It's about character....integrity....

 Today I am thinking about character. As I read my devotionals, and my Bible, it all points to the character of the man or woman that we have become.  Is our character filled with integrity?  Can we be trusted to do the right thing?  

Daniel, chapter 6, talks about his character.  He went before God three times a day and prayed and presented his requests.  He was so great in his integrity that Darius wanted to promote Daniel, brought as a teen from his own country as a prisoner, to Prime Minister!  Could one even imagine!  But there was also a lot of jealousy at that time and some men tried to prevent it by talking Darius into proclaiming no one could go to anyone else but Darius.  What person would not sign off on that!  But Daniel went to his room and prayed to the Lord  three times.  And was reported ... and we all know the story of Daniel being thrown into the lion's den.  But God rescued him and shut the mouths of the lions.   If your Bible isn't handy, go to Bible Gateway.com and pull up Daniel 6.  Refresh your memory.  Daniel had character, and he had integrity.

Call me dated or old-fashioned or idealistic if you wish, but my passionate plea is that we unearth and restore the concept of character and integrity.  It has been buried long enough.  Agree?  Character belongs first on our list when we want to 'hang out' with others or do business with people.  It must be a non-negotiable among those we associate with.  It is the foundational quality we all expect - and should receive - from our doctors, attorneys, counselors, pastors, teachers, - even our banker, policemen, mechanics, repairman - you name it.  We want to be with and use people of character and integrity.  

When we find it lacking, we feel it.  We know it isn't there, and we resent it.  If I am around people and I feel I can't trust them, I feel that their word isn't true, it bothers me - a lot.  We do have a right to expect character and integrity in people.

Solomon, King David's son who was so wise, was right.  If we walk correctly and securely, we don't have to worry about being 'found out'.  If we always do what is right and good, and always speak the truth, we have no fear that we may forget what we told this person or that person because it should be the same - truth,.

Psalm 35:23  - Contend for me, my God and my Lord.   What is that about?  David was asking God to fight for him.  We have not only Jesus fighting our battles for us, but we also have the Holy Spirit.  God's Word says so.  Prayer is the way we let go and let God.  Prayer is the difference between us fighting our battles and letting God fight for us.  When we have integrity and character, we are the apple of God's eye and He will go into the battle like a mother grizzly.  You have seen your wife or your mama fight for you or one of your children?  Hang on - you haven't seen anything until God steps in!

Our prayers do not have expiration dates.  I read the first prayer back when the constitution was signed.  Dr. Jacob Duche prayed for our nation, turning to Psalm 35.  He prayed that just as the Lord contended for David, God would contend for their cause if it were a righteous one.  His prayer is more than just a part of our history, it's a piece of our destiny.

O Lord, our heavenly Father, high and mighty King of kings and Lord of lords, who dost from thy throne behold all dwellers on the earth, and reignest with power supreme and uncontrolled over all the kingdoms, Empires, and Governments; look down in mercy, we beseech thee, on these our American states who have fled to Thee from the rod of the oppressor and thrown themselves on Thy gracious protection, desiring to be henceforth dependent only on Thee.....

Be Thou present, O God of wisdom, and direct the councils of this honorable assembly.... Shower down on them and the millions they here represent, such temporal blessings as Thou seeist expedient for them in this world and crown them with everlasting glory in the world to come.  All this we ask in the name and through the merits of Jesus Christ, Thy Son and our Savoir, Amen.

This prayer is still being answered yet today.  It is part of our prayer genealogy as Americans.  It is part of our history, and it is our destiny.  America is not always right.  We definitely know that our leaders in government right now are not filled with character nor integrity.  But we are called to pray for them, and we should desire to pray for America.  We have experienced many blessings because of the favor of God.

If you are on God's side, then God is on your side.  And we can live with holy confidence that God will contend for us in our battles.  It doesn't mean we won't have setbacks nor have to sacrifice things along the way.  It means that when we pray and ask God to take over, to contend for us, we have won.  We may not understand HOW we have won, but when it is right and good, you can be confident that God is in control.

How does that make you feel right now as you read that?  Can you think of situations that you wish that God would contend for you in?  Perhaps there is a situation you feel you have been wronged.  Take it to God and ask Him to contend, to deal, with it.  He make take that situation and make it right - or he may take that situation and teach you a lesson from it.  I'm not going to even pretend to know what God will do.

But we are called to be men and women of upstanding character and integrity.   If we all did an integrity check right now, where would you fall?  I imagine we all have work to do in that area.  

