Day 4....and I am ready to go home.

 I told hubby earlier in the year as he was talking about our anniversary getaway that 5 days was too long when nothing is planned.  But, once again, I gave in to him.  So here we are at day 4, and I'm not complaining, just stating facts. I could have pushed on it, but chose not to.  We've gone out to eat. We got gas for the car. We went to the market. What is left to do?  Every time I bring up an antique shop, the grumbling starts, and I just don't want to deal with it. There is a bear shop we have passed a few times and I've mentioned stopping, and again, grumbling.  I am pretty sure - although I could be wrong - that it has to do with walking.  So we have gone out to eat, then come back here.  We've sat outside most of the time, and it's been wonderful, watching the clouds come and go, the birds flying around, breathing decent air, temps in low 70's.  We even wear a sweater!  Hubby forgot his so has been wearing mine while I wear a hoodie.   We sat out until the sun went down yesterday (about 5 or so hours I'd imagine) - and both of us have our face sunburnt!  I finally finished a baby blanket last night. We've read.  And napped. And rested.

But I'm getting antsy and need to be doing something.  I went to bed with a headache last night and still have it this morning. Didn't bring anything but my 'strong stuff' and I'm trying to not take it.  I am pretty sure it is my teeth moving with this retainer that is causing the headaches (but then, it could be hubby too, ya know) but I didn't sleep much last night and finally got up at 3:30a and tried to lay here on the couch - but couldn't sleep so here I am.  Drinking coffee and I made it a bit stronger so am hoping the caffeine will take care of the headache.  Having these plastic retainers are a pain.  I can only leave them in for water - everything else I have to take them out. Meaning, coffee, they are out. Milk or soda, food, snacks, any of that - I have to take them out.  Maybe it is my having to put on and take off that is causing the headache. It has kept me from snacking much - if they are in, I choose not to snack cause it's troublesome to take them out.  They are out now with having coffee here by my side and I'll leave them out until we have breakfast.

We finally made it to the market yesterday and picked up lunchmeat, buns, a couple oranges, cereal and milk.  We finished up our salads last night along with a ham sandwich and chips.  That will save us money - geez, by eating breakfast and lunch - it was costing a lot to eat per day~ and if you know me, I have my limits on spending for food. Buying things to give away - I'll spend it all, but food, naw. We can get by. LOL  And, no, I haven't bought anything because we haven't been anywhere!  So, then, maybe that is a good thing?

I'm concerned about hubby.  Seriously.  It's like he has 'given in' to his inabilities to do things.  I know it was pretty much the same at home, but not as obvious.  He sleeps - a lot. Frequently napping for 30-60 minutes at a time.  He shuffles even more and walks hunched over even more, it seems - or maybe I haven't been watching. He's very careful to hold on to walls when he is climbing stairs or walking. (use his walker? Oh heaven forbid!) It seems all he does is TV, read, eat, sleep. Altho he has not been able to get the TV to work up here and I refuse to contact the host to find out how.  But then, like I said, that's what he does at home, but I'm noticing how much weight he is putting on in the middle as well. As if I have any room to talk.  I don't.  He had to get his Dr. Pepper yesterday.. and no, not the diet Dr. Pepper which (supposedly) has less sugar... he has to have the one with all the sugar in it.  I know that doesn't help.

Wow - with the retainer out, and nearly a full cup of coffee in me, my headache is abating.  Grateful.  I'm hoping (in a way) we don't go anywhere today.  Last night hubby was saying how much he is enjoying our getting away.  In other words, I'm quarantined with him so he isn't alone, and it's much cooler here.  I've decided this is the last year we will go away. His comment back was 'we'll see'.  Sigh. If we aren't going to 'see' anything, or 'do' anything, why ... ok, I'll hush. Anyone else like me?  (erase)

It was weird yesterday morning at 5:30-ish.... the alarm sounded three times (did I mention this yesterday?) and then stopped. I'm 'on guard' for it to go off this morning, but it didn't go of the first morning. It's 5:17a.... will it or won't it?  Nothing I can do if it does. I just hope it also shuts off by itself.

