and some parts really touched my heart. Memories. Hopes. Dreams. Just remembering what it was I dreamed of... what I hoped for... what I desired...
One of our dear pastor friends got married for the first time yesterday. I wish now we had gone to the wedding, but it was up in Sedona and I needed to work and not use a vacation day. Our friend is in her 50's, I think, and is getting married for the first time. She looked beautiful. So did the groom, who is also a friend of ours. Both are from our former church. Tonight is their reception at the church so we plan to attend and give them our congratulations. So what touched me about their wedding?
From the start... she walked down the aisle alone (as her father is deceased) and she looked beautiful dressed in a flowing white wedding dress and veil. But she sang a song that I had to go online afterwords to hear all the words as zoom does not pull in everything, plus challenges they had with the internet there. Check out Maurette Brown Clark - The One He Kept For Me on You Tube. Pastor Sharon sang it to her beloved as she walked down the aisle.
There were other parts of the wedding that reminded me of my own hopes and dreams. Things spoken in vows such as integrity, love, dreams, respect, the future together. It was a beautiful wedding. Reminders of how naive I was ... and still am about some things. I want the dream. That's all I can say.
Do you ever struggle about holding on to things? I'm not talking so much about material things, for I did manage to purge a lot of things I was holding on to when we moved. In fact, the thought occured to me yesterday that I needed to go through things again and let them go. When I die, what will my kids do with all this 'stuff'? It isn't fair to them to have to clean it out.... if hubby would even let them, if I should go first. My books are what I hold on to the most, I think, and that's ok. We have bookcases. I love my books. I reread some of them often. Unfortunately, my children probably would not want any of my books, although they would be good for their soul. :-)
But I'm talking about holding on to emotions, to feelings. Today's devotional I have reread several times already this morning. I also finished reading Mark Batterson's 'Not Safe' book last night. These things almost tie in together. But the devotional is personal. And when it's personal, it speaks to me.
"You are a vessel of my sacred glory, a temple of my Holy Spirit. You were created to know the depths of my love and designed to interact with me, as my child, as my annointed one. But in order to experience the vastness of what you were created for, ou must let go of the hinderances. You must allow me to purify you.
The bellowing winds that try to suck you into a vortex of chaos are nothing but an illusion tryng to consume your thoughts. Troubles come and situations arise that need your attention, but you must not allow them to rule your thoughts. Invite me to cleanse you of everything that hinders you from being fully aware of my presence. Things like fear, anger, unholy thoughts, wrong motives - let none of these linger within you. Get rid of them! Give them to me once and for all. I am right here. If you cannot sense my presence, it's because you haven't fully yielded your thoughts to me. Simply offer me these things, then allow your spirit and mind to bask in thoughts of me."
Psalm 66:13 "I come before your presence with my sacrifice. I'll give you all that I've promised, everything I have."
How many times have I - have you - laid everything down .... then picked it back up as you go along the way? I know I have many times. I need to let them go once and for all. All the pain inside, all the struggles, all the burdens - these are the things that Jesus wants to take from us to help us live a life more fully in Him. Why do we want to hang on to them? They don't make us feel good; they create chaos in our lives; they create problems..... wouldn't it be easier to sacrifice them once and for all? I know, that's easier said than done sometimes.
I will give you a challenge today. Sit back in your chair and ask yourself what you are holding on to (that is probably making you miserable). Make the decision today to let that 'thing' go. I have some things to work on, and I'm sure you do too. Let's do this. Today.
Blessings!
