Sunday morning thoughts....

 My right leg bone woke me up about my usual 'get up time.  I still didn't want to get up, but I was definitely awake.  For some reason, I'm thinking of my older sister, Jackie, this morning, and the rheumatoid arthritis she had through out her body and how she would complain about the pain in her legs especially.... I still say it was the bug bites/scorpion bites, or whatever it was that had a meal on the inside of my left a few years back.  I never had any pain in hip nor legs until I got bit.  The dermatologist wouldn't listen to me, the urgent care doctor wouldn't listen to me, and I couldn't get in to see the PCP I had a that time.  So... here I am, occasionally being awakened by severe hip and leg bone pains infrequently.  I will discuss with Dr. Mark when I have my physical in September or October; whenever it gets scheduled. I will insist he send me to a specialist - either testing for RA or ... well, we will wait it out and see.  It's never any fun to be awakened in sharp and severe pain.  My legs are still 'on fire', but not painful, if you know what I mean.  I'm debating on if I want to dress up to go to church this morning, or watch on TV at 10:30a.  Yeah, it's that distracting at this moment, anyway.

Yesterday was a very quiet day for us.  We didn't leave the house.  I made eggs ole for breakfast (without cottage cheese cause we were out again.  Still real good.)  Since it was about 10-10:30a then, we moved right on past lunch.  About 4p I fried (yes, I used my electric skillet) up some pork chops, steamed some red potatoes, opened a can of green beans and heated them up with onions, and sliced a tomato.  That was dinner.  Wasn't fancy, but still good.  Left over eggs ole today, I'm thinking.  At least for breakfast.  

Anyway, off the topic of food and back to the day yesterday..... TV stayed off until about 4p (hallelujah!).  It was quiet.  We read some; I took a short nap.  I worked on some diamond art coasters I had gotten a couple years ago for Christmas. One down, three to go.  Hubby turned on the TV and started watching the 250 celebration and the news... when I was finished with the diamond art, he offered to find a movie. I said no, that was fine (I wasn't watching it anyway).  So he asked if he could switch to the Diamondbacks game; again, I wasn't watching so I didn't care.  He watched the game; I scrolled facebook (I know better; I lose all track of time!!) and then when the game was over, I read some in my Bible before we headed off to bed.  That was our exciting July 4th!  A granddaughter was sending me photos of their little ones, so that made my day complete.

Today is church, if we end up going.  Nothing is planned but hubby will probably have the TV on for something... and of course around 4p NCIS starts their reruns on ION.  I heard Gibbs is coming back for Season 24.  He certainly made the show.  Sad that Director Vance got killed... heard that McGee made Director.  I don't know... don't really follow it, but love the show.  It does keep my interest.  I really need to do some visiting... but sometimes I just don't wanna, ya know?

I do want to do a quick trip to Michael's (since Hobby Lobby isn't open on Sundays) as I need to pick up an embroidery hoop.  I found some Christmas material that I used to make my Christmas quilts out of... kind of makes me want to take a break from crochet and get back to my sewing.  I do have one crib size already put together and ready to stitch... I gave away my hoops as I wasn't using them and didn't know that I would.  I need to check one more place; if I don't have, that is something I need. :-)  Of course I need it.  Right?  But, it still isn't a requirement.... or a real necessity.  I think I have two-three rows yet to do on this one baby blanket I'm working on.  Crochet, that is.  Maybe I will finish it today. But then what?  I have to keep busy!  

My devotionals both spoke to me today.  Sometimes it is other people's thoughts that break through my thinking and cause me to look at things differently.  Well, more differently than I was, I guess.  Isn't my way the best?  I guess it isn't always.  I'm not as smart as I think I am, I'm reckoning.

