Wednesday evening was a tough evening. As you are aware, we have discussed this topic numerous times, with others and with each other. A friend of a friend came over before we left to meet Sheeba. She was very skittish around him, even barking at him. We decided it was because he was currently dog-sitting and had their smell on him. Sheeba wasn't sure who this person was. Eventually she warmed up to him; especially when he put the leash on her to take for a short walk. We asked him to think about it and get back with us after our vacation. We were not going to push Sheeba off on him; we were still flip-flopping to let her go.
It was a very hard decision. I must admit the doctor who gave me my diagnosis of osteopenia really made me fearful of falling or getting my bones hurt. To me it's 'what's the big deal - you fall and break a bone, so what?'. But the problem is, my bones don't heal like they used to. The doctor said that he didn't want me in the hospital because of broken bones because I could get sick there. I joked with him and said that 'yeah, my mother went into the hospital with a broken ankle.... and died'. True statement. Mother had a lot of medical issues so it all was against her coming out of it. But it made me think about it. I sometimes think that when Sheeba threw me into the doorway the last time she cracked my wrist bone for it was swollen and blue for a week. Why am I thinking that? Well, I'll get to that in a bit.
Hubby contacted this friend Wednesday and we were told that 'yes' he did want Sheeba. They called later and said they were on the way to get her. Anguish filled my heart (and hubby's) as we thought about this decision. Was it the right one? We gathered all her toys (even the squeaky ones I only let her have on occasion), the dog food, cleaned her feeding stand and gathered her bowls. Folded up her crate and things were ready. LOL Sheeba had so much 'stuff' (spoiled, for sure!) that it filled up the back of the car! Again Sheeba played skittish - for about 5 minutes. He took her out on the leash and she was his best friend. The car got loaded up; we finished saying our goodbyes to Sheeba. It hurt inside really bad. But we both know it is for the best - for Sheeba.
We were told by our friend that if we ever decide we want her back, he will bring her back to us immediately. Also, if we ever want to visit, we are always welcome to do so. I don't know if we will take advantage of that offer or not. I don't want to confuse her. This was the perfect timing to let her go. She had been at the pet hotel for two weeks and away from us. We had her back only a day and a half. Going off with our friend didn't bother her in the least.
Yesterday morning our friend sent us photos of Sheeba. One was of her in her new fenced in back yard with lots of running space. Another was of Sheeba laying down at his feet. She is in love with her new 'master'. She will be loved, and well cared for, and that is all we can pray for. Sheeba may be physically gone from our home, but will always be in our hearts. And now, no more dogs. Especially big dogs are out of the question. If I was younger where I could hold on to her, I would have refused to let her go. Being dragged by her leash across two yards and falling... well, I was lucky I didn't land on concrete that time. Our house is quiet and still.
Funny..... hubby said he got up yesterday morning to get my coffee and used his phone for light as he went to the bathroom and down the hallway to the kitchen. He did that every morning so that he wouldn't wake up Sheeba (so he thought). He got to the kitchen before he remembered she was gone and could turn on the kitchen light. Yeah, she was spoiled. I'm glad we found someone who will love her and care for her. But it doesn't make it any easier to let her go.
I think I mentioned I started taking the Fosamax I was given for my osteopenia. The first day I was ok; didn't experience anything different - other that my wrists hurting ... the left one where it had been fractured several years ago.... and the right one where Sheeba had thrown me into the door frame.... which is why it made me wonder if I had cracked the bone. It was just in one area where it had been swollen. Interesting. All else was ok..... until about 12:30AM yesterday morning when I was awakened out of a deep sleep with both of my legs aching as if I had ran a marathon. (not that I had ran a marathon - ever - but it made me think of that) The pain lasted for about a half hour, and then I was able to drift back off to sleep. Yesterday evening my neck and upper back were aching before we went to bed. Took an aspirin and rubbed arthritic cream on my neck and upper back and was able to sleep most of the night. I'm hoping this won't be a repeat every week; I take the medication only once a week.
I'm thankful to God that we have friends that are willing to help us with Sheeba. This friend had 'lost' his German Shepherd five years ago and it was only recently he gave thought to getting another. Sheeba is identical to the one he lost. Ironically, her name was 'Shira'. I feel a part of me has been taken away, but I know this void will heal. When I lost Marley, a big hole was there. Letting Sheeba go was hard, but at least I know she will be well taken care of.
Have pretty much gotten caught up with work. Need to learn how to do timecards. And soon. I still want to retire, and yet, I know things will be very tight if I do. I'd be willing to give it a try.... but hubby isn't. That hurts.... but another topic altogether.
I don't have much else to add today so will close. Will try to get back to writing as I wanted this to be soon. My heart has lost some of the joy... and I often have to tell myself that people and dogs are not my joy and strength.
My joy and strength comes from the Lord. Only He can supply all that I need. He alone is my strength, my healer, my joy, my peace.
Blessings.
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