I decided to take the day off - and I didn't tell anyone except a couple of my bosses and the one who is covering for me today. It will be a very light day anyway. It's Friday, and they usually are. Brett will send emails if he needs to for me to schedule meetings - and they can wait until next week. We have that routine set now - unless critical or urgent, just throw into my email and I will take care of it the next time I work. So - why did I decide to take the day off and not tell anyone?
Because I wanted time to myself. You know how I long for 'alone' time; time with God, time for me. I did have some time alone last night while hubby met up with his prayer partner. (they switched from Tuesday to Thursday for the next six weeks so that hubby can attend the men's bible study on Tuesday nights starting next week). I watched 'I am.... Gabriel', and 'The Girl Who Believed In Miracles'. I cried in the second one. I love those two movies and hadn't watched them for awhile. So I started knitting and watching the movies during my time alone. I loved it.
Today - Morgan text'd me last night that her daughter was very sick so she cancelled my 8AM gym training this morning. Which is nice cause I don't have to jump up and get dressed. Hubby doesn't know I took the day off - nope, didn't even tell him cause I knew he would change his plans. And I don't want him to. I can stay in my jammies as long as I want to this morning! Whoo hoo!! But I do have things I want to do. I've been able to get a lot more reading done this morning than I normally have time for. I've sat quietly and listened for God to speak; praying for those I love. I'm on my second cup of coffee and just finished a belVita cinnamon cracker. Yum.
As mentioned, hubby has gone to his bible study, and the plan is for him to go visit Chuck afterwards - which would get him home around 11AM. See my smile? If he knew I was off, he wouldn't go. Of course he will have to call first to make sure Chuck is up to seeing him today. Recovery from a stroke is hard. But - A morning to myself, to do whatever I want to do (except bake; oven is still out). I'm enjoying right now to just sit here and read, which I may do for a little while yet. It's quiet, and I'm loving it. Alone with my thoughts, my prayers. God is good. How did I just get a day off? I told Sue I was entitled to 3 bereavement days because the death in my family was in another state. I only wanted one day, since I wasn't going to attend. Just one day that I could just ponder being left out of the obituary, one day to have my own thoughts about my step-sister. Which are all good - if anyone is going to make it to heaven, it is Carol. She was the most gracious, kindest, forgiving, and loving person in our family. Very involved in her church, with her family, doing for others. I wish I had kept in contact, but there was no reason to. Anyway, today is that one day I asked for.
I have things I need to do - but will procrastinate until later. Things like getting my tax info together so hubby can add the totals into the ones he has. Write some notes to others whom God has brought to mind a few times. Exercise here at home. Figure out a menu for next week. Yeah, things I COULD do but will procrastinate on and will not. Well, except the taxes, but can put those off until tomorrow.
I want to be productive this morning.... but will that happen? I don't know. Guess you will need to wait and see what I write in the morning. So many things I WANT to do.... I probably should start a list so that when I actually get them done, I can mark them off, right? I just don't understand why I don't have time like I did when the kids were at home, I was working in the office, and teaching classes at church! It seems I had more time to get things done than I do now with working from home, no kids here, and not doing anything but attending church. Sigh. Maybe going to bed at 8:30PM cuts out part of it - but if I tried to do something at night, hubby wants to watch a movie. It's easier to tell him we will read or watch a movie (and I crochet; can't just sit and watch TV).
It was important I get up at 4AM when I was working so that I could have my quiet time from 4-5AM, get dressed for work 5-6AM, and out the door to drive to work and start at 7AM. It's not that important now. At first it was keeping the same times so that I had more time to read in the mornings. But - is it really that important? What if we changed it to 5AM wake up (which it was this morning because I just didn't want to get up and fell back to sleep!), and have 5-6:30 for my quiet time, and then get ready for work. Perhaps I need to actually talk to hubby and tell him what I'm thinking. That means I have to actually talk to him.... and he will ask the 'why' questions - but will agree to it - but that also means we CAN stay up later (although weekends we do sometimes tend to stay up to 9 or 10AM. I just feel we need to re-evaluate. Hubby does a lot more reading than I do in the mornings because he has all day to do his reading.
I just remembered.... hubby told me last night that as he sat and read yesterday morning, he felt a heaviness come upon him as he thought about me not being able to have more time to read in the mornings like he does. Interesting thought... and I am assuming it went away for he mentioned nothing about retiring. I have set a date in my mind - always subject to change, of course - but I don't think I can retire as long as we live here. They have those monthly fees which are now around $400 since they raised it again (HOA), and then there is the $600 Rec fee I have been told we will get in July. I still think we can make it, but a lot of things we do will halt. Or will need to halt.
But when I think about retiring, what would I do? We don't have money to fun travel with. Hubby never stayed with a job long enough to have a 401K or a pension. As far as I know, we don't have any 'extra' bills - other than hubby's car payment and our insurance and warranty insurance. Some day I need to sit down with the joint account and go through everything that comes out of it. And then go through my credit cards and see what I pay from it for the house. Then perhaps I can figure out what we would actually need to live on. There are things I'd like to do - take long walks (which hubby says he can't do so won't even try), do a lot of baking and give it away, read, visit lonely people in nursing homes, volunteer at various places. So many thoughts and ideas, but don't know if I could do any of them - if you know what I mean. I need to 'setttle' on one or two - not everything. My time is limited.
Good thing I love to cook, right? I can go back to making things from scratch. Always fun to do anyway. Which reminds me, I want to clean the freezer out this weekend and get it straightened out. It's gotten to where I have put everything on every shelf. You know what I'm talking about. I don't even know what is in there anymore. I need to do that, and defrost it while I'm doing it. Perhaps I'll do that this morning while hubby is gone. It will be done in a few hours. Yeah, sounds like a plan.
And with that - only a scripture about being lazy comes to mind - which I don't want to be today. I need to work on my list of things I want to get done - and get started on it. Three more hours until hubby is home - at least I can get the freezer started defrosting - and maybe, just maybe, I can get something else done. My thoughts are lining up - but need to do what I can actually get done and not pick big projects that will be interrupted and unfinished by end of day.
So what can you do today to be productive? I'm heading to the freezer to get that done. After I change clothes, that is! Have a productive day!
Blessings!
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