when I take it, and of course it makes my neck and head hurt, and wears me out.   By evening I am more than ready to go to bed.  I haven't been walking like I should (and Hubby hasn't gotten out to walk AT ALL since his surgery, although his doctor told him to!) but have gotten on my trampoline some during the day.  Not for great lengths of time, but some.  I can't wait for my treadmill to get moved in the back room.  Hoping it will be this next week I can get it moved into the house.  Then it will be easier to get on it throughout the day for even ten minutes at a time.  I'm supposed to be doing weight-bearing exercises too (talk about not doing what the doctor says!) and I have moved my weight bench out of here - and can't believe I haven't stopped to use it. I need to make a determination to start - and today will be a good day.  I don't like hubby watching me and offering suggestions that he doesn't use..... but today he has a doctor's appointment so maybe, just maybe, I can get back there.

I heard something in a message last night by Mario Murillo.  It was about the woman at the well and Jesus.  Jesus offered her 'living water' so that she would never thirst again.... and she starts off being more concerned that a Jew was talking to a Samaratian - a Jewish man and a Samaratian woman at that!  After more dialog (see John 4) Jesus tells her to go call her husband.  And this is where her shame comes out - with the words "I have no husband".  And Jesus tells her that she has had 5 husbands and the man she is living with her now is not her husband.  So she perceived he was a prophet, and decides to get the attention off herself (isn't that what we do when confronted with truth?) by telling Jesus we Samaratians worship here, but you Jews say that Jerusalem is where one should worship.

John 4:23-24 (NKJV)  "But the hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshippers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for the Father is seeking such to worship Him.  God is Spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth."

Then the woman comments that the Messiah - when He comes - will sort things out.... and Jesus tells her... "I am He".  

John 4:25-26 (NKJV)  "The woman said to Him, "I know the Messiah is coming" (who is called Christ). When He comes, He will tell us all things."   Jesus said to her, "I who speak to you am He".

And that changes everything.  If you look up John 4 in your Bible (or on BibleGateway.com), you will read that the woman went into the village and told everyone what Jesus had said to her, that instead of shaming her, He was giving her the Living Water of life.  And the town believed her and went to hear Jesus.

If you sat back in your chair right now and things came to your mind that you were ashamed about (they do have a way of creeping in - before we go into denial).... what would you do with those thoughts?  Would you push them aside and continue to carry them on your shoulders?  Words said that shouldn't have been, actions taken that you wish you had done differently..... so many things.  But you know what the good part it?

When those thoughts come to your mind, all you need to do is say "Jesus, please forgive me for doing such and such, forgive me for the things I've done.... and help me to live differently. Take control of my life and help me to live as You would want me to."  And you will feel such a peace come over you.  The burden of shame and anger will be lifted from your shoulders.  Then, if you need to make things right with someone, go to them and tell them that you are sorry.  They may or may not forgive you.  That's their choice.  But you need to do your part.  Get right with Jesus, and you too, can have that Living Water that refreshes and restores you.

Blessings!

Exhaustion..... soooo tired....

 That was how I was feeling last night.  Hubby wanted to watch a movie, but I told him no, I wanted to read.  I did get through a chapter, but then I could not keep my eyes open.  I closed them for a moment around 7PM.... and woke myself up snoring at 7:20PM!  Hubby told me to go to bed - but I told him it was too early.  I had fallen asleep for a deep ten minutes or so and was awake.  I read for about another hour then decided it was time for bed, thinking I was too awake and it would be awhile before I fell asleep.  Wrong.  I think I was asleep before hubby made it to bed!  AND, I slept deep all night.  I have no idea what caused my extreme tiredness, but when my Fitbit alarm went off at 4AM, I turned it off and snuggled back down to sleep.  About 4:20AM I heard hubby shuffling to the the bathroom - he must have awakened in the night and gone to sleep in his recliner.  He does that when his shoulder is hurting so badly he can't sleep and knows he will wake me up if he stays in bed.  I heard him shuffling so got up and came in here.  I'm feeling rested, but also feel like I'm catching a cold from snoring so deeply.  But, it could also be this crazy weather that is causing my sinus' to clog and dry.  I turned the humidifier on yesterday during the day in here just to bring some moisture into the room.  My hair is flying everywhere when I brush it; so dry in the air.

Yesterday was a busy day, but I still found some time to ponder our Jailbreak Getaway and where we will be going.... which got me to thinking about our anniversary getaway and what to do.  I finally had a talk with hubby last night and I think we will look at renting an Airbnb in Pine as they have some nice ones and the prices are not bad at all for a whole cabin.  As I thought about us going to Tennessee to stay at cabins near my nephew, I checked airlines as well as the cabins.  I'm not willing to spend that much for 3-4 days.  Hubby usually plans our anniversary getaway and pays for the hotel or where we stay out of the joint account.  I know him.... if I plan it, he will 'allow' me to pay for it.  I'm fine with staying home, and talked him into that last year with the thought we'd go to Tennessee this year.  But $1K for two airline tickets (Delta) threw a big wrench in the plans. Plus the cost of the cabins.  I just can't justify $3K for a 4 day vacation, no matter how nice it is.  Especially if it is an expense I will end up figuring out how to pay for it.

I showed hubby a nice Airbnb I saw in Pine that was only $173 a night - with a great view of the mountains and elk inthe back yard, plus a jacuzzi. And we can drive there.  He liked it.  I reminded him of my dental bill coming up quickly, plus he will have some dental work done within a few months.  I think I have him convinced Tennessee will need to be put on hold.  Wish it was close enough we could drive there.  But it isn't, so look for alternatives.

Our temperatures have turned chilly for a couple days so I'm thinking a pot of chili is in order for today.  I pulled the ground beef out of the freezer last night and I have enough beans and tomatoes, and juice, and pasta, to make a small pot.  There will still be enough for dinner or lunch tomorrow.  I love good chli on a cold day.  I do need more saltine crackers though.  They are my 'addiction'.  I love saltine crackers and can just sit and eat them 'dry' - or with peanut butter or chili piled upon them.  MMmm the thought of chili really does sound good!

The book I ordered about Revelations should be arriving today.  Nothing deep - it's just 40 days through Revelations and I figure that can give my sister and I something to discuss.  Of course we will also be reading the Bible through Revelations as we go.  I know I will be learning some things for although I have read through Revelations a few times, I haven't studied it.  There is a difference.  You read to learn about... but you study to learn why and what.  

