Getting things back to normal....

 Normal.  What does that mean, anyway?  Currently, it means that my computer is working and I can do my job; it means that the sheets are washed and the bed is put back together after the granddaughter stayed the weekend; it means I can get my weight bench back out and begin to work out again.  Ok, so that working out part isn't 'normal', but I want to make it so.

Yeah, I'm getting ready to hit my weights again; in fact, I did start last week but due to lack of space had to move it off to the side against the wall for the weekend, but it's nearly completely cleared off (just have some things I need to send to my sister on it) so I can get back at it again.  I've got to get focused.  Why?  Because I don't want to become frail and fragile as I age.  If I keep moving, I'll keep my muscles strong and my body able to stand straight and move easily.  If I stop and become completely sedentary, I will become weak and my bones will become brittle and unable to support myself.  

My sister is a good example.... remember the falling out of bed she did a few months back?   (She has actually fallen a couple times since then too)  Yeah, she was sitting up, sliding off the bed, when her feet slipped out from under her (rug on a wood floor) and down she went, breaking the T12 and a rib.  She kept commenting that she felt her entire body 'compress' when she fell.  No one would listen to her.  She recently went to the doctor and got measured; had a bone density test.  The doctor called her.  She had shrunk TWO INCHES.  Seriously.  That is what she said.  Plus, she was diagnosed with Osteoporosis.    She now has two choices.  Continue to sit and just do normal household routines - or start lifting light weights, working up to heavier ones, to build strength back into her body.  She SAYS she is going to start lifting.  I had bought her a weight bench earlier for a birthday gift.  It's been gathering dust for awhile.  I don't nag as I don't like people on my case about working out - or not.  It has to be her choice.  The losing two inches has startled her and I'm hoping that soon she will begin to work out again, even if it is only a few arm lifts/extensions.

And I need to get back at mine too.  I am probably just as sedentary as she is as I sit at the desk Monday-Friday.  Hubby is starting to nag at me and it is annoying me.  He actually went to the gym yesterday and did two sets of arm lifts and walked on the treadmill.  Then he comes home to tell me that the Rec center has a big swimming pool that is like a maze and that people just walk through it for exercise.  Now I realize that exercises in water is very good for you and can be just as effective as working with weights.  But it isn't my thing.  And he is nagging at me that I should do it.  I ignored him.  Later he brought it up again and said that 'he' would walk with me in the pool, that lots of people were doing it.  I finally told him that I never got in to the pool we had, so why would I get in the pool there.  His comment?  Why? Because you'd need to put on a swimsuit?  Yes, I was annoyed.  I am not comfortable with the shape of my body and have avoided a swimsuit on most occasions.  Why would I put it on and go out in public?  I just repeated 'it's not my thing and I'm not comfortable with it'.  I will go and lift weights and use the treadmill and other machines.  When I drop 20 pounds I may be more inclined.  But I just don't want to.   Oh, he also wanted me to stop my quiet time early and go at 6AM for 1/2 hour.  I don't do mornings..... as a rule.

I enjoy walking.  I hear people out walking as early as 5AM nowadays.  They are talking as they walk by our house and in the early morning hours the sound carries.  I would stop to walk at 6:30AM with him.... (starting work at 7AM).... but hubby doesn't like to walk.  The last time we walked he went down the side of one block and said he was going back.  His usual excuse.  "I haven't walked for awhile and I don't want to overdo it."  Yep.  That's the excuse.  Just like with working out.  "I haven't worked out for months so I can only do one or two sets."  I choose to push myself... use lighter weights and complete the set.   

I think of Moses and look how strong he was!  And Caleb!  In their 80's +!    And they climbed mountains and cleared land.  And they walked everywhere!  They were strong.  We have become a very lazy people with our lifestyles.  I don't want to fall and break a bone.  I know my bones aren't as strong as they used to be and they won't heal as fast as they would in my younger years.  

I want to live life.  I think back to my parents, my grandparents, and how when they got to a certain age they quit living life.  It's like 'ok, we're 60 now and retired so we can sit and watch TV all day.'  And they did.  Oh mother did her ceramics and all, but it does require sitting all day too.  There is so much to do to live life.  I hear my friends doing things all the time.  I'm not jealous, but I envy the freedom they have to do things.

Ok - time to get back to 'my' normal....  time to shower and get ready to start my day.  I have nothing on my calendar so it will be another day of waiting to respond to emails.  I could do some training... but my 'don't want to' is intact again today.  I keep getting emails from companies wanting me to come work for them.  It's getting comical.  They found my resume that I posted on Indeed back in 2017.  Problem for them is that I'm not looking, nor could or would they pay me what I am making now.  And until I get another boss (and the interviews have started), I won't have that much to do.

Normal.  I want to change my normal.  What about you?  Are you ready to take that walk around the block just to get started?  Grab a couple cans of green beans and lift them just to build up strength in your arms? How about a couple gallons of water?  Could you do 3 sets of ten reps and complete it easily? 

Wishing you a 'normal' day.... whatever that means for you.

Blessings!

In the midst of the storm....

 There is a saying that my mother used to say frequently.  This morning I read it in my Bible reading.  Mother always said.... "Red sky at night, sailors delight.  Red sky at morning, sailors take warning."  What did it mean?  Simple.  If the sky was red at night, that meant the next day would be nice and calm.  But if the morning brought a red sky, it would be a rough day on the water.

In Matthew 16:1-4 (NJKV)  Then the Pharisees and Sadducees came, and testing Him asked that He would show them a sign from heaven.  He answered and said to them, "When it is evening you say, 'It will be fair weather, for the sky is red'; and in the morning, 'It will be foul weather today, for the sky is red and threatening.' Hypocrites! You know how to discern the face of the sky, but you cannot discern the signs of the times.  A wicked and adulterous generation seeks after a sign, and no sign shall be given to it except the sign of the prophet Jonah." And He left them and departed.

Arizona has some very beautiful sunsets.  One can go out and look and see the beauty and feel the Presence of God just in the beauty of what we see.  Others don't even noticed the majesty of beauty God is painting just for us.  When I see a beautiful sunset - or sunrise - I love to pause my life for a few minutes just to take in its beauty and thank God for painting the sky.... and sometimes I'll even say, "just for me".  Sometimes I need just a moment of beauty to remove the struggle of what I'm going through at that time. Have you noticed that?  When struggles, disappointments, discouragements come.... when you see the beauty of the sky, the sound of a grandchild's voice, the laughter of a child..... all of a sudden you can find joy in that moment.   Think back over the past few days.... have you been discouraged and disappointed with life.... and something has come to give you that moment of joy?  

I don't know about you, but I live for those moments.  Last week was a tough week at times, discouraging, disappointing.... and yet, I was able to have our granddaughter over for a couple days and my heart began to sing again.   I believe that God gives us these little things to bring us joy and help us through tough times.

Yesterday was a tough day, but it wasn't so much about me.  My work laptop computer decided to go black.  I have a monitor hooked up to it and I could work with the one screen, but the laptop was black.  Could not get a screen up.  I would restart and it would come up, then start streaking and flashing, come up on the monitor and the laptop screen would go black again.  At 8AM I was on the phone with IT.  I was made very happy for I thought I may have to do a trip to Mesa.  I really hadn't thought of it, but my company has a couple hospitals and other office buildings right in this little city in which I live.  They have to have IT readily available to them for their needs - so we have a few IT offices here!  I never would have thought of it - always just thought IT would be at the corporate offices only.  I only had to drive about 5 miles to one of the locations to have my computer looked at.  

After working online with two IT people and nothing working, a third IT person called me and suggested I bring the computer in and they'd swap it out for me.  I went down about 11AM.  He tried checking my computer to see what was going on.  It wouldn't come up, but flashed the screen and streaked it.... so he decided that perhaps he could just swap out the screen.  He came back a few minutes later that no, he couldn't, so he proceeded to move information from my computer to this other one.  That took awhile because I also need visio and adobe pro added.  It's separate because they are licensed programs.  Then he uploaded Microsoft 365 as that is what we are using now.  Teams would not load.  He uninstalled Microsoft 365 and reloaded it.  Still Teams would not load.  I use Teams on a daily basis and we use it for meetings so I did need it.  He had to go to a meeting that I had already made him late for, so I took my 'new' computer and came home.

I couldn't get on our internet.  I went to hubby to confirm the password.  Yes, that is the password, but it must be in all CAPITAL letters.  Ok.  So I went back and tried to input it.  Nope, wouldn't accept it.  I did this several times.  I did it in all small letters.  I did just the first letter capital and the rest small.  Still would not accept it.  IT contacted me to finish working on Teams and I told them I couldn't sign in on our internet.  He confirmed it would be the password that was the issue.  I asked hubby again. He grabbed his little book of passwords and said, yes, it was all capitals.  Fine.  I get my computer and go back to the the office so that the IT person could finish getting Teams loaded.  We discussed my internet connection problem.  He checked the system and again said it had to be the password.   Once he got Teams loaded (finally!) I came back home.  It was 3:45PM and my entire afternoon had been at the office.  I asked hubby again about the passward and was assured what it was.  Then I remembered a piece of paper that he had given me when we were still at the other house and had switched from one internet service to this one.  I had come across it when unpacking and had put it on my desk in the other room.  Never thought I'd need it, but thought I'd go check it just to be sure it didn't have a number or something added to it.

Low and behold.... the password had one capital letter and the rest of the letters were small.  I thought I had used that before in all the other times I was trying to get on the internet, but apparently I didn't, for I inputted the password I found and it worked!  I got on the internet and was able to connect VPN to the office.  Hubby stood in the doorway watching me, and I told him he needed to change it in his book to make sure he has the right password written down.  He looks at me and says "Oh it's not in my book because I know what the password is."  I just looked at him.  If h had written it down and given me the correct information, it could have saved me another trip to the office and saved me some time.