We did see 4 elk walking through the yard yesterday.  I had heard an animal noise and got up to look (we were on the porch) and finally I saw them and tried to get hubby to see them, but by the time he scraped the chair on the porch a few times trying to get up out of the chair, and talking "where are they?", they quickly wandered off.  It looked like one with horns and three without.  The 'king' with his harem?

My son came home from the hospital yesterday. I got 'dinged' he was home, but waited until later to check on him. He said he was tired, and I left it at that. Understandably tired, I'm sure, and it will take a few days to get his strength back.  Any invasion on the body takes its toll and needs to rest to heal. Grateful to God for answered prayers on his behalf.

My sister got her birthday packages (her birthday is Sunday) the past two days. One was full of oatmeal cookies and chocolate... and the one she got yesterday had her gifts in it. She was surprised at some things I sent. And that's the way birthdays are supposed to be, right?  Full of surprises. I know the cookies surprised her!  I called her when I got her thank you text and hubby kept inserting comments while I was trying to talk to her.  I finally turned to him and told him that was the reason I would go into the other room to talk - I don't need his comments! He only hears one side of the conversation (plus he doesn't know what I sent her).  He finally hushed but didn't leave. We didn't talk much since she knew he was still sitting there. But at least she got her gifts early - hers didn't arrive until last Tuesday and it was to be here the Saturday before my birthday! 

James 1:2-4 (ESV)  Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

None of us count it 'all joy' when we run into trials, do we? I certainly do not.  But perhaps I need to look at some of my trials. Perhaps the trials are there for me to learn some things.  Maybe what hubby is going through is to teach me about compassion, about patience.  I think about some of the things I've had to do for him that he could not do for himself.... and I honestly was surprised that I was able to do it. Maybe being a caregiver would be my next profession if I ever retire?  Which more than likely, won't be anytime soon.   What trial are you in that you feel you are being tested?  I need to be more kind. I need to be more compassionate. This is definitely a trial at times.  At least for me.  I hope when I have difficulties as I age that my children are more compassionate than I have been with hubby at times. 

And with that, I'm getting off here. It's 5:40a and hubby is just getting up; the alarm did not go off at 5:30a like it did yesterday.  Hubby is up, I'll grab another cup of coffee, and get some reading done. Just thought I'd do this first this time. 

Have an amazing day.  Remember that whatever you are going through, learn through it.

Blessings!

It's 'All About ME' today!

 Yes.  It is all about ME today.  It is my 76th birthday and although I expect a quiet day, it is a good day.  I've already received texts from my big brother and little sister.  Surprisingly, the youngest hasn't sent it 12:01AM text this year.  Has he forgotten me?  I was able to have dinner with my oldest son last night and enjoyed that time with him.  I hope he doesn't mind us 'visiting' him those times.  It just gives me an opportunity to spend time with him, albeit 'shared'.  And I get to eat, which is always good.

I put together a pot of coffee to start this morning, but I'm finding I didn't make enough.  I just went out for a second cup and only got about 1/3 of a cup and finished the pot.  I made it for six cups, but our cups are pretty big.  I guess I need to go for 8 cups.  Usually we end up throwing away 4 cups or so when hubby makes a pot - never asked him how big a pot he made. Thought I'd cut it in half. I must bake a pretty good cup of coffee? I dunno.

Since I got up first, I started the pot, and hubby woke up about 30 minutes later.  He brought me my cup of coffee and a very nice card with a gift card in it.  I never can tell anyone what I 'need' or 'want' - because I don't know myself.  And he's informed me that our trip the week of the 18th is our anniversary gift.  Ok, does that mean he is going to pay for it and not leave it on my credit card?  Doesn't matter; I still pay for it, right? He gets offended if I know acknowledge his contribution. And I'll leave it at that.

Have you ever wondered about someone's mental status?  I have a few people I wonder that about. But this time, all I can do is shake my head.  I had told this person she would get a gift from me yesterday. I sent her a photo of the delivery when Amazon delivered. Late last night she tells me, "I promise, I didn't get anything from you!"  I send the photo from Amazon again (it showed 3 packages delivered) and she sends me a photo of her husband an another relative putting together a doll house for a two year old grandchild.  I send Amazon a note that the package wasn't received.  She was sure it had not been received. Then she asked what I sent so I sent a photo to her.  Her comment back? "I'm sorry, I did receive that. I didn't know what it was, nor did my friend, and we didn't know who sent it."  By this time I don't know whether to roll my eyes or shake my head! Or both!  She then asked if I was mad or angry at her because she didn't know what it was.  No.... but since I had told her I was sending something, wouldn't you think that if you received a package that you didn't order, that you would contact the person who told you they had sent something and ask if they had sent it?  I need to check my order on Amazon, for I thought I had sent a note with it.  And she probably missed it if I did.  Shaking my head at this person!  Or maybe I should shake my head at me for doing something nice!

