My Great Love Story

We watched another movie last night which was 'odd', yet I was able to follow the path - going from what 'was' to what 'is'.  It was a story of love, yet lost.   Before we watched it, I had read an email from my little sister who commented after reading my blog, that like my granddaughter, she felt I should write a book.  Of course I laughed at that although that has been a dream of mine since I was a little girl.

So what happens?  During the night I wake up and begin thinking about the movie, and about my life.  I decided, in my sleepiness, that perhaps I would write a book and that the title would be 'My Great Love Story'.  I began thinking back as far as I could remember, and what I would want to tell in the story, discarding many things.  The one consistent thought that kept coming to me throughout my entire life, is God's love for me.

I smiled as I thought about how God has interwoven the threads of my life into a tapestry of beauty.  Not of me, of course, but my life before Him.  Yes, it has a lot of stretched threads where I have chosen to go my own way, but the consistent thing is His love is woven throughout the tapestry, even in those difficult times.  I remember a story.....

As I  faced my Maker at the last judgment, I knelt before the Lord along with all the other souls. Before each of us laid our lives like the squares of a quilt in many piles; an angel sat before each of  us sewing our quilt squares together into a tapestry that is our  life. But as my angel took each piece of cloth off the pile, I noticed how ragged and empty each of my squares was. They were filled with giant holes. Each square was labeled with a part of my life that had been difficult, the challenges and temptations I was faced with in every day life. I saw hardships that I endured,  which were the largest holes of all. I glanced around me. Nobody else had such squares. Other than a tiny hole here and there, the other tapestries were filled with rich color and the bright hues of  worldly fortune.  I gazed upon my own life and was disheartened. 

My angel was sewing the ragged pieces of cloth together, threadbare and empty, like binding air. Finally the time came when each life was to be displayed, held up to the light, the scrutiny of truth. The others rose; each in turn, holding up their tapestries. So filled their lives had been! My angel looked upon me, and nodded for me to rise. 

My gaze dropped to the ground in shame. I hadn't had all the earthly fortunes. I had love in my life, and laughter. But there had also been trials of illness, and wealth, and false accusations that took from me my world, as I knew it. I had to start over many times. I often struggled with the temptation to quit, only to somehow muster the strength to pick up and begin again. I spent many nights on my knees in  prayer, asking for help and guidance in my life. I had often been held up to ridicule, which I endured painfully, each time offering it up to the Father in hopes that I would not melt within my skin beneath the judgmental  gaze of those who unfairly judged me. 

And now, I  had to face the truth. My life was what it was, and I had to accept it for what it  was. 

I rose and slowly lifted the combined squares of my life to the light. An awe-filled gasp filled the air. I gazed around at the others who stared at me with wide eyes. Then, I looked upon the tapestry before me. Light flooded the many holes, creating an image, the face of Christ. Then our Lord stood before me, with warmth and love in His eyes. He said, 'Every time you gave over your life to Me, it became My life, My hardships, and My struggles. Each point of light in your life is when you stepped aside and let Me shine through, until there was more of Me than there was of you.'

See, He is my great Love Story.  He has never left me, nor forsaken me.  As I run into His arms daily, He supplies all that I need, whether I realize it at the time or not.  He is Faithful to all who come to Him.

What would be your great love story?  I pray it will also be a tapestry of love, woven together by the angels and displayed for all the world to see.

Blessings!

What if....

We watched a movie last night titled 'What If''.  It is a story about a man who got a glimpse of his life had he made another choice.  A movie much like 'Family Man' that we also enjoy.

As I thought about what to share today, the 'what if' keeps coming to me.  What if.  What if. 

What if you had chosen someone else to be your spouse.  What if you had chosen to remain single.  What if you had decided to have children.  What if you decided not to have children.

What if you decided to live your life your way and ignore God and His plan for you.

What if you decided to take a job that helped financially but you didn't really like.  What if you decided to take a job that didn't pay much, but you loved it.

What if you chose to live your life surrendered to God.

What if.....  What if......

Think about it.  What would change, if anything, if you got a glimpse of what your life could/would have been like had you made the choice to do something different than what you did? 

Would you really change the important parts of your life?  Sure, we all have made wrong choices about some things, but for the really important things, would we want to change them?   I feel there are pros and cons to every decision, good and bad.  Are they bad enough that you want to change them?  Was your choice so wrong?  Or was your choice so right there is no question about where you are right now?

Each decision is yours alone to make.  The final decision is yours.  You may discuss it with someone, but right down to the line, it is your decision to make. 