No, I wasn't angry, nor even frustrated.  It's one of those times when I just throw my hands up in the air and say 'Lord, help me!'   I wonder what color the sky was yesterday morning...... :-)

We ended the day out to dinner with friends, and coming home I realized that I was completely exhausted from my day.  I hadn't really done anything, but it was the doing nothing that exhausted me.   I did work an hour after I got home, and luckily I only had one meeting to get scheduled.  Once I took care of that I was able to relax and get ready for our dinner plans.  It was a very long day, but at least I have a computer that works - I hope!  Will start in less than an hour so will see.

Life throws curves at us sometimes and we can either get angry and frustrated at it or we can 'suck it up' and just roll with it.  We can make plans to get things accomplished and the little things interfere with it.  How we react determines where we are at that time.  Are we God-centered or self-centered.  Is it all about US and our needs?  Or are we relying on God to take what is wrong and give us the peace that He will make right what needs to be done?   God's response may not be the response we WANT the situation to have, but His ways are always better.  If we look at our circumstances that way, we will perhaps not understand at that time, but when things happen, you know that God is in control.  

I don't know about you, but I'm grateful that I serve a God who loves me enough to intervene in situations to make them right according to His Word.  They may not end up the way I want them too, but in time, I see His hand all over the situation.  As you know, I struggle a lot in some situations.  But it is God's hand that I hold on to in order to get through the tough times.  Yes, I still get angry, I still get frustrated, I still get hurt.  Sometimes it feels like no one cares and I fight the depression that the enemy throws at me.  I refuse to let people get me down.  Why?

Because my Hope is in Jesus.  He is the author and perfector of my faith.  He created my very being and loves me beyond all measure.  And He is your Hope as well.

Going through something?  Lean into Jesus.  He is the Rock and Foundation you need to stand on.

Blessings!

Getting back to normal....

 The granddaughter was taken back home yesterday after dinner and we settled in for the evening.  We/I really had a good time with her being here.  She was polite, willing to help, kept her things picked up and the bed made.  She was respectful and a delight to have.  But all good things must come to an end, right?  I received a text from my son last night, thanking us for taking her for the weekened and said that she was excitedly telling him all about the weekend.  Not that we did anything special, but I would guess it is moreso that we gave her attention.  I enjoyed having her over.  

And now we're getting back to 'normal'.  I'm in my room this morning, in my chair, with my prayer shawl around my shoulders, my blanket over my body and footies on my feet.  I'm warm, I'm comfortable, and with my cup of coffee, am working on becoming awake.  I love that I was able to spend more time reading my Bible this morning instead of being interruped and stopping because I couldn't concentrate on it.

I won't be cooking like I have this weekend either!  Hubby liked the fact I fixed three meals a day.  Ok, you really can't call Taco Bell a meal, but it helped fill them up until dinner time.  Yesterday I guess we only had two meals since I didn't wake the granddaughter until after church so that made it a late breakfast.  We made it through until early evening for dinner.  But it was an easy fix - put chicken in the crockpot earlier in the day and the meat just fell apart when we were ready to eat it.  Sent the leftovers home with the granddaughter.  Back on my eating plan today - got to eat more healthy.  Well, once I finish up the ice cream in the freezer, that is.  :)

My plan is to get back, not only in my eating better, but back into exercising again starting today.  I have missed my morning protein shake so will be glad to have it this morning.  Since I wore my granddaughter out shopping on Saturday, our conversation automatically turned to exercise.  She used to get a lot of exercise - she worked out with weights at school and also ran track.  But with COVID, and not going in person to school for awhile, kind of caused that to stop.  She hasn't gone back, although school was in session a short while before summer.  She mentioned she would be a JUNIOR this year!!  I'm going "NO WAY!"   We discussed working out and I emphasized the importance of eating ... and eating healthy ....  to gain strength and energy.  Working out isn't any good if you don't feed your body the nutrients it needs.  We even agreed to hold each other accountable and check in periodically to see if the other is doing anything.  I think that was more for my benefit.... to make sure that I am exercising.  After all, I can't whine about the shape and health of my body if I'm not doing anything to make it better.

Back to work today.  I have not even opened my computer since I shut it down on Thursday evening.  I know someone has been working over the weekend because when I've come into this room I've heard the 'ding' of the computer telling me there is a message.  Hopefully it is just that I'm copied on a message.  Because of issues with my computer I don't totally shut it down over the weekend but just put it to 'sleep'.  There is something wrong and IT can't figure it out - I need a new computer but I'm afraid if I shut it down now, it won't come back up.  It would take me three-four times to get it to come on.  Now I just restart it on occasion to get the updates completed.  The graphics is all messed up too.  Instead of a blue background, when they did the 365 upgrade, it turned my back screen black.  As long as I can keep using it, I am.  If I go back into the office I will have them swap it out, unless I just want to take a trip to Mesa to get it done.  Naw... not in the near future anyway.

I'm thankful this morning.  Thankful that God blessed our weekend with the granddaughter and we had a good weekend.  I'm thankful for an awesome message on Sunday morning by Reggie Dabbs.  He spoke at Free Chapel this weekend and the message he gave had men, women, and teenagers giving up the pain of the past, to embrace what God has for their future.  It was awesome.  He told a story .... it can be a long one, so perhaps I'll wait and share it later.  I'll have to make a note to do that.  It is a good story.

I'm thankful for my job.  It allowed me to play some this weekend and not have to watch every penny spent.  I have spent many, many years of having to do that, barely having money to buy food to eat.  It was nice that I could stop and pick up Taco Bell and not worry about the cost of 9 soft tacos for us.  Few people can understand that statement anymore, and I'm happy for them.  But we have lived through it and I am very thrifty when it comes to some things.  Besides.  I have to save my money for Christmas.  Just kidding!   I watch my spending because at some point I want to retire.  Hubby spends more each week than I do with going out to meet his friends for meals.  He is meeting one of them this morning for breakfast, in fact.  And that's ok.  He needs to get out as well and I'm ok with that.  I have Amazon Smile for my 'going out for a meal'.   :-)  And I can do it without leaving my house.

God is good.  All the time God is good.  He continues to provide for us, take care of us, and meets are needs.  We don't get everything we want, but we have everything we need.  He always provides.  

He always provides for you as well.  In your darkest hour, He will meet you there if you will let Him.  He is always holding out His hand to you, waiting to draw you close to Him.  He wants to walk with you today.  Will you let Him?

Blessings!

Sunday....already?

 It's been a good weekend.  Hubby and I haven't had any disagreements (yet - it's still Sunday).  Even yesterday he practically 'pushed' the granddaughter and I out the door to go shopping.  Probably because he wanted a nap or watch his own shows, which he hasn't been watching when we're home.  Too busy seeing what we are doing?  :)

Since I've been telling some of what the granddaughter and I have been doing, will share yesterday.  We went shopping for about 4 hours. Get this - I wore the granddaughter out!  She blamed it on no school, staying in her room day and night, and not getting up to do anything.  I get that.  In a home where there is constant conflict, one tends to stay where they feel 'safe' from conflict. 

I took the granddaughter up to a new area to shop instead of the usual places we'd normally go. I hadn't even been in these shops yet that are north and west of us. Same stores, different location.  We just started at the end of a strip and went down it. Then crossed the street to do the same thing.  We really didn't buy much, but did walk around a lot.  There were a couple she hadn't been in before (Five Below, which she says she really likes as the prices are decent.  Kirklands; a different type of store for her).  We actually opted out of a few stores....she was getting tired.   

In spite of oatmeal for breakfast - which she liked (or said she did), around 1PM she did admit she was getting hungry so we headed back to the house; stopping at (gasp!) Taco Bell to pick up soft tacos for the three of us for lunch.  After eating we just chilled; watching movies later in the day.  The granddaughter will be going back home later today and I will miss her.  It's been nice having her here to visit.   We picked the perfect weekend for her to visit; their air conditioner was out a couple days - I hear it is fixed and running now.

Our routines have been messed up some as we have been staying up a couple hours later than usual - which isn't a bad thing - watching movies.  I still get up early but making it around 5AM instead of 4AM since I don't have to jump on the computer for work.  I let the granddaughter sleep until about 8:30AM before getting her up - and she does right away.  We have really enjoyed having her for a few days.  I wish I could have all the grandchildren over...but hubby would not be able to handle it every weekend if I did.  He's not keen on sharing me.... but has done exceptionally well this weekend. I've been greatly surprised.

This morning is church and we will watch it at our usual time and will wake the granddaughter up afterwards.... at least that is my plan.  Since she doesn't go to church at all, forcing her to watch it around the computer screen like we do may not be the best thing to do.  I know Jentezen Franklin has it on TV as well, but the problem with that is you miss the worship music and he often goes longer than 45 minutes for his message... and on TV it will get cut off.  We've tried to watch him before on TV and saw that it happened.  We enjoy the worship music too much to not have any.   We have also decided to check out a Congregational Church nearby online.  We like to hear the message first to get an idea of what they preach; check out their beliefs as a church, etc.  We did listen to a church hubby really wanted to go to last week.... the pastor talked so slow... and we both found the message lifeless and boring.  Hubby talked to our neighbor next door and happened to mention it, I guess, for he came back home and said that 'she said' she and her husband used to go to this church.  It had 200-300 members and the pastor was a great preacher.  Then he left and the one they have now.... has dwindled the congreation down to less than 100, she thought.  She goes to the Congregational Church down the street, which we knew, but hadn't checked out yet.  She said the pastor is really good, so I think we will watch it online some time this week.  We just want a church that we can plug into and be involved in - not necessarily on a 'pastor' level, but as members.  

Church is important, yes, but good preaching is good for the soul.  I've heard some pastors are not preachers, but teachers.  They will take the Word and will talk about what it means.  Sometimes that turns people off.  It's good to know what the Word means, don't get me wrong, but people want - and need - to hear what the Word tells us in how to live in this sinful world.  And you know that is the truth.  It seems moreso because of the media; not necessarily because sin is just becoming more prevalent.  Sin is being promoted instead of denounced.  It is a sinful world we live in, and we need to do all we can to protect not only our children and grandchildren, but ourselves from sin.  It has a way of wiggling itself in to our lives, in to our homes by item, by words, and by behaviors.  The Bible says we need to be on our guard.

