Yes, I told on him....

 but I don't know if it 'did any good'.....  I won any bet out there.... hubby used his walker (using it exactly the way he was told NOT to use it - and yes, I corrected him) from the car to Dr. Mark's office yesterday (and back to the car.  And it stayed in the back of my car this time.  As we came in, he is telling Lily (the assistant) that "see, I got it!" and I went on to say "and after getting it two days after Dr. Mark told him to, this is the FIRST time he has used it!"  So then, how did he respond to that?  "It fits perfectly in the trunk and I didn't want to disturb it" or something like that.  Sometimes......

I love Saturday mornings when nothing is going on.  At least I didn't have anything on my calendar.  Went to bed about 9:30-ish, I'd guess (after a movie, of course), and I am very surprised that I did not come fully awake until nearly 5:30am!  AND, I didn't get up during the night.  Looking at my watch report, I was a wake several times, and I remember vaguely waking up - but I still say it records 'awake' those times that I move my arm and 'wake up' my watch.  I don't believe any of these reports.  On the other hand, hubby lives by them and allows them to tell him if he slept good or not.  RME

I've had my cup of coffee this morning and just got me a cup of oolong tea with cats claw honey in it.  I'll let you look that one up if you are interested.  I try to drink a couple cups a day of tea anymore.  It kind of keeps me calm.  Wish it made me wise. LOL

I got a 'fun' package from my big brother yesterday - the doorbell rang, and I waited for hubby to go answer it.  He was in the kitchen, I was here in the bedroom as usual, working.  I didn't hear footsteps, so I got up to go see if someone was there.  He didn't hear the doorbell - and he had his hearing aids in.  Trust me, if he had heard it, he would be the one opening the door!  Anyway, there is this box and the label says, "Nxxx the birthday girl". LOL  I looked to see who it is from and it is my big brother and his wife.  How thoughtful!  I let him know I got it and asked if I could go ahead and open - there are 4-5 gifts wrapped inside.  He told me no.  He actually told me no!  I have to wait until tomorrow!  He does that to me at Christmas too - and yes, I honor his request for me to wait.  I tease him that I'm going to open the gifts, of course, and he would never know when I opened them, but he asked me to wait until my birthday, and I will.  I know what one is (it isn't wrapped) but will leave it with the others until tomorrow morning. I told him that before it is daylight I will have that paper ripped off!  LOL  I think my little sister's package is to arrive today - and when it does, I can open that one!  We never wait!

I do want to go out early this morning (and it's already 7:30) and transplant my spider plant - it is too crowded in the pot it is in and is dying.  I'll move it to a bigger pot.  I also want to scrub down the metal bench I have as it is covered in dust.  Try to clean up that porch area a bit.  Maybe. It is getting hot way too fast - already 94 degrees and when I come out of here in another hour...........or so....... it's going to be hot!  But I do want to clean the bench and transplant the plant before it totally dies.  We must be having a little wind.... I hear the neighbor's wind chimes dinging.....

I don't think much is planned for today.  Tomorrow is church, of course, and then we will head over to a granddaughter's for brunch/linner.... and visit a bit.  Haven't seen them for awhile, so am looking forward to visiting.  Will see how long we last before hubby needs to come home and nap. :)  Other than that, it will be another day.  Then back to work on Monday and Tuesday - and then vacation starts!  I'm still debating on taking the following Monday off.  I have timecards, but I can jump online and do those and still have the rest of the day ..... or I may just plan in a couple weeks taking a Friday off... Oh I don't know.... I think my biggest problem lately has been burnout.... and I need to take time for ME.  More on that another time.

Awww.... my oldest son just called and may be able to stop by later this afternoon.  I have some things for him that I've been holding on to.... just because.  But, he says he has a birthday gift for me - and that always causes me to smile.  Well, just getting to see him makes me smile. :-) (ok, as it does when I get to see my other two!!)

Psalm 149:4 (NKJV):  For the Lord takes pleasure in His people; He will beautify the humble with salvation.

I had to take some time to ponder that verse this morning.  The Lord does take pleasure in His people, and for that we can be grateful.  But He notices the humble ones before Him.  He gives us His salvation; to those who humble ourselves before Him.  I desire His pleasure for me.

We are often told in the Bible not to be proud.  "It's a sin to be proud", right?  Maybe I need to look up that scripture instead of second-guessing it.  

James 4:6 (NKJV):  But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: "God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble."

Ahhh - there is that 'P' word again, isn't it!  Proud.  There are so many ways it can be used, can be identified, right?  Being proud, and flaunting pride, are two different things, right?  It's one thing to be proud of someone, or something - and flaunting that pride all over the place. Does that make sense?  Some people just want it known who they are and what they do.... and in reality, does it really matter?  We are who we are.  I would rather be humble and let others find good in me, than for me to flaunt who I think I am (or am not) only to be brought down.  I will be humble to receive God's grace at all times.  

