Will be a busy day....

 hopefully I can still get done the things I need to, that I will keep my mind focused and working. What all do I have on my plate for today?  Well..... work, of course.  And then a 10a training with Morgan.  HIIT today.  Wonder what she will have me do.  I flipped the tire as one of the five exercises last time so don't expect it this time - possibly will be the sled. Hubby hates the sled, but I don't mind it so much.  After that I have the orthodontist at 1:30p.  

The liners have come in; I don't know what else to call them.  I'm already self-doubting myself if I should have just let it go and saved the money.  I have always disliked spending money on myself... and although I see where these are 'needed', is it just cosmetic?  Yes, I have pain, and will have more pain with the liners, but it will pull teeth back and give space where it is needed.  They think it can be done in less than two years.... dare I hope?  I should never have gone and then I would not be in this quandry.  Right?  But - I did go and I did order and I will get.    

And around 5-ish I will be meeting a co-worker whom I haven't seen since the company Christmas gathering for dinner at Cracker Barrel.  It's about the half-way mark for both of us.  At least time-wise, I guess.  I don't usually have 'so much' going on in the same day.... it feels weird to know that I have three things to do... and I'm finding I'm wanting to retract into my shell and not go to any of them!  But, I will.

Last night was a quiet evening... for awhile.  When hubby asked if he could watch the ballgame, I reluctantly said ok... and picked up my yarn to work on the project I'm doing.  Not that I was doing anything before; scrolling my phone (I hate it when I look at one thing and next thing I know an hour has passed!!) (or more!!)  I was in the process of putting down my phone to pick up a book.... so I did the next best thing.  I put an audible book on my kindle and sat and crochet'd.  Yes, I can occasionally multi-task!  I do like audible for I can 'read' a book by listening, and with the headset on, I can block out other distractions - plus I can crochet or knit and get a project done as well.

Our grandson in NM called yesterday and we had a nice chat.  Even did facetime.  I had looked at some photos they had posted of recent vacation and photos of the baby - who I think he said is about 16 months now... I had text'd and told them I wasn't going to comment on the photos but just wanted them to know I had looked at them.  He called and it was nice I 'had him to myself' for a little while as I was still back in the office.  I finally took my phone to the front room, where hubby was watching TV of course, and handed him the phone to chat for a bit.  I noticed, while standing next to hubby, something seemed 'off'.  Usually when this grandson calls he will sit up and is somewhat 'lively' in conversation.  This time, to me, he didn't seem to have much conversation... or maybe it was just me.  It was like I had awakened him (and could very well have) and he wasn't fully awake.  As I wrote this paragraph I just remembered that..... 

My sister-in-law called me yesterday too.  That was an interesting conversation.  We don't talk much, and hubby calls his brother more often, as he should.  But, interestingly enough, hubby has told me that he was told by his brother that the SIL can't drive because she's got dementia, and several other things going on.  According to the SIL, she still drives and meets friends for lunch, goes shopping - although at times others do drive (as they do me).... I don't know; she seemed pretty aware of things while we chatted. She was afraid she had forgotten my birthday.  No, she hadn't.  For the past 44 years she has mailed me a birthday card, and us an anniversary card every year.  She never forgets.  She is in her 80's so it would be understandable if she did.  She always sends, and always writes a short note.  Much better than me.... I quit cards a long time ago.  Pretty much, anyway.  If you get a birthday card from me that is purchased, you are special.  Just saying.

Sigh. Every morning now Sue is sending me a Teams message of good morning.... and adds.... 20 more days. Today may be 19 more days.  She is getting excited about retirement, and I don't blame her.  I'm getting that longing again, but don't see how we can do it.  I mean, I know we can make it, we just have to quit doing some things.  And I'm ok with that.  I truly believe that we have more than enough now, and that God will supply all that we need.  But what if... just what if... He has kept me healthy and strong so that I can continue to work?  See how the doubt comes in?  I wish I could get laid off, then it's not ME that is leaving work. LOL  I want someone else to take the 'blame'. Right?

I Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV) Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Yep.  I read that this morning, and even wrote it down, because I need the reminder that I am to rejoice in all things.  God will not allow things to happen to me unexpectedly.  He is well aware of all things, and in all things, He will strengthen and encourage me to keep on.  I do thank Him for my job.  So grateful He has always provided a job for me.  My jobs have always been fulfilling and I have made many friends over the years.  Hubby wouldn't keep a job, leaving for whatever reason he wanted, and then taking several months to find another.  Only to quit again.  And always for less money.  I never understood that.  So when people ask why I can't retire; don't we have a pension or money in the bank... they don't understand.... and I don't need to go into details.  Reminded of that because the grandson asked those questions yesterday.  Painful thoughts.

Anyway.... I can still rejoice, and I can still pray, and I can still give thanks in all circumstances.... because I know that whatever is going on in my life does not escape God's notice.  He sees me.  And He loves me. And He will walk me through anything that comes at me.  If I continue working, He will help me until the end.  His purposes are better than mine. His desires for me are greater than anything I can come up with.  Be patient, I tell myself.  God is still at work in me.

And He is still at work in you.  Never give up.  Keep seeking, keep praying, keep loving God.  He is for you, not against you.  No matter what the enemy throws at you, God is for you and He is with you through the journey, through the fire.  I know it.  He has walked with me through many, many trials and hardships.

At times my heart is breaking, He is my Comforter.  When I don't know where the next dollar comes from, He is my Provider.  When I need help, He Supports.  When I just need Him...... He is always there for me.

And He is there for you.  Always.  Seek Him and know Him.  You will find your peace and your joy.

Have an amazing day!

Blessings!