I Corinthians 16:13:  Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.  

There are other scriptures that I could share.... but hubby is interrupting me cause he wants me to get things ready for church.  I miss my room in the mornings where he isn't interrupting me (this is the third time in the last 30 minutes).  Out of sight, out of mind.  But, sitting here on the couch, it makes it so easy for him to stop and ask me questions.

So - I must close this off and get the computer up and ready for churc this morning.  I think the 'abnormal' around here (having company and I'm out of my routine) is starting to unsettle him.  I do find it interesting that he used to always insist he have two hours for his quiet time.... and barely an hour and he quits since I've been out in the living room.  Could it be one hour is sleeping and one hour is study?  LOL  I HAVE heard him snoring about an hour before I get out of my room... just saying.

Have a blessed day!

So far, so good......

It was a good day yesterday.  We watched a few movies.  We managed to go to a couple thrift stores and do some 'thrifty shopping'.  We got a facial.  We watched more movies.   I have no idea what to do today but it may involve watching more movies (she actually enjoys the 'up faith and family movies' we have been watching!).  

I have already decided what we will have for breakfast this morning.  Oatmeal.  Yes, Oatmeal.  Why?  Because I make good oatmeal.  AND, because we were talking about oatmilk in coffee (Dutch Bros has one but I don't remember the name of it.  Another granddaughter gets it and I tasted it once - and it was good).  Actually, I think the conversation about oatmeal really started because this granddaughter and I stopped at Starbucks while wasting time before our facials.  I wanted my unsweetened green tea - only to be told by Starbucks that they didn't have any.  It was like 'what? what do you mean you don't have green tea?'  Seems that they have been unable to get green tea from their producers.  Seriously?

Has the brokenness of this nation of the past year started to filter down to food and supplies and the inability to get them?  It can be scary if something as simple as unsweetened green tea has become scarce.  I ordered a 'brown sugar oatmilk.... something or other.  LOL  My first taste of it reminded me of a burnt oatmeal cookie - but it was actually so good!  Glad that I got a small cause Starbuck prices are getting way out of line.  I guess that is another reason I don't frequent these coffee places and I don't usually order a 'flavored drink'.  I drink real coffee.  I just don't care that much for Starbucks coffee so don't go often.

Anyway, two paragraphs later.... we got on the subject of oatmeal because of the oatmilk in my drink, and the granddaughter mentioend that she does not remember ever having oatmeal!  Seriously!  She will get a taste of oatmeal this morning.  I'm just hoping I can find some raisins in the cabinet cause I used all that was in one bag last weekend when I fixed us oatmeal for breakfast.  Just a pinch of brown sugar, raisins, unsweetened almond milk, and then I throw in raw sunflower seeds and chop up some walnuts to put in it.  Yum!  Have to leave the walnuts out of hubby's cause he doesn't like them.  But I do.

When was the last time you had oatmeal for breakfast?  Or for any other meal?  I use the good old fashioned oats to make it.  Try it...you just might decide you like it ... and it is good for you.

Sheeba is sitting in her crate looking at me, wondering when I'm going to let her out.  Usually she doesn't even see me until I come out of my room, but since I'm having to do my quiet time in the living room, she is wondering why I can't let her out.  Aw, there, she laid back on her back again - feet up against the side of the crate.... she's going back to sleep.  Hubby is in his 'office' that he claimed.....

I slept late this morning and could have slept longer but I didn't want to go back to sleep.  We were up until after 10PM watching movies and the fact I slept until almost 6AM says something of itself.  Of course my Fitbit alarm went off at 5AM and again at 5:30AM as that is what I set it for on weekends, but I didn't want to get up.  Finally did at 5:55AM.  I can't let my time alone with God go in the mornings; it is too important to me.  I could spend all day alone with God... but most days anymore it just isn't possible.  He knows my longing; he knows my heart.

I was reading in Matthew this morning about Jesus healing a man's hand on a Sunday.  'Don't work on a Sunday or you are sinning' was the rule of the day.  And Jesus gave the story that if a man had an animal that had fallen into a well, wouldn't he, even tho it was the Sabbath, get it out?  Isn't that work?  They didn't like that response - especially when Jesus healed the man.

That story triggers a memory of my former in-laws.  I loved them dearly.   But I remember being confused and surprised when I discovered they would not go out to eat after church on Sundays because they were causing others to work (cooks, waitresses, etc.) if someone prepared food for them.  They should be in church, not working.  I don't know if they held out for that all the years they lived, but I know they did when I was first married into that family.  Mom always cooked on Sundays.... and her roasts were exceptional.  Dad didn't care for chicken - even fried chicken - so that was a rare meal.

Now it was nothing for my parents to stop by hamburger joints on the way home - 'Satellite' was the name of one (39 cent hamburgers); A&W Root beer where we always got a root beer float; Burger Chef; and the one and only... White Castles.  Oh my goodness!  My step-father would buy 4-6 white castles for each of us.  And we ate them all.  We didn't care about fries or onion rings... in fact, I don't even remember getting them at that time.  I think White Castles were either 8 cents or 10 cents each.  So for a buck a piece, my parents could feed their many children until they were full.  I still love White Castles but can usually get only 2-3 down until I can't eat any more.  Of course I usually have fries with those.  White Castle is out here now... when my youngest son or daughter goes over, not every time, for sure, but will sometimes bring a case of White Castles over to us and we will eat them for a couple days.  But then I don't want any for awhile.  Some people talk about adverse effects of White Castles, but I don't recall having any.

Making memories, or remembering memories of things past is always a good thing.  I'm hoping the things we do this weekend - even just sitting and watching romantic movies - will be a good memory for this granddaughter when she gets older.   And yes, I can compare it to my memories of White Castles.  It's still a memory!

Take some time today to make a memory with someone you love.  You may think it is nothing; you may even forget all about it.  But they won't.  Start today.  Leave a legacy.

Blessings!

Friday.....but a Saturday....sorta

 I am messing up my entire week...today.  Today is actually FRIDAY, but I have taken it off work, making it a SATURDAY in the world of confusion.   Why did I take today off work?  Partly because I'm just tired.  With sitting in front of the desk Monday through Friday - and rarely with much to do - it gets boring and wears on you somewhat.  I have been feeling, for a few weeks now, a great desire to just 'get away' by myself.  I think I've even mentioned it a time or two.  This is not that day.  But I still have my morning alone - sorta - because hubby is meeting a friend for breakfast so will be gone most of the morning.  I still have Sheeba to 'contend' with.... and she is confused why I am sharing her 'space' this morning in the early hours.  Although it isn't so much early right now.  But I've been out here in the living room for over an hour so she isn't sure what's going on.  Hubby didn't get up until 6AM - which is totally unusual - so I've gotten a late start on my coffee so none of this may make sense either.

I had made plans to bring my youngest granddaughter over later today to spend the weekend with us.  Sometimes I think my daughter and I are the only 'good' influence this child has.  Unfortunately, the time we spend is slim to none with her.  Life happens.  But this weekend I had planned for us to get together.  As a treat, I have scheduled facials for us at Massage Envy this afternoon.  Other than that, we don't have much plans, except maybe thrift store shopping and bingeing on movies.  

I wasn't planning on picking her up until after lunch today, but my plans don't always work out.  I saw on facebook, and then her father called me, that their air conditioning had gone out and the home warranty said they couldn't send anyone out for 24-48 hours.  I then decided to bring her over early so picked her up yesterday after I got off work.  

That's why I'm in the front room writing this.  She is in 'my office',  the '2nd bedroom', my 'quiet room'.  Last night I brought out my Bible and books to read this morning, but forgot the computer.  I grabbed it as I shut the door this morning.  Of course NOW I don't have any privacy and hubby is going back and forth and talking to me and asking questions.  He knows I'm in my 'quiet time'... but because I'm out in the open and not behind closed doors, I guess it's ok to interrupt.  sigh.  I get no respect.

I'm glad I took today off work - that it was planned.  Even though I still won't have my own 'space' this weekend, I find enjoyment hanging out with the grandchildren.  They seem to revive my heart when I feel down and burdened and defeated.  My grandchildren bring me so much joy.  If I had my druthers.... I'd have grandchildren over all the time.

But, with taking off today, as I mentioned before, it makes today Saturday and tomorrow being the real Saturday, will really throw me off for Sunday.  But I'm grateful to have a day where I can just 'chill'... even if I am busy doing things.

There is someone in your life that needs your attention, your love.  It could be a child, a grandchild, a friend, your spouse.  They need to know someone cares.  It's hard for children nowadays... this world has 'gone to hell in a handbasket' it seems.  No one cares for anyone else, looking out for only themselves.

Stop the bus and get off.  Pick up the phone and call that child, that grandchild, that friend.  Let them know that you were thinking about them and that you care.  Tell them they are valued, and that you love them.  They never will forget this moment.

My apology for the rambling... distractions keep the mind from focusing.... and Sheeba wants my attention so that I'll show her some love...  she wants fed.

Have a blessed day!

Looking through another's eyes....

Sometimes we adults just get too busy, do you think?  We feel like we have to do this and do that, work at our jobs, fix the food, do the laundry - always something to keep us busy.... and we forget to look around us in the eyes of a child.  Let's think about this.  Lost in the wonder of life itself, a person could whisper these five simple requests.

Slow down.  We get so busy wanting to get things done that we rush about and neglect the little and simple things of life.  We dash from one store to the next when we are out shopping.  We sweep and dust and put away and do things.... when all the while those that are with us would say "slow down".  Take your time.  Those things can wait.  Enjoy life while you can.  Take a moment and smell the flowers.  Play that game with me.  Read to me.  Let's take a walk together.  Remember I am here and don't be so busy you don't have time for me.

Stay home. Instead of going out to dinner, how about hot dogs on a grill (or even boiling - remember those times?)  Let's pop popcorn and watch a movie together that we both like.  Share a special song you heard that you liked.  Spend time with those you love.  Let's live life together.