Perhaps we all need to pause and do an evaluation of 'who are we' and 'how do I project myself to others?'  People who promote themselves and talk about themselves all the time are usually scoffed at. Most everyone sees through the puffed up personality they want to portray.  None of us are better than any other.  We all dress the same way (well, normal people do).  We all drink water pretty much the same way.  We are only different in the eyes of God, to Whom we belong.  Glory to Him alone.

And with that... I'm going to get off here and go back to my reading.  I love these quiet mornings; may even have time for  another cup of tea.  Will see.  

Thought for today:  When God says no, it's not rejection.  It's protection from what we cannot see.

Have an amazing, delightful, relaxing, fulfilling day!

Blessings!

I survived...

 the 6AM board meeting yesterday without dropping the presentation and having to hunt for it again.  Whew!  Thank You, Jesus!  Yes, I really did pray about it before (and during!) the meeting!  He likes us to ask for the 'little things' as well as the 'big things'.  He is a good, good Father.

In fact, that song has been going through my mind this morning, the one by Chris Tomlin (I think) about a Good, Good, Father.  I really like the one by Crowder that is a bit more peppy and I had that one going through my mind as well.  "Tell me, is He good? (He's good!) Tell me, is He God? (He's God!) He is, Good God Almighty!"  Love it!

Uh oh - my day isn't starting well - I chipped a nail!  Gasp!  I will overcome!

Been busy somewhat already this morning.  Waited until hubby left then put a load of my clothes in the washer.  He hates it when I wash my own clothes!  He says that 'his job' - well, he doesn't do it often enough for me, and although he will 'plan' on doing the laundry probably tomorrow (Saturday), it takes him all day to do just two loads.  So I can do two loads (dark/light) and have dried, folded, and put away in the three hours he is gone on Friday mornings.  Which is why I always hold my breath when he starts talking laundry cause I'm pretty sure I can do my own.  I never have that much; I never go anywhere.  I've even washed my hair and took a shower already this morning!  Granted, I did skip some things this morning in order to do this, but ... I got these done that needed to be.

YAY - first load already in the dryer, second (and last) load in - and it's only 7:05a.  And I fixed myself a bowl of cereal while I was in that area.  You needed to know that - right?  I'm hungry!  LOL  I'm busy today - got to take hubby to go see Dr. Mark - and yes, he said he was going to use the walker to go into his office.  And I'm going to tell on him for NOT using it any other time!

Yesterday I had to take off work early to take hubby over to the dentist office. Actually, I didn't HAVE to take him to the DENTIST, but I wasn't sure how he'd be after sitting in the chair for three hours getting temporary crowns on his two front teeth that had cracked (I told him I think he cracked them one of the times he has fallen).   I was told to call the lab in Tempe on Monday to schedule going down for him to get the shade right, then we go back a second time  to confirm the shade, then the Dentist will put them on for him.  Might go down Wednesday morning since I am already off work, and we won't be leaving until about 1-ish to head to Overgaard.  (I dropped him off at 3p and he wasn't ready until 6p!)

We headed to Master Taco after the dentist office for I was really hungry - and I cleaned up my plate!  It really tasted good last night!  A granddaughter invited us over for a late lunch/early dinner on Sunday for my birthday.  Yes, I will be getting a year older.  Proud of it.  Think about what the alternative is.  Stay at the same age forever or gain another year?!  I can't snack or eat while wearing the invisalign liners and they are difficult to get out (or I just haven't gained that expertise) so I don't snack.  The only thing I can have with them in is water.  So after I eat my cereal, drink my tea (already had a cup of coffee), I will be brushing my teeth and snapping them back in.  Maybe I can actually lose weight because I can't snack!

Hubby won't be visiting Chuck today (who isn't doing well at all) but has gone to his bible study and then will go get his Lupron shot before heading home. He was concerned about getting back in time as we need to leave by 11a to get to Dr. Mark's by 12p.  He's got a biopsy scheduled on a mole.  He was telling me I had to go to Ironwood to pick him up in case the shot runs late.... I told him no, he had plenty of time to get the shot and get home.  So he left angry at me cause I wasn't going with his decision.  Now you watch.... they will run really late (as they always do) and I will have to run down and pick him up and head on to the doctor's office!

I think my eyes were bigger than my stomach again - I filled my bowl up too high with cereal (who can resist the frosted shredded wheat?) .... I don't think I can eat them all now.  Oh well.  Probably shouldn't anyway.

Psalm 71:1 (NKJV):  In You, O Lord, I put my trust; let me never be put to shame.

How much do you trust God?  Many of us would immediately respond with "I trust Him with all my heart!"  But in reality, do we?  Really?  It is one thing to 'say' we trust Him, but does our heart agree with what our mouths say?

As I pause here and think about that, I want to say that Yes, I put all my trust in God.  He has never failed me, why would I not trust Him?  Does He answer every request I've made - no.  Does He even respond with an answer when I ask?  Not usually.  So why do I trust Him so?

Because He is God and I am not.