My neighbor, Ms. Vicky, txt'd me yesterday to meet her at the mailbox at 11:30AM yesterday. So I did.  She gave me a dozen pink roses and a piece of cake. She thought the cake was Boston Cream Pie - but it wasn't - it was a cafe leche something or other.  I'm not sure what it is, but it is cake on the bottom that is soaked in milk (leche) and soggy, with cake on top and then iced. No, it was not my Boston cream pie that I like so well (and make really well too).  I did eat a couple bites, and shared with hubby, but I threw the rest away.  Yeah, I will tell her thank you, and leave it at that.  My roses are beautiful though and I have them sitting in a vase on the table.

Hubby wants to take me to brunch this morning for my birthday. To do so will mean I need to clean up nice.  I suppose I need to let him; sometimes that makes the day nicer, know what I mean?  It's almost 7AM now.... maybe in another hour... I should eat, anyway, right?  And it's my birthday so carbs don't count, right?   I have no plans for today.  I expect Amazon to deliver a couple packages form my brother and a friend, but that's it. My daughter sent a gift the other day.  I got my sister's gift last month. My little brother only calls me (and that's ok).  I just like to know I'm not forgotten. :-)  Don't we all. We say it doesn't matter... but deep down, we all want to know someone remembers us, right?   Hubby also wants to take me to dinner... or maybe he changed it to brunch because I don't want to go to a 'fancy place' for dinner.  One would think that by now people would realize that I don't need fancy things... I prefer their company and a peanut butter sandwich.  Does that make sense?

I'm actually at a loss as to what to write about today.  I've sat here for a few minutes and scrolled through a few birthday greetings on facebook.  Oh yeah - I remember what I wanted to share this morning!

Isaiah 65:2 (NKJV):  All day long I opened my arms to a rebellious people. But they follow their own evil paths.

Now that is something to post on my birthday, isn't it!  During my time with God this morning, I have reflected over my life and the devil reminded me of my path I chose when I was far away from God.  It wasn't pretty.  I had to tell the devil where to go and ask God to erase that memory from my thoughts.  Not that I shouldn't remember from where I came from, but that my sins from that era do not drag me down.  Jesus acknowledged people who said they knew Him ... but saying they 'know' Him and doing His will, are two separate things.

Matthew 7:21 (NKJV):  Not everyone who says to Me, "'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven."

We can be 'good' people and do things for others, but unless we put Jesus first, all we do is in vain.  As I sat here and reflected over my life, some bad stuff came to mind, yes, but I know that as I have confessed my sins, God has forgiven me completely and remembers them no more.  (which is why I can tell the devil to go to hell and leave me alone).  We serve a might, and great God and all praise, honor and glory is due Him.  I am so grateful that we have God, who forgives us completely and doesn't hold our sins against us.  Others may, but God doesn't, and He is the one who counts.

I am a sinner saved by God's grace.  Every day I am grateful that He chose me to love Him.  And He chose you as well.  I am so blessed by Him.  And I can in return, praise and bless the One who has rescued me and set my feet on His solid Rock.  Hallelujah!

BTW... for those concerned.... God did answer prayers about my struggle... and I talked with hubby yesterday morning about our trip, and he said I could drive.  He says my driving scares him... but I bet it isn't half as much as his driving scares me and everyone else!  LOL The only down from my driving is that I have to watch the road and drive - and not get to crochet all the way there.  And that's ok. I'll have plenty of time to do that while there, right?  Honestly, I don't enjoy driving that much.... but at least I know my life is in my hands.... if you know what I mean. Thank you for your prayres.

My daughter just called to wish me happy birthday.  She is enjoying being in New Mexico with her new grandchild, son, and daughter-in-law.  She will be back home on Tuesday.  

