Last night one of my granddaughters sent me a photo of her daughter wearing a pink sweatshirt. I was delighted to get the photo, and as I looked at it, I noticed things written on the t-shirt. Things that I would say. I enlarged the screen so that I could see it better. And then the puzzle became clearer and I sent a note back.... is that a sweatshirt I had made you? ... and it was. "Grandma's Princess. Love you more. I'll love you forever, I'll love you for always, as long as I'm living, my Princess you'll be." That was the year that everyone got t-shirts or sweatshirts with something on them. Kudos to my daughter-in-law for hanging on to this one so that my great-granddaughter can wear it. It was one of those 'awwwww' moments for me.
Sometimes you give a gift that we hold on to. Some times we give a gift that even you can't let go of. For whatever reason. There is just something that holds it to us. Can you pause and think of something that someone has given you, perhaps just a silly little something, and you just don't want to let it go? I have several of those things all around the house, in my cedar chest, in drawers. I just can't let them go. Treasured memories and things that make me feel valued and loved.
I've managed to stay awake this morning, but not real well. I have laid my head back and closed my eyes a few times. I am feeling really tired for some reason. I know during the night I woke myself up coughing. I didn't take any musinex last night, with one intent that I wouldn't fall asleep in here this morning as I have nearly every morning this week. But also because we went to prayer meeting at church last night and it was a wonderful time of prayer. At the end, our pastor prayed and prophesied over the different sections of the church... and it just so happened that our section (although we claim all that was spoken and prayed over all the sections) was prayed over for healing. I claim that healing! I am in total agreement with that prayer. This sneezing, coughing, and blowing my nose has had its end! Every time I coughed during the night, I reminded the devil that I was healed in the Name of Jesus, therefore he had to go away and leave me alone! This morning I'm blowing my nose and sneezing, yes, but I am determined to continue to believe that I am healed of this cold and it is going away.
Sometimes you just have to believe - and hang on to that belief. That's where a lot of people fall back, I think. When Jesus healed, according to their faith, He didn't tell them that well, you are healed at this moment, but you are going to have to endure all the stuff for awhile yet. No, He told them they were healed! And I am claiming that healing for my body. And, with going on the Daniel fast in a few days, I will regain a lot of the energy and strength I have allowed other toxic foods to drain from my body.
What? You didn't know that a lot of our food has toxic stuff in it? Sure it does. Why do you think you feel bloated and tired after eating? Why do you think sometimes you can't stop with some foods and have to keep eating, although you know your stomach is screaming at you to stop? I admit, I have overdone it this week - well, since Christmas, eating chocolate, ice cream, candied nuts, and all kinds of things that I shouldn't. I know better. But, my rationale has been I am going on the fast and I need to get rid of it, right? But, it isn't going to spoil. I just want it out of my house. And what better way to get rid of it than to eat it? I'm just trying to clear away temptation, right?
I didn't do my mile walk yesterday. I could have, but in all honesty, I forgot. That's what happens when one isn't used to doing something. It takes 21 days to form a habit, they say. It had only been a few days. And I forgot. I was lazy January 1. I did two miles on January 2. I did one mile on January 3. I forgot on January 4. I need to do two miles today to get back on track for my forty miles in forty days. If I don't work it in today, I will be another mile behind tomorrow. It's best to keep pushing. I need to put it on my calendar 'walk one mile' so that I don't forget.
I did take 1.5 hours yesterday during the day to listen to a webinar presented by an 'old' friend who has taught me so much about Jesus. She is doing a 'wild women of God' conference next month and I would love to go, but I need to watch my vacation days. I'm not worried about the cost, for it is well worth it, although it would be probably close to $2K for the conference, meals, hotel, and airfare. I would find a way.... but I need to hang on not only to the money, but my time off work. Right now I have plenty of time that has carried over from last year, but - if we go - we have a wedding in Indiana the end of April for a nephew, my jailbreak getaway, and then the grandson's wedding in July in California, plus our anniversary getaway... all of that will cost money and I imagine I will need to use my savings to pay for the majority of it. But it will all take vacation days away, although I am also earning some. It just isn't earned as fast as it is used. Plus I try to keep a few days in case I should get sick and need time off. Which is rare, but it has happened. Or if I need a mental health day, like it was last month.
Anyway, back to the webinar for a moment.. well, I'll pull my thoughts and notes together to share some later. I think everyone should hear some of these points she made. It does make a lot of sense. I'm going to write them out and put them where I can see them. Reminders of things I need to do. More on this later.
Ephesians 3:10-13 (NKJV): "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rules of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand."
Some people tend to think that their daily battles with others are against others - but it isn't. It's the devil who likes to stir up issues, annoyances, and other things with others so that he can keep you in constant turmoil. Just the thought of someone irritates you? It really isn't them, it's the devil stirring up stuff inside that causes you to get angry or upset.
It is like when we hold on to things that someone gave us.... when they have 'irritated us', what do you want to do? Get rid of it. But when you make up, you wish you hadn't.
It's like back in 2012 and I did the mini marathon with my little sister. I pushed on her to get her to finish because she was wanting to quit at mile 2 - and we had 11.1 miles to go! Her comment "my boys would understand" made no sense to me. And, as you know, things were said to me that broke me, cut me to the quick. Things for which have never been retracted nor apologized for. (out of the heart the mouth speaks?) Things I am still recovering from. Anyway... in her anger at me, my sister threw away her medal and things she had gotten from walking the 13.1 mile mini marathon. Trashed them. She was so angry at ME, she threw it away as if it didn't happen. A few months later she wrote and asked me for MY medal. As she had ruined my memories of the mini marathon, I sent it to her. She held on to it for a few months and then sent it back with a note. I don't remember what the note said; I just put it in the cedar chest. It was as if she thought in the beginning that my medal could replace the one she threw away "after all, I did complete it", but then realized that it wasn't the same. Our relationship changed from that time on. And actually, it has been a good thing for both of us. But enough of that. Just wanted to give an example of when we throw away something of value, thinking it rids us of what it stands for, only to wish we had it back when something else happens.
I guess what I'm trying to say this morning is to step back in every circumstance (especially in 'disagreements with the spouse'!) step back and see what is the root of the disagreement. Sometimes hubby will go off on me - and it really isn't me that he is angry with. He is angry with himself about something, or irritated over something else. I just happened to be in his view. It wasn't about me at all. But we all do that. I do that to him as well. We do it to each other.
Each day we need to put on the armor of God; the Belt of Truth, the Breastplate of Righteousness, the Helmet of Salvation, Shoes of the Gospel, and pick up that Shield of Faith - and fight against the principalities that come up against us and tries to upset our lives.
Don't.Let.The.Enemy.Win.
Jesus went to the cross so that we are WINNERS! He broke the chains that bind us; Jesus set us free from all that the enemy throws at us. When something irritates you today, remember it isn't the people coming against you, it's the enemy. He likes keeping you stirred up with discontent and irritated. Don't let him win. Lean in to Jesus - and find Peace that passeth all understanding.
Blessings!
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