I didn't linger in bed as I have been doing lately, hoping to fall back to sleep. Admit it - 4AM is early to get up. But I got up about 3:50AM - after all, I had awakened at 11; at 12:10; at 2, and by the time I woke up again, decided to just get up. But since I want to read my Bible, spend some time with God talking with Him, (and/or writing in my journal), and writing in here, I need to keep moving. I've shortened my time in some areas so that I can write in here before I leave. Where am I going? I let Morgan give me a 7AM workout time - taking hubby's place since he can't work out for another week - and here I am. I will have to stop about 6AM so that I can get ready and then get out the door by 6:30AM. I'm only moving from my chair to my desk at 7AM! So my eye is on the clock as I type. And you know I put so much thought into these writings that it takes so much time..... just saying.
Yesterday was a good day. For one, I finally got a call back from the chiropractor's office. Ok, so I had only called on Monday, and it could have been a day off for the office. The doctor actually called me back, which makes me wonder if he has an office staff. Or maybe he only has one person and they are out. Whatever. Anyway, he called me yesterday and I am scheduled for next Monday to get started. He does take my insurance. So why am I going to a chiropractor? Because of my low back pain, mostly. It has started to fade in that the inflammation has started to heal from whatever I did to it, but with that severe headache hitting me the other night, I think I need my neck tweaked too. I'm always nervous when they pop the neck - yet I see people popping their necks on their own - and their backs! I'm afraid if I did it I'd be paralyzed! I still think that one of the massage therapists I had (and only used him once!) dug into my neck (because I frequently have tightness in my neck) and pulled on my skull - I honestly believe that what this did was start my ocular migraines. I feel that he has a nerve pinched in there somewhere. I'm hoping the chiropractor will be able to loosen up whatever is going on and I will be free of those migraines. They don't hurt, but I flashing lightening bolts distort my vision unexpectedly. Why also do I 'blame' the therapist that dug into my neck? Because the next day I lost my vision in my right eye - for about 3-5 minutes. Now this was probably 3-4 years ago and I've been dealing with ocular migraines ever since. I told my eye specialist about it, but he can find nothing wrong with my eyes. So I'm thinking it is some vessel in my neck.... ok - this may be far-fetched, but I would like the lightening bolts to go away!
I was alone last night and yet, I was productive. Hubby went to meet his friend. I worked about a half hour on the diamond art project I have going, then once hubby left, I decided I needed to finish pulling the message together for Sunday. So then my youngest calls and we talk. Then I knew I needed to call my little brother and check on him, so I called him and he said "I'll call you back" - so about 15 minutes later he did, and we talked. He's doing ok thus far. Had his 4th dose of radiation yesterday. Second dose of chemo will be Thursday. So far he's ok. Was told he'd start getting tired. Then he laughed. The night before he came home, laid on the couch to watch TV - and didn't even get through the credits before he was sound asleep. All I can do is pray for him, and that I do.
After talking to my younger brother I talked with my little sister. By this time I was about half way through what I ended up with for the message. The message is about listening. Are we listening for God? I talked with my little sister for awhile and then hubby got home. I finished up the first draft of the message and then hubby and I talked for quite a while. He actually left the TV off when he got home. Yeah - pet peeve of mine. I may watch a movie on occasion when he's gone, but I love the quiet and ask for it frequently.
A funny thing happened yesterday. Well, it made me laugh. One of the RV Park Church leaders called me yesterday (and hubby was sitting here talking to me while I was working), and said they were working on next season's schedule, and was I interested in continuing to come there and preach. I told him yes. We love the people there and after 12 years, have gotten to know several quite well. He really made me laugh when he asked if I would be interested in taking all 22 weeks. I told him that whatever they wanted me to do, I had nothing scheduled on the calendars that would prevent it at this time. He mentioned the other three pastors that speak - well, they are older than I and have medical issues - and they want to start slowing down. I need to see if I can find other pastors who are retired who would like to come speak there. I had about 10 this season, I think. I don't care where they assign me. And, yes, it is a lot of work to pull together a message, especially when it is two weeks in a row. Hubby made his comment once I hung up that he didn't think I should do it a lot because.. blah blah blah. I told him that it energizes me and keeps me digging in the Word and learning. It's like being bi-vocational - working a full time job and speaking on Sundays. Many pastors have had to do that. I have always been ok with it, but hubby never would allow me to be on staff somewhere if he wasn't also. Long story, not going into it. I just want to tell others about Jesus and His love for them, and share how to be His. It isn't about me speaking. I don't need to be 'up there' on stage. I just want to help people find Jesus and change their lives to follow Him. So I will continue to speak whenever they tell me. I feel God will let me know when 'enough is enough' and I'm done. But I'm hoping I can keep going for a few years yet.
Psalm 33:4-5 (NLT): For the word of the Lord holds true, and we can trust everything he does. He loves whatever is just and good; the unfailing love of the Lord fills the earth.
Oh the joys of loving Jesus! It doesn't mean one will have a perfect life, or that everything will go the way you want it to, but loving Jesus and Him holding you, well, there is nothing greater.
Have you ever been somewhere and suddenly you felt enclosed in someone's arms, and yet, no one was near you? Maybe your thoughts were of a loved one. Those arms could be Jesus' arms encircling you, to let you know that you are loved. Have you ever wondered how some people at funerals seem very calm and at peace? It isn't because they didn't love the one who passed, it is because they know where they have gone, (heaven, in case you are wondering), and they know that Jesus has encircled them in His loving arms to comfort them. After all, His Word says that He is near to the broken-hearted.
Have you ever had your heart broken? I have, many times. How did I get through those times when my heart was broken and distraught? By leaning into Jesus and allowing Him to comfort me, hold me, love me, and walk with me. I tell you the truth; without Jesus, I would not be where I am. And I leave it at that. I have always said that I love Jesus, and I want to obey Him, more than I want my own way. Life is not about me. Life is all about Jesus. That is the legacy I want to leave behind me. It's all about Jesus.
Blessings!