One devotional was talking about envy.  Now, I don't think I envy anyone.  But I am sure that I compare myself, or what we have, to others at times. You know you do it too.  I don't think I struggle in this area, but I know I get wistful when I go to someone's house and it is decorated so nicely and has minimal 'stuff' all around... and I begin to wish I could get rid of things.... you know I do that - I share so many times I need to 'declutter'!  The author began to say to herself that "I am not equipped to handle what they have, both good and bad."  Sometimes we don't know how good we have it, right?  This author was saying she was envious of another girl's legs.  This was at a Children's Theater in her hometown and both were budding child actors cast in a Christmas play..  The author is 'chunky'; the other girl had long, lean legs and could do all the moves easily.  She was so envious of those legs.  She kept comparing herself to this girl.  Then one day, this girl had left leg pain that turned into a doctor's appointment, that turned into a battery of tests that turned into a hospital stay that turned into a cancer diagnosis that turned into surgery to remove a tumor that turned into amputation, that turned into a complete life change.   In a moment's time, a life was turned around completely.  "I am not equipped to handle what they have, both good and bad." 

The other book I'm reading shared about their love for food, and wanting to break that addiction to food. Now you know how much I love food.  I love making food. I love eating food. I.Love.Food.  Is it an addiction?  Maybe. Maybe not.  Am I addicted to chocolate?  I LIKE chocolate, but as much as I act like it could be an addiction, I think I could say no, it isn't.  Now cookies.  That is a hard one.  Hubby was hungry after dinner still so got a peach of out of the refrigerator.  So what did I do?  I knew there were a few Trefoils left in the freezer.  The very last of the girl scout cookies.  And I got them and I ate all five of them!  Yes!  I did.  And I enjoyed every bite. There were five bites, cause they are small enough I can fit the entire cookie in my mouth at one time and devour them.  I think it is the carbs that draw me to cookies.  Sigh.  But you see what I mean?  Actually, it is any kind of food, not even only junk food.  Except lettuce.  I won't go to the refrigerator and get a piece of lettuce to munch on. Although that would be much better for me, would it not?  Cookies... or lettuce.  Which would you choose?  Sigh. I think my addiction IS food.  I love to cook it, and I love to eat it.  Even when I determine I won't eat certain foods, and even when I think I can do without food for a certain time... without even thinking about it, I can devour something. Whether in the kitchen alone, or sneaking it into the bathroom so that I can enjoy it without sharing it or being watched.   Am I really so bad?

So how do we break these addictions?  Or let me rephrase.... what was suggested to break any addiction?  Memorize scriptures that pertain to what your addiction is.  For me it is food. And I should have memorized these years ago... but although I knew the scriptures, I did not. And I probably won't now, because I am in denial that I have a food addiction.  I just love food.  Is that so bad?  What triggers do I have that cause me to do things I shouldn't do? That I know better than do? That I 'just do it' without even thinking about it?

"Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body."

"You say, "I am allowed to do anything" - but not everything is good for you. And even though "I am allowed to do anything, I must not become a slave to anything."

"They are headed for destruction. Their god is their appetite, they brag about shameful things, and they think only about this life here on earth. But we are citizens of heaven, where the Lord Jesus Christ lives. And we are eagerly waiting for Him to return as our Savior."

I need to change my mindset to 'I can't, but God can, so I give this area of my life to His will.'

So is there something you need to let go of?  We always hear the 'Let go and Let God' saying.  It's easy for some people, but for others it isn't that easy.  I think in changing my mindset to 'I can't, but God can, so I give this area of my life to His will' is a better thought, don't you?

Oh great. Just noticed I chipped my thumbnail. Now how did I do that?  I've been sitting here in my chair for the past three hours - and it wasn't chipped before I started typing!  See how distracting things come to me?  I don't have to even look for them, they just pop up in front of me!

So with that - I'm going to wish you a blessed Sunday, have a wonderful, amazing day in the Lord. Pray blessings over others, you don't know what they are going through. Be grateful for what God has given you, both good and bad, for He has equipped you for such a task.  He will strengthen you; He will encourage you; He will walk with you through that journey. Trust Him.

Blessed Assurance, Jesus is mine!  That song just popped into my mind....

1. Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!
   Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!
   Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
   Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.
   • Refrain:
     This is my story, this is my song,
     Praising my Savior all the day long;
     This is my story, this is my song,
     Praising my Savior all the day long.
2. Perfect submission, perfect delight,
   Visions of rapture now burst on my sight;
   Angels, descending, bring from above
   Echoes of mercy, whispers of love.
3. Perfect submission, all is at rest,
   I in my Savior am happy and blest,
   Watching and waiting, looking above,
   Filled with His goodness, lost in His love.

May you find your day full of His blessed assurance....

Blessings!

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