Father, help us to be men and women of character and integrity, bringing honor and glory to Your Name.  We fail so many times, Lord, in our walk of life.  Help us to bring our problems and issues to You, and allow You to take care of them however You choose.  We trust You, Lord.  Please forgive us for trying to do life by ourselves.  We will always fail.  We choose You, Lord.  Please take what is troubling us today, and contend for us.  And Lord, right now our government is in a mess and they seem to have turned away from You.  Only You know the truth, Lord.  Would You please contend for us as a nation and restore truth and value and character and integrity in the people leading us?  Thank you, Father.  We leave it in Your hands.  Amen.

Only God can help our nation.  Instead of arguing amongst ourselves about who should be our leader, let's trust God to take care of any and all situations and use who the people have put in charge to turn us back to Him.

Blessings!

Everything points to faith...

 As I read my Bible this morning, read the devotionals, it seems that everything was pointing to faith.  Faith in what?  Certainly not our abilities to do things.  Certainly not in things we buy or use.  Certainly not in CREATED things.  No, everything points to the CREATOR.

I sit here and think about what do I have faith in.... is it in myself?  No, I can do nothing unless God gives me that ability to do it.  I can't even work at my job, unless He gives me the mindset to know what to do. (Thank you, Lord)  Do I have faith in my money?  Heck, no!  It fades faster than a glass of water being drank!  Is our faith in our government?  Oh the pain of that one!  If anyone has faith in our government, heaven help him!  This is a painful time.  My heart and my mind has been pulled and stretched - and each time I have to fall on my face and cry out to God for mercy upon this nation.  No, definitely no faith in our government.  But we are to pray for them, regardless of who is in office.  God says so.

There are several other things I could mention and ask if we have faith in, but I think you get the general idea of the question.  Did you pause to ask yourself 'what do I have faith in'?  You have to believe in something?  It just popped in my mind of someone saying 'Yes, I believe I will have another ....' - you can fill in the blank.  Sorry - the humor just popped in.  But what do we truly have faith in?

James 1 talks about having faith and not doubting - for if you doubt, you are a double-minded man (or woman).  I paused and thought about things I had had faith in the past.  For one, a biggie, is that my daughter would be healed of acute lymphoblastic leukemia with the Philadelphia chromosone.   The thought of 'she won't make it' never entered my mind, even when she was the sickest.  I stood on my faith and cried out to God, and He heard me,  (and hundreds of others all over the world), and healed her.

There are other things that I have had faith for and God didn't answer me the way I wanted Him to.  But I still believed He would.  And He probably DID answer, but He answered His way, and not mine.  My job is to ask and to believe that He will answer; and He always answers but that answer may also be 'no'.  And I accept that, although sometimes it is very painful to accept.  I have had two brothers and my mother pass on.  Did I pray that they would live?  Yes.  Did I believe that God would heal them and restore them?  Yes.  Did He?  No.  I don't know why He didn't.  

I can remember when my father in law passed away and how devastated I was.  After remarrying, dad was my best friend and the one I felt I could run to with issues and he would encourage me and help me understand the behavior, etc. of my new husband.  I adored him and we talked and wrote each other frequently.  I had printed some stationary for him to write on (as this was still before computers and emails) 'From the dining room table of....'.  After dad passed, I was cleaning out a closet and found a box with more of the stationary in it and I burst into tears.  I screamed at God and told Him how hurt I was that He took my father in law away from me.  I was so angry with Him and screaming and crying and telling Him all that I was feeling.  

I remember, too, feeling His arms wrap around me and holding me close, I felt He whispered into my ear, "I know it hurts.  I know you miss him.  But I'm here.  I love you."  And the peace that passeth all understanding flooded over me.   That moment of being totally honest with God on what I was feeling was a complete release of what I had been holding in.  Never would I have thought I would have screamed at God (good thing I was home alone).  But, in doing so, I released all the pain I had been holding in.  I don't encourage anyone to scream at God, but He does want us to share what we feel and reassure us that He is there and knows what we are going through.  After all, God gave us His beloved Son, Jesus, and He died.  The good news is that Jesus rose again, and we shall too at some point.

Wow, my mind has been traveling roads I haven't traveled for awhile.  I guess sometimes we need to rehearse what God HAS done for us, because in doing so, it reaffirms our faith in Him and that He truly does love us.  When we have painful things happen, He knows what we are feeling.  We can't understand the WHY, but we can always lean into the WHO.   And we can always have the faith that no matter what happens to us or around us - God is always there and He will never leave us nor forsake us.  When we lose a loved one, He's there.  When we go through sickness, or a loved one does, He is still there.  When we have financial issues, He is there.  When our children drive us crazy, He is still there.  

Keep running to Him.  Keep asking.  Keep reaching out to Him.  He will increase your faith and help you to understand that life isn't always what we want it to be, but with Him, it is always better than it could be.  

