I just want to sleep this off....

 My runny nose has now turned into a cold, I'm afraid.  I took so much medication last night I was actually afraid that some was going to counteract with another!  And, will be making a trip down to the drugstore this morning to see what I can pick up for running nose and coughing.  I usually get Robitussin DM as my colds generally get down in the chest.  It sure makes me talk deep!  LOL  And, with this cold - and hubby walking around coughing, (of course I had to share!  Or did he share with me?), I have already told him we are staying home for new years day.  Unless we can get rid of these symptoms, anyway. I don't know where we could have picked it up - it could have been one of the kids over the weekend, but none seemed to have a cold or not feel good.  It could have been church on Sunday morning, although no one was coughing or seemed to not be well (trust me, old people stay home when they don't feel good! Hardly anyone was at church! (compared to the past).  I went to Safeway on Monday... but I already had a sore throat that morning (thinking I slept with my mouth open) so I don't think it was anything there. Anyway, I'm determined to beat this stupid cold.  Lemon and honey in hot water to conquer the throat and coughing.  I'm not sure what else to get since I don't usually get sick.  Will have to read labels!

And, since I slept instead of writing in here this morning, of course I am 'late'.  But it doesn't really matter, does it - just mindless ramblings.

Our yearly 21 day fast is coming up and I am getting the usual discussions from hubby.  Alongside Free Chapel, we agree to wait until Sunday, January 4 to begin our fast and go through January 25.  What to give up?  I want to do the Daniel Fast - just fruits and vegetables.  Hubby, of course, insists we need meat - such as fish and chicken.  Then I suggest the BBCD - which is more difficult than it sounds - beef, bread, chocolate and desserts.  I'm leaning towards to Daniel Fast as I need to 'purge' my body of all the junk food I have eaten the past few months.  Especially in December, which is probably why my body is worn down (amongst other things) and I have caught a cold.  Was not eating like I should. And I do know better, but it is oh so good.

I got a very nice surprise from my sister yesterday - it's a shawl electric blanket - so soft and when it is plugged in and turned on, so warm.  I really didn't NEED it... but I guess she got one for Christmas and she knows how cold I can get when hubby plays with the thermostat.  (I think that might be a lot of it as well for my cold.  He couldn't comprehend a lot of people = a lot of heat and so we were all sweaty and I'd go outside to cool off.)  Anyway - I did try it out yesterday and it was really cool.  Or warm.

Sue decided yesterday to take today off work as she didn't have any meetings on the calendar.  I could have, but decided I'd try to get some things done.   I DID get one set of minutes completed and the PowerPoint slide deck put in the folder and ready for them to insert their information.  Still need to do one other.  And get the new board set up. We do have a Teams folder for it now.  

I am also working Friday, but Sue said I could take off at 1PM to get ready for our 'retreat weekend' - sure hope I'm feeling better - and hubby as well.  Although I just plan to read and rest anyway, I guess it doesn't make much difference.  And using reward points, we only have our meals to pay for.

Whew - that was close!  Someone (work) sent me an email to check their timecard - and when finished (because I am typing this on my work computer), I clicked off - and everything disappeared.  Luckily, it had saved in draft form.  Lucky for me, anyway.

And with that, I need to get off here and get some things done. Got a combo box to pick up again today - wonder what will be in it - they called it a 'mystery box'.  The last one I got I didn't like.  It had food I don't cook - but was able to give a lot of it away. 

Since I keep getting interrupted (how dare they!) I will close this off. Maybe the new year will be better - for all of us.

Blessings - and Happy New Year!

Whew - it WAS a mistype!

 I read my son's blog this morning and he shared his Monday with his readers - and he corrected himself (if he even realized he mistyped the day before) and gave his weight after his paracentesis.  THAT made me feel a bit better!  He still has 100+ pounds on me!  My eating habits must improve or I will be joining him, I'm afraid!

We had leftover soup for lunch yesterday.  I wish hubby wouldn't nag at me about eating. Just because HE always eats.... sigh.  But I didn't eat until about 2PM (don't tell me what to do!) and then about 5PM, I decided I wanted a ten minute nap. After working yesterday, I just felt completely exhausted. Took a ten minute nap, woke up and wanted MY tacos.  (can't stand taco bell anymore)  So off to Safeway - who, although a bit more expensive, to me they have the best and freshest meat.  AND, I buy the hamburger from the deli and you don't get that stringy hard ground beef.  Some of you know what I mean.  Came home, cooked up some of the beef, added taco seasoning, then when done, heated up a tortilla in the microwave, put the meat in, added tomato, onions and lettuce, and salsa and cheese and sour cream...and mmm o so good!  Simple, quick, and yummy.  

I decided yesterday I/we needed to get away for the weekend.  I'm tired. These four walls are enclosing me. And I need to get refocused on God for the new year coming quickly.  I had points on my credit card so used 53K of them for two nights at a hotel about 15 minutes away.  Of course that made hubby happy.  sigh. Yes, I have to include him; he would never let me go stay by myself.  I've even offered to get us both our own rooms - and he refuses.  He's so afraid of 'losing' me he has to keep me in his sight or very close by.  I want to be alone with God for 2-3 days.  He wants to be alone with me. And God.   Rolling my eyes here.  Clingy, yes.

Ok - just deleted a few paragraphs.  Why? Because you don't need nor want to hear my every comment and thought that runs through my head.  This isn't a daily journal - and yet, I guess it is, right?  Glad I have a new journal to take with me on the getaway this weekend.  I CAN write down my thoughts with God.  He does like to 'read' them. :-) 

Started a new book last night - no way I will get it completed before the end of the year - and no, I did not meet goal for 2025 in Goodreads.  Just checked - got 47 out of 50 books read.  I have a few I'm reading, so at least should have a good start for 2026, once I finish them.  I'll leave my goal at 50 books until I achieve it - or go beyond it.  December was a tough month this year or I think I could have made it.  But - I didn't.  'it is what it is', right?

John 16:33 (NIV):  "I have told you these things, so that in me you will have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

Yeah, there were and are lots of things that cause me to over-stress and be frustrated - and it seems to happen more when I get my eyes off Jesus and on to the situation.  How many times do we do that?  We focus on the problem, instead of focusing on the SOLUTION to the problem.  We catch a cold and focus on how many times we sneeze or cough, or how often we blow our nose... instead of let's take a pill that will cause the symptoms to fade (some) - and go on with life (which is what I think I am going to have to do - catching a cold I think).  I don't need to 'tough out' a cold.  Take a pill, right?

Or work. I could go there too.  I can continue to mention (and do) and whine I don't have the minutes completed.  It will take me less than 30 minutes to do.  JUST DO IT, right?  

What about you? What are you putting off and every single day you add it to the list of things to do?  (like me, cleaning out your closet). 

When we lean into Jesus, and give the problem, the situation, to Him, we can have peace.  We can't change the outcome, but Jesus can.  Sometimes we are to let the situation play out. Sometimes we need to intervene and do something.  Other times, we need to just let Jesus handle it.  And that is the hard part. We always want to 'fix' it.  At least I do.  No matter what it is.

And the 'fixing' I need to do right now - I need to be fixing to get my body up and moving this morning as it is about time to get the work computer on.  But even in that, I have peace.  I learned many years ago to give each day to Jesus - no matter what is ahead of me.  Some things He takes care of for me, and other things He allows me the time to get them done. He can take any situation and make it better - when I rely on Him.  Trust Him. Take Him at His Word.  His Word will never fail you.  You can 'take that to the bank'.

Blessings!              

The pounding head is back

 and I know I need to start eating better.  Chocolate and other candies, loads of carbs, let alone all the 'other' stuff in food, has and is taking its toll on my head and my body.  I've gained weight in the past two weeks!  I've got to start being more selective on what I eat, and not eat so much of it!  Are you in the same boat as me?  My oldest son posted his weight this morning - and I weigh more than he does!  That can not remain that way!

Our remaining Christmas celebration was last night and I think (other than my irritation at hubby) all had a good time.  Son and DIL helped clean off the table and rinse dishes and it was a great help to finish up later.  Yeah - we had the same soups as before - chili, split pea, and potato and ham.  And other than keeping a little back for hubby and I to finish, we sent the rest 'home' with the others.  They loved having 'Uncle Ralph's'  cherry delight too.  

I didn't get up at 4AM as I usually do.  My head was pounding and I just didn't want to get up.  But, by about 4:30AM, hubby was making his grunting noises - or maybe it was I wasn't in a deep sleep as I had been and every noise keeps me awake.  Anyway, I finally got up and came in here, hoping to curl up in my chair for a bit more catnap - only our neighbors - not sure which one, possibly the 'new' ones - has a windchime.  And, apparently, the wind is blowing where that windchime is.  What is really a beautiful sound, is really annoying in the very early morning hours.  Yes, I do have a windchime, but I have crochet'd a covering for the 'bell' and it doesn't 'chime'.  It just looks pretty.  If the wind does hit it, it bangs against the house.  If it did make noise, I would take it down for I am that considerate of others.  I hope our neighbors are kept awake by their chime and will do the same.  :-)

Christmas celebrations are over and the trees are empty underneath.  I was going to leave all the decorations up until after our Bible study here on the 7th, but I'm already ready to take it all down, and plan to this weekend.  I will possibly start on it Friday morning, when hubby is gone.  I honestly do not want his help.  I want him to leave me alone and let me sort it all out and put it away.  I do not want his intervention, his offers of help, or his suggestions.  Leave me alone and let me get the job done - right?!  Things get put away haphazardly when he starts giving me his 'suggestions' and his 'help'.  He doesn't HELP, he ANNOYS.  Sorry, not sorry, but he does. Maybe I'm just still tired and cranky this morning?

