Home.... and it didn't start out well.... sigh...

It is good to be home and in my own bed.  I slept good last night and didn't wake up at all during the night.  And that's with a nap around noon!  

We did leave early yesterday morning to head back home.  In fact, once we packed, ate some breakfast, straightened up the airbnb, we left and were on the road by 8:30AM, I think.  No sense in just sitting and waiting until 11AM to leave - so we locked up and left.  Trip back was uneventful - got to Fountain Hills and I remembered White Castles was there so we stopped there for lunch.  I was so full!  I love White Castles; I grew up on White Castles.  They are definitely my 'comfort food', but I certainly can't eat them like I did growing up!  I did buy a box of 20 and brought home with me.  I'll put what's left in the freezer this morning.  

(erase.  sigh).  After arriving home 4-5 hours earlier than I had planned to (I was the first one dropped off), hubby was caught offguard and hadn't completed a couple things he should have.  That threw him in a bad mood because he was 'busted' he hadn't done them.  It made for a very tense and quiet afternoon.  Late afternoon our new neighbor called and she had me laughing (she really is a hoot!).  After hanging up, hubby commented "it's good to hear you laughing".  I didn't say anything.  It's rare that anything makes me laugh anymore - I mean, truly deep down laugh.  And so many times I need those desperately to breathe life back into me.

Things are back to normal this morning; I got up early and came into my room to read my Bible.... and hubby gets up about 1/2 hour later and brings me my coffee.  It's Saturday so I don't have to keep an eye on the clock so will stay in here a bit longer than I usually do.  I slept well last night so hopefully caught up on my sleep.  We are to have lunch today with friends from one of the RV parks we speak at.  They called while I was away and we got it scheduled.  They are a fun couple and we have met them a few times over the last few years before they head back to - Wisconsin, I think it is.  I think they leave next week.  So I guess I need to get moving soon and get a shower.  It will be fun to visit with them.

I also want to 'make' myself get on the treadmill today.  I've eaten junk food most of the week and I definitely need to get my body back on track by eating healthy - or at least 'more healthy' than I have been.  Dill Pickle potato chips and white castles were my dinner last night.  Yeah, it's time to eat healthy again.  Ok - I will not throw the dill pickle potato chips away so may have to just go ahead and eat them, right?

I'm glad I have the weekend to 'rest' from vacation before going back to work on Monday.  I haven't checked emails and I really have no desire to.  Usually we are gone for Jailbreak over the weekend and then I have to go right back to work the next day - so it feels nice not to have to.  Not that my life is any great excitement over the weekends either.  I'm just glad I don't have to think about work stuff.

Got to shake this heaviness that comes occasionally.  Maybe tomorrow I'll be back on track and feel like sharing more about the goodness of God.  He really is good, you know.  He is my sustainer in life.  He is my Joy when I have none.  It's kind of like that scripture....

2 Corinthians 4:8-9 (NKJV): "We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted but not forsaken; struck down but not destroyed...."

Life beats us up sometimes, people say mean and hateful things, life hurts... but when we place our Hope in Jesus, He makes all things new.  He is my Comfort, my Shield, my Hope, my Life.  Without Him, I probably would not be here today.  He holds my hand and walks through the toughest parts of life with me.  And He never lets go.

He's got you too.  Hang on, cause sometimes the ride is rocky.

Blessings!

Final day and packing to head home....

And like most vacations, after 3 days, yeah, it's time to go home.  What's the saying my brother always told me.... something about after 4 days the 'fish begin to smell'.  LOL  I think it is more that we are far enough away from everything (about 25 minutes) and then nothing spectacular other than a Walmart, that one can only do so much sitting - whether crocheting, reading, or watching movies. But that is me, too.  Our days are spent focused on the baby (and nothing wrong with that!) to make sure she doesn't fall down stairs or get into things.  But overall, she has been so very good.  We did watch a movie last night and it was good - Love Guaranteed - on Netflik.  Clean, no language, sex or nudity.  Those are the kind of movies I like.  Good story too.