My sister made a comment about Revelations that I hadn't thought about, although I know that I had read it.  There is a Bible study there at the park they are staying at in Florida that she plans to go to - and it is on Revelations.  A friend she has was refusing to go for various reasons of interpretations of Revelations.  Then she changed her mind.  Why?  Because of this verse:

Revelations 1:3 (NKJV)  "Blessed is he who reads and those who hear the words of this prophecy, and keep those things which are written in it; for the time is near."

The words 'Blessed is he who reads ..." got her attention.  We all want to be blessed.  So she has decided she may go and hear what is said.  When my sister told me about that verse, I realized I didn't remember reading it.  Blessed is he.... and here I have read Revelations, but haven't really thought about it.  I want to be blessed, so am glad that we are not only going to read it, but study it some too.  What about you?  You want to be blessed?  Maybe you ought to try reading Revelations as well!

Blessings!

Denial.... turn the light back on!

 My headache is finally gone, I think, and I hope it stays away.  It was a real pain to have.  Pun intended! 

I've read more this weekend than I have read in awhile and I must admit that I have enjoyed it.  I did crochet while we watched a movie last night, but other than that, it was reading.  And it felt good.  I know I've mentioned before I don't usually read fiction books, preferring cookbooks or self-help books.  By self- help I mean things that will help me grow spiritually.  Remember what I talked about yesterday and the Rapture?  Well, my little sissy and I talked yesterday and we both decided to purchase a couple books and do a study together on Revelations.  We can read a bit and talk it through.  She's more in to end times, as I've shared before.  I haven't been, I'm more interested in living right to get to the end times.  But it wouldn't hurt for me to delve into it and become more aware.  I do know the book I'm reading right now is really 'deep' and I'm not sure I understand it all, but I'm trying to finish it and not put it back down.  

Ah- my title today... Denial.  Juts realized that I was rambling and forgot about that title.  Let's see if I can write the scene as I read it in one of my devotionals this morning.   There was a reporter who was doing a series on exposing the dirtiness (is that a word?) of hotel rooms.  He had a black light and he would find a couple who would let them in their room and he would turn out the lights and turn that black light on.  Well, he found an unsuspecting couple on an anniverary getaway and asked to go up with them and shine the black light in their room. They agreed.  The arrive at the room, and the wife turns the lights on.  They all look at this pristine room, everything crisp and fresh and clean.  Then the lights went out and the reporter turned on his black light, and you could see stains everywhere - even on the carpet was a big stain!   The wife started yelling "turn the light back on! turn the light back on!"

And that's what we do.  We want the light turned back on so that we don't see what is hidden.  We want the light of relationships on so that we don't see the situations and emotions that need discussed and repaired.  We want the light of our lives to stay on, so that we don't see that the things we have done in the past have left big stains on our spouses, our children, our families, our homes.  We go into denial mode and refuse to see damages.  We want everything to be pristine and clean; everything in its place.  We don't want to see anything .... 

But not wanting to see it doesn't mean it isn't there.  

Sigmund Freud defined denial this way: a defense mechanism in which a person is faced with a fact that is too uncomfortable to accept, so they reject it despite overwhelming evidence.  Instead of brutal honesty, many of us choose denial.  When we are confronted with a reality that is so uncomfortable, so inconvenient, we choose to continue living in a false reality.

That's why a lot of people medicate their denial of life circumstances.  The truth is too uncomfortable so it's easier to pretend everything is ok.  For example - a simple thing - how many of us (I've done this too!), that when we get a bill in the mail and we don't have the money to pay for it.... we choose not to open the envelope?  We want to deny the bill.... and if we don't open it, we haven't actually received it - have we?  We throw it on the stack of other unpaid bills until there is no choice and we have to face reality... or the second delinquent bill comes in.  We want to deny the bill exists.

We try to deny the sins that stain our lives and pretend that they don't exist.  We medicate in different ways in that denial.  We think if we pour ourselves into our children, we can deny our marriage is bad; we think if we hide behind baggy clothes, we can deny we have put on too much weight.  Or lost too much weight.  We keep going shopping and taking trips with the pretense we have money in the bank, instead, we are making it worse.  We live in denial.

But as for our sins, there is hope.  When we confess our sins, the blood of Jesus is poured over us and all - not just one or two - all of our sins are washed away; covered and cleaned.

I John 1:9 (NKJV)  "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

I find it easier to confess my sins than deny them.  Sins hang around your neck and weigh you down.  Guilt clouds your thoughts and your actions.  You tell yourself that you will do better 'tomorrow'.  But that tomorrow doesn't come.  Things don't change.  The guilt becomes unbearable and at times, we forget it is there because we keep medicating it by continually denying it exists.  Our lives are miserable, and the lives of those around us are miserable.

Take a moment and just think where you are in life right now.  What is it that you have been denying to yourself - and to others?  Sometimes the reality is to painful to talk about so we deny the root and discuss the leaves that have grown.  Get to the root of it and confess to one another what the issue is, what is it that we keep denying.

Confess that sin and be washed clean.  You will feel so much better!  And you can face what is in front of you; sometimes it has to come down to just you and Jesus.  Then you can face the world.

Blessings.

Some weather happenings are going on somewhere!

 How do I know this?  Well, actually, it is a guess.  I have had a sinus headache going on for a few days now.  Last night was the worst, I think.  So much so that I couldn't sleep and about 11:30PM I got up and came into this room to try and sleep - and found myself tossing and turning most of the night.  I remembered this morning that I did buy some sinus headache medication a few weeks ago so got up and took two of them and I am finally starting to feel release.  Wish I had thought of them last night!  Yes, I had taken something yesterday, but it hadn't helped any.  I've heard that we are to get cold weather on Tuesday - or was that last week - so guess that is what is going on.

In all of that - I didn't sleep well last night, even here in the 2nd bedroom.  I could hear hubby shuffling down the hall a couple times during the night.  He doesn't sleep well at all anymore and is usually grumpy when he gets up.  This morning was no exception - especially when he discovered I came in here during the night.  "it is what it is".

We were going to try out the 9AM service this morning as the HOA is planning a 'greet your neighbor' thing at noon.... but I think we are staying home (because of my headache) from church.  I still need to figure out what to take.  Think I will take a run to the store and buy a can of baked beans.  I wanted to make banana pudding, but when I went to the store to get the big can of it the other day, they were out of it.  Not going that far today; will go see what I can find in a big can.  Perhaps nacho cheese and chips.  That sounds good too.  It will be a hamburger and hotdog type gathering... one said she'd bring potato salad, another a broccoli salad.  Trying to think of something that will go along with that.