I don't know what my future holds, life or death, sickness or losing everything.  I don't know.  But I do know Who holds my future.  Jesus is the Author and Perfector of my faith.  Everything I am and everything I have, belongs to Him alone.  I have nothing on my own.  These 'things' can be destroyed in an instant.  I can grow weary of them or even have to let them go (which I have learned a lot about this past year - the letting go).  They are just things.  But my faith stands firm on the Word of God.

Where is your faith today?  What do you believe in?  What holds you together?  Try God.  Read His Word.  It's all true.  Even today.  Trials and temptations will come.  But our God stands firm.

God said it.  I believe it.  That settles it.  

Blessings!

It's all about Sheeba....

 I could have put this as an addendum to yesterday's post, but decided to just make it one for today.  Sheeba is 100% better.   I don't have much of a theory as to what was going on with her.... things we thought about...

**** did they 'drug' her with something to calm her down?  As in benadryl?

**** did they 'discipline' her at one point that it scared her to move?

**** is she like us humans that when we are away from home, we don't always sleep well? And being gone 3 nights she felt she was deserted? 

Perhaps that would be the reason why she slept all day when we brought her home?  Plus all night?  She did eat all her dinner.  But no barking, no activity from her at all.  On Tuesday she seems more like her 'old' self  in that she was barking, running around, and trying to jump on me.  Wanting scratched and her belly rubbed.  Just like normal.  Could she have just missed us so much that she didn't sleep?  And then her energy was gone?  It was really odd.  But we are glad she is now seemingly ok.  And before long, will be annoying.

You know, we see photos all the time of dogs just laying in the shelters - alone, sad.... could that have been our Sheeba for three days?  But they said she ate fairly well and they had play day... hmmm, that was only one day we paid for... could it be that she was only taken out to do her business and that's it? Note to self - pay for more play days for her.  I am just glad she is back to 'normal'.

I actually started this post yesterday afternoon because I wanted to be sure and update you on Sheeba.  She definitely was back to normal yesterday.  Hubby did call the pet resort and talked to them... of course they would have never acknowledged anything, but he did call and talk with them, sharing her behavior.  I am leaning towards she thought we had deserted her, and when we picked her up and for the rest of the day, she rested as if she didn't sleep well while she was away from us.  New surroundings, new people, around other dogs that she normally isn't around - I'm sure she is just like us in that our emotions are out of sorts.   But I'm glad she is better.

Had our girls' night out last night and I started a new baby blanket to donate.  I still have two other projects I'm working on but wanted to start something new.  Got a bit started on it.  I have about 13 rows to go on a blanket I am making for a great-granddaughter who lives up in St. John.  If I get it completed before my youngest takes a trip back up there, I'll send it with him.  Otherwise, if not, I'll put back and keep for her for next Christmas.  Think I may start one for each of my great-granddaughters.  But, I also want to make them quilts but have been lazy thus far.  Need to work on that!

I was grateful to God yesterday for I finally got the minutes done - and in doing so, found that my boss had given me something to complete - and I had totally forgotten about it.  I was to make a grid of sorts to track information on.  But then, her 'chiefs' had also forgotten about it for they were to supply me with the information and they had not.  So I finished the minutes, created the grid, and sent to the chiefs to review.  This next meeting is next Thursday (21st) and I will need to attend it.  Will see if I get any of the information for the grid.  We've shortened it down to 2 hours from 4 hours so that is a good thing.  My big boss, who 'owns' the meeting will still be gone.  I was happy too that we decided to cancel a meeting scheduled for today - none of the chiefs wanted to take it over and with the big boss gone - who owns that meeting too - it was easier just to cancel.  I don't need to attend that one so it's ok.  In fact, I don't think I have any meetings I have to attend and take minutes at this week.  But I have 3 two-hour meetings I have to attend next week and take minutes.  Ugh - did I ever say I disliked to do minutes?

I'm grateful to God not only for helping me finish those minutes, but to 'remind' me I needed to do that grid.  I didn't have that in my notes I had taken and when I listened to the tape to finish the minutes, I heard it again.  I almost didn't finish the minutes and just turn them in the way I had them.  Whew, God is good.   Thank you, Jesus!  I'm not on a limb.