We did see something special yesterday afternoon!  We had taken a run into town and found the Dairy Queen (gotta love Turtle Pecan Blizzards!) after stopping at the creek long enough for the baby to sit and put her feet in it for a little bit (she wanted to jump in and play, but was restrained).  It was a beautiful day out.  When we got back home we were just doing 'stuff' - when my granddaughter commented she saw 'something'!  We run to look and there are FIVE female Elk at the side of the house - on the other side of the fence that surrounds the back of the house.  I mean, a few of them were within 20 feet of us!  We stood outside on the wrap around porch and watched them until they all walked away, eating foliage, and just looking back on occasion at us.  Weren't afraid of us; they ate and just walked around.  It was really cool to see something besides squirrels!  Thank you, Father!

I managed to stay up on my Bible study this week - and I will work on today's lesson tonight when I get home.  I slept until 5:22AM this morning when the little one woke up, and since they are all up and moving, I do need to get my butt in gear and moving too.  But I have taken time to read my Bible and pray this morning.  My lesson isn't a big deal.  I have a feeling my sister isn't going to do it with me, so after one more time of asking, if she hasn't been working in it, I'm not going to bring it up.  And the reason I love this study is that it has a 'make it personal' day in which it asks the 'hard questions' about life and how do we react to things, how do we think about thinks, how do we do things... questions that you sometimes want ot ignore and not respond to becuase it isn't the answer you know it should be - if you are totally honest.  We don't even share those questions - they really are for our personal benefit.  But last week she didn't want to do them; they were too personal.  Ok... do you want to grow, or not?  I do them and I answer honestly.  And some of the answers, regrettfully, are 'no'.  I would love to answer 'yes, I do that.  I respond that way'.  But I can't.  I fail. I screw up.  I.Don't.Want.To.Do.It.That.Way.  Yet, I know that I should.  It's that conscience thing, ya know?

Heading back home today we will be taking our time.  Since I'm on the north end, I may be the first dropped off, and that's ok.  Hubby will be glad to see me and I can unpack and get things done.  I need to check on what hubby has and hasn't done... he told me my first night here and we chatted... he put bacon in the microwave for ten minutes.  You can just imagine.  Sigh.  It heated up so hot with the bacon grease.... the plate inside the microwave shattered.  He has called the warranty place to come check the microwave and bring a new plate.  I just remained silent.  He knows better than to put it in the microwave for ten minutes.  WHO cooks bacon in the microwave for ten minutes?  Sigh.  It is the little things like that, that can make me anxious when I'm not at home.  Last week we again talked about the little things he does that make no sense... and I begged him to tell his doctor.

I think a lot of it is that he is alone with his thoughts - and he just quits thinking.  If someone is with him that stimulates his conversation, it isn't quite as bad.  And it isn't often.  It's just that occasional 'what were you thinking' or 'why would you do that?'.

Ok - I need to stop and start getting dressed at least and maybe start packing as well. I hear the girls downstairs moving about.  Time to get this show going - we leave in about 4 hours.

Blessings upon your day!

 

Day Three - and I'm not real sure what we are doing....

 Yesterday we made a trip back to town and had lunch at a Mexican 'hole in the wall' and the food was pretty good and large portions of it as well.  Even the child's meal of a bean burrito and french fries was enough for an adult.  The burrito itself was about 6-8 inches long, 2-3 inches across, and about an inch high!  Yeah, leftovers.  We picked up condiments for hamburgers for lunch today, and chocolate covered strawberries for dessert, and a few other things.  We also found a place that a friend had told hubby and I about a few months ago.  This place is called 'A bucket of spaghetti' and it is only 'to go'.  And that is what you get!  There are three sizes of buckets, depending on how many people eating.  We got the family size and got also a half loaf of buttered garlic toast.  Oh my.  We heated it up for dinner last night and still have leftovers and it was really good.  We got just the spaghetti and the maranaira sauce, but you can also buy meatballs if you want.  We stuck with sauce.  I told hubby we found it so when we come up in August to this general area, we will definitely pick up a bucket to get us through a couple meals.  That is one of hubby's comfort foods - he gets it often at restaurants.  

There is a small creek that runs somewhere around here and there is parking beside it.  I think that is where we are going to go for a little while today.  Perhaps after the baby has her nap this morning.  We haven't been able to do the 'hiking' we had thought of doing, but have stayed close to the house.  Found a tree house and a swing on the property.  My daughter and I saw two huge squirrels playing out in the woods yesterday as we stood at the window.  It was fun watching them run around.  That's the 'wildlife' we've seen thus far.