There doesn't have to be any other reason, does there?  He is my Creator; He created me in my mother's womb.  He caused me to breathe when I was born.  He walked with me through many trials and tribulations as I was growing up; He never left me, even when I had turned away.  He had to turn away for He cannot look upon sin (remember, He turned away from Jesus on the cross because Jesus carried all our sins to the cross on His  shoulders!).  He has never left me alone.

And He won't leave you alone either.  He may - or may not - answer the prayers you pray in the way you ask.  It isn't that He is 'picking and choosing' which ones He wants to answer.  He knows the outcome of those answers and knows what needs to be done.  He does work in mysterious and miraculous ways!  I've seen Him do both!  

But the best thing that God has done for me, is that He chose to save my soul, rescue me from the depths of hell, and set my feet on His solid ground. Hallelujah!  It doesn't mean my life is perfect, by no means!  But I know that if God loves me enough to rescue me, then He loves me enough to walk with me through any trial I face.  He is my strength, my shield, my all in all.  He is my TREASURE here on earth.  My God has cattle on a thousand hills; He can easily take care of whatever troubles me today or any day.  Yeah, He's that good.  And He loves me.  And He loves you.

My friend from work called me yesterday and she is planning a 'glam evening' for several women and invited me to come.  It's in October, and I will need to get a hotel room (she lives in Chandler), but I really want to go. Of course I will probably have to take hubby since I want to stay overnight rather than drive home late, but that's ok. Not the first time, and probably won't be the last. He stays at the hotel.  I'm getting pretty good with navigating myself around anywhere (thanks to GPS).  But it will be a fun time and I get to be with my friend, and other women.  And a weekend getaway for me and hubby.  

Speaking of 'getaway' - we start vacation next Wednesday!  And, in talking with Sue yesterday about the book I read the other night, you know the one where I realized that making my own decision to quit working may not be the plan God has for me, and that I need to keep working until He tells me "you are done'.... I've decided to take more time off work - perhaps only a day here or there, but I think my biggest problem is that I am getting burned out - not so much with work as it is with sitting here at the computer five days a week, with interruptions from hubby every single day, and just not having any time for just me.  I don't know what I'll do on those days, but it is something I am going to be thinking about.

And in thinking, I need to get off here and get to work - have meetings to schedule. Ugh. This one has people in central time, and eastern time, and I have to schedule the people here in MST.  I do not like time zones when it comes to meetings!   Anyway - got to get off here -

Praying for you, that the Lord will bless you today in ways you could never expect.  Be watchful; He is working in you and around you.

Blessings!

Getting an early start

 because I have a 6AM board meeting in the morning and I know I won't have much time to write in here - if at all.  So figured if I type 'something', you'd at least have something to read, right?  I usually tell you about my day anyway.... just saying.

So my Wednesday started out picking hubby up at AAA as he wanted them to do an oil change.  I'm irritated.  I get the notices from AAA because the account is in my name.  I called AAA this afternoon and asked if his car was ready, and was told yes.  So I asked how much.  $221.84.  Ok, so why so high?  I had reviewed the list of things they suggested needed done - and told them all NO.  He not only asked for an oil change, rotate tires, but also an A/C 'recharge'.  What the heck is that?  He never told me a word about it.  I know, he was 'afraid to'.  He acts at times like I'm the wicked witch of the west because he is afraid to tell me the truth. Anyway - it was done.  I dropped him off and came back to work.  Left him to pay for it. 

But my day did start off better when I met Sue for breakfast at our usual place.  I was able to give her the retirement gifts I had for her, and she gave me a birthday gift bag.  That was fun too!  We are already making plans for December 4th - that's the day we go to the Christmas Idea House - and have done it for about 10 years I'm guessing?  I don't know - but it's always fun to go to. She reminded me to put in PTO for that date - so I did that as soon as I got back home.

I take hubby over to the dentist at 4p Thursday, which, by the time you read this, it will be.  2.5 hours they say, to drill down those front teeth.  $600+.  It's got to be done so no sense in putting it off.  Then, we will have to figure out a trip to Tempe, which I will have to take the entire day off cause hubby can not go down there by himself.  Talked with Sue about it this morning, and it's not a problem.  See what I mean by having a great boss and a good job?  If needed, I can take off work.  Friday I have to drive him down to see Dr. Mark about getting a biopsy of a mole on his forehead.  Bet he uses his walker to go in to the office.  Ya think?

Yeah, I started the above yesterday afternoon, plus a little more which I deleted this morning.  Let's see if I can finish this in a short amount of time. Yes, I still have that board meeting at 6a.  It is just way too early to be that alert!  But then, I was in bed by 8p last night; I couldn't keep my eyes open I was so tired.  