Today is another work day - hump day - and I think the main thing I will need to do is get training on timecards.  All this time and I have never approved timecards, but now the big boss is getting overwhelmed so I have to take it on.  I will be able to go in and approve the timecards of those who report to her.  I don't report directly to her so it doesn't affect my own.  Not that it matters.  I'm salaried so I don't need to worry about hours.  For that I am grateful.  I put in more hours as a rule, but some days I may put in less, although working from home I'm still checking emails and doing meetings while I bake cookies or whatever.  I rarely take a 'lunch break' or any break so it comes out.  And I'm usually on the computer before 7AM.  Sometimes I even check messages on the weekends to see if there is something I need to prepare for.  As long as I get my work done, no one cares.  But I have about 8 learning sessions to go through to learn about timecards so hope to get started on that today.

Guess that is all I have for today - just wanted to be sure to give an update on Sheeba.   Hope that you have a blessed day!

Day One - check..... cookies.... check

 I made it through without a lot of difficulty, day one of my fast.  I am still working through the specifics of what I'm fasting, mainly due to convenience I'm afraid.  But I have stuck to it.  Fruits and vegetables and last night I had a piece of salmon.  Now I am not going to every day tell you what I ate, so don't worry about that.  I'm just holding myself accountable.  The first day is sometimes the hardest, just to get started and stick to it.  But I have passed the first day with an orange for breakfast, nothing for lunch, and then a Greek Salmon Salad for dinner.  Yeah, we went out.  But I had a reason for us going out.

During my 'lunch break' that I rarely take, I made white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookies for my middle child.  He had commented that he was going to 'fast speaking to mom for 21 days because she is teasing me with cookies'.  Or something like that.  Couldn't have that happen - although it does happen frequently - for months, at times.  It was all in fun and I made the cookies in fun.  And the best part, I didn't taste even one of them.  I didn't even pick at the dough, nor taste a chocolate chip, nor eat a macadamia nut.  I didn't even lick my fingers, although the thought did occur to me.  I have no idea how the cookies came out, but I'm hoping they are good.

So after I got off work yesterday I asked hubby if wanted to go for a ride and then we could grab a salad for dinner - he's all for food.  (I wonder if that is the 'work for food' signs came from?)  Anyway, we drove to the middle child's house, got to see the DIL but not the son as he was already at his pub.  So we dropped off the cookies and headed to the restaurant we frequent and had the salad before coming home.  It was nice just to get out of the house again.   Now the middle child has no excuse NOT to talk to me. :-)  So there!

Hubby picked up Sheeba yesterday and I must admit we have some concerns.  She doesn't seem to be her usual self, full of energy.  Usually, when she comes in the house, she makes a bee-line for my room to find me.  This time she walked with hubby down the hall to me.  She didn't show any excitement at seeing me, she didn't even try to jump into my lap.  She slept all afternoon, snoring loudly as usual.  She seems to have a little difficulty getting up.  Maybe it is just that we are noticing it?  I don't know.  After she saw me, she went to her crate and spent most of the afternoon there, sleeping.  

My weight bench got delivered yesterday and I went to the door to retrieve it.  Sheeba did get up and approached the door, but I told her 'shhh' cause hubby was asleep in his chair.  She didn't bark but stood and watched.  I brought the box in and had to tell her to get out of the way, which woke hubby up.  After that, she just laid on the floor.

After we went to dinner and came back home - usually when I go sit on the couch in 'my corner', she comes flying to get on my lap and bury her face in my side.... this time she walked to me, but did not even attempt to climb in my lap.  Totally not Sheeba.  I tried to get her to jump into my lap as usual - and she would not even attempt it.

Something is definitely wrong.  I have rubbed her hips and legs and she doesn't wimper or act like she is in pain.  It's almost like she has been either worked out and worn out, or has been drugged.  I thought for a few moments that maybe someone had kicked her because she wasn't jumping and seemed to have difficulty getting up.  It's just really NOT Sheeba.  She is subdued and quiet.   We are both concerned and are hoping she comes around today.  If not, hubby is going to call the dog resort to ask what happened - not that they will confess to anything.  If she doesn't improve in a few days, we will take her to the vet to see if there is something wrong with her back end, although she doesn't limp when she walks either.  I even wondered if they worked intensely on training her not to jump on people.  Could they do that in three days? It's not that we want her to jump on people or be like she was, difficult to hold on to and using her strength against us, but it is such a drastic change we are concerned something is wrong.  When I take her out back to do her thing, I usually use the long leash and will tell her to 'run' and she will run in a wide circle while I hold on to the leash.  I figure this gets her a little exercise and she will run several times around this large circle in the back yard area.  Last night she wouldn't run.  Like I said, it seems to be an over the weekend thing and it has concerned us.  Hopefully she will be better and back to herself today.  At first we jokingly said she was paying us back for putting her away for three days.  And we recalled when we took her to PetSmart hotels that she would sometimes come back subdued for a little while, but quickly snapped out of it.  It just seems so different this time.  I hope they didn't hurt her and all this is just our noticing things.