I struggled to get up this morning; I really didn't want to .  I slept much better last night than the night before, but I knew I wanted to do my quiet time before the others woke up.  I also knew I needed to take my Fosamax that I forgot to take yesterday.  AND I have to stay up once I take it.  I finally made myself get up at 4:20AM to take my pill and start my Bible reading.  I have realized I can't also do my study because I am listening for the others to move about and can't concentrate.  So I got caught up last night on what I didn't get done earlier.  We were actually in bed around 9PM last night - which was good for me.  I was able to finish my study and get some good sleep in.

One thing about vacations, one tends to snack a lot more on food you don't normally snack on.  AND, one doesn't drink the water one does at home.  Yep.  By last night my body seemed to be screaming "STOP IT ALREADY"!!  So I downed more water and stopped snacking.  Got tog et back to eating healthy cause donuts and cookies (even the wafer cookies I had bought two packages of and shared with the baby, and I have already eaten probably a whole package by myself) and lots of carbs of other things... it just doesn't go well with my body.  I feel bloated and out of sorts - and I don't like feeling this way.  Perhaps I needed to go off eating good to eating bad - to see how much better I feel when I do eat good.  Food for thought, perhaps? LOL

Need to jump in the shower and I definitely need a cup of coffee this morning!  My 1/2 hour wait after I take my pill is over and done withs ome time ago so I need to take the rest of my daily pills and get my day started.  I hear the others downstairs and need to get this body moving.

It's so nice to look out into the forrest and see the beauty that God has made.  Each tree He designed and created.  It's beautiful up here.  One only needs to pause their busy schedules and look/

Take some time today to pause and look up into the sky and marvel at the beauty and handiwork of our God.  Isn't it awesome?

Blessings!

Day two - and I realize....

 a couple things already.  One, I'm not as young as I used to be.... and two, I have let myself go to where I don't have as much energy anymore.    Reality happens at times, doesn't it!

We got photos taken before we headed out of town - some were really good - and then ate lunch at the food court in the mall before heading out.  Finally arriving at the cabin around 5:30PM we lugged everything in and I started dinner with things I brought from home.  We didn't eat until around 6:30-7PM so we messed up the great-granddaughter's schedule.  She finally got her bath and put to bed - but she wasn't having it.  I think she was awake all night.  My poor granddaughter will definitely need a nap today - and so will I!  I'm glad we all had separate bedrooms, but I think tonight my daughter, granddaughter, and great-granddaughter will be sharing a bed - and I'll still be alone.   The little one needs someone on each side of her to snuggle with.  

So I'm dragging a bit this morning and couldn't wait to get a cup of coffee.  And a couple donuts.  Finally I fixed a bowl of raisin bran to get the sugar rush taken care of.  I don't normally eat donuts... but lack of sleep and trying to wake up kind of does that to you.  At least to me.  I eat.  That is supposed to take care of everything.  So now I'm good for the morning.  

I'm back in my room so that I can add to this.  My schedule is messed up as I didn't complete my quiet time as I am usually able to.  I wanted to help my granddaughter - but the great-granddaughter, once I got her diaper changed, was having nothing to do with me.  She wanted grandma this time, not Oma.  So here I am, back in my room, and trying to sink into quietness and rest.

Our airbnb is really nice and perfect for adults.  There are a couple steps in between the front room and dining/kitchen area so we have to watch the little one there.  She has learned to sit down and go down the steps that way so that helps.  But the other we hadn'tt thought about.... stairs leading to two bedrooms/and bathroom.  (One bedroom and bath is downstairs).  Baby seems to think the stairs are her play area so we are chasing her some as she heads there.    Love the room we have, though, and we have a walk-around porch that is really nice.  We've already decided we need another trip to town, although we hadn't planned on it.  

We were spoiled last year at the airbnb we had.  They had condiments in the refrigerator and other things that we could use.  Here - they have nothing.  No extra water bottles, no condiments, nothing.  I have found that a bit disappointing because we didn't pick up relish and mustard and catsup cause we figured it would be here.  Well, it isn't. So now a trip to the store after naps and we'll pick up things we could have even brought with us.  Next time we will just bring everything so we won't be disappointed.  

In doing my lesson this morning it was on the subject of pride.  That's a touchy subject for some people.  No one sees pride in themselves, it is always others who see it first.  But until one recognizes that some of the things they do or expect out of others to make themselves look good, is nothing more than pride.  We need to get rid of the pride and be covered with humility.  The exalted will fall, the humble will be exalted.  Something to think about.