Going through the motions

 Some days it is like that, isn't it?  You just keep doing what you know you need to do - and just do it automatically.  That's about what yesterday's work was like.  I was busy all day - and still had work to do when I signed off.  My male boss had sent several meeting requests while I was off on Friday and I was having to get those done yesterday.  But, even in that busyness, I managed to get a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies made for Morgan.  I pulled together enough 'food stuff' that I knew would make her happy, sent hubby to pick up a Kohls gift card (he couldn't find one; said Walgreens didn't carry Kohls cards) and he brought back a Visa card for her.  With her baby due any time now, I wanted to be sure I got her Christmas gifts to her before she wasn't there.  She was disappointed, I think, for she mentioned she didn't get the pumpkin raisin cookies I made a few weeks back.  I had forgotten all about those - and that is what she had specifically asked for!  I'm going to try to make those today and when I go tomorrow for my workout, providing she is still 'there', will take her some.  At least I got her big bag of goodies to her.

Now I need to focus on Thursday - I will be driving to Mesa for the Network department party.  I will 'lose' nearly a full day of work, but since he is the one who gives me the majority of work, it's ok. LOL I bought a hotdog toaster for the white elephant gift.  Had no idea what else to bring.  It used to be - in my day - a white elephant gift was something that you had around the house that you didn't want anymore.  It didn't go with your decor.  Now people bring about anything. Last year someone actually brought a bottle of scotch!  I was shocked! Even more so when my male boss was the one who chose that 'white elephant' gift and opened it - and he's Mormon!  It got quickly taken by the next person.  The funniest one last year was that one guy had a sweatshirt made with my male boss' face on it.  The laziest one I think was the batch of dish towels and pot holders someone wrapped up.  I took remote candles that many people like - but the woman who chose that gift didn't seem to care for them.  Interesting.  Last year I got the Victorian Swiss knife to use in the kitchen.  I will have to see what my friend brings this year.  Year before last I got the cast iron 9x13 pan.  Love it.

I haven't really cooked in about two weeks - not meals, anyway.  I do have hamburger in the refrigerator so maybe I'll throw together a meatloaf - oh wait - this is Tuesday night and hubby has his bible study and he eats at IHOP.  After dropping him off I will go on to the hospital to visit my daughter.  Yes, she is still there, but has been moved to another room now.  They are searching for a rehab center that will take her insurance, unless she can roll over to AHCCCS, which would be very helpful for her and she could cancel the insurance she has - it is outrageous because of her leukemia and needing prolia shots (which are about $750 without insurance, I think).  Anyway, she will be moved soon to a rehab center.  She's like to go to where my DIL works, but doubt if they take her insurance.  If she can get on AHCCCS it would be easier to place her.  Maybe I'll make chili with the hamburger... or put in the freezer for another time.

I got to visit my daughter last night after my workout.  I was very surprised hubby did not (he really wouldn't dare, I think!) try to convince me to go during the day - instead of after it was dark.  But I'm a big girl now and I did go to the hospital alone and I did stay for about an hour before heading back home so that she could get a nap before her hubby came to stay overnight with her.  Her pain is much more manageable now, and she is able to move one leg.  She's working on trying to get the other to move.  I asked specifically about the break - fracture - or what it was. She said it was a fracture that splintered a bit.  Which is probably why it is more painful than some?  I'm not 'that type' of medical person; I lean on my DIL for that information!  Or my boss, Sue, or my doctor friends.  In fact, this Saturday I am having brunch with my boss, Sue, and my favorite doctor. (which is another bag I need to get put together).  And a former CFO is coming too.  We try to meet up a couple times a year.  I sit and listen a lot.  They love me, and I love them, but their talks about travels to foreign countries and other things are usually things that I haven't done.  I love to listen, though. They always ask about me and my family.  Boy, do I have a lot to fill them in on this year! LOL

Philippians 4:6-7 (NIV):  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

This verse has always meant a lot to me and has rescued me from the pits of despair many, many times.  Through it, I have learned not to get 'anxious' about things when they don't go the way I think they should.  When health issues in my children are things I cannot 'fix', when all I know to do is cry out to God for relief, for healing, for supplications.  My God, Our God, is more than able to hear our prayers and requests.  And He will answer.  We may not always like the answer He gives us, but I know that He hears us when we cry out to Him.

Sometimes things are allowed to happy because God wants our attention.  He wants you and I to talk with Him.  He wants us to ask Him for things.  He isn't a 'take for granted' God.  He isn't Santa Claus, ready and willing to hand you whatever you put on your list.  

Our God is Faithful and True, and He created you in His image.  He knit every bone, every cell, every organ within your body.  And He can heal what has been broken.  Many times I feel we depend on others to pray - and think that will do it.  And sometimes, it may.  But we are also to pray for ourselves. We are to surrender ourselves to the Lordship of Christ - although He often doesn't 'require' that of us.  He wants us to come to Him freely, without holding hands out, but He also fills those hands when we do come to Him.  Keep praying for a 'yes' answer... and rejoice that we have One who is willing and able to take what our problem is and bring good from it.

For example, hubby has not been giving me a lot of grief about driving.  Yes, I have to let him drive to the gym as he goes during the day and does not like going in the early morning or evenings like I have to do.  Still working that schedule out in my mind how we can do that.  He did ask me Sunday morning if I wanted him to drive to the RV park so that I could review my notes for the message.  I told him 'no' - I had already gone over the message a few times and God can deliver it the way He wants to.  He didn't resist me.  I drove him last Tuesday to his Bible study, and I will this week as well.  It works out that their Tuesday nights will be stopped after tonight until after the holidays.   Friday mornings is another issue, but he did drive last week as I went to Mesa.  I just realized he drove to Walgreens yesterday for the gift card.  Hadn't thought about it as I'm so used to him driving.  He offered to go get the gift card - and I wanted him to get two.  One for Morgan from Kohls, and one for his brother and SIL - but he didn't want to buy both, just the one.  So he got Morgan a Visa card.  Did you know they are now charging $8.95 to activate the Visa card?  Don't do that!  Buy Amazon cards! There is no extra charge!  Ridiculous!  Or buy a restaurant card!  Geez $8.95 to activate a VISA card.  Nope, I'm done with VISA cards.  They screwed me out of a gift card because the barcode was only half on the card - it didn't get activated because of it, and whoever gave it to me paid for it.  I fought with Vanilla Visa for several months and they would not relent.  I didn't know the $ amount on the card (assumed it was $25), but because the bar code was only half on - they wouldn't honor it.  So - word to the wise - if you are giving Visa gift cards - make sure you put the activation paper ON the card so it can be proved you were charged and it was activated - and make sure the bar code is complete.  