But I did finish God, Where are You? by John Bevere.  Personally, I got a lot out of it, and especially the last two chapters I think it was.  The basics of it is that God has His own timing for things to happen.  God knows when we should leave jobs, and when we should stay.  He knows what the big picture is, what the future holds.  I have no clue.  So, guess I need to get all this retirement wishes out of my mind for the time being, for it apparently is not in His picture for me at this time.  I definitely do not want to 'jump ship' and then cause us financial stress over something.  If I want for His timing to bring it all together, I will not have the stress I will have going 'over His head' and doing what I want.  Make sense?  Sometimes it is just better to wait on God and let Him tell me when it is time.  So the question comes down to, do I trust God as much as I say I do?  I certainly do not want to get ahead of Him, so even though I'd love my time back, I will submit to Him and His timing.  I think I do need to take time off occasionally and do some of my projects; maybe that will help me chill and feel better.  I don't mind working, I really don't.  I couldn't stand not doing anything.  But I think I am getting somewhat burned out with the every day same thing.... and hubby interrupting all the time doesn't help.  If I was in the office, I probably wouldn't even be interested in retiring - just because of the social aspect. I miss that the most.  Seeing people and having different conversations.

So I need to stop focusing on 'me' and my 'wishes', and instead turn my focus on work and how I can do better at it, plus in my 'down' times I can work on some of my projects.  If the company doesn't get the contracts it is trying to get this next year, my working may be a mute point.  Perhaps I need to keep working until we find out about those anyway.  Will see!  

Deuteronomy 32:4 (NKJV):  He is the Rock, His work is perfect; For all His ways are justice, a God of truth and without injustice; righteous and upright is He.

All of God's ways are perfect; His way is perfect, His knowledge is perfect.  God has never made a mistake; He will not mar that record when guiding His children.

Doesn't that statement cause you to 'feel better'?  You can trust God; He doesn't make any mistakes. I know sometimes we wonder about that, don't we, when things don't go the way we think they should if governed by God, but if we step back and look at the big picture, He knows how it will end, and He knows what to do and He knows..... period.  We can trust Him.  We can believe in Him.  We can let God be God, for He is.  And we are not.

And with that - sorry - but I got to get dressed and set up for the board meeting.  May you have an amazing day today!  The week is nearly over - whoo hoo!

Blessings!

She didn't do it....

 I noticed mid-morning that Sue didn't Teams message me that she had 19 days left, have a good day, etc.  I started to Teams message her... but got to thinking that maybe she didn't want to 'flaunt' to me that she was retiring. She knows how much I'd love to be 'free' from work.  So I just accepted it, and moved on.  We did 'chat' later in the day, but the number of days and retirement never came up.  Besides, I get to see her this morning for breakfast!!  Yes, I'm needing to cut time short in here this morning because I need to take a quick shower and clean up and .. well, have an errand to do before I can head to our meeting place.

Hubby made plans with AAA Repair to get an oil change for his car... and of course he forgot I could possibly have an engagement during the week... so he scheduled it for 8a this morning.  They open at 7:30a so he can take the car down then, BUT... although the reminder, which they sent to me as 'the account' is in my name, stated he would wait for the car to be done, he is insisting (to me) he did not tell them he would wait, so I need to follow him down, pick him up, and bring him back home before heading over to the 'meeting place' with Sue.  It's annoying, yes, but it's better to subject me to him than him sit around until someone comes in who can take him back home (probably around 8-ish).  I tried to explain last night that they obviously have him first on the schedule as he will be waiting, but he doesn't care. I reminded him he always sat at Liberty Buick when he took his car in, unless it was something 'big'.  Nope, I had to pick him up and bring him back home before I could head out.  Makes sense, if you are insecure in your own ability to do things, right?  He will wait until I am back home to run him back down to get his car.  And that's ok.  Funny thing, I will get the email to see what is wrong before he does, more than likely. Hopefully, for then I can see 'truth' in what needs to be done, if anything. I'm dropping 'hints' of selling the car periodically... and of course he goes off on me so I have to be selective of the times I say it.  If I was retired, then he definitely wouldn't need it.... I would be available to take him anywhere.... but then, also... well, I'm leaving it there.

Yes, retirement is on the mind since Sue is retiring and it is 'right there' in the face.  In fact, I met a friend and co-worker for dinner last night and we talked for nearly two hours!  The 'waitress' kept stopping by the table to see if we needed anything, cause we sat there and kept talking.  She never even filled our water glasses - what's up with that?  Anyway, Idalia and I chatted about retirement, about churches, about God, and what we have been doing.  It was an interesting and lively conversation, and I'm sure people around us wished we would leave, for Idalia talks fairly loud.  But we both gained great insight on things and have agreed we need to meet again soon - it had been over a year this time - so we are thinking about January meet up for dinner again.  Get through the holidays ya know.  LOL  Idalia is one who emailed me when I sent her word about Sue's retirement and she came back with..."I'm sad cause you will probably retire too" and I assured her I wasn't.  At that time. :-) 

Our dentist office called (me) yesterday about scheduling hubby for his two front teeth (that are cracked) that need crowns.  We have him scheduled in September, but she said they had a cancellation for Thursday, did he want it.  Mixed emotions here.  I checked with hubby and HE tells ME to go check his calendar on his desk (he was in the recliner!!) so I did. He had nothing, so we scheduled him in.  This is where it will get difficult.  The dentist will drill and do whatever he needs to in order to prepare the teeth for crowns, and put on a temporary.  THEN in a few days, we will need to go to Tempe (I will have to take the day off work) to go to the lab he uses and have them match color, etc. for the permanent crowns.  I'm not sure if we have to make a second trip or not; cross that bridge when I get to it I guess. Can't let hubby drive to Tempe; I will have to make arrangements for him. I told them we are gone a few days next week so they are going to try to get him in either Monday or Tuesday... and here I was thinking of taking the day off to relax and prepare for our trip.  I wish we weren't going. I do. It's too much stuff going on.