Well, looks like the great-granddaughter has come to visit me in my room so I need to get off and get moving again.  Maybe tomorrow my thought will be better.

Have a blessed day!

Day one of vacation... I'm so ready!

I awoke at 3;30AM this morning - not because of excitement of finishing up to leave for vacation, but because I woke up.  So rather than tossing and turning, trying to go back to sleep, I went ahead and got up - and tried to go back to sleep in my chair.  That didn't seem to happen.  So about 4:30AM I started my reading... and of course got so sleepy.  Hubby brought in my coffee, and even that didn't entice me to stay awake.  So ok, I'm thinking, I'll try to sleep agin.  Well, I may have, but my end result is that I now have a headache.  Did I sleep?  Did I sleep deep?  Heck if I know!  Finally, I decided I needed to continue on with my usual morning things and finish up.  Took an ibuprofen so hopefully the headache will go away.  NOT the way to start day one of vacation!

Yesterday was so frustrating... and I ended up telling my boss - the male one - that he FAILED the girlfriend test.  I can't remember how much I had shared about the May 20-June 3 meeting fiasco and the email being on the president's calendar versus a meeting notice on here, but it is finally resolved by 4:30PM yesterday that it will remain on June 3rd.  And you are welcome.  I had 3-4 more paragraphs of what had happened and my anger and frustration at the lack of responsibility of others to respond to emails and READ them before responding.  I erased them.  Oh, my boss failing the Girlfriend test?  I had reached out to him to vent - and he was more concerned with sharing his frustration over a meeting.  Big fail.  LOL  

My suitcase is nearly packed and ready to go.  We're going to get 4th generation photos done this morning before heading out so I need to make sure my hair is fixed and makeup on.  LOL  Not that it changes me in any way.  I do hope the photos turn out well.  I need to quit being so self-conscious about how I look and just be me in photos.  I saw something recently that has made me rethink about digital photos.  I know I have lost a lot of photos (and I know I have a lot of photos on thumb drives) over the years.  I also have let my children go through numerous photos and take what photos they want.  I am happy to let them have whatever they want.  But, I have tons of loose photos in a couple boxes, and I have several on my phone.  I'm going to buy some more albums and have some of these printed.  Some I'll throw away (scenery, backs of heads, etc), but I am going to make it a project to print my photos and put in albums.  Why?  

Because that is how the memory keeps going.  As my phone fills up with photos, I have started deleting some.  My dropbox keeps telling me it's full.  Last time I think I had over 7K photos, it told me.  Now that also includes recipes and documents, etc.  But still.  And I can never find the one photo I want to find in a quick manner.  No, I don't know how to do the folders and I don't want to learn.  So I've decided the next time Walgreens has 50% off photo printing, I'm going to do a couple hundred at a time and print and then eventually put in albums.  Nothing creative and fancy.  But so that when I'm gone, people can SEE the photos and take them if they want.  I lose my phone - the photos are gone unless they are backed up - and I don't mess with that either.  I'm a simple girl, and I like it that way.  I miss grabbing a photo album and just skimming through photos that brought me joy.  Perhaps I need to look into Shutterfly.  My granddaughter surprised us with a book of her wedding photos she had printed shortly after she married a few years ago and it is a treasure for me.  I can pick it up and look at it any time I want.  Perhaps I ought to look at that.  Just select the ones of a certain time and have that printed.  I'm done getting three copies for my kids so all have.  They don't want 'my' memories.  So I will make one copy and then they can decide who gets it.  And life goes on.  What if a great-grandchild would want an old photo of me - as we all age and move on, things are not as important and things get thrown away and deleted - what if there are none to be found?  What if YOUR grandchild wanted YOUR photo years from now.... would they be able to find one?  That one printed copy may be all they can find.  

I know.  My thoughts are all over the place this morning.  My heart is in a longing mode this morning.  So many things I want to do to leave a legacy for my children and their children and their children... how can I do that....

I can bless them.  Just like the Blessing... even now I can bless them for generations to come.

"May the Lord bless you and protect you.  May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you His favor and give you His peace." (NLT)  Numbers 6:24-26

Life is fleeting.  All that lasts is the legacy you leave behind.  Make memories.  Ones that can be passed on and treasured.