Anyway - I see my mind is going all over the place again this morning.  Still no gifts wrapped the past few days.  Work is busy; I need to bake; and I need to wrap.  Lord, help me sort this out!  I may need to take another day off just to catch up on things.  But first, I have at least 4 gifts to pull together by Saturday of baked goods.  Definitely need to bake today or tomorrow for that.  And you know what? I know I'll get it all done, and although I may not be satisfied with all I give to others, I know that they will be happy with whatever I give them.  

And, I need to get off here and get my work computer turned on.  Waiting to read what my son will write in his blog today, to update me on what is going on with him. I knew he had a specialist appointment yesterday, and my DIL did update me, but I didn't want to bother him when I am sure he is processing whatever he was told.  It wasn't that I didn't care, I do, more than he knows.  But I want to give him space to process.  Plus he has his life too, and it doesn't revolve around me.  Plus it was his wife's birthday and I hope he honored her yesterday.  I need to run her birthday package up to her today since she took yesterday off.  Guess I need to get dressed to do that too.

So with that - I'm off here.  Hope you have a good day today.  Be thankful, even in the difficult stuff.  Praise God, and thank Him for whatever you are going through.  Some things happen for a reason - and if that only reason is to draw near to Him, so be it.  Praise God in the struggles.  Only in Him do we have Hope.

Blessings!

I did it - and have no regrets

 Yesterday was a busy day for me.  I didn't even accomplish all that I had planned and wanted to.  But I did get the 'most important' that affects me, completed.

I went to Needles of Hope and was there the full three hours.  From there, because I had time, and because it was next door, I went to Ross and did a little shopping, keeping an eye on the clock.  I knew I had at least 30 minutes to 'waste' before I needed to head over to see my friend Joe.  I bought wrapping paper, a blouse, and a few other things, so I did get a variety.  Finally, it was time to head over to see Joe - and this part is funny.

I get there about 10 minutes before my appointment.  I sit down on the bench with the others. I didn't see Joe (12:50PM) so figured he was still at lunch.  He usually has me come back a few minutes early.  I pulled out my phone and started going through it, glancing up occasionally.  At one time I thought I saw him at his station, and then he was gone.  I waited.  1PM.  1:02PM.  I'm glancing around the station as I know he is always prompt.  I see a man sitting off in one of the chairs with the hair dryers.  I look, and because he was at a distance, and I haven't seen him for a few months, I kept staring, asking myself, "Is that Joe? Why is he just sitting there, looking at the door?"  Finally, I get up and start walking that way - and as soon as 'this man' saw me, he had the funniest look on his face of surprise!  

It seems he saw me as he glanced at who was there, and knowing that I am always early, he was watching for me.... but because of my brown hair (he hasn't seen me in brown hair for a long while!) and it was up in a ponytail, he didn't recognize me until I stood up and walked his way.  We both had a good laugh about it.  

I showed him a couple of my former 'short hair, yet not short' photos of the past (which he had cut and styled for me back then), and we talked about what I wanted, and the reason why I was doing it.  Joe is a Christian, so he and I often talk about the Bible and about life.  He washed my hair, and then combed it out.  And I closed my eyes.  I told him I needed a 'bridge' to the shorter hair, so don't go too short, but just above the shoulders.  He did it perfectly, and just what I wanted.  It will also help the thin spots start growing.  He fixed my bangs.

He did remember telling me not to cut bangs, because I have that wonderful cowlick in front that won't let them stay together.  But he said he did not remember telling me not to dye my hair (I told him that story too) - and we agreed that it was probably because of the upkeep, which can get expensive.  I did ask him about highlighting my hair now that it was dark - and he said he could - so we have scheduled another appointment on the 18th for me to go back and he will highlight my hair.

Pretty soon, no one will be able to recognize me, right?

From there I was going to see Ms. Diane, but it was close to 2:30PM and we had a birthday party at 4PM, so I called Ms. Diane and told her I would come see her today. It worked out as she said she was heading into more rehab.  They have already gotten her walking 149-150 feet at one time so I guess 3 hours of therapy a day is good for her.  I headed on home.

Hubby was in the bathroom when I came in so I headed into mine to make sure my hair was 'fixed'.  I came out to ask him a question and he looked at me and got a strange look on his face and said "You went to see Joe, didn't you?!"  I confirmed.  Of course he loves it.  

We finished getting ready for the party and headed over to Peter Piper - which was a mess.  Several tables had been reserved for birthday parties and although they were sitting empty because they weren't needed for a couple hours, they refused to let us sit down at them.  We finally left and went to my son's house and he ordered pizzas to be delivered from Pizza Hut.  It was chaotic but we were able to fit everyone (about 15 people) in the kitchen/front room area.  We had pizza and wings (PH wings are not good, in my opinion; no flavor) and fellowship.  Great-grandson opened his gifts, we had ice cream cake (yes, I indulged) and chatted.  It was going on 7PM before we got back home.   It was definitely a full day for me.  But a good day.

Today we are going to church and it is a celebration of 8 years as a church.  We were also told to wear a team jersey.  I asked my son to borrow one of his Viking jerseys, which he was happy to do so.  Hubby was trying to get me to wear one of his Cardinal shirts this morning, and when I declined, he called me a 'home team traitor'.  Little does he know, when the Cardinals plan the Washington (Redskins-do you think they will go back to that?), Vikings, or Raiders (all the teams my children cheer on), I cheer for their teams. Does that make me a bad person?  I think not.  I cheer on who I want to cheer on.  For years my team has been the 49ers - because that was the year I was born, but after Steve Young left, I lost interest. Joe Montana was my favorite quarterback, though.  So I will wear a Vikings jersey and hubby will wear a Cardinal jersey.