I was reviewing the message I plan to give this weekend at the RV park church in Pioneer Village.  I like the fact they are now taping the messages and they are 'live' but only for the reason I can critique myself.  I did this message a couple weeks ago at the other RV park church and they thought they taped it, but something happened and it didn't record.   It's interesting to listen to myself speak and watch my mannerisms while I do so.  It's been many years since I was taped.  I do have a couple that I spoke at and sent to my sister but she only commented she couldn't open one.  And that's ok.  

One of the things I talk about is how we don't always notice things.  And I am very guilty of NOT noticing things.   Not sure why that is, but I have mentally shut myself off from that, I think.  So it is surprising that I am noticing these things about Sheeba.  Perhaps it is because she and I have a special relationship?  She knows I won't (always) push her away when she jumps on me - at least not right away.  I will rub her belly or just love on her before I tell her to 'get down' and she usually does.

Kind of like what we do with God, do you think?  We like Him being around, and taking care of things for us, providing for us, meeting our needs.... but then we take Him for granted.  We can see what all He does for us, but we don't really notice it.  After awhile we tend to take for granted that He will always provide, He will always be there when we need Him, He will always give us what we want.  But we don't acknowledge Him, don't even stop to thank Him for what He has provided.   

But what if..... what if.... we start our day with just a whisper under our breath - 'Thank You, God, for all the things You have provided, and are providing, for me and my family.  Thank You, for always being there and available for us when we need You.  Thank You for all that You do, even when we do not ask or acknowledge You.  Thank You for loving me, loving us, and never giving up on us."

If you just take a moment and whisper those words - even in your own words just a 'Thank You, Lord'.... you just might be filled with a peace that you have never experienced before.  Try it - I dare you.

Blessings!

Trying to get back on schedule....

We went to bed around the usual time last night - 8:30-9:00PM-ish -and I couldn't sleep.  I tossed and turned what seemed like hours.  I finally dozed off and when the alarm went off at 4AM this morning, I did not want to get up.  Finally struggled up at 4:15AM and headed to my room.  I snuggled into my 'blankie' that I wrap up in and left the light off, hoping that I could doze again, but it eluded me because I had already made myself awake.  I gave up and turned on the light to get on my quiet time with God.  

Not that I didn't want to, I just wanted to sleep.  Like many of us do when we don't get all the sleep we want.  It will take another night or so to get back on schedule again.  Usually on weekends I still get up at least by 5AM, but this weekend, because we were away and I couldn't turn on the light without waking up hubby, and continuing to doze some, it was at least 6-6:30AM before we got up.  Threw my entire day off, but we weren't doing anything anyway so it didn't matter.  But it did throw my sleep schedule off and now I need to get back on schedule.

Checked my work emails when we got home yesterday since I took Friday off with driving down to the office and then to the hotel.  I had an email from one of my bosses - her mother had contracted COVID right after Christmas and she passed away Friday evening.  Boss was letting me know that and that she is planning on driving to Wisconsin on Thursday this week.  She is terrified of COVID and I'm not sure why, and she got her shot right after they came out.  She mentioned that she had 3 issues that allowed her to get it right away.  I don't remember what they are.  I never knew she had anything wrong.

Speaking of getting the vaccine, I'm starting to get flack from various ones.  I don't want to get it.  Because of my age, people seem to think I should.  Even healthy people have gotten the virus and died.  And I realize that I could as well.  But, until it is mandatory, I really don't want to.  One of my brothers pushed on me last night to get it when I could.  He made me feel good when he commented 'I couldn't stand to lose you'.  I told him that I would get it when it became mandatory to keep my job.  The flu shot is mandatory and I get it every year.  I just hate to put things in my body that don't need to be there.  This shot hasn't had time to be tested, and I've heard of nurses who got the first dose (why do we need two doses?  It makes no sense to me) got COVID anyway.  It doesn't mean you can let down your guard and not wear a mask.  You will still be required to wear it even if you get the shot.  The restrictions will not go away.  Something else to think about.  Do I or don't I?  How do you feel about getting the shot?  It's not like I'm out in public a lot.  

Yes, we went away this weekend, but we spent the majority of the time in the room.  We ate out once at Mimi's.  We walked to Circle K once to get food for lunch and dinner.  Yes, I am very aware we could have definitely picked up something at Circle K.   I still do not want to get the vaccine.  Not yet, anyway.  I want to believe that God will protect me and keep me safe.  If I get it, they He has allowed it.