I went to my orthodontist appointment yesterday as well.  I got the first set of liners and a lot of instructions.  I am to wear these for two weeks 24x7 except when I am eating or drinking coffee ort brushing my teeth.  So I although I slept in them last night, I took them out when I got up cause I knew I'd have coffee this morning. I'm going to leave them out for I will be heading out to eat with Sue.  I'll put them back on when I get back home.  One thing about it; I won't be able to sneak and snack (is that a saying?) whenever I want.  Can't eat with these on and I don't want to put on and take off all the time... so the answer is..... don't snack!  Maybe I can lose weight?  Wouldn't that be a novel thing?

Wow - I've written you about my life again... so exciting, right?  But then, what else is there to write about for which I am a 'master'?  HAH!

Psalm 121:1-2 (NKJV):  I will lift up my eyes to the hills - From whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

I know I have shared this scripture before, but it is one of my favorites.  The song, sung many years ago, "nobody knows the trouble I've seen, nobody knows but Jesus" is one that I know I have held on to for many years as well. The two kind of go together, if you think about it.  The struggles I have gone through personally for the past 40+ years, and I'm not pointing fingers at anyone at all, I have often looked to the 'hills' - when we lived where I could see them -  and quoted that scripture to the ONLY One who could help me.  And He did.  I fought depression, I fought myself, I fought oppression.  And only God could deliver me.  And He did.  I cried out to Him many, many times and He answered.  No one knows, nor could anyone believe the past.  Only God knows, and it is in Him I put my trust.

Yes, He has proven Himself to me time and again that in my weakest moments He is there for me. Even when I didn't feel Him near, He was there.  How could I not continue to seek Him, to talk with Him, and to long to just sit with Him?  He had nothing to prove to me, but He did.  He is my all in all. 

Perhaps that is why I long so much to get away by myself for a stretch of time, just to sit in His presence.  If the weather was cooler, I could put up the umbrella outside and sit outside and 'rest'. But, oh my goodness, it is toooooo hot and toooooo muggy!  Even I have been sweating - and I don't sweat!   Reminds me, yesterday I was doing HIIT with Morgan - and I had to go get a towel to wipe my face - I was dripping liquid!  Morgan pumped her arm and goes "YES!"  First time ever I went to get a towel to wipe my face with in working out with her.  LOL  I told her I 'glisten', not 'sweat' - and she proved me wrong yesterday.  HIIT was tough!  and yes, I was praying my "LORD, HELP!" throughout the workout.  And He helped me get through it.

And now I'm rambling (again), right?  Got a text from my son already; he always makes me smile when I get them.  It's the little things that bring me joy.  And his thoughtful words bring me joy, for sure.

I may be much later tomorrow morning; I have a 6AM board meeting I have to do the PowerPoint slides and take minutes. Oh joy. 

And with that - I need to get off here and head for the shower.  Wishing you a day that will bring you joy.  Look at things differently.  Feel the blessings that God has already given you, and be thankful.  Seek His face, that He will turn to you and give you peace.

Blessings!

Will be a busy day....

 hopefully I can still get done the things I need to, that I will keep my mind focused and working. What all do I have on my plate for today?  Well..... work, of course.  And then a 10a training with Morgan.  HIIT today.  Wonder what she will have me do.  I flipped the tire as one of the five exercises last time so don't expect it this time - possibly will be the sled. Hubby hates the sled, but I don't mind it so much.  After that I have the orthodontist at 1:30p.  

The liners have come in; I don't know what else to call them.  I'm already self-doubting myself if I should have just let it go and saved the money.  I have always disliked spending money on myself... and although I see where these are 'needed', is it just cosmetic?  Yes, I have pain, and will have more pain with the liners, but it will pull teeth back and give space where it is needed.  They think it can be done in less than two years.... dare I hope?  I should never have gone and then I would not be in this quandry.  Right?  But - I did go and I did order and I will get.    

And around 5-ish I will be meeting a co-worker whom I haven't seen since the company Christmas gathering for dinner at Cracker Barrel.  It's about the half-way mark for both of us.  At least time-wise, I guess.  I don't usually have 'so much' going on in the same day.... it feels weird to know that I have three things to do... and I'm finding I'm wanting to retract into my shell and not go to any of them!  But, I will.

