but today - most of it anyway, will be very intense. I had some struggles with work yesterday morning. First of all, it was timecard day - which I had forgotten about - but no big deal; I've got it down now on how to approve timecards. Then I couldn't get one timecard to come up. I did everything (I thought) I was supposed to do, but it wouldn't come up. So I contacted an admin who had helped me before, and we walked through it - and then I realized what I had NOT done ... I was bringing up 'previous schedule period' and not 'previous pay period'. It does make a difference; I wasn't to approve the schedule but the pay period. Got that done. Then a director emailed me with the question of 'how do I?' and I drew a blank. I could not remember how to do what she asked. Luckily she had included someone else on the email and they responded back. It was a morning where I was questioning my ability to do tasks - I couldn't remember! I had only done this task one time a few weeks ago and I played with it to figure it out. I'm still learning about the new system. But still, the thoughts were entering my mind about not being able to remember, perhaps I need to consider............. hubby wouldn't like those thoughts at all!
The day went on by and then around 3PM another director assigned me a task. Sounds simple enough, she gave good instructions on what she wanted done. But I don't work with Teams (Microsoft Teams) except for meetings. I haven't had to, nor do I want to. And she assigned me a task. 8 documents in this Team site that I needed to copy and paste into another document, align margins, change font, number pages, and a few other things. I sat and stared at it for several minutes because I wasn't sure what she was asking. I finally did one, step by step as she told me, and then sent it to her to look at. Was this what she was asking me to do? And, yes, it was. Once I got confirmation that it was, I was able to get a couple more completed before I signed off for the day. But it is tedious work and takes a lot of time to complete just one, getting everything aligned. And my 'don't want to' kept getting in the way. Ever have those days? Where your 'I don't want to do this anymore' keeps getting in the way of 'I need to get this completed'? I will need to work on those first thing this morning and get them finished. At least I think my attitude about it is better today. Not sure what my problem was yesterday; I was just feeling so tired and weary, for some reason.
And then also in the afternoon I got notification that another director - whom I do not know - gave me access to his Team site. I DON'T WANT ACCESS TO ANY OF THEM! I have about 30 (not kidding!) Teams files on my computer and I don't work with any of them. WHY all of a sudden are people deciding I need to go into their folders and do some work for them? I don't want to! I don't have anything to do with their departments; why are they giving me access??!! UGH. Then I try to tell myself that if I applied myself, I could learn a lot of things. But I don't want to learn new things. I want to be left alone. But, as long as I'm working, I don't have much choice, do I? UGH UGH UGH
Wow - I'm a grumbler today, aren't I! I need to work on that this morning before I turn on my work computer. Or even perhaps before I shut this one off! Today, plus two days... and I'm off work for three days. I need to 'hold that thought', right?
A granddaughter contacted me last night with school photos of my great-granddaughter. She is so beautiful, and looks so much like her mama! We had a great conversation and it felt good to know she wants a good foundation for her child. I shared with her that 'A mama's greatest joy is that her children are walking with the Lord'. She agreed, and I'm glad her little one is getting that foundation laid in her life.
Proverbs 22:6 (NKJV) "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."
That foundation was also laid in my life as I was growing up. I did walk away from it - not really understanding it - for some years, but 39 years ago I finally understood that Jesus is all I need. Not saying my life was perfect from then on out, for it definitely wasn't. And still isn't. But I knew that I had to make Jesus Lord of my life if I was going to live life to the fullest. It is a step I have never regretted making. I tried to instill this foundation in my own children, but alas, like me, they have chosen to reject Jesus and do their own thing at this time. COVID played a part in some not attending church; I get that. Many times I do not want to go personally to church; I love having jeans and t-shirt and no make-up on and sitting in my chair crocheting while watching the service. Doesn't mean we don't participate in the worship and service; just means I'm comfortable. But I also know we can't fellowship with other believers if we aren't there with other believers.
We did go to the 9AM service on Sunday (instead of the 11AM service) and it was good. We felt more a part in that there were people that came to us and talked with us, where we didn't have that in the 11AM service other than our friends. The preacher was good; he read and stuck to the scripture and it was a good message. We sorta liked knowing that by a certain time we'd have to be out so that the 11AM group could come in - but being Easter, it did go over. I understand when the Holy Spirit takes over the worship you should let it flow and not cut it off, but sometimes I must miss it totally for it feels like it becomes a performance after awhile. Or my critical spirit is coming out. We may end up at this church, but we both agree that the 9AM service would have to be the one we go to.
I think I've 'lost' my garden. I looked at it Sunday morning and although a few leaves had been eaten, it wasn't bad... yesterday morning I went to check on it and nearly every single leaf of every plant - but one romaine lettuce plant - was eaten. All that was there was stalks. Even my herbs! ALL of the cilantro, which hadn't been eaten before, was stalks! I cut them all down, put a mixture of dishsoap and water on it, and now I wait. So disappointing. I had some dreams of it all being full and growing... and bugs are eating it all up. Other than that one worm, I have seen no bugs or worms. But something is obviously getting into the garden at night and eating every single plant - the cilantro, basil, mint, rosemary, my spinach is gone, so disappointing. Next year it may be flowers in my garden! In fact, I may get one or two now and put in there with the hopes of getting rid of these bugs. I heard marigolds keep mosquitos away and we have those little tiny ones that drive me crazy when we sit out front in the early evening. So much for being a farm girl.
It's kind of like life, isn't it? We are planted in a firm foundation and it doesn't take long before the world starts nibbling at us. It throws things at us that seem good, and they feel good, but they end up destroying us, till we are but a stalk of what we should be. We allow the worms and bugs to keep enticing us, till our strong green leaves of life become barren and we become empty stalks, empty of the life that God has for us. We get cut down, but do we begin to grow again? Do our leaves come forth to be eaten again? Do we allow the things of this world to capture us again? That is up to us. Do we wash off those bugs of deceit with soap and water and choose to live again? Something to think about.
Today is Tuesday and another busy day ahead of me. I don't mind the work; I just don;t want to learn new things if I don't want to. I was having such a rough day yesterday I even ate a dish of ice cream last night and I haven't done that for some time! Of course it didn't help either that the two pounds I had lost two weeks ago came back after Easter lunch!
Psalm 118:24 (NKJV): "This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it."
Ok - I'm making a choice to rejoice in today and change my attitude because the Lord made it and has allowed me to be in it. What are you going to do?
Blessings!
