I read my son's blog this morning and now my eyes are wet. I hadn't heard that story he told before... and as amusing as it is now, I can see it happening then. I believe his father was well respected in town. I have a lot of memories - most I have forgotten, I admit, until something will trigger a thought. I was so naive ... and still am in so many ways.... but back then, I didn't have a clue about life. I'm glad I got to read that this morning. Memories are sometimes a good thing, and some one can get lost in.
Yesterday was a good day for friends. I forgot I was to have lunch with a couple of the executive assistants from work who are friends. I always feel so inferior as far as knowlege of computer programs - I don't use them, never have, don't want to, don't want to learn. They use them and talk about how helpful they are for what they do. One supports the President and the other supports the Chief Financial Officer. Thus far, none of my leaders have used these programs so why do I have to learn them? I can go to the programs and get the idea of what they are for - but I am a 'hands on learn as I go' type of person... don't just tell me or show me a video. I have to actually do the steps myself in order to learn it. I suppose sometime I should...but why... I think I don't want to learn because I don't plan to move up the ladder or change jobs. Just leave me alone where I am. Anyway, we had lunch yesterday and since I was with them, the two hours we were gone I didn't have to worry about. We did talk some about work, but mainly about the struggles the one has in the process of her divorce and being a single mom to two young boys. I just sit and listen. She doesn't want advice; I'm not sure what she wants, other than an outlet to share her anger and frustration at her ex and the things he is putting her through.
Then I got a surprise text in the afternoon from a friend that we often meet for dinner. She said she knew it was short notice, but could we meet at Applebees for dinner... I checked and we had nothing going on so we met with them. Great food and great friendship. I love the grilled chicken, garlic mashed potatoes and broccoli at Applebees. Seasoned just right and just enough for me.
I am finding I am busy with gaining a new boss. He doesn't have me do much yet; just a few meetings, but he does ask questions or I occasionally have directions for him to do something. The 'other' new boss is starting to send things too - altho she is not officially my boss until the day after labor day. I may have to learn the new programs because of her. Not really looking forward to working with her, but I must remain positive - it may just be my fears of having to learn things I don't want to learn.
I have a lot on my mind this morning as I search for things to write about. Thoughts come to me, but many I do not want to share. No need to. Just my opinions on things. Or my comments. My sister reminded me last night as we talked - about how sharp a tongue can be. Luckily, this time it was not directed at me but at our great-niece, whom she tells others is her 'daughter'. She has written the great-niece a note about something she doesn't agree with. My heart is grieved; about the situation she wrote about, but more so about her letters. I've been on the receiving end, even recently, and they are cruel and hurtful and sharp. They are full of her feelings, her anger, that needs an outlet and it is a strike at anyone close to her.
Then I have to sit back and think about myself. How sharp is my tongue when I talk to others. I hope that I weigh my words and choose not to use them if they are sharp. I know I do have a lot of thoughts about some issues, but I rarely will confront someone by letter - or in person. I instead pray about them and ask God to intervene in the issues, or remove them from my mind. And God answers the way He chooses is best. I have to trust Him and leave my heart with him.
Oh man, I have written and erased in nearly every paragraph this morning. Life is hard sometimes, and never to be walked alone. But sometimes it is best to pour out those feelings - whatever they may be - out to Jesus and ask Him to intervene and take care of them. Things still may not work out the way I want them to, but I would never want to anger or hurt anyone, by a critical and sharp spirit. I would rather sit down one on one and talk it through and listen to them, and hope they listen to me.
Proverbs 15:1, 3 "A soft answer turns away wraft, but a sharp word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise uses knowledge wisely, but the mouths of fools pours forth foolishness........ A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit."
Have you broken someone's spirit lately by your harsh words? Perhaps you need to go back to that person and tell them you love them, and you didn't mean those words to come out like they did. Perhpas open the door for a dialog about that situation; and for the most part, listen to what they share. And if they don't want to talk about it, or share, you have done your part. Sometimes people just want others to listen. That's why we have so many counselors ... I wish we had better ones... but friends also can listen... don't need their response... just need someone to care enough to 'hear' us. That helps a lot.
So today, review in your mind if you have spoken with a harsh or critical spirit - and go to that person to make amends. In your frustration anger can come forth - I deal with that a lot - but I'm also learning that I need to maintain boundaries within my own emotions before I share what's on my mind.
The movie 'Walking Tall' just popped into my mid. That was a good movie. Walk softly and carry a big stick - right?
Have a great day - be kind, speak softly. Love with all your heart.
Blessings.