The message at the RV park went well yesterday.  At one point I mentioned that peace could be had if people would just quit their 'what if' and 'it could happen' comments.  Some of you may know what I'm talking about.  Hubby is good at that.  To the point it drives me to madness.  After yet another one of his comments that cracker crumbs can get on the floor.... I turned to him and said "did you not listen at all to the message this morning!?  He gave me his 'look' - you don't know the one he saves for me - and I'll leave that there - but I got the 'look' with the loud comment "Don't you start it!"    He knew exactly what I was referring to.  I told him we still have a sweeper (although it hasn't been used in several years) and I still knew how to use it.  He commented back that he did as well!  He hasn't used it in a longer time than I have.  (erase erase erase)  Ok - on to another subject - I'm saying things that are in my head and heart and I shouldn't be saying them at all, let alone on here.

Back to work today but the next couple of days should go fairly smooth and I should be able to get some things done.  I'm referring to work things, but I can also start again in this room and get it put away.  I've save the Christmas things until Friday morning when hubby is gone. At least most of them. If I get the minutes done today, the new slide decks (powerpoint) get put in the files, a new Teams folder created by the end of the week - I'll be doing good for work.  

Please pray for me for patience. It's wearing real thin right now.  Although I don't like asking God for patience for that is when life generally throws you all kinds of things to deal with.  I'm not too sure I can handle much more right now.  I do know, as mentioned many times already, I need to change my diet.  I am feeling extremely tired and weary and I'm pretty sure it's food-related.  Possibly age related too - but I have only missed a week of the gym - why am I so weary.  I've got to find my joy again in living.

I will be needing a second cup of coffee this morning.  I would really like to just take the day off and relax but why?  It would just give more opportunities for me to be annoyed.  (ya think?) Oh Lord Jesus, HELP!!

I've got to find my strength.  Ah - and the scripture comes to mind....

Habakkuk 3:18 (ESV):  yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation.

We are often told not to take joy in man or in the things around us.  They are there, and then they are not.  But the thing that lasts is our salvation in Jesus Christ, and in that we can have joy.  I need to find my joy again in living life, but I know I have joy in serving the God of my salvation.  He is the only reason I am still here.  He is the only reason I am who I am today.  My joy is found in Jesus alone.  I need to remind myself of that - no matter how often I need to do that!

I need to get alone by myself and re-evaluate my walk with Jesus - am I living the way I know I should live - or have I allowed outside influences to disturb my walk and cause me to turn away from what is right and give in to the influences.... I need to find me again.  

Have you ever felt that way?  Like you have lost your way?  I can speak from experience - I still often feel I am not (and can not be) myself.  I am learning that as people age, they get worse.  Lord, please help me not to become edgy and irritable around those I love.  

Wow - a bunch of what I just wrote has erased itself... I guess that is a sign that I should not say the things I was running through my mind. I know I share more on here than I I should... but it is my personal journal of release.  I hope my struggles in this life may help you find your way to Jesus.  Yes, I fall down so many times; I let people get to me.  

But one thing I do know.  Jesus will never fail me. I may not get the prayers answered that I want answered.  I may not get responses from people that I want.  I may not see where I can live life again, but one thing I know.  My life changes, but Jesus never does.  He is steadfast.  He is true. He is always with me, always there.  And He is my best friend.  I love Him more than I love myself, or anyone else. And I know He loves me unconditionally, even when I screw up.  I can trust Him with my very life.  

And so can you.  January 1 is coming quickly - I want 2026 to be a better year.  I want to find joy again.  Join me in this journey?  

Blessings!

Two down and one to go!

 What a day yesterday was!  I had so much fun unwrapping my gifts!  I laughed so much; I couldn't believe all the fun wrapping there was!  Just a few examples - I love fun socks.  From my granddaughter in this family, she wrapped each sock individually.  Then she took one of each pair (12 of them!) and wrapped them in another wrapping - and instead of one present with 12 pairs of socks, I had 2 big packages, with 12 halves in each one to unwrap!  I was puzzled at first, but figured it out.  Then there is the large package from my son and his wife - and it was mint candy.  And in this large package, every.single.piece.of.candy was wrapped.  I have to unwrap each piece to eat it!  No, I still haven't gotten through them all!  But what fun they must have had in wrapping - and I definitely had fun in unwrapping!  I got so many gifts and I love each one.   I even got a t-shirt I can't wait to wear and send a photo to my sister - it says "Jesus loves you."  And under that it has "but I'm His favorite".  Love it!  Bookmark, cards, candy, chocolate, a beautiful handmade jacket, gift cards, and so much more!  What a good day!

Lunchmeat sandwiches for lunch along with salad and potato chips finished up the day.  I loved that they all stayed for awhile after we ate and we could just 'be' together.  No rushing to get out the door.  My heart hurt for my son, who didn't seem to feel well.  But he knows what he has to do.  I keep praying for God's intervention, for a miracle, and I will not stop. It was such fun having that extra time with my granddaughter and grandsons and their families - and my son and daughter in love.   

Although I love having everyone at the same time, I'm grateful for the one on one time I get with each branch of my little family.  I can focus on each one and no one counts how many gifts one sibling gets over another.  Just saying. You know there is always competition.

Ouch.  My arthritis in my fingers seems to be active lately.  The knuckles in my right hand are still moveable, but one especially is swollen and very sore.  I guess 'old age' brings out the best in all of us, huh!  I just rub cream on it and move on.  All these years of typing almost every single day has taken its toll on my knuckles, for sure.

Today we have church at the RV park.  I thank God that He reminded me last night, after everyone left, that I still hadn't finished pulling together the message!  I had worked on it yesterday morning, but had laid it aside.  Once we cleaned up everything and had the dishwasher going, I remembered and within the hour had finished it to completion.  I set it aside and have finished making changes this morning. Just printed off the 'final product' and will put in my folder.  The rest is up to God.  I give Him all the glory, all the credit for anything that happens - including the delivery of said message!  I certainly can't do it on my own, so ask the Holy Spirit to deliver it, for He can do a much better job of it than I can in my own power. Lord, take this message and use it for Your glory alone.

After church I will be starting another round of soup.  I was able to pass on the soup we had the other night.  One grandson took the leftover potato soup and the leftover chili.  I think hubby was happy about that - with fixing it again today, he is going to get tired of it.  Yeah, I'll start the split pea and ham, the potato soup and ham, and the chili as soon as I get home.  Just remembered I don't have shell macaroni - oh well.  I do have other pasta that we can use.  I doubt if this family cares.  I hope the soups and chili come out as good as they did the other night - at least I thought they were all good.  I love a good soup.

Christmas again with the youngest son and his family this afternoon.  Looking forward to see if they like everything.  AND, we get to see the newest great-granddaughter.  I have loved so much having the great-grandchildren around.  Yesterday we had two great-granddaughters with us - the baby even walked to me and mama was able to record her steps!  The oldest is full of energy and has warmed up to us.  Well, to me, I guess.  I hope to get to see them in the spring in their city.  Which is MUCH closer than another one.... and I'll leave it at that.  An hour and a half drive is much better and easier on us 'old folks' than a ten hour one.  Just saying.

Today my message is on peace.  How I wish our family had peace.  Peace that passeth all understanding.  Only Jesus can give that.  We may not always get along with others, but peace is always needed.  We shouldn't wait until life ends, or changes, to realize how important that one was in our lives.  That's one reason I keep in touch with all my siblings.  Always have.  Some of my siblings haven't talked in years.  They don't have to like me.  But I insist on keeping in touch.  I want to be a part of their lives.  I want them to be a part of my life.  Having memories is sometimes the one thing that helps us in times of grieving and sorrow.  I miss my three siblings that are gone.  I miss them being a part of my life, and me a part of theirs.  Life is short.  Love your family with all your heart.  

Romans 5:1 (NLT):  Therefore, since we have been made right in God's sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.

The Bible says that when we confess our sin, God is willing, so willing, to forgive our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  God wants to be right with us - and all we have to do is pour out our hearts to Him.  I feel that sometimes we blame our circumstances on Him, that He didn't prevent our 'problems'  - whatever they might be.  God is faithful.  He loves you more than His own Son, whom He sacrificed for you.  I can't bear the thought of losing one of my children.  Yet, God did that for us.  For you and for me.  So that we could be 'made right in God's sight by faith'. 

Take a few moments and talk with Jesus about what is going on in your mind; in your life; in your family.  He already knows it, so why not talk with Him about it and ask Him how He can help you through it.  Don't allow stubbornness to get in the way of Peace, of Hope, of Healing, of Restoration, of Salvation.  Jesus is the only way to the Father.  Tell Jesus all about it; ask Him to intervene as your Advocate to the Father.  Jesus loves you (but I'm his favorite).  Let Him be your best friend.

Blessings!

It's always about the thought behind it...

 We had a good time with our daughter and family yesterday as we opened gifts before diving into food.  I discovered, while opening gifts, that my daughter got one that I thought I had put in the closet for her birthday next month.  So - the gift she was to get for Christmas, will obviously be her birthday gift now. Oh well.  I think they were all happy with their gifts from us.  I hope everyone will like their gifts today.  At one point last night I about panicked - remember my mentioning I was afraid I had forgotten someone?  Our grandson in law was sitting on the floor next to our great-granddaughter, and I didn't see any gifts around him - I can just imagine the look on my face when I had that thought - and when I asked him, he assured me that he did have a couple gifts, but they were mixed in with the great-granddaughter's.  Whew.  

Why is it always the boys that I have the hardest time with on getting gifts?  In fact, for one grandson, I have a bag set aside, for I think I only got him one gift, and the others got at least two.... but I didn't want to dig through all the gifts and count (again) so if it appears he was shorted (ok, it's my thing; they have to have the same amount), then I have a 'snack bag' to give him.  

And yes, NEXT year things will be different.  I know, I say that every year.  Girls are so much easier to buy for.  And when I'm not involved in the boys' lives, I don't know what they like, enjoy (well, except for beef jerky), or want.  But everything I get is done in 'love'. So there!  I know I overbought snacks - I've said that before.  I can't believe how much I bought! What can I say? I love my children and when they mention snacks... they get them. And that is all I'll say about that!