I know they plan a BBQ and other things, but we go to the 9AM service so don't know what they have planned for that.  Surely not the BBQ.  I know there will be coffee and pastries; there always is.

Sigh. And hubby has come in and interrupted me so I'm getting off here.  He doesn't usually get ready for another 30 minutes - why is he in here now?  I need to get ready anyway so I'm getting off here and start making myself beautiful.  At least I don't have to work on my hair as much as I used to. That is a big plus. :-)

And the month continues on.  Have an amazing Sunday!

Blessings!

Made it through the meeting

 Yes I generally get some anxiety - more so this month - about the board meeting that was yesterday.  It was moreso this month, as you know, because my boss 'dumped' on me to create the deck and several other little details.  The meeting was yesterday afternoon and it went very well - in fact, it was over 30 minutes early!  It really seemed it went very fast and some of the slides were entirely skipped over.  What's up with that?  But, I have no control over that - and that's ok.  I don't want it.  It would be more organized if I did it.  Yeah, right, huh!  So until the end of April I won't be bellyaching about the board meeting - our next one is in May and in April I will need to 'set up the deck' again.  But at least this time I will know how to do it and what I am doing.  I hope.

Today will be a personal busy day.  I have an 8:30AM with the chiropractor; 12:45PM with LabCorp for a blood draw; and 4:30PM I have another half hour of training.  Legs tonight.  Oh joy.  Last night we did upper back.  Monday it was core.  It's all good for me, and I'm grateful, for as long as I can keep my body strong, I can walk on my own, right?  Strengthening my core will keep me from falling as I age.  Working my legs ensures I can walk; and working my arms and upper body - I can carry my own groceries in, right? LOL  I thought about just taking the day off so that I won't have to deal with work - and I still could - but why waste a day of play when I can just take off and do what I need to do?  There are times I work through lunch, and times I start early, and times I work late.  They get their money's worth out of me and my boss knows it - and she doesn't care if I need to take off.  I'm always where I need to be when I'm needed.  And I always let her know when I'll be away for a bit.  Which is really rare, overall.

I slept good last night - first time in a few nights that I felt like I slept deep.  Woke up at 11:30PM cause I drank a lot of water last night after working out.  Fell right back to sleep - and what wakes me up this morning?  At 3AM my Apple watch is going off telling me that the battery is down to 8%.  I tried to go back to sleep and probably did some, but not as deep, until 4AM when I got up.  Really wanted to go back to sleep in here, and I think if I hadn't had my watch go off at 3AM I could have slept much later.  No dreams, just a deep sleep.  Or so I think.  That's what I don't like about the Apple watch.  It has to be charged every single day.  And if it is used by a program, i.e., I turn on the exercise app when I work out so that I can get credit on my company website, where my watch is hooked in to, for the exercise - and to watch my heart rate to see how high it goes.  My resting heart rate is about 57-59.  Daily activities I would guess it goes up to 70; haven't really checked.  But when Morgan is working me out - whether it is core or other exercises, my heart rate can go from 105 up to 125.  Seems like at one time she had it up to 130.  I think that was pushing the big sled back and forth - it is hard!  Even hubby doesn't like that one.  But we do it 'because Morgan says so'.   I really do feel that I am gaining some of my life back, for I 'feel' like doing things more with working out.  I don't just sit all day in front of the computer, and sit all evening on the couch.  Well, I do, but I'm also up and doing things.  And that's a good thing for me - mentally and physically.  

Started going through receipts yesterday to sort out for taxes.  We have an appointment in March with the financial guru so need to get everything pulled together.  And every year I tell myself I will keep better records, write things down, keep all in one place..... and like you, I'm sure.... every year that thought falls by the wayside and come February I am digging through stacks of receipts and then going through my bank records to see what medical and other bills I paid that I can claim.  And don't forget the mileage to and from the drugstore and the doctor/specialists offices - that can be claimed too.  And, we figure how much money I made from preaching (yes, they do pay me to do that!!) and I claim the mileage for that as well.  It all goes in specific fields and we total it up.  I love that we pull everything together and complete the form our financial guru sends us, and then when we go see him, all he needs to do is key in the totals in the computer, verify a few things, and poof!  Fifteen minutes later the form is completed, we have signed electronically, and he sends it off for us.  Except when we have to pay.  That's one reason we are glad Trump got elected.  It won't be until next year - but no taxes on social security.  That is the reason we always have to pay taxes - although we have already been taxed on our social security when we paid in to it, and when we receive it back, we have to pay tax on it again.  Just not right.  I've also started drawing my 401K and although I have paid the federal tax on it before I get it, I'm sure I will have to pay the state tax on it.  Better now while I'm working than when I'm not.  Taxes - we all have to pay them, and they are such a pain to pull together and deal with!  

Ecclesiastes 5:10 (NLT):  Those who love money will never have enough.  How meaningless to think that wealth brings true happiness!

Hebrews 13:5 (NLT):  Don't love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said: "I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.

Yes, I know some people who love money and like to throw it away like they have plenty.  I know others who are such penny pinchers that although they have a lot of money, they choose wisely on what they purchase and on what they give away.  I can't really call them penny pinchers.  Those are really selfish people, and the couple I am thinking of are definitely NOT selfish.  They have money, yes, but they give as they choose.  They hear of a family member in need, and they give of themselves and of their finances.  But, unlike some of us, they don't fall for the whiney bunch who blow their money and then expect you to help them out.    Does that make sense?  I've learned over the years to spend way too freely, and to save, as well.  We don't have much, but we get by.  And if someone is in need, and I know it isn't their fault, I like to help them out without them asking.  Sometimes it is providing a meal.  Sometimes it is providing my time.  Sometimes it is just a gift card.  Most times those people just need to know they matter, even though going through a difficult time.  

