I read an article within the past few days - don't remember where - in which a man's wife had died and he was in mourning, and had been for awhile. He had dropped out of some activities. He had backed out of socializing as much. I get it. And I'm sure some of you do as well. We always tend to withdraw when we are in pain.
But this article shared that he found some papers written by his wife as he was cleaning out (finally) some drawers, and one thing she said in her diary after she had become sick, was Say Yes to Everything. He never would have read her diary had she still been alive. But he read this, and he realized she was telling him, via her diary, to quit withdrawing from life and start saying 'yes' to doing things. Ah, yes, now I remember the story. The guy was on a grueling bike ride with his brother that he said 'yes' to after reading the diary. He was wondering if he should have said 'no'. He had paused to rest, and a woman stopped beside him and chatted for a few moments before heading off on down the path. They connected a few times and got acquainted, she was divorced. He was a widow. No, they didn't get together, they live in two different states. But he realized that by saying 'yes' to doing something, he was living life again, meeting new friends, and although he isn't ready for a relationship, he was alive.
That story really stuck with me, well, the meaning behind it. I often say 'no' to things. Not because deep down I don't want to do them. Some because I don't want to deal with others who won't do them and doesn't want me to (think hot air balloon ride). But what if I started saying 'yes' to things I 'think' I don't want to do..... and find out I enjoy it? What if I quit letting my thoughts of 'not being allowed or agreed with' to do... what if I quit imagining a battle... what if I decided to DO SOMETHING? What would that look like? What would that be?
Well, I HAVE dared go on trips with my girls for the past ten years... haven't gotten flack about that. We just can't go out of the state. And right now, it's not worth THAT battle. Years ago I used to fly to Indiana for a week to hang out with my sister and visit my mom and family. One year, feeling guilty, I let hubby go with me so he could see his brother. I still remember turning to him in the airport and getting in his face and telling him that if he ........ well, you don't need to know what I said..... that I would never 'take' him with me ever again. I think that was the first time I was adamant that he not screw up. But after that time, I was never 'allowed' to fly back by myself. My sister and I both lament that decision. Although I will admit, there are years I would NOT want to go back. And even now, because people have 'shown' themselves, going back causes me stress because of jealousy of how much time I am spending with siblings versus them. Not going there. It's sad, really.
Ok- getting off topic. Say Yes to Everything. What is it that you have said 'No' to for so long, even thought you wanted to do it, but have put it off? Is it a trip somewhere? Is it getting away by yourself to process and think? Is it a ..... whatever it is..... what is it in life that you have said 'No' to for so long that you don't even think about it anymore? I've sat here a few seconds, trying to figure out where I am going with this.... and heck if I know! I know I am not living the life I would like to live. Perhaps I am not supposed to live that life. But if I'm not, why hasn't God removed that longing in me? Why do I get sad when I think about it? No, not going to share... keep you in suspense. For years I have felt that I have lost my life.... yes, I have gotten to do a lot of things, but there is a part of my heart that still has a longing, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. What dream are you holding back on saying 'yes' to?
Interesting..... I get a text from Messenger each morning (John Bevere's website) and this morning it says: Guard your heart. Not everyone should get full access to your life - even Jesus set boundaries. I could ponder that for awhile, couldn't you?
I had a good day yesterday. Breakfast with Sue, Dr. K and Nancy.... left there at 10:30a and headed to church for the women's luncheon of BBQ pork, potato salad, fruit, etc. Came home and took a short nap (hubby did too) and then we picked up a grandson to take out to dinner. We were told one place, but when we picked him up, he said he wanted chicken strips. He had eaten steak lately and didn't want anymore. We ended up at Chili's for dinner and (I think) we had a nice visit with him. Took him home and we came home and of course we watched movies. We will run over there real quick after church to hopefully see him one more time before he leaves for the recruiter's office. I think my son is taking him at 2p. It will be a quick hug and goodbye, but we are doing it.
For some reason I am reminded of when we went to Tucson to U of A to visit our granddaughter in college; a short visit, and when we left, how hard it was to leave her. She told me later she cried in the parking lot as we left. That still breaks my heart. She was lonely, I'm sure. And I still miss her all these years later. We've got to go on a 'road trip' down there some weekend. I mention hotel and hubby is for it. I just need to pick a weekend and get a hotel and we go. I just don't want to disrupt their schedule with their family, so will need to schedule with them. Soon, I hope.
I John 2:15-17 (ESV): Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world - the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life - is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.
Jentezen Franklin has talked about these a lot - the desires of the flesh, the desires of the eyes, the pride of life. These three things can keep us out of heaven. When we give in to the things the flesh wants.... when we give in to the things our eyes see.... and we puff ourselves up with the pride of life .... we are worldly. We may receive things as blessings, but if we flaunt them before others, it becomes pride. And I quickly think back to the times I have talked about pride and how I have to often root it out of me.
All we have is a gift from God. What we do with that gift, is our gift back to Him.
I think I will end this here. I've rambled on enough this morning. In my prayers this morning for one of my boys, I found myself praying "Lord, please give him a liver that has not been touched by human hands." I have prayed for restoration; I've prayed for a transplant. I haven't ever prayed it like that before. Something to think about.
Have an amazing day - and be kind to someone. You don't know what they are going through.
Blessings!
3 comments:
I didn't make it down to Wildflower, nor the event at the church, yesterday. I was so busy going back and forth to the restroom, I thought it best if I did not go. I did look at the menu items though, and there might have been one or two soups I could have eaten (based on cleansing) but they were not 'flavors' I like in particular. Try something new though, right?
Thanks for the extra prayers. Right now I am trying to release the tension and anxiety I am feeling just waiting on these test results. And also that Mayo doesn't put something new to get done that prevents my getting on the list.
I was re-reading this post this morning, as I kind of like that "Say Yes" story. And it is true. Obviously my Wife hasn't passed away, but we both have said 'YES' to things over just the past 2-3 years (including a hot-air balloon ride - which I will never do again) to try new things with the kids all grown adults now. We have done concerts at the park, plays downtown, the hot-air balloon ride ... Can't remember them all. We don't do them too often, as they do tend to be a bit pricier. Or we have to plan accordingly for a specific date of event.
so glad you are living life.
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