And with that - I guess I'll hush and jump off here.  I will get dressed and tell hubby 'let's go eat' (I'm starting to get hungry!)  Hope that you have an amazing day!

Blessings!

Chaotic and Busy

 That is exactly how my day went yesterday.  I was busy from the get-go with scheduling meetings and then taking the monitor to 'that person' and then the board meeting.... and add in numerous texts and phone calls - and even a bundt cake delivery from my one boss - and a granddaughter/great-granddaughter visit late afternoon........ dinner after work and the youngest 'doing this thing'... sigh.... I slept good last night because I was just exhausted from the day.  Surely it isn't old age!!  And then as I signed off the work computer I noticed an email of someone I had forgotten to include in the board meeting.  Ooops. 

And then we have today..... it will be busy as I will need to finish up everything before going on vacation tomorrow.  I am actually getting excited about getting away and not working for a few days.  I'm just mentally stressed out and exhausted, I think.  I definitely need a break.  And after this next week - I have a few days off in September for Jailbreak Getaway.  

But the day yesterday did start off good in that my meeting with my boss on the mid-year reviews - she once again gave me 'exceeds expectations' and that I qualify for a lateral move.... although we both know I don't want to move to another position.... I want to stay right where I am.  I'm too (lazy) old to learn new things.  Naw, it's just I just plain don't want to learn new things.

I did my workout this morning but my trainer was somewhat distracted with his own personal things going on... which was disappointing as it was to be about me that half hour.  But I did get a good workout in - albeit that we did the same exercises I did on Tuesday.  And I told him so.  But he had created a new sheet to record my things on and thought he had reversed what we did before.  So we both get a week 'off' the 30 minutes of exercise and I don't see him again until a week from Tuesday.   Hubby went with me today and walked the treadmill and rode the bike while I did my workout.

I love that my granddaughters love to create things as I get to be the recipient of them!  Well, sometimes.  I got a really nice bag from my granddaughter yesterday that she knitted and sewed together.  Hubby thinks I should use it as a cosmetic bag - but it would get all snagged if I did... and I don't wear cosmetics that much to where I use a bag... but she said she was thinking of my crochet hooks - and I think that is what I will use it for.  Besides, when I carry my tote bag that she made for me, I can show it off when I take it out to pull out a hook.  After all... I am a 'hooker'.  tee hee.  You've seen the funny things on facebook where people say  "my husband tells me I'm old because I 'crochet'... saying it in a really old voice... so I looked it up and crochet means 'to hook', so I'm a 'hooker'.  LOL Cracks me up every time.

Psalm 46:1 (NKJV): "..... God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."

It's always good to have that reminder that whenever we are struggling and trying to push through on things, that if we give it to God, surrender that issue or trouble to Him, He truly is our refuge and our strength.  He will always help, if we only surrender it and ask Him.   Today is going to be one of those days that I do ask for His help  I have so much to get done today.  I'm sure you do as well - why not take a moment and just ask Him to help you through today.  To give you clarity of mind and give you the strength to accomplish any task that comes before you.  He will, you know.

7 minutes to signing on for work so guess I need to get off and get moving today.  Hubby is already panicking that he needs to pack today.  He is still doing his Bible study in the morning (yay!!  I get free time!!)  and will only have a few hours before we leave... so I look at him and say "you can pack tomorrow - it's not a big deal."  I don't plan to pack until tomorrow.... and I have errands to run in the morning too!  He is such a stresser that he stresses me! LOL

Hope that you have a blessed day - I gotta get busy!

Blessings!

Yes, it was a good day....

 My birthday has now come and gone and it was a good day.  One of my bosses is not happy at all..... I guess he orderd flowers for me... and they didn't get delivered.  They even called me yesterday morning and verified the address and wanted to confirm I would be home.  I told them I would be home until 4:30PM and they said they'd be here before then.  They were not.  But I did receive lots of emails and ecards from friends at work and calls and/or texts from all my children and from most of my grandchildren.  My siblings either called or text'd me.  It was a very good day.  Last night was a usual Tuesday night in that hubby had his study so I went to my daughters'.  She bought dinner and after that we sat and crochet'd - same as usual.  She was taking us to dinner tonight but it's been moved to Thursday night - so I need to figure out what to have tonight.  