I know we have been on the receiving end a few times.  Times that have been so hard that I have cried out to God (literally!) because I didn't know what to do. Yes, it was our fault we got in that predicament (hubby quitting or losing a job; credit cards run up (don't get me going on that one!!) and just needing enough to pay the bills).  I remember my oldest brother one time send me a check for $25.  That's it.  Just $25.  Although I hadn't said anything to him, he said he knew we were going through a rough time and just wanted to help a little.  Another time a dear friend, as we were walking out of church, slipped a $50 bill into hubby's hand and didn't explain as to why, but just told us to pass it on.  And we have, many times since then.  Friends help friends; family helps family.  It is what is ingrained in us.  I think most of us want to help others, but we want to be sure they won't 'do it again' and get themselves in that predicament or that it is really needed.  Some people know how to play the system and they get help through other means, but then still complain they don't have to keep the sympathy going.  Unfortunately, many people now fall in that scope.  Don't you think?

I saw a post on facebook a week or so ago of someone that I don't know, posting through a church post, that they were willing to do anything to earn money.  They would clean, babysit, run errands, pull weeds - anything.  I get why they were doing it, they obviously needed money.  But for some reason I didn't feel compelled to help.  Ever feel that way?  It's not that I love money and want to hoard it. But something just didn't grab my heart about the request.  A couple days later I noticed someone asked them if they had gotten any response.  They replied "no".  I still didn't feel compelled to help.  So I didn't.  Trust me, God sometimes has me do more than I really think/want to do when he lays it on my heart to help someone.  Ironically, the last time I helped someone in the previous church who had surgery and needed help with meals, etc., I was the only one.  Why is that?   Have we all become so self-centered that we focus on what our needs are only?  

I know, I'm thinking too much this morning, right?  We have to be careful we are not enabling people (and I do enable one, I am aware of that) to live life like they have money and things and then supply what they 'need' because of their spending.  I'm learning to step back and not offer.  And when asked, I have to weigh the reason why.  You know when the bills are due.  You know what needs to be paid.  Don't go shopping for things when you know the money won't be there to cover it all.  Right?  

Ah, my mind is rambling all over the place this morning, isn't it?  Results of getting a decent night's sleep?  I don't know, but sometimes what I write is also a reminder to myself to watch my own business, if you know what I mean.  So how are you doing with that?  I will still give whatever I can as God directs me.  My money is His money, and He can do with it whatever He pleases.  He will always supply what we NEED.  Not necessarily what we WANT.  There is a big difference.  We have way more than we need in material things, trust me.  

I can remember frying up pork steaks or lamb chops for dinner because they were very cheap at that time.  I remember making my own bread because I couldn't buy bread.  I remember using a washboard to wash clothes and hanging out on a line outdoors, because we did not have money to have a washer and dryer and even then, laundromats were too expensive.  I remember it being so cold in one house that I opened the refrigerator and inside the refrigerator was warmer than the kitchen on the outside of it.  But God always provided for our needs.  And we were happy and content.  Or so I thought. 

Until you go through the tough times, you don't realize how much that God does love you and provides for you and those you love.  I would rather sit with someone and have a peanut butter sandwich, just to be with them, than not being with them because they feel they can't afford to feed us steak.  Steak isn't what it is made out to be anyway.  I fixed a t-bone steak last night and it wasn't that good.  Even grilled it, and it was dry and chewy.  Even what is known as a good steak can be 'boring'.  Right?

And with that rambling, I'm going to jump off here and get in the shower.  Have a busy day ahead and hope that some of this rambling speaks to you.  Love Jesus. Love Others, Love Yourself.  That is where you find JOY.

Blessings!

Getting it done....

 Going to be a busy morning today as we need to do a drive up north for church this morning.  Yeah, I'm speaking at the RV Park this morning so hubby is saying we need to leave by 8AM due to construction going on up there and we don't know what traffic will be like.  There's snow up north and you would be surprised at the number of people who go up north to play in the snow.  Then again, the Renaissance Festival going on right now and I know my daughter and some of her family are going to it today.  I never have been, although I hear it is a fun place to go.

 I heard a song recently that I love - actually, there are two of them.  Interestingly one has part of the other song in it.  The first one is Access by Calvin Newell.  The other is Holy Forever by Chris Tomlin.  I encourage you to listen to both - they are so good.  Both songs touch my heart in many ways.  I can sit and listen to them and just feel so full of worship.   So you don't worship?  I get that - but still, would you listen to these songs?

Due to the time change, Jentezen Franklin is on at 6AM and 8AM.  I'm listening as I type this - then I need to go jump into the shower and start getting ready.  That's the tough part about speaking at RV parks - church starts at 9AM.  Although, we did enjoy our church starting at 9AM when it did, for we were standing at the restaurant doors at 11AM when they opened.  LOL  Now at noon they are already full in most cases.

Hubby enjoyed the attention he got at the nail place yesterday.  He left it up to me on what level of pedicure he got...and trust me, after looking at his toenails, he got the deluxe. Yeah, they were that ugly.  LOL  He loved the special attention.  They worked a long time on his feet, and his fingernails.  He was happy.  Me - I just got the acrylic nails put on (and I'm having difficulty typing with them this morning; I'm not used to them.  I was going to get a coral sparkle polish, but ended up with just the French Tip.  You needed to know that, right?  Thoughts for his birthday or Christmas?  Gift cards to put towards his future pedicures.  LOL  

Psalm 23:1-3 (NKJV):  The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.  He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake.