Last night was a quiet evening... for awhile.  When hubby asked if he could watch the ballgame, I reluctantly said ok... and picked up my yarn to work on the project I'm doing.  Not that I was doing anything before; scrolling my phone (I hate it when I look at one thing and next thing I know an hour has passed!!) (or more!!)  I was in the process of putting down my phone to pick up a book.... so I did the next best thing.  I put an audible book on my kindle and sat and crochet'd.  Yes, I can occasionally multi-task!  I do like audible for I can 'read' a book by listening, and with the headset on, I can block out other distractions - plus I can crochet or knit and get a project done as well.

Our grandson in NM called yesterday and we had a nice chat.  Even did facetime.  I had looked at some photos they had posted of recent vacation and photos of the baby - who I think he said is about 16 months now... I had text'd and told them I wasn't going to comment on the photos but just wanted them to know I had looked at them.  He called and it was nice I 'had him to myself' for a little while as I was still back in the office.  I finally took my phone to the front room, where hubby was watching TV of course, and handed him the phone to chat for a bit.  I noticed, while standing next to hubby, something seemed 'off'.  Usually when this grandson calls he will sit up and is somewhat 'lively' in conversation.  This time, to me, he didn't seem to have much conversation... or maybe it was just me.  It was like I had awakened him (and could very well have) and he wasn't fully awake.  As I wrote this paragraph I just remembered that..... 

My sister-in-law called me yesterday too.  That was an interesting conversation.  We don't talk much, and hubby calls his brother more often, as he should.  But, interestingly enough, hubby has told me that he was told by his brother that the SIL can't drive because she's got dementia, and several other things going on.  According to the SIL, she still drives and meets friends for lunch, goes shopping - although at times others do drive (as they do me).... I don't know; she seemed pretty aware of things while we chatted. She was afraid she had forgotten my birthday.  No, she hadn't.  For the past 44 years she has mailed me a birthday card, and us an anniversary card every year.  She never forgets.  She is in her 80's so it would be understandable if she did.  She always sends, and always writes a short note.  Much better than me.... I quit cards a long time ago.  Pretty much, anyway.  If you get a birthday card from me that is purchased, you are special.  Just saying.

Sigh. Every morning now Sue is sending me a Teams message of good morning.... and adds.... 20 more days. Today may be 19 more days.  She is getting excited about retirement, and I don't blame her.  I'm getting that longing again, but don't see how we can do it.  I mean, I know we can make it, we just have to quit doing some things.  And I'm ok with that.  I truly believe that we have more than enough now, and that God will supply all that we need.  But what if... just what if... He has kept me healthy and strong so that I can continue to work?  See how the doubt comes in?  I wish I could get laid off, then it's not ME that is leaving work. LOL  I want someone else to take the 'blame'. Right?

I Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV) Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Yep.  I read that this morning, and even wrote it down, because I need the reminder that I am to rejoice in all things.  God will not allow things to happen to me unexpectedly.  He is well aware of all things, and in all things, He will strengthen and encourage me to keep on.  I do thank Him for my job.  So grateful He has always provided a job for me.  My jobs have always been fulfilling and I have made many friends over the years.  Hubby wouldn't keep a job, leaving for whatever reason he wanted, and then taking several months to find another.  Only to quit again.  And always for less money.  I never understood that.  So when people ask why I can't retire; don't we have a pension or money in the bank... they don't understand.... and I don't need to go into details.  Reminded of that because the grandson asked those questions yesterday.  Painful thoughts.

Anyway.... I can still rejoice, and I can still pray, and I can still give thanks in all circumstances.... because I know that whatever is going on in my life does not escape God's notice.  He sees me.  And He loves me. And He will walk me through anything that comes at me.  If I continue working, He will help me until the end.  His purposes are better than mine. His desires for me are greater than anything I can come up with.  Be patient, I tell myself.  God is still at work in me.

And He is still at work in you.  Never give up.  Keep seeking, keep praying, keep loving God.  He is for you, not against you.  No matter what the enemy throws at you, God is for you and He is with you through the journey, through the fire.  I know it.  He has walked with me through many, many trials and hardships.

At times my heart is breaking, He is my Comforter.  When I don't know where the next dollar comes from, He is my Provider.  When I need help, He Supports.  When I just need Him...... He is always there for me.

And He is there for you.  Always.  Seek Him and know Him.  You will find your peace and your joy.

Have an amazing day!

Blessings!

It was a great message yesterday

  Pastor George from our church, although not on staff, spoke yesterday.  He said he turned 79 the other day - and when people started to clap, he said to stop - the only thing you get when you turn 79 is a colonoscopy.  Only he said it in a way that it was funny.  We all laughed.  But the message he gave was very good.  In fact, I'm going to go right into it cause I want to share while it is still sorta fresh on my mind.