Tell stories. Sometimes our stories die with us....and we forget to tell them.  This blog has been beneficial in that I have shared some stories over the years... but how many more have I forgotten that I need to tell? Not just about me, but about my parents; that I can pass this on to my children.  (Did you know that Grandma Hanky walked 3 miles in the snow behind a wagon to go to schoool?  And that her lunch was two biscuits?)  Sit down and write out or type out your stories of your life.  How do you think your children, your grandchildren will remember who you are if you don't share your stories with them?  Stories of your 'growing up' years will sometimes brings lots of laughter.  Now why did I just think of 'Sugar and Spice' - the Shetland ponies we had for a very short time?   Take some time and share your life stories with others.

Have fun.  Everyone loves to play something!  Me, I love to play at cooking - baking cookies with grandchildren.  Christmas is my favorite time of year because I get all the grandchildren over at some time and we bake cookies together.  We've done this since my oldest granddaughter was 2 years old.  But why do I always wait until Christmas time to do this?  Why can't we bake cookies throughout the year?  It just hasn't been possible for obvious reasons, but I regret not doing it more often.  Don't have regrets.  Take the time to do something fun with someone.  It will not only make their day, but it will build the bond you have with each other.  Make dinner together.  Do a puzzle together.  Play a game together.  These are the times that people will remember when you are gone.  Enjoy life. Make the most of each day, of the time you have with each other.  Have fun.

Give yourself.  It's sometimes easier to just buy something and hand off to your spouse or your child and say 'here, go play' than it is to spend time with them.  But that's what they want!  The gift is fine, but what they really want is YOU.  Your touch of appreciation.  Your listening ear.  Your phone call.   Some thing you may make yourself.  Something you do to make life a little easier for someone.  (pick up your own clothes?  do the laundry?  runt he sweeper?  cook dinner yourself?  just a few suggestions)  Try stepping out of your comfort zone and give yourself to those you care for.  

When a child holds their arms out to you, they are wanting YOU, not what you can give them.  Many people are still that child within, holding out their arms (although you may not see them), and just wanting you.

Life is short.....  make the most of it.  Make memories, Share memories, Be the memory.

Blessings!

He must have changed his mind this morning....

 Hubby got up shortly after I did this morning, made and brought my coffee to me, and then I heard him taking a  shower.  Today is Wednesday and he has his men's Bible study at IHOP at 5:30AM.  (That is just WAY too early to be awake, dress, leave the house, and go somewhere else!)  He will usually come in around 5:15 and tell me he is leaving, and leave my door open (for whatever reason).  This morning, however, he hasn't come in to tell me he is leaving.  I notice it is now 5:28AM and it's quiet in the other room.  Did he sit down and fall asleep?  Did he change his mind about going this morning?  He does have several things going on this morning, 8AM doctor appointment, 10AM dog grooming (but the groomer does come here).  I could get up and go see, but it's too late for him to leave and go so if he has fallen back to sleep, I'll let him sleep.  I'll come out of here in plenty of time for him to go to the doctor.  He could have just changed his mind about going.

I don't have much on the calendar to do for work today so it may be a long day.  I must stay at my desk; or check the computer frequently to see if there is something I need to do.  I could clean out my folders.  That would probably be a good idea to delete some things I no longer need, especially since my other boss is gone now.

I have one week left on my Elijah study and guess who hasn't even started it!  I don't know why I haven't - the book is sitting right here - and I keep forgetting about it.  I definitely need to get started on it today while I don't have a lot to do and get caught up.  I heard the first day of this week is a long one so it may take me a couple days to get it done.  I need to listen to the audio part of the lesson - which is only about 20 minutes - and that's one reason I haven't started it - I want to listen to it first and of course 'fill in the blanks'.

Have you ever taken a course where you have to fill in the blanks and you keep listening for them to use those exact words so that you know what word goes in there......... and then you discover they have already moved on to the next paragraph and YOU MISSED THAT WORD?  I hate when that happens!  At least I can 'rewind' the audio and listen again (and again) until I figure out that even though she was giving the blanks in the next paragraph, she skipped that paragraph you were waiting on, and went back to it AFTER the next paragraph.  Keeps you listening, though!

How many times has our spouse or our child been talking to us and we MISSED the entire conversation?  Missed the words they were trying to emphasize to us?  We were pre-occupied, we really weren't interested in what they were saying, we were angry and didn't WANT to listen, or we were just choosing to ignore them.  Ouch.  Does that hit home?

Do you (I) realize how important that conversation was to that child, that spouse, that friend?  

So we realize then they are waiting on a response of any kind from us.....and we have nothing.  We weren't giving them our undivided attention so have no idea what they had just said.  What do you do?  Do you just grunt and say 'I don't know' and they look at you and have this confused expression on their face becuase they just gave you all the information....and you 'don't know'?

I wonder if we could instead respon with 'well, tell me your thought about it', or perhaps we could just say 'I'm sorry, my mind was elsewhere and I didn't hear what you said.  Would you mind repeating it?'  It may frustrate them that you weren't listening, but at least you were honest enough to say "I didn't hear what you said, please tell me again".  And then give them your undivided attention.

We spouses tend to do that to each other frequently, don't you think?  We turn a 'deaf ear' to the person we live life with.  Why do we do that?  Because we are consumed with ourselves?  Perhaps we need to think of that other person.....just saying.  Yeah, I'm guilty here so I'm not preaching to the crowd.

Each one of us is a Treasure to love and behold.  Not only do WE want to be treated with respect and love, but so does everyone we come in contact with.   Let' s make that our focus today, shall we?  Today, give your child or spouse your undivided attention when they speak to you.  Actually listen to what they have to say.  Respond to them and ask questions, if needed.  Let them know that you value them.  If we make it a point to do that every day... we will find the atmosphere in our homes will be much calmer, more joyful, more loving, more kind.

One day at a time.

Blessings.

Yesterday was a good day....

 I was busy yesterday, but not so much with work.  With only one boss right now, and a very self-sufficient one at that, I had very little to do.  But I'm glad about that because I had volunteered to fix dinner for a friend who has recently been diagnosed with CML (chronic myeloid leukemia) and before she could get treatment, was rear-ended (picture the back of the car pushed into the front rear-ended) and now is recovering from a broken sternum, broken ribs, and a compressed vertebrae.  Besides bruises.  Anyway, I volunteered to cook dinner - and I love to cook.  MY problem with cooking is that if I am fixing for others, I can't fix enough stuff!  And, of course, I have to keep enough and make enough that there is plenty for us to eat as well.  

I tried a new very easy recipe for a roast.  A chuck roast at that!  You take the roast and put in a crockpot.  Add one can of soda.  Add one jar of chili sauce.  Add two cloves of garlic (I used minced).  And let it cook for 6-8 hours.  Mine cooked for 8 hours and it was so tender!  It had a mild flavor to it but nothing overshadowing the taste of the meat, which I like.  Besides the roast I had mashed potatoes, green beans, deviled eggs, and sugar-free cherry cobbler (another easy recipe - 2 cans SF cherry pie filling, 1 box of yellow cake mix, 1 stick of butter).  I used sugar free because my friend's hubby is diabetic.  Anyway - put the cherry pie filling in the bottom of the crock pot (use a small crockpot for the one can), pour the cake mix on top of it (dry), and add one stick of butter (I cut it up and spread all over the top).  Put the lid on the crockpot and turn on high for right about two hours.  It is so yummy.    Anyway - there you have it.  Two quick and easy recipes. And it took all day to pull it together.   LOL

I love to cook and was glad to be able to pull it together for my friend.  My plan B was to go to the grocery and get fried chicken (YUM), and find things to put with it.  A lot less work, yes, but because I love to cook, enjoyed the entire day of running from my desk to the kitchen and back again.  We ate ours after we delivered the food to my friend and it was good.  Especially the cherry cobbler.  I had fixed a separate batch for us. :-)  I intend to take some over to my neighbor sometime today.

Oh, I forgot.  I also put together eggs ole' for them.  I had meant to bake it, but my oven has died.  And the repairman can't be here until Thursday morning.  So I couldn't bake the eggs ole' but put it in a pie pan and took to them with directions on how to bake it.  I suggested they bake it last night so that they could just heat it up today.  Then 'dessert' for breakfast - we enjoy it at most meals even - unsweetened applesauce...with a sprinkle of cinnamon - and then throw in about a tablespoon of raw sunflower seeds.  It gives it crunch and makes it seem like a dessert.  Yeah, took some of that too.  I told you, once I get started I can't stop!

I'm not telling you all this because I want kudos for fixing a meal for a friend, I'm telling you this cause I love to cook and I went crazy yesterday making things!  See, it IS a good thing I work cause if I can find a reason to cook (other than just cook for us) I will be figuring out all kinds of things and trying new recipes!  And I don't have to cook dinner from scratch for us tonight - just have to put in microwave the leftovers and we have dinner!  (made you hungry yet?)

I started a new book yesterday morning called 'The Power of Hope' by Dutch Sheets.  In opening the book I found that my little sister had given it to me back in 2018 as she had written in it.  Isn't it interesting that we obviously were going through similar things then as we are now... for the introduction alone spoke to some things I've been feeling.  But I like what is written on the cover of this book.... 'Let God Renew Your Mind, Heal Your Heart, and RESTORE YOUR DREAMS'.   My dreams have been shattered so many times that I have given up hope for any of them.  I don't know why I grabbed this book off the shelf, and I would say I haven't read it before (even though my sister gave it to me in 2018) but probably placed it on the shelf, being busy with other books.  

What caught my eye as I flipped through the reviews was this by Lou Engle - "Darkness shall not prevail, for God holds your history in His hands and He will not fasten your soul to a dead-end vision!"

We need to get rid of the 'common cold' of the soul, which is discouragement and loss of our dreams, and focus instead on what HOPE does.  The 'common cold' of the soul.  Yes, I pulled that from the book in the first chapter.  Not going to elaborate on it today as I've written much about cooking in this space.  But think about it.