Yesterday was a beautiful day and we sat out front for awhile.  I / we really didn't do much yesterday.  I worked on a puzzle for a few hours and made some progress.  Hubby worked on his message as he speaks next Sunday at the RV park - and we have to go to it!  We each have one time next month and then we are done for this season.  We are already on the calendar for next year at one, and expect to hear from the other within a couple weeks.  They called and asked what Sundays we could do - and it was easier to give them the ones we couldn't.   I need to start working on something for the one I have next month.  Hubby will probably use what he is doing this next week as it is at a different RV park.  

My little sister and I talked yesterday and we got to talking about the Rapture.  I know you've heard of it - and like me - think to yourself "well, I won't be here for that" - and that may be a true statement.  But no one knows when Jesus will return - and it could be today and you will be here.  So then what?

I Thessalonians 4:13-18 (NIV)  "Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope.  For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him.  According to the Lord's word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep.  For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first.  After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air.  And so we will be with the Lord forever.  Therefore encourage one another with these words."

Do you feel comforted that your grandparents who prayed for you, your parents who prayed for you, will be taken up to heaven even though they have died?  Their prayers for you live forever and they are still waiting, in some cases, for them to be answered so that you will rise with them to see Jesus when the Rapture comes.

I've read Revelations a couple times but have never dived into it to understand it better.  I've been wanting to get back into a Bible study so just might do it now.  Just to satisfy my curiosity.  Wish we still had Family Christian book store so I could browse; Barnes and Noble doesn't have much in Religion.  I checked Amazon last night, and will be checking Christian Book Distributors as well to see what is there.  I did find something about Revelations by Dr. John MacArthur and have it in my cart - I'm still thinking about that.  

A very good fiction book that I have read a couple times and love to read is called "The Bema".  It is a story about a man who....  you know what, I'd encourage you to read it yourself.  Download it; buy it; or if you know me, ask to borrow my copy.  It's an easy read, but deep and meaningful.  It is about the Rapture - although fiction.  Gives you something to think about.  In fact, I CHALLENGE you to read it.

In fact, I DOUBLE DARE you to read it!  I want you to start thinking about the future.  You may shrug and say "I don't care; I'm not going to change".... but for those who have gone before you, loving the Lord and praying diligently over you, would you read it for them?  Just for something to think about?

Hmmm. Just checked it on Amazon.  It's free on Kindle Unlimited; $31 if you buy it.  So I went to Thriftbooks.com and found it for $9.89 but they only had one copy.... so yes, I bought it.  It is that important that I'd want you to read it.  Have I gotten your curiosity up yet?  You won't be bored with it; it isn't full of religious stuff.  It's fiction.

Jesus loves us so much He gives us so many ways to find Him; to learn about Him.  Be informed.  Don't reject Jesus because you don't want to change the way you live.  There will come a time that you will want to know the truth.  Why?  Because the truth will set you free.

John 8:32 (NIV) "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

Blessings!

Regret or Repentance?

 I really haven't thought about that before... but there is a difference between regret and repentance.  When you confess something to someone, are you confessing because you regret it.... or because you repent from it?  That's an interesting thought, don't you think?  It's one that came up in a devotional I read this morning.

Remember Lance Armstrong?  Remember that for years he denied all the doping charges and he won - wasn't it 7 races?  Finally, the evidence stacked up enough that when he went on Oprah and she asked him if it was true, that he had been using body-enhancing drugs..... and he said yes.  For the whole world to hear.  Finally.  The beginning of the end of all he stood for.

But was his confession one of regret - for getting caught..... or was he repentant that he had done it?  Ah... that is the question, right?

When we get caught with our hand in the 'cookie jar' (however that may look), when we say "I'm sorry", are we sorry we got caught.... or are we sorry becaues we did wrong (when we were told to stay OUT of the cookie jar?)?

It has gotten easier sometimes to just say "I'm sorry" and think that will satisfy the one to whom we are saying it to.  A spouse, a child, a friend.  We say "I'm sorry" when we have hurt someone.  We say "I'm sorry" when we misunderstand someone.  There are different ways we say "I'm sorry".

When was the last time you told God "I'm sorry", and meant it?  

The slang some have used over the years of "sorry, not sorry" just came to mind.  What exactly does that mean?  I'm sorry I got caught but not sorry I did it?  I'm sorry I hurt you, but I'm not sorry because I feel justified in what I did?  I'm sorry you don't like my behavior or something I said, but I'm not sorry because I don't really care what you think.

Does that make you stop and think this morning?  When was the last time you said "I'm sorry" - and meant it?  When was the last time you truly regretted doing something?  When was the last time you confessed and repented of something you did?

When was the last time you were honest with yourself?

Hebrews 4:13  "Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight.  Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account."   

Guess what makes me think twice (sometimes) before I do something?  You have heard about all those clouds of witnesses up in heaven who watch over you?

Hebrews 12:1 (NIV) "Therefore, since we are surround by such a great crowd of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us."

That means, in some cases, mom or dad is watching you.  Grandma and Grandpa who prayed so diligently for you is watching you.  People you admire and love and respect, are watching you.  And I think about my daddy and my grandparents watching me and the things I do and the things I say.... and I admit, sometimes I am ashamed that they would see that in me.  When I think about them - let alone Jesus watching me! - I am truly repentant.... but sometimes I find myself doing it all over again.  Words can say repentant, but until it is in the heart and mind, it is difficult for repentance to truly come.  

I do know that I don't want people watching me when I do something I shouldn't.  I mean, I sneak (I truly do!) into our cookie jar at times because I don't want hubby's eyes watching me and his mouth commenting on it.  I'm over 21, I don't need permission to get in the cookie jar!  I have to hide sometimes when I want a piece of candy.  I don't like being watched!

So with this great crowd of witnesses watching me (they don't care I eat that cookie!!), I am more conscious of what things I choose to do.  I try to be kinder, truthful, and obedient.  I may say things that others don't want to hear, but if they are truth, they need to hear them.  Disappointment in people happens, but that is because we are human.  I don't believe that God is disappointed in us for not following Him, He is sorrowful because He knows that He can bless us beyond all imagination when we give our lives to Him.  He will give us clarity of mind, He will direct our paths, He will keep us in the palm of His hand.  Our name is already written there.  The Bible says so.  And I choose to believe that if God said it in His Word, then it is true.

