for it to soak in what it was actually saying. I received an 'unknown caller' call on Thursday and I let it go to voicemail. A few hours later I noticed the voicemail, and thinking it was another call for my blood, was only half listening when I realized it was Vivent, the alarm company we had at our other house. They were telling me my alarm was going off and they had dispatched police and fire to the location. I didn't listen closely, and did try to call them back at the number to tell them they had the wrong number... but there was no answer. Fast forward to last night... I remembered the call and thought I'd see which house it was and try to figure out how they got my telephone number. I google mapped it - and our house had been 3317... I didn't realize that 3311 was our neighbor's house next door - the one where Bonnie and John lived. Well, Bonnie died, but John was still living there. So I went back and listened again to the voicemail and it said the medical and panic button had been pushed. Did John have a heart attack? Did he fall? I have tried calling him numerous times now and he has not answered. Is he in the hospital? Is he dead? And, not being a relative, I have no way of finding out any information. So I have been praying for him. In fact, I woke up around midnight this morning with this on my mind and I have prayed all night, in between dozing, for John and my son's leg. I finally got up at 4:15AM so I would quit tossing and turning. My head was pounding so I have taken an Ibuprofen (yes, it hurt that much) and surprisingly, I haven't fallen back to sleep - yet. I plan to run by John's house after Needles of Hope today and see if the door is broken in to or what is going on. I will keep trying to call John with hopes that he will answer soon. And, if I get him, I'm going to get telephone numbers of his sons (who all live out of state) and who else should be called should something happen to him.
But what is confusing as well - why did he have my telephone number as a back-up on his alarm? We've seen him maybe twice in the over two years we have moved away. He knows I loved and cared about him; was that why? He did have other friends - why my number - and why without telling me he had done that? Was it a carryover from when Bonnie was alive? I had a key to the house then - but I turned it in when we moved. Praying I can find out something today for my heart is heavy for him.
Isn't this weird? I just google-mapped the address again to make sure I hadn't looked at the wrong house... look what has been done to the street number! I didn't see that on any other house number. I don't know when google took that photo... but isn't that strange? It's almost as if someone 'marked' the house? I definitely am going to drive by there today after Needles of Hope to check it out. So very strange.
My boss text'd me late yesterday afternoon to tell me that the retreat went very well, 'thank you, and well done'. He has no clue the stress I was under; afraid I had forgotten something. So glad it is over with and now life goes on. He has hired a new employee to start in a couple weeks, and procrastinator that I am... have put off ordering things for him until Monday. My plate has just been too full the past few days. Today will be busy, and tomorrow even more so with both preaching at the RV park and then driving to Mesa to do the Celebration of Life service. I will be ready to collapse by tomorrow night, I'm sure!
I'm hoping for a short getaway next weekend and have text'd my granddaughter if we could spend some time with them on Saturday. Found a hotel that wasn't over the top and I'll 'book it' as soon as I hear back from her. She will probably let me know today. I just need to get away from our same o same o days. I may even see about taking that Monday off - even though we'd be here at home again. I am just needing a break from routine, I think. Getting somewhat stir-crazy staying in the house all the time - although I did get out and go to the grocery store yesterday for a few things, and to get gas. AND I was alone. It felt good.
We watched War Room again last night - I love that movie and it always encourages me to stay focused on my prayers. It is so easy to just sit in my chair every morning, read my Bible, write in my journal, and type on here - and get up and get busy with my day. I need to also take the time to get on my knees (rather than just writing out my prayers) and actually do some talking to my Heavenly Father. I watch this movie and my mind starts going in circles trying to figure out 'where' I could have my own prayer closet. It is harder when one is married, I'm afraid. The only closet possible out of the three we have - is the front closet... which is full of coats and who knows what else.
It could be do-able... it's big enough, and I think it would work... but hubby has - no kidding - about 20 jackets/hoodies/coats to my 5-6 coats and where would he put those? I had no idea he had that many coats and jackets! I need to 'suggest' he go through them and choose some we can donate to a homeless shelter or something. I have a feeling though that he won't want to do it. Even if I could get him to get rid of half of them - he would not move the others out of that closet.... I don't think. He has more clothes than I do so his closet is full.
So then my thoughts have gone to the back room where I have all my exercise equipment that I rarely use. As long as we live here, we have to pay the yearly rec fee so why am I hanging on to these? It's convenient for sure, but not if I don't use them, right? I need to move my butt to the rec center and get in the habit of exercising there. If I get rid of these, I could put a couch or loveseat back there and make it into a 'prayer room' - don't you think? Not a lot of privacy as it is an open room, but yet, I think hubby would leave me alone - or he may even use it too. I'm going to have to think on that. Afterall, I am the one who would have to give up my treadmill, weights and weight bench, and trampoline. Am I ready to do that? Do I want to do that?
Philippians 4:19 (NKJV): "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."
God knows my desire is to have a place where I can spend alone time with Him. Yes, I have this room, but if we have guests, they get this room and I have to go to the couch, interrupting my space. And, I share this room also as my office. So we have a bed, an office, and a quiet space all in one room - and it's cluttered and distracting. So much to think about.
But the verse about tells me that God will supply all my need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus. That tells me He will help me with wisdom and revelation - to know what I am to do. I know we have way too much 'stuff'.... which means I need to get rid of some 'stuff'. Oh the agony of letting go!
You may laugh - but you have no idea my problem of letting go of things - even I don't understand why I hang on to things like I do. But every once in awhile, I do get the 'let go' mood and do let go of some things. I just don't get any encouragement or help from hubby.... he hangs on to things more than I do. Imagine that. I hang on to things a lot of times for sentimental reasons - a grandchild gave it to me, or a child, or my mother, or a brother or sister... or a close friend... but they are just things. If I'm not using them, I need to let them go, right? I'll think about it.
Ok - need to get my thoughts together for today and spend a little time working on this Celebration of Life until I need to leave my room and face the real world. Hope that you have a blessed day and trust God to supply all you need - whether it be healing (have you asked Him to heal you?), financial (did you ask if He would provide what you needed?), or success (did you pause to ask Him what direction does He want you to take to make you successful?)? Lean into Jesus - trust Him and ask Him for what your heart desires... let Him guide you in all things.
Blessings!
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