Got my second cup of coffee and finished off a small package of powdered donuts.  I forgot to turn off the tree lights outside so when I opened the door to turn them off, I grabbed a package.  Yum.  Hey - got to get rid of the snacks now that Christmas is over, right?  No, I didn't put any donuts in the stockings.  You are welcome.  My daughter must have read about the donuts (or I mentioned it to her about the conversation with my son) for she commented she didn't get any.  

Speaking of the daughter, she hobbled her way in with the walker and we had a chair in which she could sit comfortably and get out of fairly easy.  I know she felt bad she couldn't get up and help like she usually does, but I had everything under control.  Today's lunch will be more simple with sandwiches... but I'm still a bit nervous if I bought enough meat.  I even bought bologna as my son said to. LOL  I personally like bologna; I grew up on it.  But hubby doesn't so haven't bought it in years.  We used to put four slits on the sides to make it lay down flat, and fry it up in a skillet.  Hmm. I wonder if anyone still does that. Memories of the past can come at fun times. Just saying.

My son and family should be here around 1PM-ish and I'm looking forward to seeing them all.  Lunch will be easy so don't need to start on it for a couple hours yet.  I'm excited to see them all.  It seems so rare that I get to see any of them.  It's a 'coming home for Christmas' moment for me. :-) And that's a good thing.

I also need to finish up the message for tomorrow morning - yes, I still haven't gotten that message completed.  It will take a few more hours to complete.  It will be done in time - and if not, I have others that I can pull out and do.  

Although I had to work yesterday, and I did get a lot of things done (but not the minutes, sigh).  Sue didn't have any meetings on her calendar for yesterday so she said she was going to get other things done around the house.  She shut down her computer and did just that!  I checked messages and made meetings throughout the day but there was nothing urgent.  Still have some things to start on Monday morning.  

Distractions keep coming to me this morning and I 'fall' for them.  Found myself on Amazon and Thriftbooks checking out titles of books I thought of!  Me and my books!  I really do want to take more time to read this year.  Not that it is a bad thing, but hubby has all the time in the world to do his reading in the mornings.... unfortunately, I can't get very far in the mornings because I need to work.  So when I'd rather read in the evenings, he wants to watch a movie most nights.  I need to start standing my ground.  He doesn't 'read' when I do at night, he 'listens' to all the garbage on his phone.  How can ANYone sit and stare at their phone all evening is beyond me!  I've rarely gotten on facebook; usually when someone I know posts something.  I have tried really hard not to do the 'scroll' thing.  I waste way too much time on needless, mindless scrolling, when I could be reading a good book!  Maybe I can use that as my 'goal' for this year?  

Sigh, and yet, I know I'm not going to make my goal for this year - I think I hit 47 out of 50 - so close to 'goal' - and yet, so far away.  I will leave my goal at 50 for 2026 and will work towards making it.  

And I need to get up and get busy this morning - got to work on this message some. My distractions (looking at books, going through goodreads, etc.) keep me un-focused.  Only have a couple hours this morning so need to get going.

So - with that - I'm off here!  Hope you have an amazing day!  Enjoy your Saturday!

Blessings!

My family Christmases begin...

 Yesterday was a quiet day, although it was Christmas.  I mentioned in yesterday's post of how our morning went.  Or started, anyway.  It was 'different'... but I guess very similar as last year.  When no one came over.  I did get two batches of bread made (hubby wanted one batch to take to his friends today) and another batch I will probably put in the freezer.  Just remembered I forgot to wrap them in plastic wrap last night so they sat out all night. Oh well.  Will figure out what to do with them.  Or did I wrap them. I don't remember. (I just went to make a 2nd cup of coffee; I did wrap them yesterday. All good.)

I made a batch of salsa to finish off what I needed. Or think I need. I cooked us dinner (yes, I actually cooked)... and then txtd Ms. Vicky to see if she wanted company.  Two days in a row!  She said yes, of course. I felt bad for her; her daughter went to Nebraska to have Christmas with her sister and family, and Ms. Vicky is all alone. Literally.  So I visited for an hour or so. Hubby and I (mainly I) watched a movie; hubby slept through most of it.  Then it was bedtime.  Hubby had awakened and seemed not ready to go to bed yet - but I did, so he did.  It was a very quiet day.  I did take a nap, and worked on the message for Sunday.  Got to really focus on that today - and yes, I'm working today as well, but it should be fairly quiet.

Awakening with another headache this morning, I don't want to work.  I know, what else is new.  But Sue and I are working and know that it will be a very light day, although I have noticed that Brett sent me several things to do - and as mentioned before, I still have board minutes to type. But I can't quit my job - not yet.  I've just got to find my joy in working again.  In fact, I just need to find my joy in living.

About noonish I will start working on soups for tonight's dinner as my daughter and her family will be coming over to 'celebrate Christmas' with us.  I have three days in a row of 'celebration' coming up.  Really looking forward to seeing my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren.  They are truly my joy and I love just being with them.  Some I only see once or twice a year.  Not their fault, it's just life.

I really do need to get organized. 

Yeah, I look around this room and groan.  I have in my closet, at least, a box that I have started putting things in.  I have suits hanging in my closet I have had since about 2010 at least.  I have not worn them at all (I can't get my fat butt in them!)  since about then. Why do I hang on to them?  I like the suits.  But, I think it is 'time' to let them go, don't you?  I need to spend a day in my closet and start going through faded t-shirts, skirts I can no longer wear (or won't wear), and even sweaters and tops.  Surely I can make 2026 a year of 'letting go', can't I? 

It's hard to believe that 2026 is just around the corner.  Ms. Vicky asked me last night what were my new years resolutions.  I told her that I haven't made 'resolutions' for several years.  Why? Because of something my oldest son said years ago. I don't remember exactly what it was, but something about making resolutions you will break, or setting goals that you can achieve.  So what goals do I want to achieve? I haven't even thought about it.  I should be thinking about those goals and even write them down.  Maybe even give myself dates to reach that goal, and make myself accountable. That would be different.  Even when I've asked someone to make me accountable, they forget.  And I don't dare ask hubby to hold me accountable; you know how that would go - and end.  

So, I will pause and think about some goals to make for 2026 - and I may or may not share on here.  So if you were going to set a goal, what would that be? Would you want to share it?

I miss hearing from my oldest son. I have a great imagination and it isn't being nice.  I try not to 'worry' (cause worry is a sin), but I am very concerned for him.  So I do what I can do - and that is place him in God's hands and ask God to watch over him.  There is a song that frequently comes to mind, and when it does, I pray it over my son.  There is a verse that says 'Dead things come to life' and I have been praying for him, that what is dead (or dying), would come to life again.  I am looking for a miracle to happen.  2026 may be the year I intensify that prayer.  I still believe in miracles, even if mine do not happen the way I want them to.

I started reading in Genesis in my Bible the other day.  Starting to read the Bible from cover to cover - again.  I love the old testament stories because they build on each other. And then that leads us to the New Testament.  I've gotten started before January 1, and that is ok, but I do like to read through the Bible each year.  A sense of accomplishment.  Would you accept a challenge to read through your Bible in 2026?  Yes, there are some very boring books (think Numbers, or even parts of Leviticus), but if you persist, you will get to some great stores.  You may even find answers to some questions you may have.  Or what about starting with the New Testament?  Start with Matthew and read the four gospels.  I read a book once that a new Christian wrote and he said that he 'read the RED' - which are the words of Jesus. Give yourself a goal and 'just do it'.  Even if you don't think you will get anything out of it. Even if you don't believe.  Read through the Bible, and then you can share with others, you read through the Bible. Even if only once.

I think I'm going to stop here for today. A verse is not coming to mind to share. I have other things on my mind that I think is preventing that, but know this...

You are loved by God.  He created you in His image.  Whatever is going on with you - or within you - or around you - is not missed by Him.  Sometimes things happen to get our attention.  Sometimes things happen to get others attention.  But our attention should be on the One who created us.

We had a friend pass away yesterday, from our former church. The one we went to for over 30 years. I am pretty sure my children remember her.  She's been in the hospital lately, and they found out in the last few days she had stage 4 cancer in her body.... she went to hospice yesterday and passed away.  Christmas Day. I am sure she is celebrating in heaven with Jesus.  I never thought to let my DIL know, for I am sure she knows her.  I'm sure she doesn't read in here, so if my son reads, will let him be the one to let her know. Or I will let her know tomorrow when they come over. 

Death isn't always to bring grief; it can also bring joy.  Celebrating life while it is lived, and celebrating the life that was.  I don't expect people to dance with joy when I pass.... but I do want them to celebrate that I lived.  Good and bad.  Lessons learned.  Does that make sense?

No matter what your life is, you need to be celebrated for who you are.  You are created by God, created in His image.  And God doesn't make mistakes.  Grieving happens.  And that's ok. It's our way of missing someone.  But celebrate their life.  Celebrate your life while you yet live.

Something to think about.

Blessings!

It's a fun Christmas morning....

 We both awoke early, as we usually do.  Getting up first, I brought hubby's stocking out and put on his chair while he was getting up.  I really did buy too much junk food (aka snacks).   Once hubby got our coffee, we settled in the front room and I found a 'fireplace burning' on You Tube and hubby started passing out our gifts for each other.  My big brother had sent me some gifts so I opened those first. He had me laughing.  I love that he gave me a diamond art project with a fireplace and a Christmas tree.  That will be a project to complete and have hanging on my wall next year!  

Hubby got me nearly everything I had on my 'list' for him to look at.  I got tennis shoes, socks, 4-5 work out shirts, a sweater that I would consider putting in the 'ugly sweater contest' as I don't see myself wearing it (at all) much, lots of dark chocolate (as each year I try to say (and mean) I am cutting back on junk food, gift card, a red hoodie, another pullover jacket, well, I am drawing a blank, but I got a lot of nice things from hubby.  He seemed to like all he got as well. He especially liked the Fitbit I got him.  Morgan was glad I got him one; he complains every time with the Spade he has.  He was surprised and excited, and asked if I'd help him get it set up today.