Isaiah 49:15-16 (NIV)  "Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne?  Though she may forget, I will not forget you!  See, I have engraved  you on the palm of my hands; your walls are ever before me."

Think about your plans for today.... will they be things you will be regetting by end of day?  Will you feel a need for repentance of what you've done or said?    Or will you be able to say "It is well with my soul".

Who is watching you?  In life, it is our children, our families, our friends.  In heaven, it is those who love us and have gone before us.  

Blessings!

Doing the 'Friday dance'!

 In spite of the fact this has been 'only' a four day work week with being off on Monday, this week has been crazy busy and stressful.  Of course Monday was hubby's surgery and it was a day of extreme waiting and exhaustion. Tuesday was busy, and recovery was happening.  Full focus back on Wednesday, and yesterday was broken up by having to take hubby to the doctor's appointment.  THAT took all afternoon.  But we did stop at Olive Garden to use a gift card that was burning a hole in his pocket on the way home.  Dinner at 3:30PM - that works.  We even paid $5 each for the extra food to take home.  I like that.  Guess what's for dinner tonight!  Spaghetti.  And I thawed out some chicken earlier so will put in the air fryer and we'll have chicken with our spaghetti tonight.  Dinner is complete.

I jumped on the computer when we got home and had 37 messages - which took me over an hour to get through, schedule meetings, etc.  I think it was after 6:30PM before I turned the computer off.  My boss was still online - what's up with that? - sure hope it wasn't to find me more work!  I did email her a couple times but she didn't respond so guess she was involved in a project.  Probably learning stupid timecards.  I mean, learning timecards.  sigh.  Got to focus on that today.  I've decided that I have to learn it, so I may as well become an expert on it.

Can't think of anything we have planned for the weekend.  Want to check with a grandson with an upcoming birthday to see when we can take him out to dinner.  We love spending time with him and catching up.  Yeah, hope to get him taken out one evening soon.

I read in my devotional this morning about Naaman.  Remember him?  He's the military guy who had leprosy and the Israeli servant girl he had captured told him to go see Elisha, a prophet of God.  So he did.  He also took 10 sets of clothes, lots of coins, gold and silver, animals, and I don't know what all.  (cause I didn't go back to the story)  

Interesting.... the heading of the devotional for today is 'Willing to Listen'.  Are any of us willing to listen to others?  I like Proverbs 12:15...

Proverbs 12:15  "The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice."

Have you ever had a time when something someone said 'flipped a switch' in your mind and you go "dang!  I never thought of it like that!"  A switch gets flipped and everything makes sense.  You do it and you succeed in your task.  That's like Naaman.  In 2 Kings 5, it tells the story.  Stop and go read it.  

There was no cure for leprosy (still isn't, that I'm aware of).  Yet, once the Israelite servant girl told him to see Elisha, Naaman grasped at a straw and went.  He took all that 'stuff', expecting to buy his healing from Elisha - but Elisha didn't even come out to see him!  Sent his servant to talk to Naaman - the commander of an army!  Naaman was not happy.  He stated what he wanted, Elisha's servant told him what Elisha told him to do - "go wash in the Jordan River 7 times and ou will be healed."  Naaman was offended!  The Jordan River was dirty!  He wasn't going to do it.  But then what happened?

Another servant went to Naaman and asked him (paraphrased) "why don't you do as Elisha said?  It's such a simple thing, and you will be healed."   So again Naaman listened to his servant and went and washed 7 times in the Jordan River as instructed by Elisha...... and on the 7th washing, he was healed.  His eyes were opened when he decided to listen to what his servants had told him; what Elisha had told him, even when he didn't want to hear it.

We always think that our grass is greener on the other side.  That the advice we are given isn't good for us - unless it is what we want to hear.  Sometimes we refuse and shut our ears to hear advice from those we don't want advice from.  I get it.  Guilty.  That's me!  Unless the advice confirms what I want to do - usually I don't want to listen to it.

But sometimes we need to.  Sometimes we need to hear what others say and follow it.  It is kind of like a doctor telling you 'You need to lose weight' and we think in our minds, 'Yeah, I know I do, but I don't want to deprive myself of what will help me do that'.  So we reject the words of the doctor who is trying to help us feel better and to live a long life.  What if we don't want to live a long life?  You are only hurting yourself because you will leave a tangled emotional mess if that is what you think.  Grandchildren deprived, children deprived, memories not made.  Oh yes, when we don't follow good advice, it affects everyone around us.

But then you get my age and you wonder would anyone even care.  And yet, I know some will.  Actually, I think most will, but emotions get held in.  I always laugh and say the statement I heard from someone or read somewhere years ago - "I want to live long enough to let my children ...." I forget the rest of it.  I do not want to be a burden on my children.  I want to live a long healthy life and then die in my sleep.  I don't want extreme medical bills at the end (which is one reason I'm having to pay out a high dental bill now - if that root becomes infected it will affect my entire jaw and then, and then... sigh.  Catch 22, right?)

But sometimes people come in to our lives like Naaman's servants and tells us that we should...."      " - whatever it is.  Maybe it's time we stop and hear what they say.   It may just be the switch that flips the light inside of us.

In the meantime,  it's Friday, and I'm grateful.  

Do the Friday dance.

Blessings!

What can one do about heartache?

Ah, the erase button is getting used this morning!  Heartache.  We all have it; usually it is caused by others doing things that make no sense but hurts themselves and others.  As a mother and grandmother, I have had my share of heartache.  Now I realize all that my own mother went through.  And the sad part?  We can't really share those heartaches with others because we don't want others to feel sorry for us, nor do we want their pity.  Ah... enough of heartaches.  I am so grateful I have God to run to.  He is the One who understands my heartache and my fears and all the unknown that runs through my mind.  He is the One in Whom I can lean into, trust to hold my thoughts captive, and help me through painful times.

Some of you can understand exactly what I'm talking about because you may have experienced some of that in your own life.  We can all agree, life is hard sometimes.  Especially when it doesn't turn out the way we dreamed it would.  People we love die, children rebel, grandchildren do their own thing.  And what do we do?  We buried the emotions inside (well, some of us do), and we sit back, watch, and pray.  And that is what I choose to do.

I wish things were different.  I wish life hadn't taken the turns that it did.  I wish everyone could be happy and love each other.  I wish.... ahhhh.... so many of those wishes I have buried within me and no one will ever know.  I may have written some over the years... but which journal?  Cyberspace has some of my thoughts.... hopefully no one will find them until after I pass on.