If you stop and choose now to change direction, who all will it affect?  Your spouse?  Your children?  Your parents?  Your family?  The dog? 

Will it be a GOOD change?

Before you make that final decision, really think it through.  What if.....   What if....

Blessings!

Gratefulness

As I sit here at my computer, I am listening to the sound of the clock ticking in the background.  I am looking outside the window at the beauty of the sky.  I am feeling the warmth of the sun as it shines through the window upon me.  And, I think, this is good.  Silence.  Beauty. Warmth.

I love these moments that come when I can be quiet and just 'be'.  I don't have to be doing anything (although I am typing this as I process what I'm feeling and thinking), and as I pause to enjoy what I have at this moment, I realize again how blessed I am.

So many people are so busy, and even more are gearing up for the holidays to overwhelm themselves with things to do and things to buy and places to go and people to see.  But, do they just stop and allow peace to flood them.  Do they stop long enough to hear the birds singing their sweet notes.  Do they stop to gaze at the beauty around them, the sky, the flowers, the trees.  Do they stop and take a deep breath and let go of the cares they have been carrying far too long.

I'm blessed for at this moment I am 'retired'.   I have been able to have several moments where I can stop and see and hear and breathe in the goodness of God.   The thought occurs to me - how long can I drag this out?  Time to be able to just 'Be'.   I have said I want to be home through the holidays, but I probably should start looking next month.  Some days I think I need to look sooner for I'm not used to so much time available to me and I find I can get bored easily.  Not that I don't have several things I could be doing. 

Yet, I also find I have many things that I am doing that I didn't have time for when I worked.  And those, I feel, are good things.  Things like spending time with my children, my grandchildren, shopping for loved ones, planning meals and cooking, attending concerts, spending more time in my quiet time with God.  These are good things.  Things I enjoy.

I'm so grateful that I have had this time made available to me.  I feel it is a gift from God, my reward of sorts, that I can have this time to grow in Him and get my heart in tune again with my abilities to serve.  I'm limited, extremely limited, in what I can do for various reasons.  But what am I doing with the gifts He has already given me and made available to me to use?  I need to quit using my usual excuses of being too busy and focus on how I can be His servant.

What about you?  Has busyness taken over your life that whenever you are asked to serve you just can't seem to see when or how or what you can do?  Do you not realize we are called to serve?  Whether it be to serve in any capacity at a church (greeter?), to help serve (Food Bank?), be available (do I hear children, grandchildren, nieces or nephews?),  to prepare a meal (is someone in need of encouragement?), or just to listen (is someone hurting that just sitting and holding their hand is what is needed?), we all can be used. 

I think of my little sister struggling to get her life back after the fall down the stairs.  She isn't used to having someone wait upon her, she is always the one wanting to serve.  God is teaching her some things; I pray she sits back and listens.   Family can encourage her to not give up.

I think of my daughter-in-law's mother and what she is going through on a daily basis with a loved one, and the recent loss of her sister.  My heart aches for her.  I don't know if I could endure what she is experiencing.   She is living her Christian walk by serving her loved one.  Her children raise up and call her Blessed, for that is what she is.  She is an inspiration to me.  Her children encourage and love her.

I think of my neighbor who is daily put in a chair to watch TV.  After leading a very active life, in her 30's was stricken with MS and has not been able to walk in over 20 years. She has a caretaker who watches over her and serves her every need.  Her children have deserted her for they are of the world and want only what they can take from her.   We both love chocolate.  Our conversations are interesting.  She never feels sorry for herself.  She has friends who stop by occasionally and bring her things. 

I think of many friends and family members who have much going on in their lives.  Perhaps their spouses are not doing well, their own jobs are difficult, money seems to be non-existent, they feel very much alone.  I think we all have friends and family somewhere in our lives like that.   Learn to serve by being an encourager, a listener, a servant.  Be grateful that you can.   Give of what God has blessed you with.

I am grateful to God for so many things.  Sometimes He has to shake me up to get my attention in some areas, and I give Him permission to do so.  Each struggle that He allows me to go through (usually each struggle is from my own wrong choices) I grow stronger because I try to learn from my choices.   But I must go through the struggle to learn it.

I am grateful because God doesn't give up on me.  Nor does He give up on you.  No matter what you are going through, whether it is because of wrong choices, whether it is because of sickness or results of others' decisions and actions, He will never leave you nor forsake you.  Honest.  His Word says so and God does not lie.  