We did go to the 2PM Christmas Eve service at our church yesterday.  Finally wore a dress that I had bought last summer - it's long and it's red. :-)  Paired with a black sweater and shoes, it matched my plaid purse. :-)  Afterwards I decided I wasn't cooking, so we went to Olive Garden for dinner.  It was a nice dinner and I got a couple $6 meals to bring home. Was going to give one to Ms. Vicky, but forgot to take it to her last night.  Yes, I finally made it over to visit last night. She was very happy to see me. 

My daughter gets discharged from rehab about 10AM today.  She plans to rest today... but we will see how that goes. LOL  I'm sure the daughter and granddaughter will be over to visit before the day is out - they may even decided to do their Christmas tonight.  They all will be over here tomorrow around 5-ish I'm thinking - and we'll open gifts with them.  Saturday with my oldest son, and Sunday evening with the youngest.  My favorite time is spending it with my children.

Which reminds me, I received a package last night and I didn't know who it was from.  The card read (something like) "To an AMAZING mom, time got away from me but love reminded me.  Merry Christmas." - I checked with all three of my children and it wasn't them - and as I checked with the last one, I remembered my adopted daughter in Georgia... and sure enough, it was from her.  We usually send cookies to each other in December - but as you know, my December was sorta turned upside down this year - and I totally forgot to send cookies.  She did too - except I got these delicious cookies (of course I ate one!) yesterday.   So sweet she remembered me.  I will bake a batch of cookies and pick up a small gift for her and send this next week or so.  Time truly got away from me as well.

Isaiah 9:6 (ESV):  For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Today is the day we celebrate the birth of Christ.  I wonder how many will even pause to think of Him today.  Will we all be so busy with our unwrapping and gift giving, meal preparations, that we forget about the REASON we even celebrate this day?  I pray not.  Hubby and I have retreated to our separate areas to spend time with Jesus this morning.  Of course if my kids were coming over today, I'd probably also be in the kitchen.  But with no one coming over, we have the entire day to do whatever. ($10 says we will probably watch a Christmas movie sometime today)  But now that our gifts are opened, it's time for Jesus.  Afterwards, I'll fix breakfast for us.   Then I still have salsa to make and another batch of breads to make .

I love this time alone in the room.  I thought about sitting out in the front room, it was cozy with the 'fireplace' going, crackling and popping.... but I like having the door shut.  Interruptions are held at a minimum.

Oh - by the way, the bed WAS cleared off last night - except for stockings.... and material.  But, alas, it is starting to fill up again.  Ok - soon, it will be cleaned off again.  All this Christmas 'stuff' will go out in the garage.  It's hard to believe this year is quickly approaching the end of 2025.  I work tomorrow - if you want to call it that.  My boss and I both plan to work - and save our PTO time.  But, very few will be working.  I still have two sets of minutes to get done so guess what I will be doing.  Maybe. 

And with that, I need to get off here and read a bit.  Merry Christmas to you and yours.  May your day be full of love, laughter, warmth, and special memories.

Blessings!

Christmas Eve thoughts

 Things are running through my mind this morning of things I need to get done - many things I've mentioned on here many times in the past few weeks.  Many.  Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. I need to figure out 1) do I want to go to the grocery at 7AM this morning to beat all the other crazies out there - or 2) put in an order (and forget some things) to pick up later in the day.  I'm really opting for the #2 and I did start an order to be picked up - but my list is in the other room, so I stopped. I want to focus on what I want for the dinners/lunches; and then I tell myself, no one is coming over until AFTER Christmas, so actually, I can go get it on Friday morning and get for the three days. So get today; or get Friday. It doesn't really matter. Except I am pretty sure I will need to get out of this house at some point today.  Oh wait - we do have church at 2PM for the Christmas Eve service.  That is the one we plan to go to.  I was able to visit Ms. Diane yesterday so hopefully can visit Ms. Vicky today after church. I really do need to.

I had a nice breakfast with Sue yesterday and we exchanged gifts.  She gave me a couple very nice glass dishes that a friend of hers made.  Beautiful designs on them.  And Chocolate, of course.  She also paid for the Christmas Ideas House, so that all is my Christmas gift.  And I love it.  I've already put candy in one dish and have it out on the table.

I did my errands yesterday, visited Ms. Diane, visited my daughter, and got a lot done. Today I'm trying to decide what is important enough for me to do today. I think I will put in for pickup my grocery list - and what I forget, I can get on Friday.  Sounds like a plan to me!  I am working on Friday (at this point) so pick up is the way to go.

I suppose I need to figure out what hubby and I are having on Christmas day for lunch.  It seems odd planning something special for two people.  So really, it won't be 'special', but I will cook something - but what?  I have salmon in the freezer, perhaps I will cook that.  Sounds like a plan, right?

I'm missing hearing from my son.... he hasn't written in his blog in over a week; hasn't responded to my text a week ago, and I know enough to not bug him. But if he reads this today, he will know that I'm thinking of him, praying for him, and I love him.  Sometimes that's all I can do.

Matthew 13:44-46 (ESV):  The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up.  Then in his joy goes and sells all he has and buys that field.  Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it.

Jim Elliot said, "He is no fool to give what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose.

If Christ is our treasure, no one can steal him, no one can damage him, no one can take our satisfaction away.

If Christ is our treasure, we have a completely different perspective to earthly things; we can enjoy them, and we can use them, but they never own us. If God gives us earthly riches, we are thankful. If not, we are content. These things simply are not important to us.

I learned growing up what it was to WANT things, and to NEED things, and what the difference was.  I did not have much.  In elementary school, I had only two dresses, and I'd wear one every day for 3-4 days, then switch to the other.  Back in my day, you didn't get ridiculed for wearing the same clothes, as many others had the same problems.  But I remember those days, and until I went to work at 15 1/2 years old, I only had what I 'needed'.  When I started working, Mother took my check each week to help with bills, but would sometimes buy me a suit to wear to school and church.  I never owned a pair of jeans until I left home and was married.  Imagine that.  I wore what we called 'pedal pushers' - which are nowadays called capris.    But I had all I needed.  I had clothes to wear, and we had food to eat.  

So here I am now, and I come across those verses today and I sit here and think about them.  What is it that I need today?  What is it that I want today?  Honestly, I feel I have all I need, and all I want.  Anything else is icing on the cake.  Yes, there are things I 'want' to do... but circumstances being what they are, I don't want to do them now.  I want to enjoy the things I want to do, if you know what I mean.  Maybe it is just my imagination about not enjoying - or enjoying - but it is my imagination. And the fear that my joy will be pushed out of me, prevents me from stepping out and doing things. And that's all on me.  

But what is it that is my joy?  If Jesus is my total joy, I need to look at things differently. And in some things, I feel I do.  I don't want things. I think of my little sister and her addiction to shopping.  She never ceases to amaze me that she will spends hours going through Amazon, although she has no money to spend, and will order numerous things, and after she gets them, she ships back to Amazon.  I'm really surprised that Amazon hasn't 'black-balled' her from ordering - she has done this for years.  One latest thing is she bought a Christmas tree cake mold.  She returned it with other things the other day.  Yesterday as we talked, she was laughing... she had thought she would make a Christmas tree cake and ice it and put colorful sprinkles on it for Christmas.... only to realize the cake mold was one that she had returned.  Now she has the 'things' needed for a cake, and no mold to use like she wanted.  Yes, I return things as well, but certainly not the volume she returns! LOL  One year she had so many, she was embarrassed, and she and her husband went to two-three locations to drop them off so that people didn't look at them funny.

It's Christmas Eve.  Tomorrow is Christmas Day.  And then - MY fun begins with my family the day after.  And that's ok. 

Which reminds me, I need to work on the message I'm supposed to do Sunday at the RV park!  I've got a rough draft completed, but still have about two - three hours to work on it.  Should get it started today on a final draft, I'm thinking.  I'll get it done, Lord willing.  It's all about Him anyway.  I'm using Isaiah 9:6 as the scripture and talk about the Peace of God. :-)  Lord knows that we all need His Peace.

And with that, I'm going to jump off here and go find my grocery list.  Get that order put in and select my time to pick up.  

Pause and think about the Peace that only God can give you.  What is it that keeps your heart in turmoil?  Give it to Jesus, and allow the Prince of Peace to provide what you need.  Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ.  He is the only One who can bring you what you need.

Blessings!

It's been a struggle in more ways than one...

How do I elaborate on that statement? I honestly don't know.  The bed still has 'stuff' on it, but it's mainly the Christmas stockings now for my children and their spouses, and hubby.  And I realize..... I bought wayyyyy too many snacks.  And since for some grandchildren I have no idea what to get them - for years it has been a flannel shirt and a hoodie and I want it to be different every year... they aren't getting both of those... so one or two may have 'snacks' as their 2nd gift.  I generally give 2 gifts to the grandchildren.  Except for my girls.  They tend to get a bit more, and I won't apologize for that... my girls and I are much closer.  We talk during the year, which doesn't usually happen with the boys.  I even got a text (a thank you) from a grandson up north who apologized he 1) didn't send me a list as I always ask for, and 2), he appreciated what clothes he did get from us.  Of course he gets salsa too, which I guess is a good thing.

Speaking of - although I was working yesterday, I managed to get a batch of cranberry pumpkin nut bread made and also about 4 batches of salsa.  After work I finished up the salsa, then headed to visit my daughter. From there it was back home to fix pizza for dinner for hubby and I.  He is getting in my way a lot lately; insisting on washing dishes while I'm cooking.  Sigh. I get it, I understand, but the kitchen is MY domain, the only room in the house that I can call 'mine' (other than my bathroom) - and now he wants to be 'in it'. Lord, help me be patient!   I actually got a few more gifts wrapped last night - mainly because I have to get the dining room table cleared off.  And I realized then that I missed some ... and had to improvise.  Oh if only I could have time with the grandchildren during the year - even if in December! - so that I could 'know' them and know their dreams, their wants, their needs.  I know the parents of the adult children feel the same way.  And, by the way, I realize shopping for us is difficult as well - and it shouldn't be.  There is nothing we need.  All appliances are currently working. Food is in the cupboards and in the refrigerator/freezer.  All I need is love. :-)

And then I tell myself once again, I am the grandparent.  I need to just stop and think things through and let one thing come to mind and let that be it.  I don't look at the cost (cause I do not spend that much on a gift), but I want them to know how loved they are, just as they are.  I miss the days of 'old' when I could gather the grandchildren about me to bake cookies (in a much larger kitchen) and laugh and just enjoy being together.  I so very much miss those days.  I hope those days of memories mean as much to them as they do to me.  I love each one so much - if they only knew....

