I think I mentioned yesterday I wasn't sure if I was going to church physically or not. Well, I didn't go. I just didn't feel like listening to loud music.... and I'm glad I didn't go. I did watch it on my kindle, well, a part of the service, anyway. I was quiet yesterday morning. I enjoyed being alone. I didn't do any busy work, other than getting on my work computer and going through the 63 emails I had that came in on Friday. Got work to do today.
But I'm glad I stayed home. By the time the service had ended and I knew hubby would be on his way home, the lightening bolts started again and I headed for the tylenol to stop them. I had just taken them when hubby got home and I heated up lunch. Sometimes I think he'd starve if I didn't fix him a meal. I was feeling pretty resentful at dinner time, but I'm jumping ahead. If I have a chance today, I plan to call my doctor's office and see if I can get in.... she can't do anything because it isn't visible, it isn't something that one can determine how to fix just by looking at me. But something is wrong when I get get these lightening bolts flashing and losing my vision. I may set it a month out and continue to track when I get these and what happens. This was my 4th or 5th one within the past three months - but what bothers me is that I got these last two in the past two days. Oh well. Not going to sit here and think about it....
It was a quiet day; hubby had to watch the baseball game, but with the score so much in the other teams favor, a movie was opted for. We ended up watching 3 movies, I think. Whatever. I sat and crochet'd and got a total of 4 wash cloths completed yesterday.
Today is timecard Monday - which by now you know I don't have any trouble getting them done since everyone is salaried. The good part? We get paid on Thursday! Good thing - I got one of the bills from my surgery - the outpatient surgery clinic - my cost - I think for both surgeries, is over $800. I'm grateful the money is in the bank to pay it. I am not sure if I owe any more to my eye doctor or not - I've already paid him over $800, which they collected beforehand. I'd do it again; my vision is so much better. I just have to wear reading glasses more often. I do have a prescription so may run to Sam's Club and see how inexpensive they are. I may just take a pair of glasses and have them change out the lens. But I want a light pair; I can't stand having something 'there' that I feel constantly. That's why I usually don't wear glasses! Those of you who wear glasses understand what I'm saying. Maybe I will try wire ones.... will see.
Hebrews 11:6 (NKJV): "But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him."
Faith has been one of my highest spiritual gifts, I think. I believe that God can do anything ... He may not always give me what I ask for, even if I believe He will. He sees the future, I do not. He knows that we do not always ask aright. I know I don't, and I'm pretty sure you don't. I believed that He would answer my prayer and heal some people I've prayed for in the past. He didn't. I can't pretend to understand why He didn't answer my prayers the way I wanted Him to. BUT, I know He is God and I am not. His ways are always better than mine, even when I don't understand.
Whether He answers my prayers or not, I will still believe in Him. Why? Because my life is His and I choose to be obedient to Him in ALL things. Pastor Steve's birthday is today and as I read his post this morning, I am reminded of how much God loves us and is in control of our world today - whether it seems to be chaotic or not. I'm copying and pasting it below - and I know he doesn't care.....
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May 1, 2023
The Mirror of God's Word - "Reflections"
When people live to be very old, let them rejoice in every day of life." - Ecclesiastes 11:8a (NLT)
Today is my birthday. I thought I'd share some lessons I've learned on the journey. Some of them are wonderful insights that God has given me that have spared me much sorrow. Others are insights that God has given me after I experienced much sorrow. I hope they'll be of help to you.
It's better to be open-hearted than hard-headed. Stubborn is sometimes a nice way of saying "stupid."
You can't fix people. You can only offer guidance and hope they have the sense to seek God and allow Him to fix them.
Prayer is not telling God how to run His universe. It is humbling yourself before God and asking Him to run yours.
Asking for forgiveness when you've hurt someone is a wonderful thing to do. Having the self-control not to hurt them in the first place is a better thing to do.
Following your heart isnot always a great idea. If your heart is not in the right place with God, it can lead you where you don't want to be.
One of the most powerful gifts we have is to control the story we tell ourselves about other people. When we don't know why people act the way they do, telling ourselvse a good story rather than a bad one will change everything.
If I'm going to walk faithfully with God, I have to trust Him. That means trusting Him even when I have no earthly idea why things are the way they are. TheTrinity is not a Quartet.
I used to pray for God to fill our sanctuary so our church would grow big. I now pray for God to fill our War Room and our Prayer Closets so our church will change lives.
Growing old and dying is not scary. Growing old and not having made a difference is. Life is lived best when we make peace with our past and trust God with our future. That allows us to simply live one day at a time.
Love everyone - the good, the bad, and the ugly. It won't make them better people or more attractive, but it will make YOU that way!
That's God's Word for you today.
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Blessings!