Think about being grateful - and thanking Him for always walking you through the valleys as you head up the next mountain.  How great is His faithfulness to us.   Share that gratefulness with others, how can you serve them today.

Blessings!

Dance While You Can....

My little sister sent me a book recently titled Dance While You Can by Lance Wubbels.   I love the things it says about living life while you can.   Just a few of my own thoughts...

What if.... some one died and you never got around to telling them how much they meant to you?  Don't live with regrets.

What if...  your child was hurt and you weren't available to comfort them?   Always be available no matter what.

What if...  you were diagnosed with a disease, and instead of turning your attention to God and others, you withheld your emotions and feelings and kept to yourself?   God doesn't want us to walk our journey alone, He has someone to walk with you.

What if...   you can fill in the blanks.... 

I'm just pondering my thoughts about the book.  It helped me remember that God doesn't want us to hide His light under a bushel - NO! - but we are to be His light wherever we are.   He wants us to love life, to live our lives to the fullest, to dance while we still can.

One of my favorite sayings in this book is:   "I will believe what my Creator has said, "For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  (Jeremiah 29:11)   I will walk forward in the certainty that my dance is secure."

I know the path before me is good for my God has said He has plans to prosper me, not harm me.  He has plans to give me hope and a future.  I look to Him for guidance in making the right choices so that I can walk where He wants me to go, and do what He wants me to do.  My life is surrendered unto Him alone.

What about you?  Are you trying to live your life on your own?  Feel like you have fallen on your face a few times?  Need to get up and brush stuff off so that you can live again?   Trust in the One who created you.  He has plans for you.

To borrow again from the book, another of my favorites:

"Dance While You Can....  I will not stand to the side and allow the music in my heart to fade away and die.  I will dance to my own life song."

Get the book - you will love it - and it makes a great gift for someone close to you. 

What is your life song?   Don't forget to dance.

Blessings!

Updates on Life

Thought perhaps I should try to do 'catch up' on the many different topics I have put on here the past month or so.  Things change as time goes by and I change as well.  Hopefully, for the better.

I 'retired' a little over two weeks ago.  Today I went back to the office for a pre-Thanksgiving lunch with a department I worked with.  I enjoyed so much getting to see everyone, laughing with them and just enjoying being with friends.  It was a good time.  Then I stopped by the building I had worked at and got to visit my co-worker, Jill, and the other executives and other friends.  It was a nice visit.  It made me feel good to be told I was 'missed'. 

As for our dilemna we have been praying and fasting over - still not sure how that is going to end.  I had a talk a week ago with the person causing me so much pain and was able to communicate what I felt.  I was told what I felt was not what was meant.  We discussed it and after 1 1/2 hours I felt much better about clearing the air between us.  Still don't agree with his concept of things, but he understands why I stand up for what I believe to be right.  I did tell him we would probably be leaving, for which it made him sad.  Interestingly enough, Tom told me this past week that he doesn't feel it is time for him to leave.  He feels that he has not accomplished what God wanted him there for.  Ok, I can go along with that.  It is interesting how the atmosphere around this one person has changed since he and I talked.  He has told me that it has been impressed on him by God that I am to do certain things - and he is to take his hands off.  Last night he showed me and another person scripture in Ezekiel about the watchman - and he feels that has become my role and he needs to listen to what I (and another person) say.   I told Tom that I will continue to go there with him, but if I choose, I may also go elsewhere as well.  He agrees.  Other than that, it is entirely up to God what we are to do. 

I made an offer to help with worship at church as it hasn't been very inspiring lately.  Wow, did I get a long letter from the worship leader on that one!  He gave me all his credentials and abilities, etc.  My thought was, if you have all that, why are you not using them?  I had no idea of what he says he can do, of what his experience is.  I haven't seen any of that yet.  But, I have stepped back on this - he is the one needing to prove himself.  He is a good man and I am sure he just needs to be more bold in bringing us into worship.  Time will tell, I guess.  Worship is important to me.  If I don't get it, I have to find it elsewhere.

My little sister FINALLY went back to the ER Monday, after I begged her.  She has a cantaloupe on her hip, she says, and a hematoma from her waist down to her knee.  She is going to the doctor today to have the staples removed and is to call me after.  She had more cat scans and MRIs while at the ER.  Her hand is still swollen, but is still told just sprained.  She still has trouble with remembering some things but it will settle down in time.  I appreciate the prayers for her behalf.