I have today, tomorrow, and Thursday off work.  Still debating on working Friday.  Since I really won't be going anywhere and cooking dinner for my daughter and family coming that night to have Christmas together, it's ok to get away from the desk and just check back.  My male boss is off as of tomorrow through next Friday - YAY!  Sue is taking the same days as me.  Save a vacation day; work as needed, and get done the things I need to.

I am meeting Sue this morning for breakfast at our usual place.  Since we both took the day off, we don't have to rush through breakfast (not that we did) but can exchange gifts and chat all we want.  Yes, I still need to get ready.  I also need to put her bag together.  I got her a nice purse, and she will also get bread, chocolate protein bars, jam (my last jar of strawberry; guess I need to make more), scones, cookies, cheeseball.... and I can't remember what else.  I had to write it all down last night (oh yes, salsa too) so that I remember to grab everything today.  She plans to retire this year and that is going to be so hard on me.  We've been together over 30 years.

After we go our separate ways, I need to stop by a thrift store and pick up a bath chair and a walker for my daughter.  I can't believe her insurance company has denied both for her.  She called around and found a thrift store that had several so I will stop and pick up and drop off at her house so that she will have.  Some insurance companies!  I get the no wheelchair, although that would be handy here in the beginning for her to get around in, but seriously - not even a walker?  Do they want her to fall again?  She is definitely excited about getting to go home.  They have also said she could travel if takes frequent stops to get out and move.  She's excited about that as well.  She was so loopy a couple days in the hospital she doesn't even remember her son coming to town and staying overnight with her at the hospital.  Does not even remember him being here.  See why I was so scared at what was happening?

After picking those up and dropping them off, I need to pick up a few groceries (not for baking, but for eating) and then I have a chiropractor appointment in the middle of the afternoon.  It only takes 5 minutes and then I'm on my way.  We are meeting friends for dinner tonight at 5:30PM.  Always on the go in December, it seems.

So there you have it. My day is going to be somewhat busy.  Tomorrow I have nothing on the agenda except I still need to go see Ms. Diane, and Ms. Vicky.  I really need to.  Maybe I can make a batch of muffins and give a couple to each one.  I still need to make more bread as well.  Only my daughter and her family like it, but I know my daughter has three loaves in her freezer cause I'd give to her to take to the grandson - and she'd forget. Oh well.  I use the loaves as gifts, and there are a couple neighbors I really want to give a little something to - even if it is just a loaf of bread.

And I need to confirm with each of the children what they want for their meal when they come over. My daughter wants soup - so that's easy enough.  Love using my crockpots and let them cook throughout the day. I think my oldest son wants lunchmeat sandwiches, potato chips, and salad.  That's even easier. Just need to make sure I have condiments to go with them. Think I'll do a 7 layer salad this year.  I'm not sure on the youngest; we had talked soup  - but since it is Sunday after church they will be coming over, I won't be home in the morning to do much cooking.  I wonder if they would wait until about 2PM so that I can pull some soup together.  He usually wants garbage, but I guess some family members complained it's the 'same food every year'. LOL  But if it is what HE wants, he should get it, right?

And I need to get off here and get dressed and ready to leave.  Looking forward to not having to 'go' anywhere tomorrow unless I call in a grocery order.  In fact, I may skip going today and order it in the morning for pick up - and let Frys do my shopping.  I love doing that - saves me time and money - and yes, I generally forget what I need unless I write it down, but if I'm inside the store, I pick up things that I don't need at that moment.  I don't even know what hubby and I will have for Christmas day - as we will be alone.  I probably will fix ham and eggs for breakfast; but have no idea for the rest of the day. Will figure it out; we have plenty of food.

And with all that rambling, I'm getting off here and start getting ready.  Don't want to rush and forget anything. Love the times I can run away. Even if it is only for a few hours.  Enjoy your day - 

Blessings!

An interesting thought in the middle of the night

 and yet, I can realize how true that interesting thought was.  I'm going to share it, because it may affect you as well.  It took a few days of really feeling worn out; of a day of standing most of the day yesterday with baking cookies; of feeling stiffness getting down on the floor to play with great-granddaughter; of choosing to sit in a chair instead..... and then in the middle of the night..... it hit me.  Perhaps it will 'hit' you as well.

Yes, I work out.  Work out the entire body, in fact.  I'm pretty strong, even with working out only two 30 minute segments a week.  But that's it. And I realize now - that is not enough.  What a typical day for me looks like now is get up, come in here and sit for 2-3 hours reading my Bible, any other book, writing in a journal (on occasion), praying, and continuously sitting in a chair (or reclining) while I type in here.   Then I get up and get dressed (sometimes) and then come back in and sit at the work desk, and sitting at my desk at least 90% of my work day... sitting.....  Then twice a week, I would head to the gym at some point for a great workout.  And come home, (or stop to eat out), cook dinner, sit, and come sit on the couch and sit for the rest of the evening.  

You know where this is going, don't you?   The very things I have complained for years about hubby, I have been doing.  Sitting.  Granted, there is nothing wrong with sitting - IF you are also getting movement at other times. Yes, yesterday I baked some scones, made pumpkin raisin cookies.  My granddaughter and great-granddaughter came over to bake and I was on my feet most of the time for that.  My legs were sore last night- which is why I had this thought in the middle of the night.  My laziness - even with working out twice a week - is showing up big time. And now I need to make the decision to 'fight' it.

I don't want to hurt every time I want to get down on the floor.  I don't want to grunt every time I get up out of a chair (you know you do it too!!).  I may be 76 years old, but I do not want to act old. Does that make sense?  I loved my mother, but I do not want to become my mother, in which she just sat in a chair at the kitchen table, waiting for someone to come visit her.  She only went somewhere when someone took her, and it was always with great effort.

And now that I've finished the last package of donuts I had in the house as I write all this, I'm going to change. (Had to get rid of them; couldn't have them sitting around to tempt me, right?)  Instead of sitting at my desk working all day, I NEED to make myself get up and talk about the house or do a quick walk down to the end of the block and back.  Or even get on the trampoline or treadmill for even ten minutes, just to keep moving.  I cannot allow myself to become immovable because I'm too busy (or too lazy) to get up and take a break walk.  Does that make sense? 

I think it is because I 'saw' and 'felt' it in my body yesterday that in the middle of the night it came to me that I feel it more this year because I am not as active as I have been in previous years.  2026 is the year things will come to change.  I hope to start it now, but, knowing me, it will be a work in progress to work up to it.  I know I will need to explain to hubby and he will want to 'do whatever I do' with me... he just doesn't get it.  He should do it for himself, not do it to be with me. His clinging is getting worse and causes me to withdraw from activity because I can't do it on my own.  UGH. I have to get over myself and my desire to 'do it all by myself' and allow him to help me.

Yesterday, he comes into MY kitchen (to which I've asked him numerous times over the years the kitchen was off limits when I'm cooking) and he asks, "can I help you do dishes?"  I had already washed my dishes and put them away.    He did that twice!  I get his wanting to help (we had had an earlier 'discussion' with his comment "I'm part of this family too!!" over helping with dishes or cooking.  Sigh. I understand his feeling, I truly do.  But it's too late.  I want to do it by myself.

After baking, and my grand and great granddaughters left, my mixing bowl was left in the sink and I decided to do something for my daughter.  The thought had occurred to me the night before, that I need to massage and polish my daughter's toes/feet and fingers/hand.  So I grabbed my red and silver sparkle polish, castor oil to rub on her feet, lotion for her hands, and off I went.  She was surprised to see me as we hadn't talked during the day. But she was excited to have her feet massaged and toes polished, and her hands and fingernails as well.  I am definitely not a professional, and made a mess on her thumb, but still, she was happy to get the massage if not a little color.  When I got home, hubby informed me he had washed the dishes I had left in the sink, and those that I had already washed, he had dried and put away.  He got to do it anyway. :-)   And, yes, I thanked him for doing it.

I saw a person coming in to pick up the trash and was wearing Hoka shoes.  I asked him if he liked them (surprise! I don't have a pair, although my brother recommends them!) and along with saying 'yes' about the shoes, he began to tell me about the insert that he wears (power-something, I think) which I don't remember now, but he said he also has plantar fasciitis (as I have had) and it really helps his feet.  And then I noticed even more how much my feet hurt because they didn't have the support they need (I have a high arch) in my shoe. So, yes, I went to Amazon last night and ordered myself a pair (about $36-$40) of inserts to put in my tennis shoes to get the support on my feet - which will stop the pain in my legs. Maybe it's something you need to look into?  I've bought from a podiatrist when first diagnosed with plantar fasciitis but I think I've worn those out. I have also used Dr. Scholls - but I don't feel I got the results I was seeking.  So I'm willing to spend the $40 to see if these will work. Stay tuned. Or remind me a month from now if they are working as I wear my tennis shoes nearly 5-6 days a week now.

I am working today, but plan to take off early if work allows.  I need to make myself do some workout - upper body today - either at the gym or back in my 'exercise room'. I am pretty sure hubby will push on me to go to the gym with him. And I need to get over my 'fear' of going to exercise on my own. I like Morgan deciding what I'm going to do - and adjusting the seat and the weights for me.  But if it gets hubby there, perhaps I need to encourage that.