The same with all this 'stuff' going around about what can happen within the next few weeks.  It could be terrifying for some, but I again want to believe that it won't affect us unless God allows it to happen. And if He allows it, He will see us through to the end.  I'm in His hands.  I don't need to worry about the future or what the future holds.  My job is to pray and trust.  And I did that in my wakeful hours last night.  I know where I'm going when my life is over.  Whether I go sooner or later, I am in God's hands.

Today is the first full day of my fast as I decided to start at Sundown last night.   We stopped on the way home from the hotel yesterday and I actually got a burger and fries at Coco's for a late lunch.  This is the second time I've gotten burger and fries from there, and it was really good both times.  (there I go, talking about food and I'm on a fast!)  I even made shortbread cookies - of sorts - last night but didn't taste them.  I found a recipe later for white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookies and hope to make those today.  Hopefully I have everything I need, even if I need to make only a half batch.  It's a different recipe than what I used last night-which was off the package of macadamia nuts.

Well, I reckon I need to get busy with some other things.  Hubby didn't pick Sheeba up yesterday.  He puzzles me a lot when it comes to Sheeba.  I would have picked her up to save $$ - she can be annoying, but so are we at times.  But he chose to leave her another night and will pick her up later this morning.  His comment last night was how nice it was not to have to get after her for doing things or having to take her out.  And this morning as he brought in my coffee he commented how nice it was that he didn't have to leave the lights off (as if his moving around didn't cause her ears to perk up) and be quiet but could turn all the lights on and do what he wanted to do without having to take her out.   Yes, Sheeba can be a pain most times, because she is so big, but overall, she is a good dog.  She doesn't eat our shoes, or clothes, or the furniture.  Other than catching her ON the couch a couple times, she stays off it.  She's just like a child who wants attention.  Give it to her for a few minutes and she goes off and does her own thing.  When she needs to go out - well, I'm going to stop there.

I know this is lengthy but I am going to share one more thing.   We watched Pastor Jentezen Franklin yesterday morning and he preached on the fast.  I really loved the message - it was one of his best ones, I think - I thought of my middle child and one of his favorite movies.  Pastor Franklin spoke some on the movie 'Field of Dreams'.  I want to listen again.  I encourage you to listen to him.  You can get his service for 1-10-21 on Facebook under his name.  It is well worth listening to.  

Anyway - he suggested 3 topics for the 3 weeks of fasting.  Week one - fast food... i.e., do the Daniel Fast or give up specific foods.  Week two - fast from social media (perfect time to do so with everything coming to a head in government).  Week three - fast from negativity - in other words, speak life-giving words, and eliminate the negative words.

Another thing he mentioned..... in 'defending your field of dreams'..... Change of pace (change what you do) + Chance of Place (where you go) = Change of Perspective (will change how you look at things).  If we hang around negative people, you will become negative.  If you think the worst about people, no matter where you go or what you do, you can never see them in a different light.  Start your day with a prayer that God will open your eyes to see people through His eyes.  That person who irritates the living heck out of you?  They may be going a rough time.  Give them grace.  Your spouse who wants to do things their way?  Something in their past may have trigger something in the present.  Give them grace.  Don't think you want to change your ways or that you can't after all these years?  Give yourself grace.

Grace, grace, God's grace.  There is nothing like it.

Blessings!

Sunday Sundown... the beginning...

 We are getting ready to begin our 21 day fast that we do at the beginning of each year - or at least the last several years.  I can't remember when I/we first began to do this.  I'm going to keep this in a 'me' mode because I should not answer to hubby, or respond for him.

Why am I doing this fast?  I have several specific things that I am praying for, and have been praying for.  I have other things that I want to talk with God about more specifically.  I am doing this fast so that I can give back to God the first fruits of this month - give Him a portion of this year that I will seek Him and His face.

True, I do not always get what I ask for, but I never stop believing that God has something better for me.  I may ask for some little thing, thinking that God would surely give it to me, and yet, He may have something better planned for me, and I must remain diligent and intentional in my seeking.  Only until I release what I ask for because He has provided, must I quit.  Unless, of course, I feel what I've asked for is of no value.

I was reading in my Bible this morning and read something that is so true.  It has to do with fasting and the purpose of it.  Unfortunately, I cannot find that specific statement at this time so perhaps I will find it again tomorrow.   We are in the final morning of our weekend getaway and getting ready to watch a couple services on my laptop before packing everything up and heading out.

Hubby has come out of the shower and even though he knows I'm writing in my computer, wants to chat about different things.  This is why we do our quiet times in different locations, even though at the same time.  We both have been quiet for the past hour as we read our Bibles and devotionals, and had our prayers, but now I'm on my computer so talk is free game.  

