My toe is a beautiful shade of purple, but it doesn't hurt like it did yesterday morning. I could barely walk on it yesterday, but by evening, I forgot that I had even hurt it and was able to walk pretty good. If I move it a certain way this morning, it does hurt, but why sit here and do that to make it hurt? Duh!
I had a nice lunch yesterday with a former boss. I still don't know why she wanted to have lunch with me. We had a nice lunch and talked so much - I didn't even eat my hamburger! Or rather, it's called a 'pub burger' (I should have gotten a salad!). It's a thick hamburger with some kind of sauce on it and onions, and BBQ sauce... and wrapped up in a pretzel bun. Oh I love the bread more than I love the sandwich! Oh - and I can't forget the bacon that is on it too! I ate my french fries, but brought the sandwich home for hubby. I did eat half of it, but left the rest for him.
Work had piled up while I was out for lunch so had things to get done - and hubby comes in questioning about his last covid test in January. The hospital had called about his upcoming surgery on Monday and told him he needed to have a covid test before he could have surgery. I knew what they were wanting... he couldn't understand. FInally I told him that they didn't want his positive test he had in January, he has to go get another covid test that shows negative before they will do the surgery - after all, he will be admitted for an overnight stay. I finally started checking the computer on where he could go and get the test as they needed the results by Friday. I found a place nearby he could go at 4:10PM. Oh no, he couldn't go last night. Why? Well, he was meeting his friends at 6PM. What about Wednesday? So I look and found he could drive a little further, they had an open appointment at 11:30AM. Oh no, he couldn't go then because he was having lunch with a friend. By now I'm getting frustrated. He couldn't understand why I was upset. He calls the hospital and talks to them and eventually asks if he can just use the covid tests we have received from the goverment. YES, the hospital replied. Monday morning he can do the test, then take a photo of the results to prove he does not have covid, bring them with him, and they will proceed with the surgery. Later he asked me why I was so frustrated with him. I told him. I was working; I had things I needed to get done; he wanted me to find what he could do, where he could get the test - then refuses to go when I did find it. Yes, I was frustrated. I calmly reminded him that I was working, and he was interrupting me when he could have done it all himself. He just didn't want to. So I got accused of not caring about him. I can't win.
I have a breakfast meeting scheduled with my boss at a restaurant down the street from where I had lunch yesterday. Yeah, it means I need to jump on the computer early this morning so I can finish up what I didn't get done yesterday with the interruption, and then head out the door to meet her. My boss had commented last week that we need to meet up about every six weeks - and I said ok! Scheduled breakfast this morning for something different (we usually meet for lunch) and in March we'll meet up again somewhere else. It's a nice break for me (and for her) and I schedule when we are both open. If something comes up and one of us can't make it - that's fine too. Hubby is happy; he gets to go to lunch with a friend. He actually goes to breakfast/lunch/dinner at least once or twice a week - and I don't care.
I learned a long time ago not to pray for patience. Why? Because that is when it seems everything goes crazy and you learn patience the hard way! I want it as a spiritual gift given to me. It doesn't happen that way. As a rule, I can be patient. But sometimes I think patience needs a little prodding.
Reminds me of a time when I took a granddaughter, who had just turned 10, shopping. My daughter was more than happy to send me shopping with her to use up birthday money/giftcards becasue she said my granddaughter was a lot like me. I can shop all day - and walk out of every store with absolutely nothing purchased. I will even carry things around with me for awhile - then put every item back where I got it and walk out of the store empty handed. So it was decided that I would take this granddaughter shopping. And we shopped. She wasn't buying anything at the stores, just looking at everything. At the 5th store (truth!) she was walking around and just looking and I commented, "would you please buy something?" She turned and looked at me and said "Oh my, does someone need a nap?"
Yes, I laughed! But she was serious! No, I didn't need a nap - I just wanted her to buy something! And I could see myself in this situation. I loved to browse, but wasn't so much on buying. Now I buy too much - many things I don't need.... and come home and put them away and sometimes don't even use them. But I'm not alone in that respect. I know other people who will buy things (especially at parties where they want you to buy something and you feel obligated and look for the cheapest thing to buy) and eventually will find them and put them in the goodwill or savers bag. My boss had several stoneware pieces she had bought over the years - she did a cleaning of her cabinets and realized that many she had never used - so immediately boxed them up and took them over to a thrift store she donates to. And felt good about it. I need to do that more often. You know, when I see it and realize I don't use it, nor need it, and know of no one else who would want it - put in a box and take it then, and not wait. Why? Because if I hang on to it, I will eventually think that maybe I will use it and take it out of the bag, perhaps use that one time, and put it back in the cabinet, never to be used again.
We do that with life, don't you think? Sometimes we do need to take inventory of who our friends (or those we think are friends) are and determine if they are truly friends, or people who just hang on to us. You know the kind, those who suck up to us and pretend they are our friends, but in reality, they just want us to make them look good. Those are the kind of people we sometimes need to cut out of our lives. Perhaps not permanently, but keep at a distance. I have some of those friends. I have some that I enjoy being with and we share things together, then there are those who call themselves 'close friends' but yet never have time to listen or time to contribute to things you are involved with. They only want to be with you when they get something out of it. It doesn't take long to figure out who those people are.
But we are called to love them anyway. I have some family members that I enjoy being with, some that I am close with, some that drive me crazy, some that is better it is an occasional thing. But I love them anyway. I have some friends like that too. Most are weeded out because I have to keep working and they are retired and enjoying life.
I'm reminded in a book I'm reading about Joseph (yes, chaning the subject).... if you recall his dreams of his brothers bowing down to him, of his brothers selling him into slavery, his being sold to Potiphar, being thrown back in prison, his interpretation of the baker and the cupbearer's dreams, and eventually getting out of prison and becoming the second in command of all Egypt. The story goes on, but the part I'm thinking about this morning is that those times he was in a prison, he never gave up on God. The times he felt alone, crushed because of what his brothers did to him, missing his younger brother and his father, he continued to seek God. He never held bitterness and anger against his brothers when they came to him for food, but after a series of tests, revealed himself to them. When their father did die, the brothers were afraid that Joseph would take his revenge, but he told them that God had allowed all that he went through so that he could help them during this famine. God had taken care of him, had provided good, along with what he was going through in prison. Joseph learned how to lean into God, and not look at his circumstances.
How many times do we bury ourselves in our circumstances, and not lean into God to let Him lead us to the outcome? So many times our circumstances are the result of our own interventions. Our words get us in a lot of trouble. Neglecting to say 'I'm sorry' sometimes will build a wall. We all think that life is hard and many times it is our own fault. Choices we have made, and then we don't want to right those choices and make it better. And family conflicts happen. Children divorce parents, parents divorce children, conflicts happen and no one is happy, becuase there is no communication, no 'I'm sorry', no let's make this right. Joseph chose to lean into God. Who do we lean in to when we are struggling?
It's early yet this morning and I need to not only lean into God, I need to get my butt moving and jump on the computer since I will be leaving in a couple hours to head to breakfast with my boss. Hubby is still angry with me (actually angry with himself, but he has to work through that) so it will be nice to get out of the house for a little bit. I know I've rambled (again) this morning, but I hope in all the rambling you have something to think about. What, I have no idea. Sometimes I think God lets me ramble because something triggers a thought that one needs to think about.
I Corinthians 10:24 (NKJV) "Let no one seek his own, but each one the other's well-being."
Blessings!
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