coffee just isn't 'doing it' this morning for me. I'm tired. I don't know why I had so much trouble staying asleep last night. I kept waking up throughout the night and would be wide awake. Then try to go back to sleep was almost impossible. I forced myself to not look at the clock or my watch. No, it wasn't 'dinging' during the night. My watch alarm did go off at 4AM, which I turned off - pretty much in my sleep as I remember turning it off - and then I went to sleep. Hubby got up sometime after that. I awoke about 4:50AM or so and knew I needed to get up. And I cannot believe that I have fallen asleep in here while I was praying. I'd start praying, and to sleep I went. I guess I need to pray with open eyes for awhile. I don't know what is going on with me to have such rough nights lately. I pray over my children and give them to God so I'm not worried about them. Maybe I need to have another quiet time at night so that my mind will be totally at rest so I can sleep? I just can't seem to get enough rest, although I still go to bed at my usual time.
Yesterday was busy, boring, and one of those days. Lots of meetings to schedule; some I should have scheduled and just didn't want to deal with it, had lunch with an 'old' (in time years) friend, did a run over to Macys to pick up an order. To the gym last night; visited Ms. Vicky as she had called and wanted me to come over. Back home for about an hour and then to bed. Too much excitement in one day?
Hubby has his Bible study this morning so I do have some alone time - if I'm not work busy, maybe I can sneak in a nap on a short break? Instead I probably ought to get on the treadmill. But I know I have things I really need to get done that I've been putting off (extending meetings into 2024) so I really need to get that completed. I'm just in a 'I don't want to work' mode, I think. Don't want to take time off work for what would I do? I'd have to take hubby with me in between his activities. I just want to run away all by myself - seriously - and just be alone with God for a few days. I know He can straighten me out. He always does. I'm sleeping too much in my quiet time and not giving Him time to talk with me. I do good to get a few prayers out some mornings as I have to keep an eye on the clock. And of course, I HAVE to write in here! How could you survive without my ramblings of nonsense even one morning?
Just finished reading in Genesis this morning about Jacob wrestling with God as he escapes from Laban, his mother's brother. Do you remember the story? He is on his way to see Esau, his brother, and he is scared. He divides his wives and children, his flocks, his servants and sends them on ahead. He stays and tries to sleep when he finds himself wrestling with God. Guess who won! Jacob's name was changed, and he limped from that time on. Read it - great story. Understand what is going on. Check it out. Genesis 32. Actually read a chapter or two before that and you can see what is going on. Jacob's name meant deceiver, I think, and he was a good one. But that all changed when God got ahold of him!
Just like our lives change when God gets ahold of us! He doesn't force us to change. It is our choice to change, because we want to be like Him. Some of you may have experienced that in your life. Some of you have yet to experience that peace and love in your life. I pray that someday you will find Him and allow Him to work in you and through you, and change your life.
Proverb 9:10 (NKJV): "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding."
In this scripture Solomon states that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, but the fear he is referring to is in terms of the knowledge of the Holy One. For wise, skilled living in the world, especially today, God requires above all, a right understanding of His holiness and a reverent submission to His ways. God is so much wiser than we are - no matter how wise we think we are. When we understand Who God is, and submit to His ways, that He alone is Holy, our lives would be so much easier to live, and so much more fruitful to us.
Do not fear the world and what it is coming to; what is going on - Fear God, for He is the One who created the world and all in it. Not to be afraid of Him, but to fear Him. There is a difference. Do you know it?
Blessings!
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