What dreams have you had that you let go of over the years?  What things did you hope for that never came to pass?  It hurts to think of them sometimes, doesn't it?  I know it does me.  I had dreams, I had hopes, and many came to pass, but many more that I wanted, did not.  Have not.

But I can't dwell upon them or I would become a sad old woman, and I refuse to be that!  So what do I do with those broken dreams; the ones that never came to fruition?  The ones that gave me excitement and hope to plan for...only they never happen?  

I give them to Jesus.  Yep.  That's how I survive.  I can't share a lot of my dreams... people just wouldn't understand, even though who think they know me best.  Some can imagine what they could be, after all, I'm usually pretty vocal when I'm not liking things.... but ... no one knows me like Jesus does.  He knows every broken part of my heart.  He has seen every tear that has fallen.  He has heard every sob that has ever escaped.  He knows me best.

And He knows you best as well.  Even if you don't personally know Him, or that you have walked away from Him to do your own thing, He knows you.  Inside and out.  He knows your fears, your heartaches, your disappointments, your broken dreams.

Rather than continuing to hold them in, why don't you take a minute and just talk with Jesus and speak how you are feeling?  He already knows, but He's ready to listen to help you get it out.  Stop putting on a brave, sometimes very hard, front.  Just tell Jesus.   Let me help you get started....

"Jesus, you know this dream I had about...(fill in the blank).... it didn't happen.  Yeah, it may be my fault it didn't happen, but my dream still didn't happen, and it hurts.  Please help me move past what I've been holding in.  Give me Your peace about my life, and help me find a dream that I can start again, to hope again.  Hope.  I have given up on that word, but if You give it to me, I will have look to it again.  Thank You, Jesus, for not giving up on me, or my dreams."

Keep dreaming, keep hoping, never give up.

Blessings!

My tired thoughts this morning....

Lately it feels like my body is pulling a 'Ralphie'...... and only some people would understand that comment.  No, I don't mean throwing up, but being unable to sleep.  This past week has really been difficult - and yet, I find I still get 5 hours of sleep, and minutes more.  Last night was another tough night.  I tossed and turned after we went to bed around 9PM.  My Fitbit registers my sleep and how I 'sleep'.  Last night it says I went to bed at 9:03PM.  I was awake 36 minutes during the night (must have been before I finally fell to sleep), 40 minutes of REM, 5 hours 1 minute of light sleep (no wonder I am so tired!), and 51 minutes of deep sleep.  It isn't enough when I have to work.  And today is a work day.  This seems to be happening more frequently than not lately.  And I think I know why.

I'm sitting too much.  Seriously.  We did go to the grocery for a short time yesterday as I am to cook dinner for a friend who is ill tonight and other than that, I was sitting most of the day.  I'm glad the items I chose to cook I can put in a crockpot this morning.... I'm just having trouble deciding whether to go with a roast or with chicken.  So I thought I'd fix both and whichever one I decide not to give them, we can have for dinner.  My body 'rested' all day... and certainly didn't want to sleep last night! 

Hubby irritated me a bit yesterday.  I know, shocker.  He suggests to me that we both need to start exercising again (seriously?) and he thinks we need to go in the mornings and I need to adjust my schedule (i.e., my time alone in this room each morning from 4-7AM) and around 6AM be ready to go to the gym nearby at the rec center and I can walk 1/2 hour then come home and start working.  (ugly face here)  I told him no, I am not giving up my mornings 2-3 times a week to go to the gym.  Not for just 1/2 hour to walk the treadmill.

I.AM.NOT.A.MORNING.PERSON.  I often say that God is the only One who can stand me in the early morning hours.  The morning hours are my time alone with God and my 'space' to write in here.  Sure, I can do this another time....or not.  I probably bore most of you anyway.  But it is my outlet to share my thoughts and my feelings.  Hubby doesn't read here,  He asked me a few months back if I ever wrote in it and I told him yes, at times.  I was vague.  I didn't want him looking for it.  Does that make me a bad person?  He had a blog created for himself some time ago and he said not long ago that he wrote in it a couple times this year... but I have looked everywhere for his blog and cannot find it.  I must not have the title of it right.  Maybe my son can remember what it is as he set it up for hm.  Anyway, if hubby read here, I probably would quit writing.  I do not have much 'freedom' so this is an outlet for me.  I suppose I should apologize to you for that.

I got off track - no surprise, huh? 

Back to the exercise thing.... hubby finally said that he guessed we could go in the evening two-three times a week.  I don't think I responded other than evenings work better for me.  But I believe I also mentioned that he could go anytime during the day.... just saying.  I have my hand weights that I use infrequently and I have my exercises where I know what to do... but my mind hasn't been focused.  I need to start that TODAY.  I need to move past the heat in the garage and go get on my treadmill.  I would go walk, but hubby can't walk at my pace and he quits after a block.  And he doesn't like it much when I continue, so I just come back cause in the mornings - I still have to start work.  Now I could easily change my hours to start work at 8AM, but that would mean I would need to work until 5PM.  Naw, I'm done mentally by around 3... but manage to hang on until 4PM.  By 5PM we are usually eating dinner.  And most days I work through the lunch hour.

Oh - reminds me - glad I'm using the crock pots today.... I started to cook a pizza last night and my oven wouldn't heat up past 80 degrees.  Hubby has to call our home warranty today.  I think it is just the element that will need to be replaced.

I remembered this morning too that today is Amazon Prime Day.  There are to be lots of sales going on today on Amazon.  I usually ignore it.  Why?  Because I don't need to buy anything!  I may check later on some things I have on my 'wish list' that I have thrown in there for Christmas gifts.  If they are on sale I may go ahead and release them from that list, but other than that - there isn't anything we need or want.  Seriously.  I don't know how my little sister does it.  Nearly every time she gets on Amazon she will look for things and at things and can always find something to buy.  I can't do that.  I can go on Amazon every day and rarely will find something that I will decide I 'have to have'. What I have bought most recently from Amazon are books for my Kindle.  That's just what a 'reader' does.   I'm getting behind in my reading again... have several books to start.  Started and finished two books last week so that made me happy.  But I also like the physical book, which I have also bought recently, that I can hold in hand too cause I find a lot of times I'm underlining things.  Yeah, my books are not fiction books where you just read through; I like books that help me grow in my Christian walk.   

I have found a website called Thriftbooks.com and I can usually find a book there very inexpensive.  I mean like pay $4-ish for a book that would sell for double that or more.  Check it out.  I have actually purchased a few books from them lately and it takes 8-10 days I think, for them to arrive.  I haven't been disappointed yet.  Even bought a couple for my sister and had shipped direct to her and she says they are in great shape.  So now I find myself comparing prices on Amazon for the real book against the price I find on Thriftbooks.com.  I have two -three books enroute to me now from there.  THAT's where I need to stop looking!  That's what happens when you love books and love to read.

My devotional this morning really spoke to me.  In fact, the last paragraph I will leave you with today...

"Never doubt my power to fulfill your destiny and to make your dreams come true.  I am the Father of fulfilled dreams and the God of sovereign power.  Nothing can defeat my plan for your life, except for your fear and passivity.  Arise now, my child, and place your feet upon the promises; make them yours, see them fulfilled, and go out to conquer.  I am your God, and I will never leave you or abandon you.  Shout with victorious joy over these truths!"

Hebrews 10:35-36 (TPT)  "So don't lose your bold, courageous faith, for you are destined for a great reward! You need the strength of endurance to reveal the poetry of God's will and then you will receive the promise in full."

Hold on .... your promise, your dream, will be fulfilled.

Blessings!

Happy Father's Day....

 As I type those words my thoughts go to my own (real) father.  I wish my children could have known him.  I wish I could have known him.  My memories of him are so limited.  He was a good looking man, of that I have seen in photos.  My big brother looks a lot like him.  I do to, in a small way, I think.  Ironically, my big brother and I are so totally different from the rest of the family, it's almost funny.  We both choose to be all that we can be.  We are different, and yet, we have a lot of the same traits.  But we are much different than the others in that we take better care of ourselves than they do.  At least I think so.  Not to brag, but out of my family, I think I am the healthiest.  That's what living away from all the family 'stuff' does for you. :)  I often have wondered what my life would have been like had I grown up with my father.  

Memories fade over time.  And, being so young, I have to go on stories I hear.  My youngest sister was only 1 1/2 so she has no memories of daddy.  We often have talked 'what would our lives have been like' and generally agree that they certainly would not be what they are now, in many respects.  Part of our lives have been along a rough road that no one would understand.  But that's all in the past and we have moved on.

I will send a text of 'happy Father's Day' out to my boys in a bit; I don't like to text anyone this early in the morning for I don't want to wake them up.  Just because I am up, does not mean they are.  I know all my children miss their father.  And that breaks my heart.  I do too, but they don't understand that.   None of us understand why things happen they way they do.  But God had a plan in all of it.  He had to.  

Treasure the moments you have with your children, for the time is flying by.  Before you know it, all will have children of their own.  And they will get to share memories of their time with you.  What will they pass on to their children?  Will their children get to know the love you have for them?  Will your children remember the love you have for them?  Right now it may not seem like they care, but they are collecting memories that will come back in the future.  I know.  Because I remember now.  And sometimes my children remind me of things (some I wish they'd forget!).   Treasure your time with your children, your grandchildren.  Some day, that will be all they have.  Love them.  Be a part of their lives.  Not just today, but every day.  Make those memories, and make them count.   

On a more positive note, cause my memories are taking over my mind this morning and I have to stop, it is going to be another hot day.   I made blueberry jam yesterday.  I wonder if any of my children eat jam.  Seems like that answer is 'no'.  But upon a piece of toast, sometimes it is so good.  I may have to freeze some of it as it will only last 3 weeks in the refrigerator, I think, cause I don't put any pectin or sugar in it.  It is just blueberries.  So it's healthy. That word is a turnoff for most people, but it works for me. :-)   I have extra if any want some.

