I actually felt so good yesterday - much better than I have felt in a long time. I have come to the realization that, especially this past month, I have been completely burned out - with work, with shopping, with issues, with life. I felt so much better yesterday than I have in a long time - even though I was busy cooking most of the afternoon. Yes, I fixed my BBQ ribs and coleslaw and grabbed a can of black-eyed peas and we went to the daughter's late afternoon for dinner. Had leftovers, even with leaving some ribs with the daughter and granddaughter. I brought a few home for hubby; I'm not interested in ribs right now. Once I cook (and smell them all afternoon), and eat a few, I'm done. What hubby doesn't eat today will go in the freezer; I only brought about 8-10 home, I think.
I started to write about our fasting and remembered the scripture - Matthew 6:16-18 (NIV): When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
So, although you know that hubby and I will be fasting from earlier posts, I will keep silent about what we are fasting; once we figure it out! It is so easy to write about it here, as I seem to open up and share more on here than with anyone else. It's easier to type out my feelings, my confusion, my struggles in here than talk about them. But fasting is a private matter between one and God, our Father. In fact, I usually keep it so private I try to fast and not even let hubby know I'm doing it! I've gotten away from fasting these past years and I really do want to get back into focus. I know things I want to specifically pray for during the fast, and that is important. One fasts without a purpose is only doing without meals. I need to determine for myself what I want to focus on and pray about as I fast. I may share answers to prayers that I've prayed during the fast as they happen, but for now, this is it.
I was awake a bit after 1AM this morning and tossed and turned until 4AM and I finally got up. It may be a struggle to get things done today. Back to work today, but I did manage to get online yesterday and take care of my emails and get a couple meetings scheduled that I was requested to do. Cleaned out the incoming mail, anyway. Chatted with my favorite boss an email or two. Had to tell her I have a 7AM gym training appointment this morning - which isn't a big deal - but I need to cut out about 9AM and head to a funeral so will be out of the office for a few hours. I thought about taking another day off, but there really isn't a reason to. I'll be back working 11:30AM or so and can work until 5PM if I need to, and I also worked a couple hours yesterday so it will make up my time off. Yep - just checked my sleep schedule on my phone - it shows 'awake' from 1AM - 4AM. I may need a nap this afternoon as well!
I was talking with hubby yesterday and trying to explain how much better I feel right now because of having nearly two weeks off work. Even with all the Christmas activities, with them being spaced out, because of my time off, I felt more relaxed and refreshed. He proceeded to tell me his opinion and thoughts - that I should not accept so many speaking engagements, that I need to limit myself, etc. on volunteering.... and I felt my life being sucked away. I explained how I enjoy the speaking engagements; it gets us out with people whom we love and care for, and if I get a chance to volunteer for something, it is because I want to do it, not because I have to..... he finally hushed. You know how I don't like being told what to do. I try to be a submissive wife, but when I'm told I can't do something that I enjoy doing, I kind of rebel. Does that make me a rebel?
It's a new year; and I'm back to work - so you will probably hear me moaning and groaning about work fairly soon. My male boss took the extra days off as I did and I kid you not - I did not have one email from him to get something done. He will probably make up for it today. I've already put in my 'out of office' from 9-12PM today - but will get back on when we get back home.
I took down one tree; have two more to go - and need to determine what to do with the real tree that is sitting outside. It can sit there for awhile yet until I decide, but do need to get these other two trees taken down - probably this weekend. Hubby insists on helping put up; I wonder if he will insist on helping take down. I know he will drive me crazy about having to help carry out to the garage; he always does. And it isn't too bad as he carries from the side. I've noticed that if he carries something in front, that is when he loses his balance and falls. Like yesterday, I would not let him carry the crockpot of ribs; the SIL came out to get them. If he had carried them, based on things in the past, he can go about 10 feet and then he starts leaning forward and down he goes.
The gym training has helped him a lot - and Morgan is working on both of us to keep our core strong. In fact, she had me doing core yesterday at training. I'm not feeling it too much yet - but I know by tonight I will be! That's how I know it's working!
And with that - I need to get off here and get ready to head over to the gym - legs this morning! My appointment is at 7AM; hubby doesn't go until 8AM. He will have to quickly change to go to the funeral with me. It's a friend we've known for years - the husband was admitted to the hospital in November and diagnosed with leukemia. Mid-December he passed away. Shocked us all as we did not know he was sick; we've seen his wife and she never mentioned anything being wrong. So sad, so unexpected.
And that's why we need to be ready to meet Jesus - we never know when He is going to call us Home to be with Him. Are you ready to meet Jesus? Today would be a good time to make that choice!
Blessings!