Matthew 11:28-30 (ESV):  Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gently and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

I know that the majority of my 'complaint' of tiredness and soreness is my lack of activity, but it also had to do with my eating habits.  Donuts for breakfast just don't cut it.  Chocolate to get me through the day, doesn't have what my body needs to retain strength and energy. Skipping meals doesn't even help. I need to start today, and not put off until the January 1 date.  I can say 'no'.  It's just harder to say 'no' to myself when it's screaming 'more! more!'.  You know what I'm talking about.  It's drawing the line and saying 'enough!".  I need to change my behavior, and my eating habits, to regain strength and energy. Not something I WANT to do, and yet, it is.  I NEED to do it as well, if I care anything about my body.  And if I'm eating better, and getting movement in my body, it enhances the clarity of my mind where I can think clearly and get things accomplished.  It's a win-win - right?  How bad do I want it?  How bad do you want it?

And with that, I guess I need to get off here.  I have some time left and I think I need to just be still and be quiet for a bit.  Maybe think about another dream I had which was a good one. And I'll leave that there. Sometimes it's nice to have a dream to hold in your heart. 

Blessings!

I guess you could say it was a 'play day' yesterday

 Hubby and I went to the gathering as we had planned yesterday and had a nice time.  We stayed about two hours and then it was time to leave.  Hubby and I then went to the rehab center to visit the daughter for a little while.  From there, I decided I needed a pedicure (and hubby loves them) (and I refuse to cut his toenails) so we went to get a pedi for both of us, and a mani for me. I don't know why hubby declined.  But my toes and nails are now painted a pretty red, for the Christmas holiday.  After that we both decided we were hungry, and instead of coming home and me fixing up something, we opted for Master Taco.  After all, the Rehab, Nail place, and Master Taco are all on/off the same road!  I brought the majority of mine home, as they give us a lot.  Hubby even put some of his in the box.  Once we got home, I was too tired to even think about baking, but did put together some breads (of the few I have left) for our pastor and his wife.  We will take it with us this morning.  If we would have opportunity to chat with them, they would get a lot more, but I just grabbed a few breads and protein bars plus a candle that will be their gift. 

A granddaughter and great-granddaughter are planning on coming over after church to bake cookies today.  My oven has been acting up this past week, but I hope it will work fine today.  If not, they can take the dough home and finish baking it.  Not going to pass up the opportunity to spend time with them.  Hubby will call the warranty company on Monday to have them come out to fix the oven - otherwise, everyone will be getting lunchmeat sandwiches for lunch!  What does it do?  I turn it on - and it comes on, then shuts down.  I turn it on again, and it stays on.  Weird.  Crossing fingers.  I still have a lot of baking to get done for my breakfast with my favorite boss on Tuesday!  

I still need to go visit Ms. Diane - I did talk with her the other day.  I still need to go see Ms. Vicky.  I don't need to take anything to Ms. Diane in the facility, but I should take something to Ms. Vicky.  It's just finding an hour in my day to see her - at least with taking Tuesday and Wednesday off work, surely I can find time on Wednesday to do both of these things.  I WANT to, it's just I have so much to do and finding the time. But I NEED to, as well.  Nothing is more important than family and friends.

My house is a mess; I have not finished wrapping yet - it's all on the dining room table; this bed is still covered with 'stuff', and I have boxes on this side of the bed.  Will I ever get it cleaned up?  What is wrong with me that I'm not getting this all done?  I just quit come evening and sit down - that is probably my downfall.  I need to just keep moving and get it done.  Maybe tonight, except once my granddaughter and family leave, I want to go see my daughter, but I may have to put it off.  I have so much to do.  

Isaiah 26:8 (ESV):  In the path of your judgements, O Lord, we wait for you; your name and remembrance are the desire of our soul.

O Lord, we seek after You, we wait for You to guide and direct our path.  We love Your name, and You alone are the desire of our soul.

Have you ever thought about that?  Is Jesus the desire of your soul?  What is your desire?  There are so many things  - and I'm guilty as well - that we put before Him.  Even in this season of celebrating the birth of Christ, we tend to overlook the reason and dwell upon the gift-giving.  You know from all my posts that I'm guilty of that. I over did this year - again - and well, at least I've quit buying.  I'm just trying to wrap.  I need to pull the gifts out from under the tree, and if there is anyone I feel I haven't gotten enough for, I will put cash in an envelope for them. Not going to worry about gift cards. It's not that I don't think about them and want to choose something, I'm not involved in their lives enough to know what a need is. Or even a want. But, I'm hoping that I have things pretty well evened out - except for my children; they (hopefully) get the most.  But you know what?   Think about this:

The wise men did not bring Jesus numerous gifts.  So why do I get so carried away buying things they probably don't want, don't need, and never thought about?  The wisemen each gave one gift (that is mentioned, anyway) - gold, frankincense, and myrrh.  I know I over do it; I always want them to have things I didn't have growing up.  I want them to know that they are loved and special to me. And giving is my love gift.  Some day they will look back on all this 'stuff' they have been given, and shake their heads once again..... but I think they will also understand my heart.  At least I hope they know how much I love them.  Yes, they are all from hubby and I, but in many cases, when they open them, that is the first time hubby sees the gift. LOL  Just like in most marriages.  

And with that, I need to get off here - church this morning and I need to work on my 'beauty'.  Have an amazing day!

Blessings!

I'm missing.....

 my boy's 'chats'.... he hasn't written in his blog since last Sunday.... I sent him a text on Thursday and he didn't respond.... maybe when he reads this, he will send me a text and let me know how he is doing.  I saw some photos my DIL posted about her work's Christmas party, and I saw Mrs. Claus and the Grinch, but did not see Santa, and that made me sad.  Where is Santa....and where is my son?

So glad today is Saturday.  This week has been another busy one, even with Thursday being a sorta 'play' day with a run down to Mesa for the 'holiday party' with other employees.  Today, I think, is the last of the gatherings we have; hubby's Wednesday bible study is having a get-together today at 1PM, I think it is, and they made it today so that I could attend as well.  It hits against a great-granddaughter's dance program, but this was planned and I agreed to go (after all, they made it Saturday so I could attend) before I knew about the dance program.  I still need to make a cheeseball this morning to take as that is my contribution toward the 'snacks'.  I need to find a gift for the host/hostess as well.

This afternoon I hope to bake some as I will meet my favorite boss on Tuesday and exchange gifts.  95% of her gift is always baked goods and salsa, cheeseball, etc.  Her kids grew up on having my goodies for their Christmas gathering, and I will not disappoint them! You know how I love to bake and give away.  We have neighbors as well I want to give something to.  Need to work on pulling that together.  We have new neighbors too on the catty-corner lot.  Haven't met them yet; might be a good opportunity, you think? "Welcome and Merry Christmas"?  It's hard for me to go meet new people anymore... I always feel like retreating into a corner.  But once I do step out, I am glad I did.  This will probably be no exception.  It's just doing it.

I am working Monday (but may shut down early if I can) and then I'm off work Tuesday (meeting my boss), Wednesday (finishing up everything for Christmas-joining the mad rush to figure out what food to have on hand), and of course Thursday, which is Christmas.  Ironically, with my daughter in the rehab center until Christmas Day, our Christmas is once again all over the place.  Last year we did something different and I'm glad we did - and I feel it worked out well for everyone.  We have now implemented it for each year.  Only it kind of got thrown out of whack with the daughter's injury.  They were coming Christmas Eve - and now we don't know when we will get together.  She needs to not push it when she comes home.

Last year the daughter and family came over the Saturday before Christmas; the oldest son and his family the Saturday after Christmas, and the youngest son on Monday after Christmas.  It was really weird for hubby and I were alone the week of Christmas.  Of course we do our gifts on Christmas morning, regardless.

This year we are uncertain on when for the daughter and her family; the oldest will come over Saturday after Christmas, and the youngest will bring his brood over the Sunday after church after Christmas.  We may see about the daughter coming over that Sunday evening as I have to work on Monday.  Still need to confirm meal plans, but since it's after Christmas, I don't have to get out in the mad rush right now. Speaking of, I did head over to Sam's Club yesterday; needed trash bags and thought I'd pick up a few things.  It was only 11:30AM on a Friday - and the place was a madhouse!  People EVERYWHERE!  I got what I needed and I got out of there pronto!  For me to be in and out of Sam's Club in about 40 minutes is unheard of - and I went down nearly every aisle!  But I got everything I had on my list (that I left in the car) and that was a good thing.  If I need anything now, I'll go to Frys or Safeway.  

Today, after the party, I want to finish up wrapping and maybe get this bed cleared off.  It's just bags and stuff now.  Need to start filling up the stockings to make sure I have all I want to put in them. More than enough, I'm sure.  Yes, son, I remember - no donuts for you!  I'm still concerned I may not have much for a couple grandsons, but plan to pull all the gifts out from under the tree(s) and do some counting and try to figure it out.  I'm in a lot of 'trouble' with myself because I didn't track things better.  What I need to do, I think, is wait until I purchase everything, and THEN decide to wrap and record.  Instead I try to stay up on the wrapping and forget to write things down when I'm 'on a roll' and forget what I have purchased.  My oldest granddaughter has been difficult this year for some reason - I don't want to give just to give something, I want it to be something she would want or need, or could use.  SO I asked her, and she gave me some ideas for the entire family.  That helped, although I still feel I didn't get her much.  

This year has really flown by - we've been saying that all year long.  And here is the end of it.  I feel like I have not accomplished much.  I did work out and get a lot stronger than I was at the beginning of the year.  Speaking of getting stronger, Morgan is to be induced this morning to have her little girl - which means 6 weeks of maternity leave - and hubby and I have to do our own training to keep the progress we've made.  We don't get six weeks maternity leave excuses.... we have to keep building the muscle.  I'm not sure about using equipment at the gym... I'm always so self-conscious - and I shouldn't be.  But I can do my core exercises here at home as Morgan doesn't use equipment for that - and I can remember it.  And since I had core Thursday morning, my core is reminding me of some of the exercises.

Luke 2:1 (NKJV):  And it came to pass in those days that a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be registered.