Back to reality.... hubby is doing well.  He started to feel some twinges yeserday as the numbness wears off.  He slept a little more yesterday.  But he did do the laundry.  A friend of his stopped by to visit and brought donuts.  Today he has his regular doctor's appointment to hear results of his physical the other week and I have to drive him.  Messes up my plans... I had scheduled a facial at noon today.  Cancelled it and rescheduled.  That's ok.  I may have to cancel it again... I didn't check the calendar.  I will this morning.  So other than working, that's it for a Thursday.

I am missing the little breaks I get when hubby leaves to go somewhere.  He won't let me work in the back room I'm trying to fix up as an exercise room.  He is refusing to let me get rid of a desk back there - says I'm getting rid of too much stuff.  (seriously!)  I don't use this desk, it is a 'catch all'.  But, now I have to find a place to put it.  But I can't move anything until he is out of the house.  AND he's having the cleaning people come this week instead of next so I will have to pull up the rubber matts that I was putting together to put the treadmill on so that they can sweep the floor.  Backtracking what I've managed to sneak and do while he was asleep.

I finished the (Un)qualified book by Steven Furtick that I started earlier this week.  It was very good, actually.  I know I am unqualified to do a lot of things, but God always 'qualifies' what needs to be done. 

A friend of my sister's is struggling with her two younger children.  She and her husband adopted several children, but these were the two youngest - and were under 10 when he died of brain cancer.  He fought hard, but lost.  Two days before he died, their new house was hit by a tornado (the only one on that street) and demolished.  The contractor has been taking his time and two years later the house is still not finished.  And the wife misses her husband terribly.  Now the two youngest children, who barely knew their adopted father, have become rebellious.  The one is now 9, I think, and says she doesn't believe in God anymore because He let her daddy die.  The youngest, around 6 or 7, has become so rebellious the mother cannot homeschool him anymore and has put him in school in which he is causing major problems.  This defenseless mother is broken.  She misses her husband, she's trying to raise their children (I think there were six total), she is trying to get their home fixed, and she keeps leaning into God to help her, and He does, but life gets really hard.  I cannot fathom the pain and heartache she is going through.  

And I think of my own mother, whose husband died at age 39, leaving her with 6 children ranging in ages 16 through 1.  My mother had told me how much she and my daddy had loved each other.  I truly wish she had never remarried.... but she felt she needed someone to help her with the children.  I would rather have had a hard life than go through what we had to go through.

I've often thought of the story of Joseph in the Bible.  Moreso because it seems that no matter what I'm reading, a reference is made about Joseph.  Why Joseph?  Because he was favored by his father, and the jealousy of his brothers threw him into a pit and then sold him as a slave.  But do you see God's hand in this story, in spite of the fear and heartache Joseph had to have felt?  Joseph turned to God and held on to Him in spite of his life.  He worked in a home and was accused of attempted rape, thrown in prison, made friends with the baker and cup-bearer, and he gives them the meaning of a couple dreams - and then one is beheaded and the other forgets all about him!  Finally the Pharaoh has a dream and the cup-bearer remembers him and Joseph is brought out to reveal the dream to Pharaoh.  Then Joseph is made 2nd in the kingdom of Egypt.  Could you even imagine!  Years more pass and his brothers come from Caanan to buy food.  He recognizes them.  Oh he could have gotten revenge!  But he doesn't.  Over the course of time, he reveals himself to them and weeps over them, forgiving them for selling him into slavery.  How could Joseph do that?  How could he forgive those brothers for what they did to him?

Easily.  Because he saw God's hand upon himself, that he would be used to save the nation of Israel - a remnant that would move to Egypt and grow to be a large nation.  And when his father, Jacob, died, they took him back and buried him in the land God had given to Jacob and his people.  When Joseph died, and Moses finally was able to take Israel out of the land of Egypt back to the Promised Land from God, they carried Joseph's bones with them, that they would be buried in the land.  It's a great true story.  Joseph never gave up on God.  He said that God allowed what happened so that Joseph could save the children of Israel (Jacob).

Our lives are not as complicated as Joseph's was, but we all have been through some tough times, some tough fires, some tough heartaches.  Yet, God is always with us, no matter how we medicate the pain, no matter what we do.  God IS, not was.  And God still takes what we go through to work through life so that we can be a blessing to others.  We may not see it now, we may not see how our lives affect out children and grandchildren, our spouses, and even our friends.  But God will take our lives and use it.  How I don't know, but it's good to know that He can use unqualified people, even people like me.  And unqualified people like you.

Take a moment and think about where your life is today.  Are you happy?  Are you satisifed with where you are?  How are you influencing those around you?  Do you make a difference in their lives?

Sometimes I feel useless, a waste of space.  Truly.  And yet, sometimes I will get an email, or a note, or a phone call, and all it says is 'thanks for being there'.... and I know that God has taken something made of dirt and blessed someone. And He does that for you too.

Take a moment and bless someone today.  Do the laundry, wash the dishes, pick up the toys.... bless your spouse just by doing the little things.  God can use you too.

Blessings!

Home

 and sometimes there is nothing like it.  Hubby got to come home yesterday from the hospital and is doing very well, I think.  No pain and is seeming to move about quite freely.  The human body is interesting, for sure.  It will be interesting to see if he has any pain today as all the numbness should be wearing off.  It was a crazy unusual busy day yesterday.  I tried to work, but took off about 11:30AM to go to the hospital.  I was needing to get away from the computer.  I walked in his room to find out he had been discharged, so turned around and went to get the car.  But I had a stop first.  I smelled fresh coffee when I walked into the lobby to leave.... Starbucks was there.  So stood in line to get a cup for hubby and I.  He was downstairs before I got the coffee, but waiting (not that there was a choice) until I got outside, got the car, and pulled up front.  Had a couple stops on the way home - prescription and of course lunch!  Did a quick run-through at Taco Bell - believe it or not!  Once back home, he went to his computer and I went back to mine - only mine was to work.  Had a lot to do yesterday and still do today.  I had to make another run back to the hospital in the afternoon; he got a telephone call... he left his hearing aid box and one hearing aid mixed in the sheets of his bed.  So back we went.  