Next week my Princess Bethany is coming to stay with me and I plan to put her to work going through my craft closet.  I have so much 'stuff' and I need to decide what to keep, what to give away and just what to do with it.  I also want to get started on going through my Christmas things I've collected over the years.  Same thing - time to sort through and either keep or give away.

We will be heading up to Prescott Valley today for the funeral of a dear friend.  Evelina Kuhns attended Mountain Valley Church of God in Prescott Valley and she passed away this past week after a long, long illness.  She will be missed.

Tomorrow night my son and daughter-in-law are taking us to the Don Williams concert here in Phoenix.  I love Don Williams so Ralph got tickets for my birthday last August for me.  What a great gift! 

I guess that is about all that is going on in my life right now.   The one thing that stays consistent is my quiet time with God.   First thing each morning I go into my room for time with God.  Tom will get up shortly after and bring me coffee and water, and there I sit and read and write until I am 'done'.  I have to have my quiet time to start my day or it just doesn't come together for me.

How about you?  Are you taking time for God before you begin your busy schedule?  The holidays are coming and it won't get any easier.  I encourage you to find even five minutes that you can be quiet and focus upon Him.  You won't regret it.

Blessings!

Intercession

My little sister, Anita, whom I mentioned in a post earlier in the week, was sent home a couple days after her fall down a flight of stairs.  I talked with her after she got home and she seemed to be doing ok.   The x-rays had determined she had not broken her hip.  She had a concussion, and trouble remembering where she was when she fell (doesn't remember going to the house or the fall).  Other than scrapes and bruises, the doctors thought she was going to be ok, sore, but ok.

Tonight I received a text from her husband that she is running a high fever and a lot of pain/swelling on her hip.  Also that she is having severe headaches (she has 6 staples in her head from a concussion).  He also says her memory is spotty and she is often repeating things.  He plans to take her to the hospital in the morning.  Why he isn't taking her tonight, I don't know, unless she is refusing to go.  Which would be like her.  My lil' sissy doesn't like to inconvenience anyone - even at her own expense.  I think that is something we learned from our mother.

Intercession is praying for someone or some thing.  You pray because you want to see God act in that situation or circumstance.  Sometimes you can do it on your own and God will answer immediately.  Sometimes He wants us to ask our family and friends - and even strangers - to be in prayer and ask Him.  Where two or more have gathered together He is there - and when two or more intercede in prayer, He is listening.

Please take a moment and whisper a prayer for my little sissy, Anita.  That God will touch her body and bring complete and total healing, her fever will disappear, her body will be restored and whole.  Pray for wisdom for the doctors should she be taken back to the hospital.   In however method He chooses for her to be healed, He will be glorified, forever and ever.

Thank you for praying and interceding for my lil' sissy.

Blessings!

Are you a Princess?

As I sit here and ponder what to write today, my thoughts turn to my granddaughters.  I have been more involved with the older two, now 20 and 15, and I am thinking how from the very first moment I saw them, I have called them "Princess".  I figured their parents would call them 'Angel' or some other endearment, but for me, I decided I would call them 'Princess'.  And that is what they are.

They are full of grace and poise.  They hold their heads high and are not afraid of being their own person.  If you try to correct them, they will very firmly tell you "I am too a Princess, my Grandma says so!" 

I love so much being with them.  We enjoy a lot of the same movies.  Growing up, Bethany's favorite was the Swan Princess, but also Beauty and the Beast.  Tricia loves her ramen noodles when she is sick and we watch Cinderella.   I think we all could sit for hours and just watch the 'Princess movies'.  I love it when Bethany paints my fingernails with the faces of the Disney Princesses - without even looking at a photo!  She knows each Princess by heart.

Our Heavenly Father knows each of us 'by heart'.  He knows our every thought, before it is even thought or spoken.  He knows every beat of our heart.  He daily gives us abundant blessings - we only have to open our hearts and eyes to see and feel.  The gentle touch of a child, the glance of an eye, the unexpected warmth of good things - they are all gifts from Him.

Even though I know some of the things my 'Princesses' like, I don't know them by heart the way God does.  I just know to love them by heart.  They make my heart smile.  Little Princess Hailey lives far enough away I don't get to know her very well.  Some day perhaps I can.  God has truly blessed my life with all my Princesses - and my Princes' - and I am humbled by His graciousness to me.

Do you know that you touch our Father's heart?  Gaze into the heavens and seek Him.  Feel His peace, His love.  He loves you 'more than you will ever remember'.  After all, you could be a Princess!  (or a Prince!)

Blessings!