My calendar is going wacky!

 I went from one or two things on my calendar - to several things on my calendar - and I'm needing to weed things out and rearrange.  It really wouldn't be an issue so much if hubby isn't having his wisdom teeth pulled Thursday and will be on 'soft foods' for at least a week they say.  He is beginning to stress over it all - is there even enough soft foods to feed him?!!  Not a real question.  He's already asked that "should I go to Bible Study Friday morning?  If I do, what can I eat?"  And I told him that I thought he may be feeling ok enough to go, and as for eating, there is always scrambled eggs, or oatmeal.  Either way, he would have to be careful not to get anything in that empty socket.  

I remember after my surgery I wanted french fries! And hubby ignored me but stopped and got me a milkshake. I'm sure he will want his chocolate milk shake that he loves.  I don't remember what I ate specifically for the few days after the surgery.  Mashed potatoes and broccoli?  Drank protein shakes?  I honestly do not remember.  Food is food.  I just chewed on the opposite side of my mouth.  (Ain't no one going to tell me I can't eat food!!)  We have plenty of things - including protein shakes.  He isn't going to starve.  In fact, I remember, I did not even lose one pound after my surgery.  If he does, I'm going to be upset! But he's wanting me to play the 'mother' again and help him figure out how he is going to feel.  But I can't.  Each of us respond differently.  I'm confident, based on how I felt and how I came out of it - even though I don't remember much of it - that he will do just fine.  He just may need to bypass chewing of complex foods.  I think that scares him more than anything. LOL  Ok, I'm being sarcastic. We know that I love food.  And some know how much hubby loves food.  I don't live for food.  There is a difference.

So, his surgery is tomorrow morning, and he will sleep most of the day, I'm sure.  I'm only taking a few hours off in the morning and will be working the rest of the day.  He will have to decide about Friday morning, but I am assuming he will go.  But his surgery messes up - or makes uncertain - things for the weekend.  Our birthday grandson did text me yesterday and he 'guessed Saturday' would be a good day to meet up.  As I dealt with hubby and his fears, I text'd the grandson back and said I would let him know Saturday morning if we could meet up for lunch or dinner.   I also suggested we put it off another week so that hubby could enjoy being with him more.  He just said 'sounds good', I think.  I don't want anyone to feel they HAVE to go to dinner with us.  We just want to celebrate them.  If they don't want to - it's fine. But I will follow through once we have hubby figured out.  

My youngest son called, and we have postponed our 'Christmas celebration' until next weekend.  He has other things to do.  And, in reality, so did I.  I have Needles of Hope in the morning but was giving up part of that time as a great granddaughter is now in soccer and it is her first game.  Of course, Oma and Opa should be there - oh wait, Opa may not be, but I will be.  Maybe.  Will see how it plays out.  I may be sitting at home with hubby the rest of the day, depending on his mood.  Men respond differently to surgery than women do.  There, I said it.  And you know it is true.  (erase erase)  (no, it wasn't about hubby, but about people who complain they have so many issues (how is it they are still alive?) and yet are able to do so many things?)

2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV):  "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

Wow.  I think that says it all right there, doesn't it?  We aren't called to be afraid of life.  God has not given us the ability to be afraid of everything.   God is our Helper, our Nail in a Sure Place.  He does not give us fear to be afraid of things.  He gives us His power when we need it.  He gives us love to give to others. And He gives us a sound mind.  I think I need to leave that one alone, for many times I wonder about my own 'sound mind'.

God is good.  He is Light. He is Life. He is Everything.  We have no reason to fear things in life for He is our strength and our help.  I've told you many times that I cry out 'Lord, HELP!' when things are feeling out of focus for me.  And it doesn't matter what it is.  I can be angry with hubby and cry out 'LORD, HELP ME!!' and He does.  I can be driving and be confused as to where I'm going because I haven't been there before.... and cry out "LORD, HELP!" and He always gets me where I'm going.  And with work - well, you can be assured I cry out 'LORD HELP! frequently!!  Especially when I am overwhelmed.

The memory comes to mind of moving furniture - heavy furniture - all by myself while hubby was at a retreat years ago and even then, I was praying that God help me move the furniture.  And He did - and 'WE' moved the furniture.  When hubby came home, he was so sure I had called one of my boys over to help me.  He couldn't believe I moved it all 'by myself'.  But I assured him, I didn't.  God did the heavy lifting.  All I had to do was call out for His help - and He provided.  Actually, that is a special memory for me.  I should title it.... The Strength of God.... because it was by His strength that I was able to move a king size bed, triple dresser, two nightstands and a chest of drawers.... for trust me, even the nightstands are so heavy they are difficult to move.  