I don't know about hubby, but I slept good last night for the most part.  I didn't want to get up this morning, that's for sure.  I am really longing for a few days away somewhere, but right now it isn't possible.  I just need to get away, but to where I can be alone, and just be with God.  Some days one just needs Him to set the world right and let the clutter of life get out of the picture.  I'm tired; so very tired, and I see nothing in the near future that can help.  Oh yeah - we do need to get starting planning our Jailbreak Getaway this year.

"All my life You have been faithful, All my life You have been good, so good!  With every breath that I am able, I will sing of the goodness of God."

That song has been going through my mind this morning.  Have you ever stopped to think about how good God is?  Even when you choose not to accept Him or His ways, He is good to you.  He answers the prayers of others for you, even when you don't acknowledge it.  He even answers your prayers, although they may be only thoughts, or hopes or even dreams, for you.  Heaven forbid that you would pray for something!  Just kidding - our prayers are that you WOULD seek God for something!

This year is truly a year of things going on.  A granddaughter gets married, and we have not one, but two (that we are aware of) great-grandbabies on the way from another granddaughter and a fiancee of a grandson.  I love babies, but my heart breaks for these two because of the circumstances.  Both have such a hard life ahead of them.  I know I've touched on 'babies having babies' before.  I can't even help much which is very difficult.  I pray for both, that they will realize that they have a treasured life inside of them growing, and that they will love this baby and care for it as a parent should.  It won't be a 'flour baby' as they used to give at high school.  This one will be real, and it pees and poops and wants a bottle, and wants to be loved.  I pray they will give it all it needs.  And ask for help when they can't.

A granddaughter has posted her wedding photos on facebook.... I just happened to see the popup link when I signed on the computer this morning, so took a quick look through them.  The wedding was beautiful and the photos reflect that.  I'm sure there are more photos, but these look great.  It was a joyful occasion, for sure.  

I wonder, as we look through the photos of our lives - as far back as we can remember - what do we see?  Do we see all the joyful, beautiful times of life, laughter, and love?  Or do we just remember the bad and difficult and painful times?  I've tried to push the dark times away and have pretty much succeeded, I think.  I can't change the past, but how I deal with the future, is a result of that past.  But I choose not to allow the past to continue to live.  It's done.  I can't change it.  I can just work on making the future better.

I've made a lot of mistakes over the years.  There are some years that I'd like to erase completely.  But it is in those years that I grew.  And so do you.  We all have painful stuff in our past that we'd like to get rid of - all we want to remember is the joyful and happy times.  And we do need to hang on to those.  Sometimes those thoughts are what sustain us.

One thing for sure - in all my years, even before I truly KNEW Jesus, He was faithful to me.  That song still resonates:  "Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so.  Little ones to Him belong, They are weak, but He is strong.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me.  Yes, Jesus loves me, the Bible tells me so."  I love Chris Tomlin's song "He loves me".  

Sing it a few times in your head this morning.... reflect on it, and His faithfulness to you all these years.  You may not acknowledge Him, but He's there.  Why?  Because others have prayed for you.  Not just your mama, but your spouse, your children, your friends.  Jesus is there, and He's waiting for you to sit down and talk with Him.  Will you?

Blessings!

It's over, and all is well...

It turns out that we were both wrong.  We arrived at the hospital a little before 9AM and went up to the waiting room, where they came fairly soon and got hubby.  I never saw him again until after the surgery later that afternoon.  When the doctor finished, he came to see me in the waiting room to tell me what all he did.  After 2.5 hours in surgery (I really like the system they have; they give us a number and we can watch a color coded screen.  As they move into surgery, (yellow) into closing (purple), into recovery (green) the colors change with their number on a screen so all day long I can see  what was going on), he was moved into the recovery room.  Dr. Smith (yes, his real name), said that he only did the surgery on the left abdomen.  He got interrupted a couple times with phone calls so his information, though I'm sure complete, was broken up.  He said that the veins in the abdomen were 'all over the place' (what does that mean?) and they ended up doing 8 stents to fix that one aneurysm.  They were not going to do surgery on the aneurysm on the right side of the abdomen because it is 2cm and they don't need to unless they are at 4cm, which is what the one behind the left knee is at.  That surgery will be scheduled sometime in March, I think.  He said hubby did well, was doing well.  About an hour or so later he was finally moved to his room as he was to stay overnight.  I finally was allowed to see him then and found my way up to his room.  He was wide awake - and hungry!  LOL  He had to continue to lay flat for two more hours - which I think were the most agonizing hours for him.  He wasn't to move about, and had to lay still.  I placed the order for his dinner about 6:15PM as it would take about 45 - 60 minutes to get it to him.  I left about 6:30PM to come home as I was exhausted.  I hadn't eaten all day and my eyes were burning from lack of sleep the night before.  I'm sure he was glad to get to move when the time came, and to get his food.  

I need to catch up on work this morning, and because we know he will be coming home today, I will stay home until time for him to be picked up, then I will head over to do that.  I didn't sleep well last night - and because I WAS home alone, awake at 10:30PM I turned the light on and read some in a book before trying to go back to sleep.  And, of course I was awakened early this morning as I usually am to come do my quiet time.  I want to go back to sleep, but I do need to catch up on the work emails.  Have a lot to do today.  NOT looking forward to it.  

As of last night, hubby is doing fine from his surgery.  I thank God for taking care of him and watching over him.  Once he gets back home, life will begin to get back to normal for awhile.

I'm reading a good book by Steven Furtick called (Un)qualified.   It reminded me somewhat of the message Sunday and the labels we put on ourselves and on others.  Especially others.  But the book talks about the labels we put on ourselves.  For example, how would you finish this sentence - what would be the third word?  

I am .....................  

How would you define yourself?  I am 'pretty'?  I am 'smart'?  I am '..................'  - what would you make that third word?

How does that word define you and how does it line up with God's Word for you?  I'm only in the 3rd - or 4th chapter and it was pretty late last night and I was pretty tired when I read it - but it really gave me something to think about.  Do I call myself what God calls me?

If you will go to Ephesians (it's a fairly short book - easy read) - you will read all the 'labels' that God calls you.  Personally, I like the 'I am ...........' that God calls me rather than what I tend to call myself.  Look them up.  I bet you will like these words better too.

I John 4:10  (NKJV)  "In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be propitiation for our sins."

Ephesians... I am Blessed, I am Chosen..... keep looking, you can find them!

Blessings!

It's today. Not just Valentine's Day....