Got to get busy this morning - I'm on vacation!

Blessings!

It was a good evening; a very good evening!

 Yesterday was kind of quiet, which is really nice to have after have a rough week of not feeling well, crazy situations with meetings, just plain being tired.  Hubby wanted to take me to breakfast yesterday morning (although I told him I found it interesting that I didn't feel I could go to church after my week of being sick, but could obviously go to breakfast....) so we did.  It was a nice breakfast.  Didn't do much after breakfast.... went to Big Lots and picked up a few things that 'we just had to have'.  (In other words, didn't really need, but thought we might 'sometime'.  And snacks for hubby while I'm gone.  And I had to have a small package of oreos for me.  And a small box of Cheezits.  

Did you see that video on facebook of the woman who would sniff an oreo and stuff a piece of broccoli in her mouth?  I always think of that when I see broccoli or oreos.  It was really funny.   

We had the leftover chicken, mashed potatoes and corn for dinner last night since we weren't hungry for lunch.  Afterwards we decided to watch Jentezen Franklin from You Tube since we didn't watch him yesteday morning.  He was on fire yesterday.  And he just stated that more preachers need to be preaching the Word of God from the Bible and not giving '7 steps to being a good friend' (or something like that).  Meaning, quit covering up the truth with 'goody' stuff and put the truth out there!  "The BIBLE says...." is what Billy Graham always said.... and Jentezen was holding up his Bible and saying 'The BIBLE says...".  Powerful, powerful service!  The kind I 'enjoy' hearing.  It doesn't matter what I feel about something, or what I think of this or that.... if the BIBLE says..... then that is to be my response.    

They also have a monthly praise and worship service in the evenings at Free Chapel and I went ahead and clicked to watch it after the service.  Wow.  What a worship service!  For the first time in a long time, I felt refreshed and renewed in worship.  Some of you may not understand that feeling.  I wish you did.  I wish you experience it when you worship.  Total abandonment of oneself in worship.  No, I didn't get up and dance and all that, but fell to my knees with lifted hands in worship.  Oh the enemy kept trying to mess with my mind... "you know hubby is watching you" (SO WHAT??!!)  The enemy is always trying to make me self-counscious during worship.  But I was able to close my mind to him last night and just worship Jesus.  What a precious, precious time of praying for my family, my children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren - and even for those beyond that.  Each one I claimed for the Lord.  Oh that all would open their eyes to His goodness, His faithfulness, His love, and turn their hearts to Him!  

I didn't want the time to end.  Worship was so sweet, so comforting, so loving, so wonderful.  I can sit here even now and close my eyes and remember the sweetness of the evening.  Oh that each one of you could experience the joy of serving the Lord and only Him.  Not tha I am perfect by any means, in worship, or in life.  I'm not.  But I have a Savior, just as you do, who loves me so much that when I confess my sins to Him, He is faithful and just to forgive me my sins, and cleanse me from all unrighteousness.  My righteousness if found in Him alone.

When I went to bed shortly after worship, I slept the best I have slept in a long, long time.  I awoke at 2:30AM, glanced at the clock, went right back to sleep and slept until 4AM this morning.  I actually feel rested and (almost) ready to start the day.  I am working today and it will prove to be a busy day, for sure.  To start off with, it's 'timecard Monday' so I need to get those done.  Then I have that June 3rd/May 20th meeting to get taken care of today.  Hopefully the executive assistant of the president finally responded to my email.  If not, I will be texting her to read her email from me from 8:30AM last Friday morning.  Got to get that taken care of.  Other than that, it is just tying up loose ends so that I can be gone 4 days without my laptop.  I get my work emails on my phone so I can periodically check if something should come up, but there isn't anything I can do because I am not taking my work laptop with me.  This is vacation.  That means fun.  That means hanging out with those I love and they will have my full attention.

