why? Cause I just wanted to sleep this morning! I'm sure I did sleep some - and you know that kind of sleep, I'm sure. Your mind is all over the place, you lay there and finally think "I'm wasting time"... and realize you have been still for 30-45-60 minutes or more. Yet, you don't feel rested like you slept. But surely we did... right? Yeah, that's where I'm at. And I'm still tired and sleepy.
Work wasn't too busy yesterday, but I did have a run to the dentist to have a filling put in. Can I blame my exhaustion on that? I love this dentist, I've worked with him and now I go to him; I've probably known him at least 20 year. I love his soft voice when he tells me what he is going to do. He always makes sure I hear and understand - and always makes sure I'm ok afterwards. But, in all honesty, going to the dentist is difficult for me. My teeth are a mess from dentists in my early childhood. Back then they didn't try putting in fillings or saving a tooth. It had a cavity - it was coming out - with or without it being numb. I didn't go to a dentist for years - and when I started going to one out here... they had to give me valium and have me sit in the lobby for 30 minutes or so for it to work. One dentist used to give me 'laughing gas' to keep me calm. Yeah, I was a mess. I'm not like that now. I've had dentists who have worked with me through that anxiety and I've managed to get over it. But I do still sometimes grip the chair handles!
Tomorrow is 'the day' that I get my cataract in my right eye taken out. I was reading over the paperwork yesterday. I start the eye drops 3 times today. No makeup for 4 days after surgery. No bending over. No weightlifting for two weeks (darn, and I was going to start a new weightlifting class! - NOT), and I forget what else it said. The paper also said for me to bring a copy of my living will. Now that part is scary, huh! I made a copy of it to take. As I read through it..... I began to wonder if I needed to change some of my decision I made back when I signed it. I mean, we all want to live forever, right? Yesterday I read a story of a man who had some kind of surgery and then went into a coma... after three weeks the doctors told his wife there was no brain activity so wanted to harvest his organs. As they were preparing him, his wife noticed some hand movement and demanded more tests - to discover that the blood was flowing back into his brain and he was fine. He went home a few days later. Makes one go hmmmm..... do I really want my plug pulled? What if?
I refuse to be a burden on hubby or my children. That's why I try to take care of myself and WANT to exercise and keep moving. My excuse now for exercise is that I can't for at least two weeks - and then I hope to have the other eye done - which means another two weeks - I probably ought to wait two months before I start an exercise program, right?
Exodus 20:15 (NKJV): "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you."
As I sit here and look at that verse I am reminded of the saying.... "A son is a son until he takes a wife, but a daughter is a daughter, all of her life." That saying has proved true in many ways. But what most sons don't realize, is that daughters naturally gravitate toward their mothers so that they may learn from them. Boys don't necessarily care about learning from their mothers.
Now, I am close to my daughter and her family because she makes sure I am aware of what is going on in their family. The good and the bad sometimes. We get together often - and yet, there are some weeks we don't connect at all. We generally meet up on Tuesday nights as 'girls night out' that we started several years ago. It was a way to get me out of the house - for which I am grateful. Most weeks that is the only place I go. And we sit and crochet after grabbing something to eat.
My boys - well, they are both married and they are involved with their wives families (or were in the beginning). The longer they are married, the less they are involved within their siblings and parents. I get that. I moved 1800 miles away from mine. Thank goodness for telephones!
Another example is one my little sister always struggles with. She has two boys. One married, one not. The married one she is always complaining he doesn't call, or if he does, he doesn't have much to say. And he will argue with her or tell her exactly what he wants to say. The younger son lives in another state, is still single, but has a girlfriend. He calls her every Sunday, I believe it is, and she shares everything with him. They are much closer than the older son. Now all of this is my own opinion and observations.... but each one has their own lives as well and that doesn't always include mom.
And I have no idea where I am going with all this so am going to hush. I have 12 minutes to jump in the shower and be on the computer - I think I'll be late - which means I need to check the computer first - and see what is on the calendar for 7AM and make a decision on how quick my shower will be.
A friend of mine told me in her last email that I am too wordy. I ramble too much. And I probably do. But the way she said it, hurt. It was like a reprimand. I think it was like "stop the lengthy emails" type of reprimand. As you know, I write whatever comes to mind - whether it is a personal email or my blog.
So - what do you think? Do I ramble too much? Would you rather a paragraph or two of just a topic? Should I share less of my life? My struggles? My Joys? I will have to think about this. In the meantime - have a blessed day!
Blessings!
1 comment:
I like wordy....
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