It's amazing how some people will look at today - and what 'it' is. It's Easter, of course, and we Christians celebrate it as the day that Jesus rose from the dead. This is why we live the way we do; why we worship the way we do; the reason we seek after God the way we do. Jesus died so that we may live with Him eternally. It's not 'just another Sunday'. Many people do Easter dinners, and you are not alone in that; we do that as well - or attend, as I will be doing later. We have Easter egg hunts for the little ones. Some go to church; some watch a service on TV; some don't do anything 'religious'.
I think today we are falling in the middle of it all. Somewhat. I had encouraged hubby to go to church because I am still coughing some, and don't want to get into a hacking cough in the middle of the service. But, alas, Friday hubby started coughing, and it sounds just like I did when all this started a week ago. And, because it is on the tail end of my respiratory issues, I am going to assume that he caught it from me. I've given him Allegra, as Dr. Mark told me to take one a day (I guess to help dry up the mucus?), Musinex DM (although it didn't help me, it may help him), and I had a talk with him this morning.
Today we are to go t my youngest son's for spaghetti Easter dinner. I made my spaghetti sauce yesterday - 3 batches because I wanted to be sure there was plenty to freeze for another time. It seems to be missing something, but I haven't figured out what yet, but maybe with it setting overnight in the refrigerator and I'll put it on in a few to start heating back up, it will be blended together better. Anyway, it dawned on me this morning that if hubby caught this respiratory thing that I've had and is coughing, perhaps he ought not to go, in case it is contagious. I didn't think it was, but he is coughing like I was.
So I shared with him this morning about that thought. He didn't like it at first. He really wanted to go (and he loves spaghetti). I told him it was up to him, but I really didn't want the babies getting sick (although he could stay away from them). A little bit ago he came in and said that he agrees with me, that he won't go because he doesn't want the babies getting sick, but could I bring him home a bowl of spaghetti? LOL (pause - put the spaghetti sauce on to heat up). As I walked back, hubby asked when did I think I was going to leave for the lunch. Now mind you, it is now 9:30AM. Lunch is as 12-ishPM. Is it even important as to when I leave? I told him it would probably be around 11:30AM sure I had the 'main part' of the meal there in time.
I simply must quit talking about things I make that have turned out exceptionally well. It seems when I'm asked to bring it (no matter what it is), I seem to mess it up somehow and it isn't near as good as I remember it being. My spaghetti sauce as well. Sigh. Hopefully, today it will be at least edible. I did keep a bag out to freeze for my oldest to have if he wants.
I started a new devotional today that on day one has exactly expressed where my heart longs to be - and that is totally unexpected. I didn't expect that from this book; just figured it was a typical 'women's devotional'. It's a book from the Proverbs 31 Ministries. I haven't read any of them before, but this one I bought at the conference a couple weeks ago. I had put it aside to give away (I love finding good books to pass on to my friends; sadly, none of my family will read them) but this morning, really wanting something 'different' to touch me in a new way, I decided that I should also read it. And I'm glad I did.
I want it to be evident that I'm a girl who spends time with Jesus and that He's working on me. ~~ Lysa TerKeurst.
That line really spoke to me this morning, for although you know that I do spend time with Jesus every morning, I am sure that it isn't always evident. Not evident in what I write in here; not evident in daily conversation with hubby, and sometimes not even with others. I feel like I have lost my joy and I need to find it again. Does that make sense? I am desiring to 'dive deeper' into Jesus and find in Him my joy and my passion for Him. I've missed feeling His presence with me all the time. I miss His nudging to pause and spend time with Him. It's not that I've sinned, or anything like that..... but that I have allowed pleasing others and keeping the peace and distractions .... to overshadow my desire to spend time with Him. I own it. It is me that has turned my face away.
He's still there. He is still waiting for me to give Him my undivided attention. Sometimes life is hard and the distractions are too much to resist. My phone has been dinging all morning with Easter greetings - and many have me on this 'link' with a bunch of others and as each one responds, of course I get another 'ding'. I have chosen NOT to respond on it. I'll send something to my brother and sister later - the time of day is not important. It's not sending the beautiful pictures of 'He is Risen!' that we love to send. It's knowing that He is the reason that we even 'celebrate' this day - it's His choice to give up His own life in heaven, to come to earth as human, to live in the same struggles every single one of us have, to choose rightly to follow His Father in life choices, to go as far as the cross, to die, to be buried..... and to rise again this day.... and He did it for you and for me, that we may be His eternally. What a sacrifice for us. Are we worth it?
Lord Jesus, may nothing separate me from You today. Teach me how to block these distractions of the world and to choose only Your way today so each step will lead me closer to You. Help me walk by Your Word and not my feelings.
Help me to keep my heart pure and undivided. Keep my own careless thoughts, words, and actions away; keep me from being focused upon MY wants, MY thoughts, MY desires on how I think things should be; how they should fall into place.
Help me, Jesus, to embrace what ever comes my way and look at it as an opportunity to be Your hands and feet.... rather than a personal inconvenience. Help me to rest in the truth that Your love is so great for me.
You know I fall short in many ways, and I mess up all the time. But right now, Jesus, I consciously tuck Your whisper of absolute love for me into the deepest part of my heart. I know Your love for me isn't based on what I do, that you love me in spite of the things I have done, and will do - all my shortcomings. You are so amazing, Jesus! And even more amazing is that you, my Savior, my Lord, wants to spend time with me.
Help me to remember, Jesus, what a gift it is to sit at your feet and just be with you. I love you with all my being. I lay everything down, to just be with you. In Your precious name, Amen.