I need to start week two of my Bible study today - not sure if I will have time to this morning before I start work, as I really want to jump on the computer and get things done.  Unfortunately, my timing isn't always THIER timing when it comes to timecards.  I'd like to get on and say by 8AM have all your timecards approved (I'm usually the 2nd approval).  But THEIR bosses have given them until 11AM.  Last week I was down to one person so I just emailed her and asked her to go in and approve so that I could finish up and quit checking.  It can get time consuming at times.  So I may as well take the half hour before me and work on my lesson.  I thought the first week was thought provoking, and I have already mentioned how I struggled to answer honestly some of the questions from Day 5.  I talked with my little sister yeserday as we were to discuss the summary of the week - and she hadn't completed it.  Why?  Day 5 had 'personal questions' that she struggled with, and after the first 8 questions (out of 18), she quit.  Said she didn't want to do the study (that is what I 'heard', may not be exactly what she said).  So we talked about it and I explained that day 5 was a personal reflection for our own review.  We do NOT share our responses to that.  But if she looked beyond those questions to the summary of the week, where there are general questions about the study to discuss - THAT is what we would choose from to share with each other.  That made a difference; she hadn't looked any further.  So, we probably will be discussing week one and week two next weekend for we won't talk that much this week.  

And isn't that what we sometimes do?  If we don't like something the Bible says, we choose to close the Bible and not read any further?  If we don't like what someone says to us, we turn it off in our minds, and not listen?  We don't like the way a preacher preaches (because it steps on our toes?) so we quit going.  The Bible isn't to entertain us.  It is to instruct us on how to live.  Yes, it was written centuries ago - but it still applies today!  Our conscience convicts us of things we know we shouldn't do... so we turn it off so that we can do what we want.  Who says you have to go to church anyway, we remark when we don't want to go.  "I can still be a Christian and not go to church."  How many times have we heard that?!   

I gave each of my children a Bible a couple years ago.  I don't think any of them have even taken it out of the box - or if they have - have looked to read it.  I wish I had given them the Bible I am reading now for it has helped me a lot.  I've mentioned before how I enjoy reading different study Bibles as a pastor's interpretation is sometimes different from others.  I gave them each a Jentezen Franklin Legacy Bible - and it has years of sermons in it that he gave (brief ones) over the years.  Some are really good.  I've read through that Bible and have it marked up.  Loved reading the sermons.  But it isn't a STUDY Bible.  Meaning, there are no notes at the bottom that can help one understand what the scripture is saying.  I am currently using David Jeremiah's NJKV Study Bible.  His interpretations of scripture have helped me a lot in understanding a deeper meaning of the scripture as I read it.  I currently read a chapter, then read the study notes, and any 'insights' he has.  I also enjoy the book summary in front of each book.  I just started Romans yesterday (reading through the New Testament first, then will go back to Genesis and start again there.  I boughht one for hubby too and he has commented how much more he gets out of it.  I wish I had bought these for my children, because of the study notes.  But I love the messages in the Legacy Bible too.  Bottom line, the Bible has so much history in it and through interpretations of those who know much more than I, I am able to form my own opinions, my own interpretation.  It opens our minds to what God is saying to us!  And His Word never changes.  Oh that they would all love God's Word like I do!   I have one Bible that belonged to my dad.. it's called a 'Teacher's Bible' and gives the pronnouciations of the names...I'm still undecided whom I will pass that on to.  I want to read it myself in its entirety before I pass it on.  Perhaps once I retire and have more time.  I want whoever it goes to, to treasure it as I do.  Not only because it is a Bible, but it belonged to my dad.  

I guess I need to quit sharing and prepare my mind for the day's work.  I need to pack too!  Having lunch with my daughter today to go over things I want or need to take.  Still need to get my hiking boots down off the shelf.  For this reason I asked for them for Christmas (besides, there wasn't anything I needed, and it was something specific hubby could buy for me).  Last day of work before vacation; hopefully I can get off the computer at my usually sign-off time and be done with it for the rest of the week.  Pray for our protection and travel mercies as we travel to and from, please.

I John 5:14-15 (NKJV):  "Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything  according to His will, He hears us.  And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him."

Blessings!

Reminded again of God's love for us.

 Romans 8:31 (NKJV)  "What then shall we say to these things?  If God is for us, who can be against us?"

Have you ever thought about how much God really does love you?  Granted, sometimes we go through things in life (some by our own responses, some by others) that make us wonder if that could possible be true.  I have never doubted God's love for me, even when I wasn't following Him.  Even when I decide to do things my own way, I know that I know that I know - that God loves me.  And not only THAT, I know that God is always FOR me, just as He is for you.