I have started a fasting journal in another folder on this computer so that I can journal every day what I am praying for and asking for and how God is answering those requests.  I usually write them in a book, but I do want to get away from the books as they take up so much space.  I will buy a new thumb drive and will label it my fasting journals for future reviews.  I probably have 50 or more journals, probably more, that I have written over the years - some with fasting things in them, and some not.  Perhaps I will remember to sort them out as I write them in the computer.

What have I decided to give up on this fast?  It sometimes is easier to say what I will eat on the fast, but in my situation, I have to choose what to give up, and if I can just eat what I desire without conflicts, then it will happen.  I will be giving up all breads and bread products (which includes breaded vegetables, i.e., fried okra.)   I will be giving up beef and pork products (including bacon) and limiting meat to fish and chicken/turkey, if at all.  I have a lot of conflict on that one so it is easier to just say I will eat fish or chicken/turkey.  No chocolate.... that may be a hard one, but I think I have finally eaten all the chocolate at home leftover from Christmas... 

Oh wait... I still have chocolate in the freezer, and I still plan to make white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookies at some time for my middle child.  I didn't bake him cookies for Christmas this year..... no real reason why I didn't ... I don't know why I didn't.  But I want to do it now that the holidays are over.  Also Oatmeal Raisin cookies for a grandson.  I would bake anything for any of my children or grandchildren; they just need to let me know what they like and I would be happy to do so for them, because I love them so much.

Just like our Heavenly Father loves us so much.  Oh how He loves us!  He doesn't command us to fast.  He does tell us in His Word what we SHOULD eat... and shouldn't eat.  We would probably all be strong and healthy if we ate and did what He tells us to.  But, like me, I'm sure you love FOOD.  And usually it doesn't matter a lot what it is.  We love the cheeses, and love the gooey sauces, and the meat, and the ... and I'm getting hungry!

I'd like to leave you with a challenge this morning.  Starting at sundown tonight (Sunday) or even tomorrow morning (Monday), assuming you have read this, make the decision to give up one thing for God.  For 21 days, can you do it?  Would you give up cigarettes?  Would you give up alcohol?  Would you give up a favorite food?  Would you give up a favorite game you like to play on the computer?  

What would you give up for Jesus?  Just for 21 days.  I won't even challenge you to pray.  When you give it up, your thoughts will turn to Jesus and when it does, thank Him for all that you have.  You have a home to be sheltered in.  A bed to sleep in.  Food on the table.  A job that will provide for your family.  Money in the bank to pay your bills. Your health.  There are so many things to thank Jesus for.  Just take one, and thank Jesus for another day with those who love you, and you love them.

Let me know what you are thinking about giving up.  It helps with accountability if you just express to someone what you are willing to do.

It's just 21 days.  Can you do it?  If you fail, don't beat yourself up.  But if you succeed, you will feel so blessed.

Try it.  You will be glad you did.

Blessings!

When you are on a specific schedule, it's hard to change it....

 I am so used to getting up early that my internal clock is messed up for life, I think.  Our room at the hotel is pretty nice.  Once we checked in yesterday afternoon, we didn't even leave the room.  We had eaten a late lunch at my office, and I had picked up a couple packages of the small donuts for breakfast this morning.  We ate those around 7PM last night.  We weren't really hungry, at least I wasn't, but my tummy felt blah after eating fried food from the cafeteria earlier.  So we had coffee (such as it was) and donuts.

We did a lot of reading last night, and I did crochet some.  Eventually we decided about 9-ish I guess to go to sleep.  Don't know what time it was, but around 12:15AM I awoke.  Could not go back to sleep, but did manage to doze until 3:15AM, and then sleep totally eluded me.  I tossed and turned until around 6AM when hubby finally started to wake up.  I couldn't get up cause if I turned a light on, being one room, it would have awakened hubby and we don't wake grouchy up in the mornings until urgent.  (and the same for me).

We got dressed and headed downstairs because they had told us when we checked in that there was a continental breakfast.  Which could be anything.  Saving $$ is always an idea so we were game for it and went to get it.  We both received a white bag.  We had a choice of orange juice or apple juice.  We got a 3 ounce can.  In the bag was a plastic spoon, a small container of strawberry yogurt, a very small blueberry muffin, a granola bar (which I broke up in the yogurt which gave it some crunch)... and we asked for extra coffee packets.  We got two.  One pouch makes one cup of coffee.  But I'm not complaining.  I brought V-8 juice with us and several bottles of water.  I have to have my water.  And we saved money, which makes me happy.