We did a trip to Sam's Club yesterday and it was nice - not crowded like Costco always is.  Got a lot of fruit and vegetables for I am going to try for us to eat more healthy.  I said try.  Did you know that a lot of the processed foods have inflammatory ingredients?  I mean they cause our bodies to hurt or ache.  We don't think about it, especially when we are hungry.  But I am surprised at the number of items that i have purchased in the past that have oils or products in them that cause inflamation in the body.  In my quest for us to be healthy, I want to get rid of those things so that as I age, my body doesn't hurt (it doesn't now, but could), and I think more clearly.  And not only me, but hubby as well.  I can see the effects of aging and not eating quite as healthy as we should have had on him.  He gets confused easily; mood swings; shuffles when he walks.... hopefully by changing our eating habits we can reverse some of that. 

One week to go on my study of Elijah and some of the questions in this study have been very personal and I've had to be honest with myself in responding.  I have a lot of things I need to work on in my life.  But one thing will never change, and that is how much I love my family.  I may not have been the perfect parent (definitely not); I may not be the perfect grandma (hopefully sometimes), and even as a great-grandma now I'm limited due to distance.... but I hope they each will know the love I carry for each one.  They are my joy and pride, and my delight.

Happy Father's Day, dads!  As in the Lion King (one of my favorite movies!) Simba is told by Mufasa.....

 'Remember who you are."  

Have a blessed day!

One week left of June.... and December's coming!

 Although it doesn't seem like it so much during the day, but this year feels like it is flying by.  It dawned on me the other day that we were nearly through June already.  Not that time is going by any faster than it has in the past, but perhaps I am just moving slower through it.  This working from home is great in that God has kept me off the 1.5 hour drive home - or more - as I've mentioned before.  I've actually GAINED time back in my life by being home at 4PM when I get off work.  And I have come to dread when they tell us to go back in to the office this fall.  That is the new timeframe anyway.  But then, too, I've learned some things since we were told that.

I learned my boss I report to changed my status to remote.  Which means I work from home permanently.  The office space that was to be 'mine' in the central corporate office has been 'released' and is no more.  As my former boss who recently retired told me last week, real estate is expensive, especially in office space.  They released three floors they were holding for all of us to move in to.  There are only a few offices that must be reserved when one has to go into the office, unless they are an executive, i.e., President, CMO, CFO, etc.  They have permanent offices.  Support staff, such as I am, if they have to come in to the office must reserve a cubicle for the time they are there.  And then there is the issue of 'wear a mask if not vaccinated and sit away from people' and 'wear a mask if vaccinated and you feel you need to, but you don't have to distance yourself'.  Also - only THREE people are allowed in an elevator.  Remember when we would cram 12-15 people into an elevator just to get to our floor - or to the bottom floor to go home?  So many restrictions and I just don't want to be involved in it.  I'm growing content to work from home, even though I feel enclosed in here some days.  If I get rid of some of the furniture in here it would help, I think.  I am constantly backing into the bed. 

We went out to lunch yesterday (I was totally bored.... nothing was going on) to a place called Carramba's. It's a Mexican fast food type place and we hadn't tried it before.  I love Mexican food so why not.  Well, I must remind myself never to order my favorite - pollo fundido - from any place but Garcia's.  I ordered it and well, I slit the burrito open (it was covered with some icky sauce) and ate the chicken inside of it.  I as truly disappointed.  Perhaps I should stick with a taco when I go to a place like that.  I will try again, but it is also one of those $$ places, so maybe not.  Since we were across the way from Sam's Club, decided to do a stop there.  I haven't belonged to Sam's Club for a long time as Costco is a step up.  Well, it's about a mile closer now than Costco is..... and I received a flyer in a valupak that gets mailed monthly.... pay $45 for 'membership' and get a $45 gift card free.  So, technically, for one year, I don't pay anything for membership.  We didn't shop as I was on my lunch hour but may go back this afternoon, once people have been in and out the rush of the morning, and go see what they have.  I want us to start eating more fruits and vegetables and unprocessed foods.  Which means I also need to hit the recipe books and select things to make each week.  The plus of that is that one recipe can sometimes last two meals - and the rest get put into the freezer for another time.  I haven't really cooked in a long time... and I need to do it.  The crockpot won't heat the house up so that helps.  I didn't even cook dinner last night since neither of us wanted anything with eating out for lunch.  

I'm needing to bake more bread and I want to bake cookies too.... but it is too hot to do so.  Trying not to heat up the house and shutting the shutters to keep the heat out.  That means we read; I crochet; we watch movies.  Cause we don't want to go anywhere either.  Maybe I'll take the time today to actually figure out meals.  Or not.  

Nothing is planned for today - unless I run to Sam's Club to check it out.  It's too hot in the garage - even with the door open - (89 degrees in the garage yesterday afternoon - and it's already 89 degrees outside) to get on the treadmill.  I must get back into my exercise routine.  Started back on lifting my weights recently.  Trying to build strength up back in my arms and back.  With sitting all day here at home, my muscles have really gotten lax.  I need the walking and using weights to keep my body strong.  My little sister found a book the other day called Strong Women Stay Young as they were cleaning out her mother-in-law's house that was sold.  My little sister has been diagnosed with Osteoporosis and this book says she can reverse it - IF she will start lifting weights and getting exercise.  And I believe it as well - not completely, perhaps, but possibly help strengthen her bones.  After all, she tends to fall frequently and hard.  Not long ago she compressed her T12 (I think) and broke a rib.  She has 'shrunk' to 5'1", I think she said, and she was always taller than I and I'm 5'3".  Rather, I was the last time I got a physical and they measured!  I know we shrink as we age, but I try stretching all the time in hopes that I don't shrink!  I'm already short!

One more week left in my Elijah study and my little sister and I have decided to do another study - it's really a 'personal' 90 day study but we can still discuss some things - from a book by Beth Moore '90 Days with Jesus'.  I've done it before and am looking forward to going through it again.  This study on Elijah has really been good and the past two weeks really gets personal to where I squirm sometimes because I don't want to 'own up' to the question.  Ever have those times when you are reading something and it asks you a question that you don't want to answer?  What do you do?

You either shut it off in your mind and say 'I'm not going there', or you tackle the question and 'just do it'.  Right?  Sometimes we need to be honest with ourselves and speak it out.  It doesn't mean it changes anything, but sometimes it helps us to see what we are holding in and how it looks and sounds.  I know that at times - because I tend to hold so much of my thoughts inside of me - that when I speak out how I feel about something, my mind and my heart will sometimes argue over what I said.  And sometimes I realize that I have blown something out of porportion and imagined a few other incidents that make it not real.  Ever done that?  Sometimes it helps to speak what is going on in your mind and in your heart.

I started over with Matthew in my Bible reading today.  I've been jumping around in my reading for awhile because I like reading about the prophets in the Old Testament.  But something in this last week's study has stirred my heart to where I want to start 'reading the red' (or in my current Bible, 'reading the blue') and hear the words of Jesus again.  You DID know His words are in a different color in most Bibles, yes?  I remember a grandson asked for a Bible several years ago and I bought him one by Charles Stanley.  A study Bible and I thought "ok, this is a respected pastor and it should have good stuff in it."  Even had the grandson's name imprinted on it (that was when we had Christian stores close by and we could go in and place the order).  Can you imagine my dismay when we got the Bible and I opened it and the words of Jesus were NOT highlighted?  I almost didn't want to give it as a gift; but did.  I've always been disappointed in that gift.  I wanted to go through it myself and highlight every word that Jesus said!  Every Bible I have has the words of Jesus highlighted.  This one didn't and I don't know why.  But it has always bothered me.

After reading that, did you stop to check what color, if any, that your Bible has for Jesus' words?  Don't have a Bible?  Let me know and I'll send you one!  I gave one to each of my children a year or so ago... and I still pray that at some point in their lives, they will feel a tug to pick it up and start reading.  If they read nothing else... I hope they read the Gospels - Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John..... and fall in love with Jesus, just as I have.  His words teach us so much.  Whenever I struggle, all I need to do is go to Jesus and He will show me what I need to know.  I still may struggle with the answer because in my human nature "I don't wanna"! but I know that His way is always the right way.   Read the stories that are about Jesus.  They will come to life in your thoughts.

I'm going to stop here.....why don't you pick up that Bible that has been collecting dust (hopefully you know where it is) and wipe it off, and start with Matthew for now.  Read the lineage of Jesus, and learn of Him.  You will never regret it,.  Jesus gave us the New Covenant by the shedding of His blood and going to the cross for us.  We no longer have to go to a priest to confess our sins.  Jesus is our Advocate before our Heavenly Father and He intercedes for us.  Talk to Jesus.  He's waiting for you, and ready to listen.

Blessings!

It's getting hot!!

 I'm sitting here this morning, trying to put some thoughts together of what to write about and I glance down at the bottom of my laptop where it shows something I haven't noticed before. I guess because it is still before 5AM it is showing a moon.  Next to it is the temperature.  90 degrees.  At actually 4:44AM.  It is too early to be that warm!  and then those words.... Warning.   Yes, we are in a heat wave it seems.  I don't notice it too much because I am indoors all day as a rule and all evening too.  In fact, yesterday I was beginning to feel a bit enclosed, to the point I let hubby take me to lunch yesterday just to get out of here.  And then I feel the heat.  Well, I feel it when I have taken Sheeba out, but that is just out in back in once she does her business.  It is hot out here.

I saw something yesterday - and I know I won't remember it all correctly - but someone said that they were going to get their life straightened out.... if it was this hot in Arizona, then they didn't want to think about how hot hell was going to be!   I agree.  You definitely do not want to spend eternity in hell.  I'd much rather go where it is beautiful than where people are burning all the time.  What about you?  

