As I type those words my thoughts go to my own (real) father. I wish my children could have known him. I wish I could have known him. My memories of him are so limited. He was a good looking man, of that I have seen in photos. My big brother looks a lot like him. I do to, in a small way, I think. Ironically, my big brother and I are so totally different from the rest of the family, it's almost funny. We both choose to be all that we can be. We are different, and yet, we have a lot of the same traits. But we are much different than the others in that we take better care of ourselves than they do. At least I think so. Not to brag, but out of my family, I think I am the healthiest. That's what living away from all the family 'stuff' does for you. :) I often have wondered what my life would have been like had I grown up with my father.
Memories fade over time. And, being so young, I have to go on stories I hear. My youngest sister was only 1 1/2 so she has no memories of daddy. We often have talked 'what would our lives have been like' and generally agree that they certainly would not be what they are now, in many respects. Part of our lives have been along a rough road that no one would understand. But that's all in the past and we have moved on.
I will send a text of 'happy Father's Day' out to my boys in a bit; I don't like to text anyone this early in the morning for I don't want to wake them up. Just because I am up, does not mean they are. I know all my children miss their father. And that breaks my heart. I do too, but they don't understand that. None of us understand why things happen they way they do. But God had a plan in all of it. He had to.
Treasure the moments you have with your children, for the time is flying by. Before you know it, all will have children of their own. And they will get to share memories of their time with you. What will they pass on to their children? Will their children get to know the love you have for them? Will your children remember the love you have for them? Right now it may not seem like they care, but they are collecting memories that will come back in the future. I know. Because I remember now. And sometimes my children remind me of things (some I wish they'd forget!). Treasure your time with your children, your grandchildren. Some day, that will be all they have. Love them. Be a part of their lives. Not just today, but every day. Make those memories, and make them count.
On a more positive note, cause my memories are taking over my mind this morning and I have to stop, it is going to be another hot day. I made blueberry jam yesterday. I wonder if any of my children eat jam. Seems like that answer is 'no'. But upon a piece of toast, sometimes it is so good. I may have to freeze some of it as it will only last 3 weeks in the refrigerator, I think, cause I don't put any pectin or sugar in it. It is just blueberries. So it's healthy. That word is a turnoff for most people, but it works for me. :-) I have extra if any want some.
We did a trip to Sam's Club yesterday and it was nice - not crowded like Costco always is. Got a lot of fruit and vegetables for I am going to try for us to eat more healthy. I said try. Did you know that a lot of the processed foods have inflammatory ingredients? I mean they cause our bodies to hurt or ache. We don't think about it, especially when we are hungry. But I am surprised at the number of items that i have purchased in the past that have oils or products in them that cause inflamation in the body. In my quest for us to be healthy, I want to get rid of those things so that as I age, my body doesn't hurt (it doesn't now, but could), and I think more clearly. And not only me, but hubby as well. I can see the effects of aging and not eating quite as healthy as we should have had on him. He gets confused easily; mood swings; shuffles when he walks.... hopefully by changing our eating habits we can reverse some of that.
One week to go on my study of Elijah and some of the questions in this study have been very personal and I've had to be honest with myself in responding. I have a lot of things I need to work on in my life. But one thing will never change, and that is how much I love my family. I may not have been the perfect parent (definitely not); I may not be the perfect grandma (hopefully sometimes), and even as a great-grandma now I'm limited due to distance.... but I hope they each will know the love I carry for each one. They are my joy and pride, and my delight.
Happy Father's Day, dads! As in the Lion King (one of my favorite movies!) Simba is told by Mufasa.....
'Remember who you are."
Have a blessed day!
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