Did I really turn it on?

 In the middle of the night?  Did I?  Or did hubby turn it on when he turned down the bed and I forgot to turn it off?  What am I talking about?  A sleep disrupter!! I have a touch lamp on my nightstand.  Hubby sometimes turns it on when he turns down the bed, but I don't remember if it was on or not when we went to bed. Or, did I turn it on?  I don't know - but at 2:15a this morning, I was awakened by a light shining through my eyelids.  I had been in a deep sleep until that moment.  Of course I reached out and touched it off, but geez, it disrupted my sleep and I struggled to get back into a deep sleep after that.  So, do I let that make me be grumpy this morning - or just tired?  Hmmmm  It may be a very long day today cause I didn't rest after that.

I have two tests scheduled for this afternoon that I will be gone for a couple hours. At least it is close by.  Have my bone density which will show the density of my bones.  Duh.  What aggravates me is that two years ago it showed my bone density as going down - after being on Fosamax for two years.  I am hoping it is at least the same or better this time since I have been doing a lot of strength training, but I still refuse to take the Fosamax.  I will take my chances on falling and breaking a hip bone.  What did the pioneers do, right?  They toughed it out!  If I fall and break a hip - God will either take care of me, or take me home - I'm in His hands, not in man's medicine.  You know how they always say an older person breaks a hip and then ends up dying.  Well, my mama had a broken ankle!  Enough said.  I'll trust God for when a bone breaks and when I die.  Not leaving it up to man! So there!  (see what happens when I don't get a good night's sleep?  I get grumpy!) LOL

The other test is the yearly mammogram.  I still remember when Dr. Hollis sent me to one place and they squeezed so hard it brought tears to my eyes - and when I told him about it, he refused to send me there any more.  Or any of his patients. He said there is no reason to be squeezed so hard.  Never did go back there.  Of course now I have to go to a specified place because of my insurance, but that's ok.  I've been there before and they are good.  At least both tests are at the same place and I can get both done today and be done with them. Bone Density for two years, mammogram for one.

I did nothing last night.  Hubby left the TV off so I could read, but, didn't even do that.  I got one of my ocular migraines and it was one of the worst ones I've had and it lasted longer.  I could see my phone, but when I tried to read, several words were blacked out.  But, they say no cure, and it's just something that happens.  I don't agree.  I've had a headache for two days between my eyes; I think I may need to ask for a test - will see if I get any more like that.  I go back to Dr. Mark in January, but if I get a couple more ocular migraines like that I may go back and ask for a referral.  

I know my little sister has in the past, I don't know if she still does, had severe migraines (I used to but haven't had since I was prayed over years ago) which literally disable her.  She said her testing showed she has a cyst between the eyes and when it fills up with fluid, the headache comes on - and when the cyst bursts, the headache goes away.  Something a doctor told her.  She could have surgery to remove the cyst, but she didn't want a scar between the eyes.  Migraine versus scar.... I'm sorry, I'll take the scar, thank you very much.  I don't think that is my issue; I may not even have one.  I just get a dull headache and the ocular migraine usually lasts 20-30 minutes and then is gone.  Oh well.  I just keep living life.

I am so lazy at getting this room straightened up and other things done (I have the dining room table loaded with my diamond art projects) - I keep thinking about taking tomorrow off to work on everything.   I am taking Monday off.  Last full day my daughter will be in town - and it will be her 25th BMT Birthday.  They will head back home Tuesday morning.  I'll check in the morning when they get on the road and then will be able to determine more when they will be in town.  And I'm rambling. As usual.

No trainings on schedule until next Wednesday when Morgan gets back; she's taken time off to visit her brother in Kansas and they will spread her grandmother's ashes in Iowa.  I've got to get some exercising in while she is gone; don't what to lose what I've gained. I guess she and hubby had a chat yesterday and she encouraged him to just go to the rec center to work out a couple extra times a week.  So he is asking me if I can take off some time to go to the rec center with him a couple times a week.  Sigh. At least it is close and I won't be gone as long.  And I do get an hour lunch, which I usually eat at my desk or not take at all.  With these retainers, I'm certainly not snacking like I used to!  They are getting harder to get off and on. Then I have to brush my teeth before I put them back on.  I could stand to lose a pound or two anyway, right?  But the problem is, once I have them off... I try to get all my snacks in before I have to brush my teeth and put the retainers back in. LOL I sure do love food.  Which reminds me, my Tovala order should be coming in today.  It sure has made my life much easier as far as cooking.  But of course, now I'm starting to think about the money.   I could drop it to 4 meals instead of 6.  But I'm not going to the store; we aren't going out to eat as much (well, I'm not), so is it a win-win or ?? I don't know. Haven't sat down to analyze it - but I do know that it is nice to have our meals complete and all I have to do is put together and put in the oven.  It's like having a prepped meal and all you got to do is put it together and finish it.  Only I'm not doing the prepping.  Maybe if I ever retire where I can cook to my heart's content, I can do my own.  Definitely will be cutting Tovala and training out if I retire.  

I should have been born rich instead of just beautiful, right?

2 Corinthians 4:16 (NKJV):  Therefore do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.

Once you grab hold of Jesus, you find yourself thinking of what you do and how you do things.  You start to give up things you 'used to do' because you feel they are detrimental to your health and well=being, and to your family and other relationships.  You start looking for ways to change habits. You want to do better. You want to give an example of who Jesus is in your life. You change your words, you change your behavior, you feel like you are finally starting to live life.  

Sometimes, once we get these changes in places, we find ourselves looking back over I lives and what we have given up.  Our outward man has perished and in it's place, we find one that we can be proud of. Our inward person is being renewed. And when we are 'good' in our inward parts, it reflects in our outward parts.  Does that make sense?  Knowing Jesus changes you.  I don't mean knowing OF Jesus, but knowing Jesus with your heart, soul, mind and body.  When we decide to follow Jesus, our lives change; we change.

There is a movie starring Cheryl Ladd made years ago.  I forget who else is in it.  It's called "Tho None Go With Me" (I think).  We have the DVD I think.  It may be a VCR.  But anyway, it is a great movie to renew and refresh who you are in Christ.  I won't give all the details, but this woman (Cheryl Ladd) has to make a decision.  She made the right one, although it was one she didn't want to make.  She often reflected on the words someone had told her - 'Tho none go with me, still I will follow Jesus'.  There is a song as well, saying that, I believe.  Not going to look it up now cause I'm already out of time!  Why does time fly when I'm trying to put my thoughts in here?  Could you imagine me writing a book (which was always my dream growing up) with all the ramblings I do?  LOL Now THAT would be a best-seller, right?

And with that, I need to get off here and get in the shower.  No lotions or deodorant today for certain parts of the body.  Wear no metal pieces on clothes.  All these things for just two tests. But - gotta do it.

Have an amazing day and reflect on who you are in Christ.  Give Him all the praise for a changed life, a life worthy to follow Him.  You are loved.

Blessings!