I had a surprise last night; one of the grandsons who lives up north sent me a text.  "Hi Grandma, I want your salsa recipe.  I got a new phone and I lost your text with the recipe."  So we chatted for a few minutes and I screen print the recipe and send up to him.  It warms my heart to know my grandchildren love the salsa recipe.  There are lots of good recipes out there, no doubt.  I often laugh when people taste mine for the first time- that first taste of sweetness and many will go eeeewwww that's terrible!  But they don't try it again and get the hotness that goes with it.  I love my salsa.  But there are other salsas that I like too.  In fact, I think I have stewed tomatoes on hand and a green pepper - I think I just might back some today.  Hubby loves it and we go through it quickly.  It doesn't matter that we don't have any tortilla chips.  We have used crackers and pretzels even just to get to the taste of the salsa.  Yeah, it's that good.  For some people.  Others, not so much.  And that's ok.

I just checked my messages and my little brother had been trying to get ahold of me.  Finally got in touch with the boys.  There was a shooting nearby yesterday - not that far from us - I was thinking about 5 miles, but it may have been less than that.  Interestingly enough, when we went out for lunch yesterday and was just about two miles further south of where it was.  I heard about the shooting when my company HR sent out an email about there was a shooting on the west side of town and they had put the hospitals on lockdown.  They did catch the shooter, linked them to another random drive-by shooting, but I haven't heard the why of it happening.  Maybe I'll hear today.  Just grateful that it wasn't any closer to us.

But something to think about. The innocent people who were injured; I heard there was one killed.  Were they ready to die?  Did they get up yesterday morning and say, "well, today I'm going to get shot so I need to make sure I take a shower, fix my hair, and put on clean underwear."?  Probably not.  They probably just did what they normally do and began to live life as the do, day by day.  But what about their souls?  In the power of another, their life was taken away from them; were they ready to die?  Will those who were injured think about their lives and what - if anything - they need to take care of and change?  It should give them thought.  And it should give you and I thought.

My little sister and I often comment that we hope that when God calls us home that it is a time we aren't angry and frustrated at our hubbies!  We want to go to heaven, not hell, so we are trying harder to get along with them.  And them along with us.  We aren't to hold anger against each other.  We are to forgive, even the unforgiveable.  Sometimes that is really hard to do.  And hardness and indifference sets in and it makes it even harder to let go of some offenses. Do you find that in your own life?  I pray a lot that any hurt, any bitterness, any anger, be removed from my heart, that I will feel the joy and peace of forgiveness and love.  It isn't easy at times; it's an effort for sure.  But that is what we are called to do.  I often tell hubby that I will not let XXX keep me out of heaven.  I may not care for them, I may not approve of the things they do.  But it isn't my call.  My responsibility is that I am to love them regardless.  Sometimes loving them is the hardest thing I have to do .... but I try.  And I trust God to help me through those tough times when I need to be around them.  

Yesterday morning was sorta tough.  I was busy with work and all of a sudden I felt completely enclosed, claustrophopic in fact.  It lasted just a couple minutes, but the quick realization that I needed to get out of the house and I really wanted to spend some time....a l o n e.... was so intense.  It ws shortly after that hubby asked me to lunch and I accepted.  I needed to get out of the house.  I love people, especially my family, and I love being around them.  It's been awhile since I've been around any of them, and perhaps it was feeling lonely for them.  But yet, I do enjoy my times of solitude as well and it has been a long time since I have been able to get away by myself for any length of time.  Not to go shopping or anything like that, but to get alone in solitude with God.

I remember with great fondness my times up at the hermitage.  I need to check to see if they have changed their minds and we can still go up there.  Once Sister Theresa died, the hermitages were sold to another denomination and 'Our Lady of Solitude, House of Prayer' was only for those people and not for 'outsiders' of that denomination.  How I loved going up there and staying and being alone with God.  No talking.  No phones.  No TV or radio.  Silence.  And being in the presence of God.  I remember sitting with Sister Therese in the chapel one time and I watched her as she meditated and worshipped the Lord.  Staring out the huge windows that overlooked the valley we could see for miles.  And I knew that God was in that room, because we both were in tune with Him.  It's a treasured memory and one I hope that I never forget the importance of taking the time of being alone with God.

Do you ever have a longing within you to be alone?  Perhaps it is God letting you know that He wants to be alone with you.  I am thinking that is what I was 'hearing' yesterday.  Think I will talk with hubby and perhaps we can find some time to get away to where we can 'be alone' with God for a couple days.  I think we both could use a refreshment of His Presence.  Can you?

Blessings!

It didn't take long....

 Continuing with the story of the backyard plants.... it took maybe ten minutes to 'dig' them up.  I was going to do it, but knew hubby would be upset if I did.... but I did check.... they hadn't 'rooted out' into the ground yet so it was so easy to just pull them out of the ground and back into the pots.  Hubby took care of it when he came home from his meeting.  We ended up throwing 4 away as there didn't seem to be an new growth and they were dying.  Three looked like they were doing well so they went back into the pots and we put them in the front courtyard.  I'll deal with them this weekend.  May leave in pots and just set between my dwarf trees.  It's all done.  I do think we need to get some white gravel and put over what is back there.  Don't know if we will get anything now.... suggested artificial stuff so we don't have to water at all.  Will see.

I was somewhat productive last night.... I finished an afghan I've been working on and I also finished a book I was reading.  Hubby had asked if I wanted to watch a movie or read.... and I chose reading so was able to get it finished.  As much as I have been enjoying the movies on Up Faith & Family, need to keep them to the weekend and spend my evenings reading.  Except hubby likes his shows too.  I am so sick of Wheel of Fortune and Family Feud.  I remember my parents watching these shows - and you know how I fight about becoming like my parents!  At least when I'm watching movies I can sit and crochet or knit and complete a project!

One of my devotions yesterday was about being kind.  Today it is about loving others.  I let hubby read the one yesterday.  It seemed to cool his temper down a bit.  And he admitted being hurt by the behavior of this neighbor, as I was.  We talked about it.  And we both remembered what Pastor Steve always said....  "Angry people are hurting people".  Something triggers that anger, and it usually is because they have been hurt.  So I vote we give up the hurt we have received from this neighbor and respond in kindness and love.  And pray for our neighbor, for we don't know what is going on in his life, or what has made him so angry, so hurt.  That part is actually easy.

But it isn't always.  Do you recall being hurt deeply by someone to the point you think that you can never forgive them?  All you can think of is revenge, right?  You want everything bad to happen to them, to remove them out of your thoughts, out of your life.  I know - I've been there!  We all have at some point.  The pain is so severe that we can't let it go.  We can't ignore it.

But we can give that severe pain to God.  We can even give that minor pain to God.  He can handle all that we 'throw' at Him.  He's heard me yell at Him in my pain.  He's heard me say 'my piece' and sometimes not too nicely.  He's seen my tears, and He knows my broken heart.  

But He is my Healer of my pain.  He heals not only the hurt I hold inside, but He heals the brokenness I feel of being left out, of being put aside, of being verbally beaten up, of being mistreated, misunderstood, and torn down, criticized until I can't breathe.  He knows all this and He heals me.  He heals the broken-hearted.  

The Japanese have a way with vases.  I think it is the Japanese.  When a vase breaks, they put it back together using a gold liquid.  When the vase dries, it is a beautiful new vase with gold running all through a new design.

And that's what happens to us when we give our brokenness, our pain, to Jesus.  He takes the broken pieces of our feelings, our lives, and puts us back together.  Only He uses the blood He shed for us, covering us with it, and bringing healing, hope, and faith into us.  When we are put back together, we are a beautiful new design, fit for His use.

What's holding you back from letting God have your brokenness?  Do you think He's too busy?  Not for you.  Do you think He doesn't care?  He loves you so much, He went to the cross for you.  Do you think He doesn't want you?  Oh, He wants you so badly that He is waiting for you constantly, with open arms, waiting for you to allow Him to embrace you with His love.

What broken pieces are you holding on to?  Letting a loved one go?  Give them to Jesus.  He will comfort you in your loss.  Missing someone close to you?  Talk to Jesus about it.  (and keep in touch with them!)  Struggles in your job that causes you angst?  Talk to Jesus about it; ask Him what you should do.  Ask for wisdom, knowledge and understanding about things you need to know.  He will always provide.... but you have to ask Him for it.

Ok, I'm done.  NOW take a moment and think about what you have been holding on to.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Ask Jesus to take over the hurt, the brokenness, the pain.  Ask for peace, and love, and joy.  And let Him work in you.  By the end of the day, I promise you, if you will seek Jesus with all of your heart and ask for His intervention in your pain and sorrow and brokenness, you will see His hand upon you and you will feel His love, His peace, His presence.  Will you ask Him?

Blessings!

Actions speak louder than words....

 Just saying.  I'm pretty sure I have commented about this in previous posts, how the bushes were removed from the back next to the house to conserve water for the HOA, and we bought 7 plants and it took hubby nearly two weeks to get them all planted.  Obviously we misunderstood, and our fault, didn't clarify the 'rule' that was decided on - even with hubby being on the HOA.  We have a neighbor behind us whom hubby has tried to befriend a couple times and it seemed things were going ok.  Well, seems like this neighbor took pictures of our plants in the pots behind our house.  We had hoped they would be ok in the pots, but the wind kept blowing them over.  So - that was when it was decided to just put them in the ground.  This is where it has turned hurtful.  The neighbor behind us took photos of hubby putting the plants in the ground, and the plants being in the ground - and sent the photos and a letter to the property management stating we weren't to put plants in the ground in the back, even next to the foundation.  He had removed his own bushes right after we moved in and had put new bushes in pots next to his house.  Ok - no biggie.  We thought he did that on his own.  Long story short, he made a comment 'I guess it is ok if you are a board member'.   Which hubby is.  sigh.  Not once did this neighbor come over and ask what we were doing and give his understanding of the 'rule'.  We misunderstood it, basically.  What does it hurt to have 7 potted plants put in the ground and we water them?  The sprinkler system for that area is turned off; we don't use it.  Hubby was rightfully upset about it last night and has apologized to the president who had forwarded the information to him.   15 bushes with the sprinkler system on; 7 potted plants and we take care of the watering.... big difference in water usage.  Anyway, after Bible study this morning, hubby will be going out back and pulling up the plants.  It looks like only a few have survived the 'transplant' anyway, and we still have the pots they were in so will take them to the courtyard in front where we are responsible for the plants.  We were back there too - but they have to be in pots.  