Joshua 17:14-18 (NKJV):  The the children of Joseph spoke to Joshua, saying, "Why have you given us only one lot and one share to inherit, since we are a great people, inasmuch as the Lord as blessed us until now?"  So Joshua answered them, "If you are a great people, then go up to the forest country and clear a place for yourself there in the land of the Perizzites and the giants, since the mountains of Ephraim are too confined for you."  But the children of Joseph said, "The mountain country is not enough for us; and all the Canaanites who dwell int he land of the valley have chariots of iron, both those who are of Beth Shean and its towns and those who are of the Valley of Jezreel."  And Joshua spoke to the house of Joseph - to Ephraim and Manasseh - saying, "You are a great people and have great power; you shall not have only one lot, but the mountain country shall be yours. Although it is wooded, you shall cut it down, and its farthest extent shall be yours; for you shall drive out the Canaanites, though they have iron chariots and are strong."

Points that Pastor George made in this message: 1) Ephraim and Manasseh experienced the pressure of the blessing.  What did he mean by that?  

They forgot from where they came.  Think about it.  God had brought the tribes out of Egypt, out of slavery.  He lead them 40 years through the wilderness (until that generation died cause they grumbled all the time and didn't obey God to go into the Promised Land!)  Ephraim and Manasseh were blessed and their families grew (as did the other tribes) and now they were complaining that they had grown so big they needed more room.  But were they willing to go out and fight?  So what if the  Canaanites had iron chariots - wah! - what did God do to the chariots that followed them out of Egypt and tried to capture them?  They FORGOT what God had already done.  

They FORGOT from where they had come.  They were living on land they did not till.  They were living in houses they did not build. They were living off food that had grown they had not planted  - and they were complaining because they wanted more.  Just because God has blessed us, doesn't mean we have all we want. We all want MORE.

The pressure of the blessing causes self-pity, and we become self-centered, and want more. And more. And more.  Even too much is not enough when we have the pressure of the blessing.  God gives us everything we need, but when we focus on what we need and not on God, we become self-entitled and self-centered.

There is a difference between Inheritance Mentality and Entitlement Mentality.

Inheritance Mentality - all we get we give back to God. He supplies, we surrender what we have to Him.

Entitlement Mentality - what we get is never enough.  We always feel we are entitled to have more.

Other thoughts - People say they want to hear from God, but they won't read their Bible, nor do they sit quietly and give Him time to speak.

Psalm 46:10 - Be still and know that I am God.  

We come from a God who parts water; from a God who conquers the enemy.  

We are strong with God.... whatever comes against us.... go back from where  you came.  (i.e., when you had nothing, and God supplied)   Trust God to meet all your needs; don't become self-entitled.  It all belongs to God anyway.

Good stuff, don't you think?  I'm glad I am sharing it; hopefully I will keep it in my mind and 'remember from where I came'.

Got a text from my son that reminded me I hadn't finished this for today.  Work always seems to get in the way.  And training.  LOL I have 11a today.  Upper body.  HIIT tomorrow at 10a.  Trust me, I can look back when I could barely lift a few pounds - and now I can flip 178 pound tires!  God is good.

Hubby had said we were going to 'talk about my retirement and the bills' this weekend - I didn't say anything; and he must have forgotten.  Just when I resign myself to working until I die.  LOL At least I am doing something, right?  I can't do anything now if I wasn't working.... only difference is I wouldn't be sitting in front of a computer all day and doing 'stuff'.

Am I feeling entitled?  LOL  God has always provided for us over the years.  Some day I will have to sit down and share some of His marvelous works for us... if I can remember them all!

In the meantime - I need to answer my boss and get to work.  Hope you have an amazing day and 'remember from where you were, to where you are now'.  How has God blessed you?

Blessings!

Sunday laziness....sorta

 As I've mentioned many times lately, I love my Sunday mornings when I can stay in here until about 10a if I want to.  We go to church at the 12p service so don't usually leave here until 11:30-ish.  We're about 6 minutes away from church.  Long drive, right?  Anyway, I do enjoy these mornings when I can read and not keep an eye on the clock; journal for as long as I want. And write in here, of course.  I actually stopped my reading this morning to do this now, and then will get re-focused when finished.

I read the entire book of Colossians this morning.  It has a lot of 'good stuff' in there.  I read a book one time, actually I've read it several times, and I think it is called "What happens when women pray" by Evelyn Christenson.  There was a book that a dear friend, Janie Forney, once recommended to me when I went to the altar one weekend up in Prescott at our Women's Retreat in my early years of becoming a Christian.  I had so much to learn and I was so hungry to learn it!  All I could think of was my failures, my sinfulness, the things I had done that I definitely should not have done.  Ashamed always, I would run to the altar, sure that God could not forgive me for what I did, but desperately hoping that He would.  I was reminded of Janie, and that book, as I read Colossians this morning.  Especially chapter 3.  After I had read her book, I didn't WANT to read Chapter 3 in Colossians!  (Now you have to go read it to understand somewhat the why I didn't want to read it! LOL)

I had a lot of anger within me. I had a lot of disappointment.  I had a lot of me that kept getting in the way of living the way I felt I should as a Christian.  Me still gets in the way a lot of times, but I'm still learning how to give it to God and let Him change me.  I definitely can not change on my own; I desperately need Him to change me.  I'm learning to be more patient. I'm learning when I need to assert myself and not be so passive.  For so many years I had to be the quiet one, the submissive one, because I thought that was what I was to be if I was a Christian.  I've learned that being submissive and assertive are two different things, and it is ok if done the right way.  I've tried hard to be what I thought I should be.  And I've learned that all I was to be was His, and allow Him to work in me.  It's not my choice on what needs to be changed in me; it is His choice to work on whatever area He chooses. And, yes, I still have lots that needs work on.