 Today is surgery day.  It always seems like it was so far in the future, so far away, but time has passed quickly by at its own pace, and today ist he day for hubby's surgery.  My thoughts have been all over the place last night... full of 'what if' and uncertainty.  Why is that?  Because yesterday, it seemed more than a little more than usual, the reality he is 84 years old and he seemed more confused at times.   Perhaps it is because he is so afraid of the surgery.  We did go to church yesterday and saw some friends there.  Hubby asked one friend to pray for him so she annointed him and prayed over him.  When she asked him specifically what surgery he was to have... well, it could have changed as I haven't been in contact with the doctor... but when I was in the doctor's office last October, it was the aneurysm in the left abdomen and the one behind the left knee today..... and the next surgery will be the aneurysm in the right side of the aneurysm.  He told our friend that it was just the one behind his knee.  I didn't correct him because it could have changed.  I asked him about it later and he admitted he may have gotten confused, but thought the doctor had just said the knee.  I guess I will find out when the doctor comes in to check on him before surgery.  I hope I have the opportunity to ask!  I did take today off work and anticipate being in the hospital all day.  If I recall correctly, the surgery can take 4-6 hours.  Just the sound of that is scary.  I'm taking my crochet and a book to read.  We are to be there around 9AM and surgery isn't until 11AM.  It will be late afternoon before we know anything.  All prayers are appreciated.

As I mentioned above, we did go to church yesterday to the place we wanted to check out.  Bluntly, it was wild and crazy.  Of course we are 'old' so it would seem so to us.  We are used to order.  The band was loud, but we knew most of the songs.  The pastor's wife spoke and if her words were running a race - they won.  She talks reallllly fast.  But it was a good message and I at least brought some of it home with me.  Things like....Don't put labels of the past on people.  Just because they lied yesterday, don't call them a liar today.  Instead encourage them to speak truth.  Just because they were lazy yesterday don't call them lazy today; speak into them to encourage them to do something productive.  They may have been an alcoholic yesterday, but today is a new day and give them the encouragement to be one who chooses carefully what he drinks.  He may be accident prone, or a drama queen, or .... we shouldn't call them what they were before.... but call them who they can be.

Words like....My child is one who keeps their room clean.  My daughter is a great cook.  My wife makes our house a home.  My husband is always attentive to me.  My parents are fun to be around.  My mom makes me feel loved.  My dad is always there for me.  My friend is ..... There are so many positives that we can label people with rather than what they WERE.  I certainly do not want Jesus to call me by what I was.  Today He calls me His beloved, His child.  I would rather be that, than what I was before.

When we meet Jesus, our name changes.  We are loved, rather than unloved.  We are beautiful, rather than ugly.  Jesus changes everything.  When you encounter Jesus.... life changes.  Our perspective, our behavior, our attitudes.  Jesus changes everything.

Think about it.  Wanna change?  Try Jesus.

Sometimes it comes early.....

 When hubby brought my coffee to me this morning he also handed me a Valentine card.  Inside was a gift card for Amazon and a very nice note from him.  He really does try to please me.  He knows that I will spend the Amazon card - it may not all be on me, but I use it for whatever I want - and it means that it doesn't come out of my checking account.  That's always a good thing.  I haven't bought/created him a card yet.... I have an account at Blue Mountain so can create a card from there - which has been my intent all along.  I can print it and make an envelope to put it in - or just give it to him.  I suppose I will do it later today since tomorrow he will be at the hospital.  His gift was ordered a couple weeks ago but has not arrived yet.  He knows what it is; just doesn't 'know' it is also his Valentine's day gift.  Yes, that was my plan when I ordered it.

Today is Sunday and we do plan to plysically go to the church we have been discussing to experience their worship.  I say it that way because worship isn't just the music, which is what most people say it is.  Worship is the entire service - giving all glory and honor to God.  I must admit I'm apprehensive about he message - if that is right word.  What I heard on the computer hasn't been one that would draw me to that church.  However, with that being said, my friends who go there say that to really 'hear' the message, one must attend in person.  So that is what we are going to do this morning.  We still listen to Jentezen Franklin and other messages online so are still getting the Word in us.  I'm really praying and hoping that we both will feel drawn to attend; I miss the fellowship of other believers.  Being in person is much better than listening online.  Even though I do have to get dressed to go.... don't think they'd appreciate my pajamas and footies.

I started cleaning my bookcase in this room yesterday - not intentionally.  And not completely.  A grandson signed up for Ancestry.com and it came up that I was his 'close relative'.  That always cracks me up but am glad it is in our DNA or genes or whatever it is.  (Another grandson signed up and it came up I was his mother!)  I emailed him the family tree I have of my mother's side.  I have started to update it a few times right now my 'line' but never finish it.  I really should do that.  Or at least pull out 'my side' of the family line.  But what started the 'cleaning' was my search for a typed copy that I had received years ago.  I know I have the 'original' somewhere, but cannot find it.  I did find - after going through several cabinets and boxes out in the garage - a copy.  It goes back to the 1400's.  And it covers my grandmother, not so much my grandfather, which is what the emailed copy is. Two different people worked on it.  I scanned that document into my computer and emailed it to the grandson as well. Which reminds me, I need to find that email and save that document to this computer, versus just leaving it in an email.

As I was searching for that document, I cleaned off the bottom two shelves of this bookcase.  Found I had lots of spiral notebooks that are blank.  Found some journals I had written in.  Anyway, straightened it up - especially after finding 'tons' of papers that I had brought home from the office in 2019, when I was sent home to work, thinking I might need them... well, they are in the trash.  I haven't used them in two years so figure everything has changed since then.  Made that bottom shelf look better; plus I took about 8 books to the bookcase in the other room.  And brought back two that I wanted to re-read off of one of those shelves.  :-)  

I started reading in the book of John this morning in my Bible.  I love the book of John.  John was the beloved disciple of Jesus - but did you know he never identified his name in the book of John until the next to the last verse!  John was in the 'inner circle' of three with Jesus.  (Peter and James were the other two)  John had a very special relationship with Jesus.  Yes, Jesus loved all His disciples (and us!), but just like we connect - or love - each of our children, sometimes we have a special relationship that connects us with each one in a different way.  One may be because they are so loving and caring to us.  Another we may 'love more' because we have a lot of the same interests.  And yet, another you may love more just because..... for any reason.  I have a unique relationship with each of my children.... whether they know it or feel it - or not.  But I love each one of them .... with all my heart .... but sometimes it is differently.  And I love each one more.  And I love each one the same.  Just like you do.  It isn't about 'favorites' - although even my siblings played that game growing up ("I'm mom's favorite!")... and yet, they all knew that I was the favorite. :-)