I feel hurt - as hubby does - that the neighbor could not have come to hubby as he planted them, and questioned the rule.... instead of going straight to the property management AND sending photos of hubby and the plants.  How rude is that?  But, hubby and I had a long chat about it last night and I told him that his Christian witness was at stake.  He could be rude to the man when he comes out, or he could be kind.  The man will (hopefully) be ashamed of himself for going behind our backs, but if not, God will deal with him, not us.  We will apologize for placing the plants in the ground; it was just a misunderstanding on our part.  We may - or may not - look for larger heavier pots - and put a few plants out.... but I've lost interest in it now.

I must admit it is disheartening.  This is another reason why I miss having my own yard and not sharing a 'community yard' behind our home.  It's truly a waste of space.... a huge area and it's never used.  Landscapers come mow it every Thrusday morning.   Oh - this neighbor was also one who complained because about 4 trees have been cut down in this huge community yard to also conserve water.  One tree  was between us and kept us from seeing inside each other's house at night - we shut our blinds - no biggie - but he is furious.  Like we have nothing to do but look inside his house. Personally I think the HOA isn't researching enough, but I'm not involved and refuse to be.  Hubby is, but I'm letting him do his thing.  I'm sure he is vocal enough on some things.  

But this is where we live now so must obey the rules of the 'land'.  It makes me sad, though, that neighbors have to be like that.  The neighbors on each side of us and across the street are very nice and friendly.  It hurts to have one behind us that doesn't want to be friends.  Rude old people.  (ok, I just had to put that in!)

I took my prized picture in to be framed yesterday.  A bit more expensive than I really wanted to pay, but I wanted it done right.  It should be ready in a couple weeks.  I was trying to decide between two frames and needed advise... hubby agreed with my choice.... but I wanted outside opinion.  I emailed my boss, no response.  I emailed a photo to my sister, no response.  I emailed my brother and he responded - he liked the one I did - and then started sending me photos of a super Nova that is on google.  AND the articles under it of what it is.  It really is interesting - and I had to laugh because one of the photos is very similiar to my picture!  My boss and sister finally responded and they also agreed with our choice of frame.  YAY.  I am not an interior decorator nor try to be.  I throw something up on the wall and it sticks - and you will find it there still twenty years later.  My kids can attest to that.  I rarely - if ever - change pictures or anything else on the wall.  But I do need to find a place for this picture.  I'm thinking of moving all the graduation photos to the back room.... I know the perfect place.... and put the picture on that wall.   As I think about it, I'm doing the same thing my mother did.  All her children's graduation photos were hung up on the wall.... and I've put not only my three children (mother had 11 photos up) but started adding the grandchildren.  See, I am becoming my mother, I'm afraid.....

I was awake quite a while last night, thinking about this situation with the neighbor, and I believe I'm right.  Show him kindness.  Even apologize for upsetting him with our misunderstanding of plants being in the ground versus remaining in pots.  It's not a big deal - other than it took hubby two weeks to get them planted.  And hubby will go out this morning and dig each one up and put back in the pot and take to the front of the house.   

The golden rule 'do unto others as you would want them to do unto you' applies here.  I told hubby that perhaps this man had been reprimanded before by the former board (I have heard they were really controlling when in office) and was now retaliating.  And as hubby read me the emails that had been sent from him to the property management (and forwarded to the HOA president then to us), the man made a comment about a previous HOA board.... and I looked at hubby and just said "he has been angered by an HOA before; and now he does want to get even'.  And how we respond to this is very important.  Our actions when we see the neighbors (I've never met them as they are frequently gone for days at a time) out, we need to say hello and wave.  We can be kind; we don't need to be best friends.  But they will know that we are Christians by the way we live; not by reaction.

Think about people in your life..... has how you responded to criticism or something that you didn't like about their behavior.... has it softened your heart in trying to understand the reasons why?  Or have you hardened your heart because it made you angry and you didn't understand why they did what they did?  I can honestly say I don't understand all the dynamics in my family.  A lot of hurt flies all around.  I own it... but I let it not interfere with my love for each one.  I don't always know the entire story.

Do our actions speak louder than our words do?   Yeah.  Sometimes even our children can see our raised eyebrow and know they are in trouble!  LOL  Even Sheeba knows!  If I get after her about something, I don't yell at her; I speak her name and just say what I need to say.  She stands and stares at me and knows she did something she shouldn't do.  (like eating my scissors the other day).  After I get after her, she always comes over and nudges my hand, as if she is saying 'but do you still love me?'.  And I give her head a rub.

Psalm 19:14 (NKJV)  "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer."

Be kind.

Blessings!

He made a difference.

 I can't believe I forgot. But I totally did.  A very dear friend's birthday was June 2nd and I always, for the past - oh my! nearly 50 years! could that be right? - sent him a birthday card.  I also send a Christmas card, and he always sent me one.  But the past couple of years I have heard nothing from him.  No notes, no cards.  I wondered if he had passed on. I googled his name, and found nothing.  I tried dex-online and still nothing.  I let his birthday go without sending a card, but I had to know.  So I wrote his son, whom I had also worked with, and he lived with his dad.  The son emailed me last week that his dad had just turned 97, was still alive, and was always saying "only the good die young".    I got his telephone number and said I'd call on Saturday around noon their time - 9AM our time.

I totally forgot.  I did not think of it at all until yesterday morning as I was starting to sign on my work computer - and then I remembered.   I sent a quick email and asked if I could call at noon Monday.  No response.  At 9AM our time I decided to just call anyway.  Sure enough, he was eating lunch but his son said that he knew his dad would love to talk with me.  So we talked about 10 minutes and it was so fun.  Granted, we didn't have much to talk about; he did ask about each of my children as he knew of each one.  I also asked about his children.  I kept the call brief and told him I will make a note to call him every few weeks just to touch base.  And wished him a happy belated birthday.

Why is this man so important to me?  I met him in January 1975 when I went to work at Peachtree Fabrics Inc. in the customer service department.  My youngest had been born October 1974 and I needed to go to work.  After about 3 months, the bookkeeper was fired and they needed a new one.  For some reason, the president of the this very small company (it had only been open a very few months) thought I had potential.  He and the vice president approached and asked if I would be interested.  I had no confidence in myself and didn't think I could.  But this president of this company thought I had potential.  He asked me to take the position and he and our CPA would train me.

So I did.  I caught on quickly and soon I exceeded my own expectations.   It didn't take long and I was doing payroll for the office and the sales people, figuring commissions, writing checks, approving credit orders, processing orders, payments.... and a lot of other things.  I was added as secretary of the corporation.  Everything I did 'way back when' was completed by hand.  I kept all the books manually.  I wrote all the checks manually.  I posted charges and payments on a Burroughs machine.  About 5-6 years later we got this huge contraption called a computer.  I ran the 'computer department' in addition to bookkeeping as it was kept in my room.  I loved that job.  The CPA and I would challenge each other every month that we met to go over the books.... we'd see who could tally up on the calculator all the numbers the fastest - and I loved to beat him!  

I tell you all this because that is part of my life.  This man that I called yesterday morning was the one who believed in me and gave me confidence in myself.   He took the time to say 'you can do it, I believe in you'.  He invested his time in me to make sure I understood the importance of the job and how to do it the right way.  I was sad when he left the company and moved on, but we have always kept in touch.  I remember making him a pistachio cake one year for his birthday because he loved pistachios.  His son, who is now 65, worked in the warehouse a few summers so I became acquainted with him as well.  I still have a cheese plate that he gave me one year for my birthday.  On the wooden plate he had placed a piece of wax in the shape of cheese and put a small ceramic mouse in it.  A glass dome covers the dish.  I haven't used it often... but I still have that dish - minus the 'cheese' and mouse.

Who do you have in your life (or have had) who believed in you?  Who took the time to value you?  Perhaps it is a friend who encouraged you when you were down.  Perhaps it is your spouse who told you often how treasured you are.  Perhaps it is your child who makes you feel so blessed just because they look up to you.  Perhaps it is a boss who saw value in your and taught you all you know about that area of expertise.  Have you taken the time to let them know how much you appreciate their value, their trust, in you and in your abilities?

Over the years I have often told my former boss of how much I treasure the lessons I learned from him.  I gained internal value because someone believed I could do something different.

It's like Thomas the train engine..... I think I can, I think I can..... and wasn't afraid to try.  And he made it over the mountain.

Perhaps you can't think of anyone who has made you feel valued as I did.  But you know what, YOU can be that person to someone else.  You can be that person to your spouse.  You can be that person to your child.  You can be that person to a friend.  Think about it.  How can you (possibly) step out of your comfort zone and give a word of encouragement and hope to someone today?  Tell them "I believe in you.  I will walk with you in this journey.  I will help you over the tough times.  I will be here for you."

Sounds a bit like our Lord, doesn't it?  Jesus is always telling you that He believes in you.  He will walk with you in this journey of life, regardless of where it leads you.  He will give you the wisdom you need to complete that task.  He will encourage you to succeed and do even better than you did the day before. He will pick you up when you fall, brush you off, and set your feet on solid ground - if you will let Him.  He is always here for you.  And when you are a follower of Jesus, one of our goals is to be like Him.  

Stop right now and think about someone who could use some encouragement in their day.  Grab a piece of paper and write them a note to encourage them.  Pick up the phone an call (or text) them that you are thankful for them.  

Believe in yourself, for our God does not make junk.  You have value, and a high price was paid for you.  Jesus gave His life up for you, and for me.  He loves and treasures and values us - loves and treasures and values YOU so much, He chose to take all our sins and nail them to the cross.  His body was beaten and scarred, His blood flowed, because He loves you so much.  Thank Him.

There is no greater love, than what Jesus displayed for us.  And we are to show that love to others.  Tell someone today they have value.

Begin with yourself.

Blessings!