Digging through disappointment and the pain of disagreements has been difficult.  I know I share way too much on this blog, and yet, just writing it in here, and reading what I write, is helpful at times.  Many times I've had to go back and delete; go back and reword something, or just change it.  Many of my 'hard times' is my own fault.  When one doesn't know what they are capable of, they tend to step back and do nothing.  Some of you may feel that as well, and understand fully what that statement means.

Changing subjects, I enjoyed my morning with my friends at Needles of Hope yesterday.  My friend, Lori, brought a tub of 'end pieces' of yarn (meaning leftover from projects) and some sewing stuff that had been donated.  As usual, I let the others take what they want, then I take whatever is left home with me.  My baby blankets are usually of different colors so I just work them in different baby blankets.  Saves me going out to buy yarn that I really don't have a place for - or need.  My daughter gave me her yarn stash when she moved and it's still out in the garage.  Maybe that will be a project for this afternoon - if I remember it - and that is try to bring some organization to my yarn stash.  I have yarn here, there, and yonder.  

I probably should have visited Ms. Vicky yesterday evening, but I just didn't want to. Could it be because hubby kept telling me I should go see her?  He was watching the ball game (do you want to watch a movie? I'll turn this off.  Don't you need to go see Vicky?)  Don't tell me what to do!!  So I didn't go, and will probably 'need' to go for an hour this afternoon.  It's not that I mind going over, but it is boring after awhile; it's the same topics (HOA, her going to the pool, why don't I go to the pool with her...etc.) and after awhile, I'm just ready to leave.  I still have not see Ms. Diane now in months. And I feel bad. She's not that far away - 12 minutes, I think - but it's getting in the car and going.  I should.... and the guilt trips start.  sigh.

Philippians 2:12 (NKJV):  Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.

Paul, in Philippians 2:12, does not say that we have to 'work out our own salvation'.  God has already worked to make our salvation possible.  Our role, as a Christian, is to work out what God has worked in by cultivating the characteristics of a godly life.  When we are faithful to strive to walk as Jesus walked, it allows us to shine as lights in the world.  The call to discipleship is costly at times.  We need to let go of the world, and grab hold of what Christ has for us, even when we don't understand what it is.

Even after 40+ years of following Jesus, after reading my bible over and over every year, diving deep into other books to understand the will of God, I still have so much to learn!  Lately I have learned more about the Sabbath and how important it is to step away from our phones, from some who distract us, step away from the TV and even our hobbies at times.  Honoring the Sabbath is more than taking a Saturday or Sunday to sit around and watch movies, taking naps, working on hobbies.  Honoring the Sabbath isn't just going to church one of those days.  Honoring the Sabbath is being with family and friends, putting aside those things that distract us during the week, and focus upon people, and focus upon the One who made us in His image.

That's one reason I love Sunday mornings.  I can spend more time reading my Bible, learning how I am to live for Him.  I can read other books that help me to make the right choices, see things a different way.  Sometimes I can be 'straight minded' in that I believe my way is the only way.... and yet, I can read a book that will give me another viewpoint that I may not have thought about.  The Bible always, always, rules, of course.  No matter what the world says, the Bible stands firm.  I base my faith on Jesus Christ and I stand on the Bible as my directions on how to live for Him alone.

Living for Jesus does have its perks.  But there is always conflict as the devil is always trying to speak into your ear that you 'don't have to do that' or 'what the Bible says, well, that was in the olden times and doesn't apply now'... or Satan will try to tell you that you are unforgiveable.  Trust me, he tells me that all the time.  But Jesus says, I am forgiven.  Jesus says I am redeemed.  Jesus says I am loved.  And if Jesus says it, then it is TRUE.  

Reminds me of the movie Overcomer by the Kendrick Brothers.  It's about a young girl who is a runner... and the coach 'just happens' to accidently find a man who used to be a runner when he went to the hospital to visit someone else.... and I'm not going to mess up the story.  But this young girl was asked the question "Who are you?".  At the time she couldn't answer.  But as she dove into her Bible, she discovered who she was, and her response is worth watching the movie.  I love it.  Maybe I can get hubby to watch it this afternoon.  Who are you?  More than anything else, more than life itself, I am His.

May the Lord bless you and keep you.  May He turn His face to you and look upon you.  May He grant you the pleasure of His company.  May He lift you up.  May He bring you healing in heart and body and mind.  May He bring you joy.

Blessings!