Since my 'old' boss left a few weeks ago, and my 'new' boss has taken over, the atmosphere around here has really changed. There seems to be no laughter, no joy, from anyone. We don't hear positive affirmations; we are lucky to hear a few words as the 'new' boss is always in her office or at another building for a meeting. Sometimes that is just 'ok'. The more I try to connect with my new boss, the more difficult it seems to be. Can not put my finger on what the issue is. I like her ok, that's not the problem. It's to have a meaningful connection.
And without it, I am wishing I could quit work and just volunteer somewhere. But that's not possible right now. But I have made a decision, and it is a big decision for me. A life-changing decision. I have decided that I will work only 7 more years. I'm sure hubby would go into panic mode if he heard that - and I actually think I have mentioned it in front of him, but don't recall his response. I'm weary of working. I've worked every year but one full year (not counting two pregnancies where I worked until 6 months - which was the rule then) and I was pregnant that year.... since I was fifteen and 1/2 years old. I enjoy what I do, but with all the changes, I don't want to do this anymore.
We just refinanced the house so cannot sell it, but I'm thinking in about five years I can talk hubby into selling it. I'm not sure where we would go from there, but something smaller and less maintenance so that I can start planning to leave the work force. I believe it can be done, living on SS....
I can remember in my early first marriage years when we were so poor we had absolutely nothing. Those were the best times and special memories in my heart. That is when I learned to cook from "scratch" a lot of dishes. Discovered my love for cooking. Did you know that with flour and water you can make just about anything and it will get eaten? We were happy.
In the Bible, seven is the number of completeness. As I pondered about quitting work, and made the decision in seven years, I realized that it had a completeness to it. I felt relief, and even joy, that I could possibly see the light at the end of the tunnel. That in 7 years I can perhaps begin to live life without getting up at 4AM. But I also know that I cannot stay at home. I did "retire" one year which proved that I couldn't ever retire retire..... which could be another blog.... which reminds me, I started this blog when I was on that year of "retirement". So much has changed since then. Work life, family life, family dynamics, etc. Everything has changed.
Life has changed. Sometimes I wish we could go back five years before .............. well, just before. Nothing is the same. I'm not the same. and Life goes on. Musings are done... time to get back to work. I wonder if I should try counting days..........
Blessings!
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