Today is a busy day at work; have things already on the agenda I need to complete.  I have my gym appointment at 5PM tonight - for an hour this time, to make up for a cancelled time last week.  I know my trainer is going to 'hurt me'.  He did enough in the 30 minutes last Monday!  Certain parts of my body are letting me know that I did something with them.  And on a couple of the machines he upped the weight 15 pounds!  He told me he did!  It was hard, but I pushed through.  You should have seen my biceps when I was done with that training!  I had biceps and I didn't even have to flex!  LOL   If only from the shoulders down would respond the way my biceps do.  Not grow, but shrink!

Refuel - or prayer meeting - is tonight and since the books for our new class should be arriving today, I will need to go and pass those out.  I'm really happy they chose to do the workbook, and I love this study.  I'm so looking forward to learning and growing more in Christ.  I need to find my Joy again, and I'm believing this will help.

And with that.... I need to get off here and get dressed and ready for the day.  Don't you just love all my ramblings?  Hope that your day is a....

Blessing!

An app on my phone....

 called Hello Heart tells me I need to 1) take my heart medication (which I don't need to take) and take my blood pressure reading.  My company sent any one who wanted one a blood pressure machine - I am sure I've mentioned this before.  I gave hubby the one I had bought years ago and rarely used. Mainly because I would forget.  But, with my brothers having heart issues, and my sisters having high blood pressure, I knew I needed to at least track what mine is.  I think - if I recall correctly - that I had even shared what my blood pressure was at that time.  Now I'm prideful, I admit it.  I like my blood pressure being 'down'.  And I will do all I can to make it so.  I actually take my blood pressure once or twice a week because I get these reminders every morning.  The reading also goes on the app on my phone, so that when I go to the doctor, I can show them what the readings are.  I got the machine for free - and the app is free - so I use it.  Occasionally.  I've learned some things too in taking it.  Breathe deeply a few times to calm the body down.  Make sure you go pee before taking it. (who would have thought having to go pee would cause the BP to go up??) and sit in the chair with your feet on the ground.  Ok then!  You are ready to have your blood pressure taken.  I put the cuff on, hit the button - and it's 115/81 and heart rate is 51 this morning.  Not bad, huh!  I think it was in the 140's/80 something when I shared before.   I refuse to allow my blood pressure to be out of 'my control'.  LOL  I exercise, I (try) to eat (mostly) right, and I love watching it be in the low numbers.  Of course hubby's blood pressure stays in the 110/70 range - and mine would too if I didn't work!

After the nice long 'weekend' it is back to work Monday.  I saw I have over 140 emails to go through.  Again, they are not all for me to do something; I get calendar things for about 6 people now - or more - so many of those I just delete.  But in glancing at the emails on my phone, I do have come I need to work on.  Sigh.  One is a contract to input.  I tell you what, Brett is driving me crazy.  This time he gives me a name and an email of someone at another company that we are to contract with - and I'm the one to contact them to get the information and the W-9 needed so that I can create the contract.  He doesn't pay me enough to do this stuff!  But it does not mean I need to complain.  I am learning something new.  And whenever I do get to retire.... whenever that may be.... they will miss me. :-)  I guess I wouldn't be so frustrated with him if he would have walked me through the contracts and explained everything.  They aren't hard to do at all and it only takes minutes to complete - when you have all the information.  I think I will create a form and fill it out when I need to do a contract so that I know I have the information BEFORE I start inputting the contract and have to quit.  On some, I can't save what I've inputted and each time I have to start over.  I still say 'it's not my job' but it does fall under 'other duties as assigned'.

Today is a grandson's birthday and I need to reach out to him to see about taking him out to dinner to celebrate.  I've thought about it several times this past week, but I haven't picked up the phone to make contact.  I will sometime today send that text and we can possibly meet up sometime over this next week.  It's hard to believe this little blond cutie has turned 18 - could that be right? Surely it is only 17!  I gave up a long time ago keeping track of the year the grandchildren were born.  I even forget their ages, but knowing this one is a senior (already!) causes me to know he is either 17 or 18.  I was 17 when I graduated high school.