We often say the book of John is about love.  And it is.  John loved Jesus, and he was the 'beloved disciple'.  He shows in this letter that Jesus is all about love.  Just as we should be.  Sometimes when a person chooses to follow Jesus they think they must start in Genesis and read the Bible all the way through.  That's old stuff.  Yes, it is still vital to know and I am reading through the Old Testament in the evenings.  But I love the New Testament because it is about Jesus.  The New Testament shows us how to live as a 'Jesus follower'.  The book of John teaches us how to love like Jesus loved.  I also like the book of Philippians because it encourages me to have 'Joy' in my life, regardless of my circumstances.  Sometimes I have to read it frequently as a reminder.  Paul, who wrote Philippians, was in prison when he wrote that letter to the church at Philippi - and encouraged and exhorted believers to have joy in all of their circumstances.  If they were being persecuted, be joyful, because you are a follower of Jesus.  If you have plenty, be joyful, for the Lord has provided for you abundantly.  If you are in need, be joyful, for the Lord is all you need and will be your Provider.

I can remember a time when we had nothing... to the point I had to learn to cook from scratch because if I didn't, I didn't know what we could eat.  When we grow up we are used to having hamburger, bread, etc. because our parents always supplied it.  But when you are away from them and have your own family - it's like - 'what do I do now?'  I learned how to make homemade noodles for 'chicken and noodles'.  I learned how to make many dishes - some just by experimenting, most by using a cookbook.  I learned how to make homemade tortillas... and I kid you not, even though it is much easier to just buy a package (and a lot less messy) of tortillas to put our taco food in, the taste is much better when you make your own.  I still make my own at times - but not always.  But God provided.  He put that desire in my heart to take what we had, and make it into something we could eat.

My sister has told me frequently that I am the cook of the family.  It is because I had to learn how to cook to provide food my family would eat.  I love cookbooks and love finding new recipes to try.  I have my favorites - not always hubby's favorite.  But they filled the belly.  I like bringing colors together.  It always makes it look more appealing.  For example, last night I grilled a steak and divided it between hubby and I ... then fixed green beans with it, sliced tomatoes, cut up a cucumber, and fixed some kiwi to go along with it.  So we had brown, green, red, and two other shades of green.  Ok - it was still all good.  I love to cook - especially if it is for others.

Take joy in all that you do.  Sometimes we think what we do is mundane, but if we change our perspective of it, we will find that well, maybe it isn't so bad.  Find your joy in life.

Blessings on your day!

It was too early...and yet...

 I struggled out of bed around 3:20AM this morning becaues I could sleep no longer.  Hubby was snoring and although I had been awake for awhile (I'm sure I was dozing, at least lightly) I could not get back into a deep sleep.  I tried to go back to sleep here in my room, my eyes were glued shut, but the 'dreams' that flowed in and out of my mind were weird and odd. The wind is blowing and our metal flag against the house is banging against it. (I am going to find a place to move that metal flag!)  I hear hubby get up around 4:30AM I think, and so I turn my light on.  I'm still struggling to get my eyes open.  My arms feel like they are dead weight, that they are asleep.  I finally move enough that my arms regain feeling and my eyes open.  What in the world is going on with me?!

Hubby brings my coffee in and tells me he made a pot of coffee this morning and not just the k-cup.  That means I have two cups of coffee in my cup.  One cup doesn't always last long, and this morning I obviously need that extra cup right now.  I have a feeling we may go out to breakfast this morning - and if we do so, I will have a few more cups of coffee as well!

Oh my goodness, I'm already starting to erase things I'm writing.  I hope I can finish this one today and not throw into draft mode like I did one day last week!  Three times I tried to write but nothing seemed to flow.  It was an outlet, I guess, and I didn't want to post it.

Hubby's surgery is Monday morning and he is getting anxious.  His fears were somewhat relieved yesterday as he went to the hospital to do the preliminary work and they went ahead and had him complete the paperwork he would need to fill out.  All except one paper that needs to be signed on Monday morning.  They drew 5 vials of blood and he had to do a urine sample and get an EKG too.  Interesting.  All for vascular surgery to fix a couple aneurysms.  This surgery is for the aneurysm on the left side of the abdomen and the one behind his left knee.  He said he felt relieved when he was able to talk to the people at the hospital and get all this part taken care of.   If I recall correctly, they said that the surgery will take several hours so I plan to take a couple crochet projects to work on while there.  Of course I took the day off work so that I can be there all day.  He will be staying overnight; although I plan to work the next day, I can take off to go pick him up.

I actually got some things done yesterday.  While hubby was at the hospital doing what he needed to do, I moved my sewing machine to another area in that back room (I was able to get rid of the buffet that was only collecting things in and on it) so freed up some space.  The TV stand I was able to get rid of the week before.  I am trying to let go.  And it isn't easy.  Not that I need any of what I have.  If someone wants it and I'm not using it, I'm glad to let it go.  I moved my weight bench out of this room and all the weights and this room feels and looks much better!  Still have clutter, especially here in my corner, which I need to straighten up my books and put some in the other room on the book shelves.  I will get around to it soon.  Maybe today.  Maybe.   I plan to move that one desk in the back room around and hopefully create enough space to put my treadmill in that room.  Then part of me says to just sell it and the weight bench and go to the gym that we pay for.  It's just hard for me to go with working.  By the time I'm finished for the day, I have to fix dinner and then I don't want to go anywhere.  Give me a book or my crocheting.  With having these here, I can hopefully jump on the treadmill even for ten minutes off and on throughout the day.  Hubby don't like me walking outside by myself and he doesn't always want to go.  Although we both need to.

In fact, as I turned on my back in the bed this morning - and I'm being very open here - and my butt settled into the 'dip' in the mattress, the thought occurred to me that I have allowed exactly what I always said I wouldn't allow..... I wouldn't gain weight as I aged... and yet, here I am.  Perhaps that was in the back of my mind as the jeans I was wearing yesterday were feeling pretty snug.  I am going to have to start eating better - and a lot less of it.  That pint (or two) of ice cream I ate last week are showing, I'm afraid.  Yeah, I had a couple bad days this past week.  I don't normally do that, but I did.

Today is a new day and is going to be a good day.  I am going to be positive and I am going to get some things accomplished today.  Now the question is.... where shall I begin?

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.  What are you going to do with this very first day.... of the rest of your life?  Something to think about.

Blessings!