Now I do see from our window about a block away a Chick-fil-a and it IS Saturday so it is open.... we think we may do an early lunch there, just to get out of the room and walk some.  It's a little "crisp" out this morning so waiting until late morning is fine with me.  We may find someplace to stop at to pick up something for breakfast in the morning.  Or not.  Chick-fil-a will be closed tomorrow so that is out.  Will check out what is in walking distance.  It wouldn't hurt us at all to walk a bit just to get some exercise and fresh air.  Lacking a lot of that in my life this past year.

I'm sure you are surprised that I'm writing in here - yes, I brought my computer with me.  Decided at the last minute to do so.  I'm wanting to create a place in a folder to start doing my journaling in here.  I have so many books from over 30 years of journaling that I need to move them to a computer and dispose of the books themselves.  Yes, I was just going to throw them away, but my son suggested I keep them so that in the future, they would know what I felt and how I did things, basically, 'in my time'.  My words, not his.  My thought is that I would create a folder, and then just grab a book and whatever the date is, label it starting with the date.  Then input things that I wrote/prayed about.  I also spent lots of time praying that is NOT in the books, but most have my general issues/pain/struggles and joys.  I may have to do folders by months - that would probably be easier than trying to put everything into one folder. Just still pondering how I will do that.  Besides all that, I like writing my thoughts first thing in them morning in here.  I love reading my son's blog, and read it before I type anything in here.  I usually avoid typing anything in here while around hubby....don't care for his comments, and I really don't want him reading my blog. Why?  Because it is my safe place to say what I want without his comments (and believe me, there would be plenty), but he made a comment a few weeks ago when he came into the room where I do my quiet time, saw me on the computer, and commented about me using the computer as my journal now.  I let it ride with no comment.  He doesn't question, and he hasn't read.  And that makes me happy.

What kept me awake last night.  It's crazy.  Hubby and I agreed, after a short discussion about the political issues right now, that we would talk about it no more this weekend (thank goodness).  When I awoke at 12:15AM, all I could think about was the political issues happening right now.  It grieves my heart deeply and I prayed about it as I tried to fall back to sleep and get it out of my mind.  I wasn't too successful, but if I can keep hubby from reading his headlines on his phone to me about it, I can probably push it to the back of my mind and move on.  I cannot change what has happened; no matter how grieved I am at the destruction and the fall of our nation as I grew up in, the best thing I can do is pray about it and leave it to God.  I've read a couple prophets blogs where they have apologized, and repented, for stating the President would be in office for another 4 years.  To say they have been shaken to the core is an understatement.  They still say they believe they heard this from God, but the interpretation they felt they had 'must' have been incorrect, and although they felt they had received confirmation, they are humbled that they were wrong.  They are now withdrawing from public comments so that they can read their Bibles and seek God to better understand what they missed in their interpretation.  I can understand what they feel, although I am no prophet and I don't make any proclamations.  My heart is grieved and I am terrified of what the next four years and beyond will bring.  I seriously am.  I will pray fervently that God will raise up leaders who will lead us, and not destroy us.  Yes, I really truly want to rain fire on some people in Congress, for I truly feel they are evil, but I am reminded that I cannot throw the first stone, and it is not my place to judge their lives, their actions, or their words.  God is still on His throne and He will judge those who have done this evil.  

I love the quietness of this morning as I sit here.  Hubby looks like he is finished with his 'quiet time' over by the desk and is going through his phone.  After I finish this, I will be finished as well, and we will get ready to take a walk.  The sun is shining - it sure rises late now - and although nippy out, it will be refreshing to just MOVE and get fresh air and walk in it.  God has provided us a beautiful day to get out in.  I'll need to google what else is in this immediate area.  Walking would do us both good.

Our fasting days are coming up quickly.  I would like to start tomorrow, but hubby is adamant that we wait until Monday.  I've decided to do the Daniel fast, giving up meats, breads and desserts.  Hubby is mulling that over.  I told him I have no problem cooking meat for him.  He fears giving up protein and I reminded him that we do have protein shakes if needed.  We also have broth from chicken and beef we can drink.  I have a package of bone broth in the refrigerator at home now.  He always connects broth with colonoscopies cause that is what he drinks when he gets one.  But I like broth, personally.  It warms up the body and fills it up as well.  I'm ok with it.  We will be starting the fast within the next couple of days.  Our church is only doing 14 days this time (and then do another week in June), but I'm thinking I may continue through the end of January.  

Sometimes through these fasts God reveals things, and I'm hoping He will again.  Usually it is for me, which is great, because I see areas in which I need to change and grow.  And I'm praying that I will be open to receiving all that He has to say to me.

So for now, I am going to hush and end this and see what our day will begin with.  Hope that you are doing well.  Maybe I can get hubby up earlier tomorrow morning - will see.  My body is so used to waking up at 4AM and getting up, that it doesn't like to lay in bed.

Have a blessed day!