I don't know about you, but I love having someone lead me to where I need to go.  I get confused easily (even more so as I have aged) and I love that I don't need to worry where I am going because my Shepherd will lead me wherever I need to go.  When I push too hard and get myself worn out, He will cause me to lie down and rest.  When I feel weary and worn, He pours into me His spirit and restores what the enemy takes away from me in the busyness of my life.   Sometimes I get too busy and too distracted by life.  I allow the craziness of this world to disturb my peace.  But I know I can run to my Shepherd, who will cover me, will embrace me, will give me relief and rest.  And all I need to do is run to Him.  And that's all you need to do.  Sit back, take a deep breath, and allow God to give you the rest you so deeply desire.  You will never be the same.  Too busy to take a moment for yourself to be refreshed?  Then you are too busy.  You can't keep going at that pace.  Sit back, right now as you read this, and take a deep breath.  Inhale.  Exhale.  Do it again.  Inhale. Exhale.  Turn your thoughts to the One who loves you and cares for you more than you could ever imagine.  Feel the difference?  Inhale. Exhale.

Once home from church this morning I need to work on the message for next week, which is my last one for this season.  Every summer I think I'll do messages and get them ready so I won't be working on them the week before.... but I always put it off, and never get it done.  But I also get my Sunday nap in and then I really do want to do some baking today.  I'm really wanting to bake cookies, but I know I will eat them.  And I need to go visit Ms. Diane and Ms. Vicky - yipes - it's been nearly 6 weeks I think, since I've visited.  Can I spare two hours today to do that?  Probably won't get baking done if I do. Which could be a good thing cause I'm craving cookies and if I bake them, I'll eat them.  

I thought about this the other day.... I told my kids to keep the plates I gave each one with cookies on it last year for Christmas.  I'm thinking I ought to take them back so that I could start a new tradition of baking something for them each Christmas and give to them.  What do you think?  Should I get the plates back?  All three kids have them.  LOL  I know my oldest son reads this blog.... the others don't.  Will see who gets cookies.  HAH!

Ok - I need to get off here and in the shower.  Hope that you have a blessed day!

Blessings!

Chaotic and Busy

 That is exactly how my day went yesterday.  I was busy from the get-go with scheduling meetings and then taking the monitor to 'that person' and then the board meeting.... and add in numerous texts and phone calls - and even a bundt cake delivery from my one boss - and a granddaughter/great-granddaughter visit late afternoon........ dinner after work and the youngest 'doing this thing'... sigh.... I slept good last night because I was just exhausted from the day.  Surely it isn't old age!!  And then as I signed off the work computer I noticed an email of someone I had forgotten to include in the board meeting.  Ooops. 

And then we have today..... it will be busy as I will need to finish up everything before going on vacation tomorrow.  I am actually getting excited about getting away and not working for a few days.  I'm just mentally stressed out and exhausted, I think.  I definitely need a break.  And after this next week - I have a few days off in September for Jailbreak Getaway.  

But the day yesterday did start off good in that my meeting with my boss on the mid-year reviews - she once again gave me 'exceeds expectations' and that I qualify for a lateral move.... although we both know I don't want to move to another position.... I want to stay right where I am.  I'm too (lazy) old to learn new things.  Naw, it's just I just plain don't want to learn new things.

I did my workout this morning but my trainer was somewhat distracted with his own personal things going on... which was disappointing as it was to be about me that half hour.  But I did get a good workout in - albeit that we did the same exercises I did on Tuesday.  And I told him so.  But he had created a new sheet to record my things on and thought he had reversed what we did before.  So we both get a week 'off' the 30 minutes of exercise and I don't see him again until a week from Tuesday.   Hubby went with me today and walked the treadmill and rode the bike while I did my workout.

I love that my granddaughters love to create things as I get to be the recipient of them!  Well, sometimes.  I got a really nice bag from my granddaughter yesterday that she knitted and sewed together.  Hubby thinks I should use it as a cosmetic bag - but it would get all snagged if I did... and I don't wear cosmetics that much to where I use a bag... but she said she was thinking of my crochet hooks - and I think that is what I will use it for.  Besides, when I carry my tote bag that she made for me, I can show it off when I take it out to pull out a hook.  After all... I am a 'hooker'.  tee hee.  You've seen the funny things on facebook where people say  "my husband tells me I'm old because I 'crochet'... saying it in a really old voice... so I looked it up and crochet means 'to hook', so I'm a 'hooker'.  LOL Cracks me up every time.

Psalm 46:1 (NKJV): "..... God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."

It's always good to have that reminder that whenever we are struggling and trying to push through on things, that if we give it to God, surrender that issue or trouble to Him, He truly is our refuge and our strength.  He will always help, if we only surrender it and ask Him.   Today is going to be one of those days that I do ask for His help  I have so much to get done today.  I'm sure you do as well - why not take a moment and just ask Him to help you through today.  To give you clarity of mind and give you the strength to accomplish any task that comes before you.  He will, you know.

7 minutes to signing on for work so guess I need to get off and get moving today.  Hubby is already panicking that he needs to pack today.  He is still doing his Bible study in the morning (yay!!  I get free time!!)  and will only have a few hours before we leave... so I look at him and say "you can pack tomorrow - it's not a big deal."  I don't plan to pack until tomorrow.... and I have errands to run in the morning too!  He is such a stresser that he stresses me! LOL

Hope that you have a blessed day - I gotta get busy!

Blessings!

An earlier road trip than expected...

 I mentioned yesterday that I'll be doing a road trip to Mesa today.  I hadn't planned to get there until about 10:30 or so as I was only responsible for lunch and it wasn't to arrive until 11-11:30AM.  Well, about 7PM last night my male boss text'd me and 'sorry for bothering you..... but....' .  He didn't get all the things he needed for his meeting, so could I do a run to Staples on my way down and bring them.  Oh, and he didn't get the case of water either for those attending.  Oh sure, I replied... I can do that!  I now have to revise my schedule somewhat as people will be arriving between 9:30 and 10 for this meeting and I need to have the supplies he needs there.  Plus, I need to stop and pick up the cookies for dessert after lunch.  Thank goodness I didn't make arrangements to pick it up - but am instead having it delivered.   Oh yeah, I need to pick up snacks too, I'm sure.  Maybe I'll do a run to Sam's club this morning and get the water and cookies and snacks... then hopefully Staples will be open.  Google said they open at 8AM but hubby 'asked' Siri and she said 10AM.  So I'll stop here and if they open at 8AM and I'm good.  If they open at 10AM, I'll head down to Mesa and find where Staples is there - and he will just have to wait to use what he wants. Hopefully Staples won't be too far away.