Counting down to vacation, still.  This morning was another sleepy morning and I wanted to go back to sleep.  I slept most of the night but was awake about 3:40AM so just got up.  Took my 'pill' so had to stay sitting up for 30 minutes or so... really couldn't sleep.  May try to get a ten minute nap in some time today if it isn't busy.  I know I have a couple meetings I need to schedule from the 'get go'.

I received some cash for my birthday and I'm thinking about putting it towards an Apple watch.  There isn't anything I need, and I wasn't expecting the cash.  Yes, I could save it... but it IS my birthday money and with that I can do something that I wouldn't do normally, right?  I've checked prices and talked to some that I knew had them.  My little sister has a series 3 and loves it. Lori, my friend, has a series 5 and since she has afib, she loves how it monitors her heart so she can tell if something is going on.  I know my brother is really encouraging me to get one.  He has the series 6, but told me to get the series 7, which is the newest.  It really does a lot of things.  The series 7 has a bigger screen, you can talk through it, you can text on it, it monitors several things... including heart monitoring, and he can even see his glucose on his series 6.  That would be good for diabetics.   Did I mention you can talk through it without your phone?  He doesn't have the cellular and said I didn't need it and he has been 200 ft away from his phone and can still talk on it.  Oh - and if you fall or bump into something, it will ask if you are hurt.  If you say yes, it will automatically call 911 for you.   At my age, and considering I don't carry my phone around with me here in the house, it could come in handy.  My brother said he could send hubby his old one if I get one.  Since hubby is so afraid of falling and is unsteady on his feet, that could be a good thing.  Will continue to think about it and make a decision by the time we get back from vacation.  The youngest son said he could take me to the base exchange - it's about $30 cheaper than the Apple store and you don't pay tax. Oh it also monitors steps and lots of other things.  

I don't remember.... did I tell you about this weird thing that happened yesterday?  Where - without my touching my side table in here, my coffee cup tipped over?  All by itself.  It was empty, but it was as if someone had knocked it over.  When I told hubby about it, he said the day before, in the front room where we have a few things on the 'coffee table', he was sitting in his recliner and a couple items on that coffee table fell off.  No one was near it.  Now for that, I could possibly think that our cleaning person set a couple light items close to the edge and the air conditioner blows directly on that area so could have blown it off.  But my coffee cup?  No explanation.  Makes me want to go through the house and anoint it and pray through it again.

Jeremiah 29:11:  "I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you."

I know many of us have heard that scripture many times and some of us even know it by heart.  I know I have often quoted it to others as an encouragement to not give up, but push through, for if God has set them on that path, He will get them through it.   You might not have it all together, but have peace knowing that you are God's treasure.   He watches over each one of us, ready to help us.  Many times He is just waiting for us to call on Him.

One of the emails I received yesterday reminded me of how our daily lives affect others.  Even unknowingly.  Without boasting, may I share some of what this person wrote to me?  We were friends at another company and I had helped her get this job where I am now.  There was a point tho that she turned against me because I had called her out on having idols in her house.  But as I continued to be nice to her and not change how I treated her, and I prayed for her during a rough time when her husband got unexpectedly sick and she was out a year with heart trouble, she wanted to be friends again.  Here is what she wrote:  "I am reflecting when we first met back int he Centene days. The leadership you showed me, the tenacity and grace and love you poured onto everyone there. I was so impressed by you when I met you. Whenever I needed a friend to lean on you dropped everything and talked to me! .......I knew that I wanted to be an EA just like you and learn as much as I can for that role someday - I know God was listening to my heart and now I have a great career and so happy, since I learned so much from you.  You even helped me get closer to God during these times. In the past year my heart was crying for a closer relationship with the Lord and I didn't know how to navigate that - there you were sending me these amazing daily books to read. As I read them, I cry and learn and opened my heart even more. I cannot thank you enough for that!....." 

I am so humbled to read that God used me to help someone who needed Him.  It's not about me at all, but about a merciful and gracious God who loves beyond measure and is always reaching out to His children.  All we need to be is open and ready to share Him.  People watch you, and just sometimes, they want what you have inside.  Something to think about.

Blessings!