Can you even imagine what chaos there would be on the highways and everywhere if we were told that we had to go get registered in the city in which we were born?  I think we can pretty much assume that the world as it was then, was not as populated as it is now.  It is about 80 miles (yes, I looked it up) from Nazareth to Bethlehem and would have taken Joseph and Mary anywhere from 5 days to 10 days for them to travel it by foot, especially if Mary was starting to feel the approaching birth of her baby.  I imagine that trip helped 'move' baby Jesus along!  I cannot even imagine walking that far - let alone being heavily pregnant and walking it! Or even riding the donkey!  Pause a moment and think about that!  Technically, we ARE registered when we are born and receive a birth certificate, if you think about it.  

I often wondered where my mama got the phrase 'This, too, shall pass' - and I think it is derived from the beginning of this scripture.  And it came to pass..... which often assures me that things will come, and things will pass.  That beginning of the sentence is in a few other places in the Bible, and I always think of my mama when I read it.  And I am reminded that when I'm struggling and in a not so good place, I can tell myself 'and this too shall pass' because I know it will.  Perhaps not in the timeframe I choose, but always in God's timeframe.  His timing is so much more important.

I think of my daughter's fall and all the things that have been put on hold because of it, all the things that have been postponed, all the things that will change over the next few months as she recovers.  Her move to New Mexico has been delayed a little.  Her Christmas shopping about came to a halt (except for Amazon, of course).  She is behind on her wrapping.  She didn't get packages shipped out. She didn't get to go have Christmas with her son and his family as planned for last week.  Everything was put on hold.  But you know what?  I truly believe tis is God's way of telling her she needs to slow down and let Him lead her.  We are told in the Bible not to make plans for tomorrow, for we do not know if tomorrow will even come for us.  We make all these plans for the future, and yet, we don't know if they will even happen.  I'm not saying we shouldn't make plans (you know I have to!), but perhaps we need to pause and have a back-up 'just in case'.  Maybe now is not the time for her to move away.  Or maybe I'm just coming up with excuses and letting God take the blame for 'letting' it happen because I don't want her to move.  

But I also remind myself that I moved away from my mama when I married my children's dad.  I moved even further away when I married hubby.  But in my case, moving away made me grow up and become independent on others, and more dependent upon God.  Especially the move way out here away from family.  It was extremely hard on my children and on myself.  I missed my family so much, and as we didn't have the money to drive or fly back, it made it even more hard.  It broke me in many places and I had to grow strong.  Life was truly hard; no one knows how hard it really was.  Not only for me, but for my children.  I tried to send the kids back for a couple months for a couple years, but I didn't give thought to my siblings working and not home to take care of the kids.  After all, they took days off when we were there for vacation.  I just didn't think about it.  Until one year a comment was made that I sent them back so that I'd have a babysitter - which was not true.  But that comment hurt, and all I had wanted was for the children to know their cousins, aunts/uncles and grandparents.  After that comment, we never sent them back.

And my mind is wandering this morning so I'm going to get off here and take my remaining time to read some.  Did not make my goal in reading this year.  My goal will remain the same for next year - and perhaps things will calm down to where I can meet my goal.  I need to try to complete it in 10 months as the last two are always so busy.  And with that, I hope you have a wonderful day!

Blessings!

So glad it's Friday!

 I was worn out from the day yesterday and went to bed at 8PM.  I was awake off and on during the night; and have slept in here off and on since I came in here at 4AM.  And I could still go back to sleep - but time is now getting away from me.  Hubby has left for his bible study and I will get this done and get on the work computer.  I have a dentist appointment at 9AM so other than work, that's all I have to get done today.  Well, there IS wrapping still.  After work I visited my daughter in the rehab center, and when I came home, I fixed hubby a grilled ham and cheese sandwich and called it dinner.  Sat on the couch for a little bit until I decided I just needed to go to bed.  Quit looking at the time; my body was telling me it needed rest.  So I did.

My core training went well yesterday and now our trainer is off for six weeks.  She is to be induced in the morning, if she doesn't go into labor today.  Now for six weeks, hubby and I will have to go to the gym and work out on our own.  At least I can do my core work here at home.  I'm still self-conscious at the gym, although no one really pays any attention to me.  I will definitely miss Morgan.  But this will also give me a chance to prove to myself I can do it on my own.  I have some weights here at home, a treadmill, a trampoline, a ball, a weighted ball.... yeah, I need to put them to use.

Tis the weekend before Christmas, can you believe it?  This bed never did get cleaned off and my Christmas bedspread put on.  At this point, why bother.  I just want to get it cleaned off.

Oh I have something funny to share.  The white elephant gift exchange at work - Sue and I decided to participate, although in the past I have not.  Well, I took a gift last year to participate - but some guy grabbed my gift before I did. I figured he wanted to play and didn't bring anything. No biggie.  Anyway, what Sue and I heard when the announcement to play the white elephant game was "grab a gift and come get in the circle".  I grabbed what I took; Sue grabbed someone else's gift.  No biggie, right?  After we were seated, one of the leaders came over and told Sue she had not picked up her gift; she had someone else's gift, and that it was ok.  Weird conversation, and Sue and I both could not figure out what the big deal was.  Here is where it gets funny.  We start playing the 'Right Family' game - you know where every time the word RIGHT is used, the gift is moved right, where LEFT is used, it is moved to the left.  Well, we got through the story - and whatever gift you have, is the gift you get.   I 'received' a two-piece plastic container for snacks (or something like that; I haven't really looked at it yet.  Sue received her own gift!!  The very gift that she didn't start with, but brought for the white elephant exchange, she got as her gift!  She told me, of course, because we brought the same thing.  She just opened it up and acted like it was something new - and of course people were wanting to see what she ended up with because she is very respected and popular.  She and I both got a good laugh about it.

I did get to see my close friends; one got her gingersnaps and was very happy.  The other and I exchanged our gifts; she gave me a nice candle and some homemade biscotti and a beautiful card with a very special note in it.  My other boss, Brett, was there as well along with a few other co-workers.  It was fun to see everyone in person.  Many I had not seen for at least 5 years came this year.  My two friends and I got our photo taken together.  I never like my photos, but I'm glad I have some of my friends with me.  It does make me realize I am twenty years old or more than they are, when I look at my wrinkles!  Got to get rid of this muffin top though!  

My table and chairs for the great grandchildren arrived the other day.  Hubby asked me what it was; I just said "Christmas"!  My thought is that all of us can't always fit around our 8 person table since we have additions to families.  So, I bought a child size table and chairs that maybe I can sit with the great-grands and enjoy being with them.  Of course only one or two are old enough to sit there by themselves, but still, next year they may be able to.  Planning ahead, right?  I had a car seat delivered yesterday - I remember when I drove the grandchildren to church on Wednesday nights in my suburban....and I had a car seat for the littlest one.  David was the last one to use it.  That was many years ago.  I may never use this one, but if by some chance I have a great-grandchild (or another small child) that I need to take somewhere, I'm prepared, right?  Wishful on my part, perhaps.  I have always said my grandchildren kept me young.  I'm hoping the great-grandchildren do the same.  I don't mind getting older in age.... I want to be young in body to where I can get down (and back up!) to play with them on the floor.  And that, my friend, is the reason I torture my body in these workouts.  Not to look good (although that is a great side-effect), but to be able to play with my great-grandchildren.  I don't know how many years I have left, but I want them to remember my getting down to their level and playing with them.

Which reminds me, we need to look at getting a new table and chair set for the adults.  Obviously, although it was expensive, this table was cheaply made.  It's perhaps about ten years old now and the table is wobbly some, the chair seats are coming off, chairs are losing screws.  And people rarely sit in them.  I need more like the chair we keep for special people. Strong, sturdy, and heavy. 

And - since I've been rambling so much this morning, I need to get off here and get dressed for the dentist (and for work).  I'm hoping it will be a light work day so that I can get a few things done.  I think I'm 'done' with baking, except I need to fix things for my boss as we are meeting on Tuesday to exchange gifts, and then figure out something for my neighbors.  I work Monday, but I am off Tuesday (meeting Sue), Wednesday, (finishing up things), Thursday, Christmas day, and Friday I'm working.  A two-day work week.   Daughter and family and us need to figure out when we can do Christmas together since she won't be discharged until Christmas Day.  We both figure she needs to do nothing when she gets discharged; work on getting home and moving around.  They were coming Christmas Eve.  Will figure it out eventually.  Maybe Sunday evening, depending on how she is doing.  

And with that - I'm off here.  Hope that you have an amazing, safe, happy, day.

Blessings!

Another busy - very busy - day

 I am exhausted.  Or, rather, I was last night. I'm still tired this morning, but at least I got some sleep. I think I am doing too much in too little time. Does that make sense? Probably not. I have been confirming to myself for several days now, I will not allow myself to get caught up in this madness next year.  I'm digging through it still this year.  Yesterday was a 'day' at work... three town hall meetings - and once you hear it, you have heard it, right?  But I had to be on for all three sessions.  By the third one I had quit listening.  I worked as meetings came in along the way.  I couldn't leave my desk, really, because if the EA who was doing the slide presentation had computer problems (which she did before the day started - her computer wouldn't even come up!), I had to be ready to jump and bring up the slides so that the meeting could continue.  By the time the last session ended at 3:30PM, I was tired.  I shut down my computer 5 minutes early because I just didn't want to sit there for five minutes.  And yes, I see I have a couple meetings that came through right at 5PM.  Sigh.

I still have so much to get done for the holidays!  Today is the company 'holiday' party and I'm heading to to the east side about 9:30-ish, I think.  I had said I'd bring a cheeseball for an appetizer - and after visiting my daughter at the rehab after work (SHE GETS DISCHARGED CHRISTMAS DAY!), I came home and cooked dinner - something I haven't done in the past 3 weeks or so.  Nothing fancy, but it made hubby happy he had a meal. Sigh.   After that I got started on gingersnap cookies for my friend Paula; it's her Christmas gift every year because they are her favorites.  I got a gift put together for my friend Cecilia.  Grabbed some of my bread out of the freezer to put in small bags for a few others that may come to the 'party'. I got the cheeseball made.  I had to finish the advent puzzle I was working on so that I could tear it apart and put it away; I needed the space on the table to wrap gifts. Yes, I need to finish up gifts for my youngest to take up north for the grandson. Guess what didn't get wrapped last night.  By 10PM I didn't feel I had much strength left, which is odd, so I didn't finish that (will do that when I get home after the 'holiday' party).  I did get the 'white elephant' gift wrapped that I am to take for the party. And I went to bed. So. very. tired.