So anyway, I will be getting on my work computer a little early today; it's 'timecard Monday' too and I need to do that before I head down.  I'm taking my work computer with me but want to make sure I don't forget to approve the timecards.  Need to take a shower yet; figure out what to wear down. Yes, I can wear jeans, but I feel better if I dress up some with this group of people.

Heard a tornado hit Greenwood last night and I checked in with relatives - and they are all ok.  We have friends who live in Franklin and I sent them a text but have not heard back.  Sure hope they got through it as well.  Not sure how close Franklin is to Greenwood.

Yesterday was a lazy quiet day after lunch.  I heard Michaels had yarn on sale, but talked myself out of going.  I have yarn here to keep me busy for some time.  And I have no specific projects in mind.  Why buy more?  Even if it is on sale, I'd spend money now I don't need to.  I really do need to learn how to make more things and do different stitches.  I think I get bored with the two stitches I know how to do. But I know them and they can be done mindlessly most days.  I did start a knitting project (among the two-three I started some time ago.... will see how long before I put it away with the others.  Anyway, we came home and we both took naps; then watched 4 hours continuously of NCIS.  Surprisingly, I didn't recall these we saw.  But then, I wasn't the one who always watched them. 

Leviticus 19:18 (NKJV):  "You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself; I am the Lord."

It is interesting that I read that scripture today.  I have a grandson heading north for a court date that may very well determine his future.  Charges, I believe with all my heart, are false.  I have prayed and prayed, and have felt peace about it... but yesterday I began to have that fear start to gnaw at me at the 'what if' the judge doesn't believe the truth; that it doesn't get thrown out.  So once again I have had to run to God with that and ask Him to bring justice.  The devil likes to keep us in turmoil.  I've had peace for a few weeks about it, but now that the court is today.... I'm feeling anxious.   Then I remember the scripture that is one of my favorites....

Philippians 4:6-7 (NKJV):  "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be known to God; and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."

"So I throw up my hands, and praise You again and again! All that I have is a Hallelujah, Hallelujah! And I know it's not much, but I've nothing else fit for a King, except for a heart singing Hallelujah, Hallelujah!"

Words to this song just popped in my mind.  I know I need not be anxious about this.... I have no control over what will - or won't happen.  I have prayed about it; I have put it in God's hands.  He will bring good out of the bad, but it is in His timing alone.  He can defeat the enemy easily.  But what lessons do I - or anyone eles - need to learn from this?  My job is to pray and lean into God with my request.  It is His job to answer (or not) however He chooses.   Sometimes that is hard, as you know.  Even for me.  But I am glad I have my Heavenly Father to run to with my requests and cry out to Him for situations.  He is our only Hope.  Mine - and yours.

Glory to God - no matter what.

Blessings!

Crazy busy today - what's up with that?

 Yesterday I did a road trip down to Mesa and picked up a basket full of goodies that I had won.  Then I met a friend for lunch.  Had to make a run back to the office (not far away) to check out a couple conference rooms, then made the trip home.   I think I had 40 messages on my work computer when I got back - but none contained information I had been waiting on to complete a large task.  It finally came through late afternoon - too late for me to do much with it cause I was busy putting out other work fires.  At 4PM I said 'enough'! and walked away from the computer and headed over to my daughter's for 'girls night out'.  Got to bed a little later than usual last night and then I overslept this morning - about 40 minutes later... I didn't feel my watch buzzing to tell me to get up.  Ooops.  Not so bad, I just won't read my devotionals this morning.  Of course I COULD have just not typed in here -but why would I let you miss a day of my ramblings?

It's going to be a crazy busy day.  I get to pick up my DIL about 7:15AM this morning at the car dealership and take her to work which is a very short distance away.  Happy to do it.  Look forward to seeing her, even if only for a short while.  My neighbor, Ms. Amy called me last night.  The first call was telling me she was going to the hospital because her heart was acting up.  The second call was she wasn't going to the hospital but she had a heart doctor's appointment at 11:40AM and could I take her.  Puzzled, I asked why the assisted living wasn't taking her - that is part of their responsibility.  She said something about they said they could only take her at 8AM - which makes no sense -  How could I say no?  She reminded me she has no one else here she can call. She has no family here.  So, yes, I'll take off work and take her.  I hope it doesn't take long for I do have a lot I need to get done.  Work will always be there and it will get done so am not really worried about it - truly am not - and I don't mind taking her.  I kind of laugh - this week - with three of my bosses gone - I seem to be more busy than when they are here!  I had to schedule appointments for another leader yesterday because her EA is on vacation.  And other meetings for yet another.  It's like, hello?  I have my own work to do?  LOL  It will all get done - not a big deal.  I'm trusting God to keep me focused and help me get things done.

21 years ago today my daughter received a bone marrow transplant - BMT - for acute lymphoblastic leukemia with the Philadelphia chromosome.  It is hard to believe it has been that long, and I am grateful I did not have to bury her, as many she was in treatment with, did die.  I remember a few months after she had her BMT she had called me crying because one of the young men who had been going through the chemo when she did, didn't make it.  She knows it was by the grace of God, by all the prayers and fasting that was done for her, that she survived.  She's dealing now with pain in her liver and needs to get her doctor appointment made to get it checked out.  She's had a lot of issues with her insurance, which she has had to pay over $400 a month for - only for them to make her jump through hoops just to get prescriptions filled that she has to have for her diabetes. She finally was able to get on an insurance plan that will not give her so many problems and cost her a lot less.  