We may be starting to have 'class' on Monday evenings now.  I had gotten a name last week of someone who wanted to take Discipleship, and I've mentioned here that I have gotten out of that notion and have been thinking about a workbook instead.  I sent an email to this person earlier in the week but have not heard from her, so I called yesterday.  She said she didn't get my email - so I verified the email address I had and she said it was correct.  I wonder if it went into spam or junk mail.  Anyway, I told her to come about 6:30PM tonight and I will have soup and salad (guess who needs to run to the store! - maybe instead of salad I'll pick up lunchmeat for sandwiches) for dinner and we can get acquainted.  She has a roommate she said she would ask to come too.  I was delighted when she told me who it was!  There is an elderly gentleman (ok, he's 78, I think) who greets us every Sunday we go to church, and we just love him to pieces.  He is her roommate.  She rents a room to him since her husband passed a few years ago and he also is single.  I hope he will come as well.  She hadn't told him she had 'signed him up' as well.  If both come, and we decide to do a class on Monday evenings, her name is Francisca and his is Ben, cause you know I will be writing about them!  I'm somewhat excited about starting a class, even with one or two people.  I think I'm more excited that I get to refresh my memory from when I taught the classes before.  I am really hoping they will go with a workbook, but if Discipleship, will do it since that is what I offered.

We didn't go to church yesterday, but we did watch our church service online.  We also watched Free Chapel together, although I had watched it already in here.  The worship pastor spoke and he said a couple things that I immediately knew was not correct - and I plan to send him an email this morning and ask him if what I heard - or thought I heard - was what he said - and give him proof from my Bible that he was wrong.  One thing was he talked about the 10 spies and said Caleb was not a Jew.  What?  I pulled my Bible out - and he was from the tribe of Judah.  Did I actually hear him say that?  I'm going to call him out as we are told to do if something is said that isn't in the Bible.  I am going to ask if I heard him correctly.  

As for the rest of the day, after 'church' I cooked bacon, eggs, and toast for breakfast - and then we took a nap.  Hubby watched NCIS on Ion for a show or two and then turned the TV off (yay).  I got to finish another book - am 15 towards a goal of 50.  I have a few others I'm reading so hope to add to it soon.  My son is an avid reader and he is already 25% of his goal of 200!  Working does create a challenge when it comes to pleasure reading.  I did fix a tuna casserole for dinner - haven't made it in - truly! - years.  Tuna casserole and a small salad.  Hubby didn't complain.  I cooked dinner.  It wasn't bad.  And there are enough leftovers that we can have the same thing for lunch today.  Soup tonight so I will be making - I'm thinking - taco soup and maybe the crockpot chicken chili.  Both are so simple to make that anyone can make them.  Doesn't take a lot of time.  And I have a 5PM gym appointment so have that tonight as well.  

I John 4:9 (NKJV):  "In this the love of God was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him."

Did you ever stop to think about how much God loves you?  God had one Son, and God chose to send His one Son to the world that He created.  And not only did God send His one and only Son, He sent this Son to live a sinless life, and then at age 33, be beaten, scourged, and crucified for you and for me.  God sent His one and only Son - to die.  For you.  For me.  Could you even imagine thinking of doing that to a son of your own?  Heck, we wouldn't even allow it to happen to any one!  But God chose His Son to be our sacrifice forever.  Good thing as I think cattle and sheep would be pretty scarce by now, don't you?  Could you even imagine all the blood everywhere from sheep and cattle being sacrificed.  Sin offerings, grain offerings, and many others.  Some of us would be standing in the line daily with a sin offering, I'm afraid.  

Grateful that Jesus came and was our sacrifice once and for all.   Once Jesus gave His life - willingly, I might add - as a sacrifice for our sins, no longer was it required to sacrifice a bull or cattle or sheep or pigeons or doves. Jesus paid the price for us.  For all time.

I read that Jesus was beaten so badly and scourged so painfully, that He could barely walk as He was so near death.  Remember, the Roman guards got Simon from Cyrene to carry the cross because Jesus was too weak and kept falling with that heavy thing on His shoulders.  I can see it in my mind now as I share the story.  They get to Golgotha and the cross is laid on the ground.  The guards turn to get Jesus and - instead of them dragging and forcing His body upon the cross..... they instead see Him crawling to lay His life down on the cross.  He lays His body down on that hard wood, and stretches out His arms to be nailed.  Why did He do that?  Why did He willingly crawl to the cross and put His body upon it?

Because if He had died before He got to the cross, His death would not have meant anything.  Jesus had to go to the cross; He had to be OUR sacrifice for all OUR sins, already done, and those sins we will do in the future.  He crawled to the cross to lay down His life because He was OUR sacrifice then....and He is our sacrifice now.  He willingly took the beatings, the scourging, the long road to the cross, and willingly laid His body upon the cross, so that you and I could have eternal life in heaven with Him and His Father.  He gave His all for us. Our eternal sacrifice.  

Thankful that we have a Father who loves us so much that He sent His only begotten Son to die for us, once and for all.  No other sacrifice needed.  Jesus' blood covers us. He took our sins.  Nailed them to the cross. And set us free.

In Jesus, we are free indeed.  And through Him, we live.

Blessings!