How do I know this?  It's just one of those things that you become confident in as you learn into Him to know Him.  It's one of those things you learn about Him as you read His Word that tells you all about His love for you.  You DID know that the Bible is really God's love letter to this hurting world, didn't you?  He is truly a good, good Father.  You can completely trust Him, no matter what you are going through.

Right now my biggest thing is this complication, or whatever it is, from breathing those fumes last  weekend from the cleaning products.  I am still having reactions, and it's been a week today that we left.  Or perhaps it caused other things to come to light.  I'm wondering if I have developed esophagus issues, sinus issues, or even gallbladder issues ... don't know how all that can be related, but my continued coughing, blowing my nose has made my esophagus irritated, as well as my sinus area.  But the worst part is that I still will have episodes of throwing up unexpectedly (last night, sitting there watching a movie - took a sip of tonic water and voila - all over me) or being awakened in the middle of the night with raw bile in my mouth and throat to where it burns.  Probably too much information to share on here.  I'm wondering if it is my gallbladder acting up again after 12 years of first rearing it's head.  I have prayed that God will get me through this next week as I leave for Jailbreak on Tuesday.  In fact, on Monday, I plan to call my doctor's office and get an appointment set up for the followihg week.  I can always cancel if everything goes well this week, but I feel like I need to share with him what has happened since that weekend.  This stuff isn't normal.

I hear hubby still coughing as well, so am going to suggest he try to get in to his doctor and share with him a weekend of breathing these fumes (we did frequently open the balcony door and air it out, even went outside to breathe... ) and Saturday neither of us smelled any fumes - but we could have been used to it by then.  I was too sick - and sleeping all day Saturday to even notice.  It's just really weird how this is still affecting us.

I sat at the table and finished working on my week one Bible study yesterday.  I felt really good after getting into it and completing the tasks.  There were 18 questions I needed to work on for day 5 and they were questions I wanted to be honest with myself about.  I didn't want to just respond 'yes' or 'no' with the thought of 'yeah, I know that is what I should be' or 'I used to be that way'.  I wanted to look at the question from 'today'.  Where am I 'today' with that question.  Some of them were hard to write the responses to.    How would you respond to this question?

* Am I more concerned with what God thinks about my life than what ohers think? (Matthew 10:28: "And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul.  But rather fear Him who is able to destroy both body and soul in hell.")

or even one of these....

* The prophet Hosea was sent to the nation of Israel.  They had turned away from God and replaced Him with other things.  What are some ways that Christians today replace God with other things?

* Is there someone you know or have heard about who has unselfishly loved another person, even though that person was not worthy of it?  How does this real-life example help you understand God's love for His wayward children?

Perhaps something to kindle your thoughts this morning and turn them towards our God who loves you so much.

Today is planned to be a quiet day.  With unexpectedly having my 'issue' last night, I asked hubby that I stay home (as he will) from church.  I definitely don't want to start coughing and something like that happen and I have no control over it.  Give it another week and let's see how my body is.  He agreed.  Depending on what hubby wants to watch, I just might watch one of the DVDs my daughter bought for me at an estate sale yesterday and dropped off.  The box of DVD's contain 50 old musicals from as far back as 1936 (black and white, I'm sure!) with Fred Astair, Frank Sinatra, and many others.  It would be fun to watch them.  Haven't watched any old movies in years.... watching the old musicals will be very entertaining to me.  Several months ago I bought a travel DVD player - which I've never used - so now I have an opportunity to watch.  I can plug in my headset, and hubby can watch his shows on TV with his headset (best purchase I have ever made) and we can still be in the same room.  Win-Win - right?

And yeah, I did end up cooking breakfast yesterday - but we didn't go out later.  We both forgot about lunch, having a snack midday, but I picked up fried chicken at Frys (which was disappointing as the skin was too salty) and added mashed potatoes and corn to it for dinner.  Guess what is for lunch today.  I may just fix us a bowl of oatmeal for breakfast this morning.  Filling and good.

So what are your plans for today?  Take some time to think about the goodness of God in your life, even if you don't acknowledge Him.  Everyone healthy?  Thank God.  Working?  God is good.  No need for anything?  God is faithful.  You woke up this morning?  Ahhhh.... see how good God is?  No matter what you do today; no matter what goes on today; no matter where you are in life..... just pause, and turn your thoughts to the One who will always be on your side.  And say "Thanks, Lord".   Grateful.

Blessings!