Isaiah 55:6 (NKJV):  "Seek the Lord while He may be found; call on Him while He is near."

I'm really grateful that I serve a God who is always present - omnipresent - and near to me.  So many times this crazy world we live in causes us great turmoil and problems.  But I have found over the years that even in the midst of the turmoil and troubles, God is always there.  He's always near.  And He is always ready to listen when I cry out to Him.  I'm grateful that He always hears me, and even though He doesn't always answer the way I want Him to, He always answers.  Sometimes the answer is yes, sometimes no, and sometimes 'not yet'.  

I always feels better knowing that I can call out to Him any time day or night and know that I can trust Him to be there.  He truly is closer than a friend.  

Sometimes, do you ever feel like Someone is with you, that you are not alone, and yet you are?  Yeah, that's Jesus.  I love those times cause it is such a peaceful presence in this chaotic world.  When you feel that, just sit back and enjoy it; talk with Him, He is always listening and waiting for you to share your life with Him.

I see the clock and I need to jump off here and get dressed - get started on this day.  Guess what?  Jesus will be with me everywhere I go today (and with you as well!) so I know I'll get done what I need to.

Have an awesome day!

Blessings!

A full day today, perhaps....

 With my own people that I support at work, starting today and for the rest of the week, I have 'taken on' about 8 doctors that I hope will not contact me at all.  One of the executive assistants I work with is taking today and the rest of the week, off for a medical procedure.  A heart ablation.  Sounds serious enough to me!  So she asked if I could take on her people.  Sure, I said!  No problem!  Now my thoughts are like "please, Lord, don't let any of her doctors want anything!"  It will be an ok day... if she can do it, I can do it, right?  My only concern is I also offered to take a granddaughter to her doctor appointment today so will be away from my computer for a few hours.  Oh well.  It is what it is, right?  If I'm going to get asked to do something, it will be in that timeframe, right?  I'll just handle it when I get back.

I think I made hubby mad yesterday.  Lately he has been doing a lot of grumbling about a friend of his.  He wants this friend to go to breakfast or lunch with him.  The friend has said he couldn't, because his wife has given him several chores to do at the house and he has to get those done.  She tells him what she wants done and how she wants it done, and then goes off and plays pickleball with her friends or goes shopping or out to lunch.   The thought hit me... and I verbalized it.  Hubby didn't like my thoughts about this situation.  What did I say?  "well, it is kind of like our situation, isn't it?"  "what do you mean?"  "Well, you make ME work... and you go play.  Isn't that about the same thing?"    Uh, yeah.  That didn't set well.  I guess I need to learn to keep my mouth shut and mind my own business, right?  Hubby was still acting somewhat grumpy when he brought my coffee in this morning.  This could be a long day.

I've done a lot of typing this morning.... and a lot of erasing.  My thoughts are rambling around in my mind.  I think a lot is that I didn't get to sleep until about 1AM... and that alarm went off at 4AM way too soon.  I need to start eating better and exercising and get more rest.  THEN my body should feel more energetic, right?  Oh, but to start!  Of  course I could be like hubby.... I go to my doctor for my physical in a couple weeks... if I start watching my diet now, and start exercising, then I can tell my doctor I am eating healthy, and I'm exercising, and he will be so pleased.  Right?  Ah... the key is to START... and my 'I don't want to cause there is still ice cream in the freezer' mode rears it's ugly head.  How do you deal with these thoughts?

I'm starting to collect items for Christmas here in this room.  I really do plan to cut back this year so I'm thinking that if I put a sticky note on each thing I buy and put it here in the open (on the floor out of the way), that I can stay focused on what I have bought already and not get carried away this year.  Can I do that?  Which means I need to pull out of the closet some of the things I've already bought and bring out here as well.  I think part of my problem is that when I make something, I don't put any value on it.. i.e., I made afghans for each of the grandchildren last year... but it didn't seem to be a nice enough gift and I had to buy a few things more ... when they accepted the afghan as a nice gift.  At least I think they did.  I don't have anything to make for them this year... I've already given all the grandchildren quilts (albeit cheaters quilts), so that's out.  And now I'm more concerned about 'clutter' so don't want to do that.  I'm just going to have to try and meet up with them and get them to talk and see what things they are interested in that I can buy something for.  I imagine they are all getting tired of getting t-shirts with stupid sayings on them.  I don't like to give gift cards, but when they are necessary, it is ok.  But where do they like to go?  What do they like to do?  So many questions in my mind!  Parents seem to be having a tough time with it as well so they are no help to offer ideas!

Philippians 2:14 (NIV):  "Do everything without grumbling or arguing."

Sigh. Sometimes I wonder when specific scriptures come to my mind.  Yep, that one just hit.  I 'sometimes' do a lot of grumbling, don't I!  But the Bible says, 'Do EVERYTHING without grumbling or arguing.'  Did Paul know that we would STILL be grumbling hundreds of years later?  Probably.  It's in our nature (for most of us) to grumble about something - right?  (we have to get up.  we have to work. (ok, that's my biggest grumble), we have to pay bills, we have to go here. we have to do that.  There is always something we grumble about.  So what if we try that for just today - we don't grumble or argue?  One day at a time, right?  (I wonder if I can get hubby to agree to that?)

Ok  so let's try it.  A challenge to you today.  And to me.  Let's agree to 'do everything without grumbling or arguing'.  I have confidence in you (more than I do in me, I'm afraid!) .  Let's do this.  Whenver we catch ourselves thinking negative thoughts (grumbling, right?), let's stop ourselves and put it in a positive report.  Just because someone else is grumpy, doesn't mean we have to be.  Just because work is causing angst, we don't have to let it affect our attitudes.  

We've got this - right?  Let's work on it together.  Let's see if we can do this for one day.  Then let's go for two days. And then three days.  Let's be better, because we want to be better.  And watch our troubles fall away!  Ready?  Let's do this!

Blessings!