and I woke up at 11:55PM thinking about my daughter. Something just isn't right and I can't put my finger on it. Am going to talk with my nurse boss or my doctor friend some time today and hope to get some answers. When I visited my daughter last night, she was 'out of it'. When I woke late last night, the difference between her second day in the hospital versus this day - is not good at all. The second day she was talkative, she was eating and drinking her fluids. Monday she was less alert, but she ate most of her dinner. Wednesday night she ate nearly all of her dinner. Last night, a few sips of soup and french fries was about it. She was staring into space; she was almost in a catonic state. My oldest son was visiting her; my SIL was there. We arrived during the meal. It was the worst I have seen her. She's on oxygen because they have her so drugged she isn't breathing deep. Her blood pressure is too high; her sugar levels went from 164 to 234 overnight - and I do not think she is eating anything she shouldn't. I am scared.... I will admit.... that something else happened in that fall and they haven't caught it; haven't thought about it. Even though there was not a head wound, could she have hit her head and have a blood bleed? Something is going on that shouldn't be and I'm afraid it will not be caught..... That fear kept me praying for over an hour during the night. The grandson flew in last night and was going to spend the night with her. I'm glad, but he and his dad will be leaving some time today to head to NM.
I'm glad the grandson flew in to see his mom, and I hope that revives her. I'm afraid it won't though. We are supposed to be able to trust the doctors, but they don't 'know' her. Which makes me wonder if her doctor has been notified - not that he would do anything while she is in the hospital. If he has privileges there, he could see her records and follow her, I think. I feel this is a crucial time and although they are still talking rehab, I don't think she is ready to go - not because of being sore as she hasn't the chance to feel soreness and get the strength built back into her legs. She is given way too many drugs for pain, even when not asked. All of this is just my observation and my opinion - but it scares me that..... I've heard too many stories and I don't want the next one to be ours.
So I pray. And I continue to pray. I will enlist others to pray as well. Yes, I'm that concerned about her. I already have people praying for my son, but he is up and moving and doing what he can at this time. Right now other people are in control of my daughter and I don't think they know what they are doing - they are just 'doing their job' and administrating drugs when 'time' versus asking if it is needed. Lord HELP, HELP HELP!
Yesterday was a busy day - my male boss kept me so busy and I still have not made his reservations to fly to a conference in April, I think it is. And I haven't figured out the board meetings yet for 2026. Yeah, I'm way behind. I don't see it getting done today either as I will be making another long trip down to Mesa for the department 'Holiday' party. I made salsa and a cheeseball to put with breads and cookies to take to my male boss for Christmas and one of his Sr Directors that I support. I have a white elephant gift (a hot dog cooker) although I don't like to participate in those. Although the last two years I was able to get what I wanted - the cast iron 9x13 pan and the Victorian Swiss Knife. I hope I get a good one this year as well. Food is 'catered' and is meatloaf or lasagna. Side dishes also, of course. I really do not want to go, but I need to, So it's an hour drive down and at least an hour back, unless I hit traffic right. So glad I do not have to drive down there on a daily basis. One more trip down next week on Thursday for the Company 'Holiday' Party and then I can stay home. I think I will charge mileage for today - it is a company function; as is next week. I wonder if I can get it to 'fly'. Will talk with my boss to see. That helps with gas money.
After my training, after work, which I ended up bailing on about 5 minutes early - just wasn't into the HIIT workout last night. I did three sets and Morgan was going to give me another one when I told her I was bailing. She asked "are you sure?" and I paused and said "yes". I am not 'into it and my mind is on family' so we stopped five minutes early. She was grateful to be able to sit down for a few minutes before her next client. Her baby will be here by the end of next week if not before; at least that is the 'plan'. And she is on her feet all day long working clients. That's a tough job.
Left training to visit my daughter and we were there until about 6:30PM I think. She was out of it and I still had things to put together for today. Am I repeating myself? I'm so distracted right now. My heart wants to be with my children, and work - and hubby - interferes. I have been so surprised hubby did not dare tell me not to visit my daughter at night. But I have, and he hasn't, other than asking me to take the taser, nagged me. I will go as much as I can. Sue tells me to do whatever I need to do and let work go. But there hasn't been a reason as of yet that I need to be there. If need be, tomorrow I can take my laptop and work from the hospital - smaller screen off the laptop, but I can work and schedule meetings.
Isaiah 7:15 (NKJV): The Lord Himself will give you a sign: Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a Son, and shall call His name Immanuel.
I am reminded as I read this verse that the name Immanuel means "God with us". It is a reminder to me that in all of this, all my concerns for my daughter and for my son(s), God is with me and with them in the middle of all of it. He knows what is going on; He knows what is going to happen. Our God created each one in His image; He is in control of every aspect of their lives. He knows exactly what is going on - not even the doctors know as much as He does.
And I have to trust in that. I trust in the name of Jesus. And I run to Him and bring my children's names before Him, seeking Him, begging Him, crying out to Him, that He will hear, and that He will answer the way I want Him to answer. I don't understand all that is happening. I'm not a medical person in that sense. But I know what I see, and when God wakes me up to pray in the middle of the night, something is going on that I need to pound on heaven's door for. And pound I shall.
I would trade places with any of my children and grandchildren in whatever they are going through. It hurts to see them unable to do what they want to do. Lord Jesus, increase my faith, help me to believe even more than I do. You can do ALL things, for nothing is impossible for You. Your arm is not short; and I ask You reach down and bring total and complete healing to my children. Heal and Restore them, O God. Into Your hands, Lord, bring Hope, bring Healing.
Lord, Help.
Blessings!