I have training at 7AM this morning so my morning is kind of messed up.  I have to stop at 6AM so that I can get dressed and ready to head out the door at 6:30AM.  So I change up my reading.  And I was so sleepy this morning. I woke at my usual time and came in here hoping to sleep a bit, but could not. I've done some reading, but knowing I need to stop early has me keeping an eye on the clock.  In fact, I want to stop early on everything and jump on the work computer to get an out of office put on it, and also finish up the meeting I was working on when I shut it down last night.  Work never ends, right?

So what's on tap for today?  Training, then get ready for the holiday party at the office (an hour's drive thereabouts), and go there. Probably back home around 2-ish. Finish wrapping for the grandson and his mother and son and then the youngest will be over to pick them up. He will take them up north tomorrow. Oh, and I need to finish working when I get back as well.  I THINK we are home tonight... not sure; at this moment, afraid to look. LOL Need to get ahold of a friend and see if they want to do dinner - I had said we'd see them before Christmas. It's either tonight or Monday night. 

So there you have it. Is it my age that is wearing me down?  Could be, but I think it is more that my eating habits for the past month have gone way downhill.  I've been eating way too much candy, way too much chocolate (it's in a class by itself) and way too many sandwiches and french fries, as well as skipping meals and just not eating right.  I've got to stop some things and increase others.  Not complaining.... I do it to myself.  I need to stop. I need to clear my head by eating right, and regain some type of sanity. Not sure what type, but something other than what has been going on.  Right?

Matthew 6:34 (NKJV):  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Isn't that the truth!  Why worry about what I need to get done tomorrow - it may never come!  So many times I have stressed about getting things done - only to find when the next day arrives, it isn't that important.  I like those days.  In fact, if I was so worried about the meeting I know that is waiting for me to get it done, I would have got on the computer last night to complete it. I did not. But I have about 10 minutes in which I can jump online long enough to get it done. After all, I won't be getting much work done today!

And with that - I am going to jump off here and get that meeting done and off my plate!  Need to get dressed and ready for training.  Come home, get dressed again, and head east. 

One task, one day, at a time. B-r-e-a-t-h-e.  But then, I do enjoy getting away with friends. :-) And I get to see my favorite boss as well as my friends.  They all live on the east side so I don't get to see them often. But today is the today!

Blessings!

I ate the donuts

 I couldn't let smashed donuts go into a stocking, could I?  And definitely not in to the snack basket that I have out for our delivery people!  Somehow a (3-pc) small package of powdered donuts fell onto the bed, and somehow packages fell on top of them and smashed them.  I found them last night.  No, one can not throw away donuts just because they are smashed.  I had them for 'breakfast' this morning.  And they were good. Now I need protein to offset that sugar!  Right?

I received a surprise yesterday - got a couple small packages from Amazon - AND a fairly good size package from UPS.  That one I didn't know about - my big brother has sent a gift.  I had to laugh when I read his note.  He addresses the package to BOTH of us, but his note said that actually ALL the gifts are for me, and that hubby needs to find a hobby.  I had to chuckle at that comment.  I think many of us have told him that many times over the years.  TV and his phone are his hobbies, I think.  Sigh.  Anyway, that just means I have 4 gifts that are MINE. I'm curious what they are, for one feels like a baking pan of some sort; I really do not know what it is.  AND, I cannot open my gifts until Christmas, according to my brother.  And I respect his request.  Every.single.year.  Yes, I could open his gifts and he would never know unless I told him, but I don't.  I tease him nearly every day before Christmas that I'm going to open them, but I don't.  Sometimes he will let me open them on Christmas Eve.  But I respect his request. Whether I want to or not.  He always sends me nice things.

Yesterday - or was it the day before - my days are running together - I realized I still needed to send to our granddaughter in Nebraska and her family.  I have puzzles I had ordered to send to them, but needed to send something else - and have no idea. So I went to my favorite 'retailer' - Amazon - and decided to send them 'goodies'.  I'll send the puzzles after Christmas sometime.   Then I remembered I needed to send to my little brother yet - so found something to send him.  Then I remembered my oldest brother's daughter. I don't think I have talked to her since January (shame on me).  She had quit her job at Fed Ex, took out her 401K and was catching up on her bills.  Then she was going to look for another job.  I wonder how that panned out.  But I am trying to stay in contact - even if only Christmas - with my oldest brother's only child.  In writing all this, I think I shared all about the gift buying via Amazon yesterday. Oh well.  

I got nothing done yesterday that I needed to get done.  Work was busy. Didn't take time to wrap.  I finished up one of the advent puzzles and then tore it apart so that I could have that end of the table.  I need the other end too, but still have an advent puzzle I'm working on there.  I worked on it last night to try and finish it - but this one is harder than the other.  Much harder.  I still have 3 days to go on it before I'm finished, then I will tear it apart and put it away so that I can have the rest of the table for the gift-wrapping.  You know, I have decided not to stress about the gift wrapping.  My children and their families come at 3 different times.  I only need to get done the group that is coming.  Right?  So the majority, if not all, of the gifts are on one side of the table. The bed is still not cleaned off, but maybe I can get it done today.  I have a box of stocking stuffers - and I have no idea why I bought so much junk food to put in the stockings. I guess because it can be stretched further than a pair of socks can, right? I need to think this through next year.

I also did not bake last night.  And I have so much to get done today because tomorrow is when I head down to the office for the company gathering.  I will meet at least 3 of my friends there with my boss. Gingersnaps will be made some time today for one. I like to give 'fresh' items so have stalled.  One I don't need to give 'food' to; She says I am her mentor because we chat about God and I send her books and she often seeks 'advice'.  I have a book that I think she will get a lot out of - Spiritual Disciplines, if you will.  An old book, but a great one.  I bought it, intending to read it again myself, and have not taken the time.  I can always find my old copy somewhere on the shelf.  Sigh.  Will try again after the holidays to get hubby to help me put in author order.  Or find a way to do it myself without his knowledge.  I know we have several books that we have 2-3 copies of.  

I did go see my daughter for a short while last night.  Hubby went with me so we can't 'really' talk, if you know what I mean.  She put a movie on (Home Alone) and we just sat there for a bit, then I told her we would go home.  We weren't conversing, and when we did, hubby always interrupted with comments of his own (which isn't a bad thing, just unneeded), so we came home.  I brought out the gifts to the dining room table and then sat down to finish the puzzle; which as mentioned above, did not get done. So no wrapping. No cooking. No baking.  And today I need to get at least the baking done.

I start tomorrow off with a 7AM core training.  Fun.  My legs are barely letting me walk today.  I don't know what we did differently that made my legs so sore, but it worked, whatever it was.  I think it was the leg press - or maybe the leg extensions for one minute. I don't know, it could be the squats holding a 35 pound kettle bell, or even the lunches holding 12.5 weights in each hand.  Whatever it was - it worked to hurt my leg (and butt) muscles!  Once back tomorrow, it will be getting ready to head down to the office.  Another day 'off' that I get to socialize.  And I'm going to put in a request for mileage for two trips (one last week for the male boss' department gathering, and tomorrow) - normally I don't, but other departments put in for mileage - and at 70 cents per mile - I can get back about $61.60 to cover my gas.  I use up about a quarter tank of gas there and back.  My boss will approve it too. I think I did it last year as well.  I don't put in for the time I meet with her, that's on me.  And I don't HAVE to attend these social events, but I NEED to.  Justification to be paid for mileage, right?

In my devotional today I read about when Jesus met up with the rich young ruler and the ruler asked Jesus what did he lack to have eternal life.  And after Jesus responded to him, "Go and sell what you have, and give to the poor, and then come, follow me." (my paraphrase)  And the rich young ruler turned and went away sad.  Why?  Because in that one sentence, Jesus showed the rich young ruler what he treasured more than Jesus.  His wealth. His prestige.  He didn't want to let that go. He didn't want to be 'poor'.  So the rich young ruler turned away from Jesus and walked away. 

Pause.  How many of us do that very thing - when Jesus reveals to us what is most - or more - important than He is - we choose that 'thing'.  That 'person'.  What are we putting before Jesus that will keep us from having eternal life?  In a book I read it listed several things.  Pornography. Secret Sins. Gluttony. Gossip. Lying. Stealing. Anger. Bitterness. Self.  Unforgiveness.  And there are many more that I could list.  Sometimes when I read articles about living the Christian life, I am chastened.  I probably shouldn't say 'sometimes' - and instead put MANY times.  Not that I do all those things, but I do recognize my own faults (and then some).  But I want to follow Jesus and have eternal life with Him. So what am I willing to give up - to be with Jesus?  That's between He and I, and what He tells me to give up, but I will tell you, that when He does, that it is sometimes a real struggle.

And with that - I need to jump off here and jump in the shower.  Got a busy day ahead of me and need to clear my head to focus.  I put off some things yesterday so now have them staring me in the face this morning.  I'm actually thinking what would I have to 'give up' in order to retire. I have a lot I want to get done and would have the time to do it. I'm willing to give up shopping.  (Seriously!!)  I'd rather make something for someone and let them 'put it away' if they don't want it. LOL  But for now, it isn't in my future; not the near future anyway. And sometimes that makes me sad.  If I was in the office, I know I would be thinking differently.  It's just being home 24x7 with hubby that drives me insane at times and why do I want to retire?  OH my crazy mixed-up mind! At least as long as I'm working, I can give to others whatever I want to give them.  And with that - I'm off here!

Blessings!