Showing posts with label missing my big sister. Show all posts
Showing posts with label missing my big sister. Show all posts

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

I just couldn't.... it was one of those days.

 As I shared yesterday, I took my car in for the oil change - and had the coolant exchanged (whatever that means) as well.  It all came up to $378 - which is actually less than I usually spend when I take my car in for an oil change.  They also call it the 5K Inspection.  Yeah.  Makes it 'sound better' when they give you the price, I guess.  Anyway, in the inspection it showed I needed rear brake pads as they were down to a '4'.  No, at the price of $356 I was not going to have it done there.  But I do need to get them done.  I remember that my oldest son watched a You Tube, I believe, and changed his own on another car he had.  But, I text'd my son-in-law and asked if their mechanic could do it for me for a lot less.  I haven't heard back yet so will follow up in the next day or so for I don't want to put it off.  If he can't, I will call around for prices and then go for it.  But at least I know they are needed fairly soon.  The front brake pads were at a 9 so they were ok for now.  They also said I needed to look at replacing my tires as they were over 5 years old.  Yeah, and?  There is still tread on them and if it is age that is causing them to be replaced, that can wait too.

It was a stressful workday with lots of meetings and things to get done (no, I still haven't done the minutes from last month's board meeting yet).  Throw in having to take my car in, going back to pick up it up, etc. - It was a somewhat hectic day.  So around 4PM I get a text from Gabriel, the salesman at the car dealership, wanting to know when I was going to pick up my car.  I text'd back and said I had picked it up at 3PM and right now I just wasn't ready nor interested in letting go of my car.  I had had a busy day, and I wasn't interested in meeting with him.  He was very nice about it, especially when I commented he could contact me in two months to see if I had any interest.  But right now, I just don't even want to deal with it. Too much stuff going on, I don't need to get rid of my car, I just spent $356 on it - naw, I'll keep it.  I love my blue car.  But I am curious how much he would have offered me for it.  But he didn't say, and I chose not to ask (and be tempted, perhaps?).  I don't want a car payment.  I did tell my 'go to' person at the dealership service area about it and told him that if they want my car so bad, give me a new car, with low mileage, and I'll trade even.  He laughed. So did I.

I was able to make it to my grandson's band concert last night and I enjoyed it a lot.  I enjoyed even more getting to see my oldest son and his wife.  The Jazz band was really good, and it reminded me that I do enjoy Jazz music, although it's been a while since I've listened to it.  Maybe I'll remember and ask Alexa to play some for me today.  I usually listen to Christian music.  Jazz is soothing too.  I loved getting a hug afterwards from my grandson and we made arrangements to pick him up on Thursday to take him out for his birthday dinner.  Told him to pick - and it doesn't matter to us.  

My sister sent me a video of a doctor who talks about water and our need to drink it.  I listened to it on the way back home last night and found it very interesting.  She said we should drink a glass of water about 1/2 hour before a meal - but do not drink liquid with our meal.  I know that sounds strange, but it made sense.  Something about the lining of our stomach and what how the liquid increases the lining before we eat to protect us from ulcers, but if we drink it during our meals, it takes away from what our food is giving us in minerals and vitamins.... or something like that.  I think I want to listen to it again. I finished listening to it before I went to bed.  She shared about a doctor in prison in a foreign country wrote this book called (I think) Your body's many cries for water; you are not sick, you are thirsty.  I went through 12 pages of looking at books with Thirst in them and I think that is the one.  But it's true.  Many times, when we think we are hungry, when we are bored, it is really our body telling us that our body is getting dehydrated, and nothing is going to quench it except water.

Even drinking coffee and tea is not going to quench your thirst - only water can.  A person gets up and has orange juice and coffee first thing in the morning - but it doesn't quench the thirst - they need to drink a cup of water.  This doctor also talked about how diabetes and cancer come in to the body because we don't drink enough water to get certain vitamins and minerals into our pancreas and allow... well, I can't remember it all and don't want to give you the wrong information.  If interested in listening to what she has to say, let me know and I'll send the video to you.  It's about an hour long - and she draws pictures.  But in the book, I mentioned above, the doctor imprisoned said that people would come to him (in the prison) because he was a doctor and he had nothing to give them to make them feel better.  So he would give them a cup of water.  When they came back again, he gave them another cup of water.  So on and so on.  After a couple weeks, people started feeling better; had more energy, were losing weight, and were claiming the doctor healed them.  Hence, the book, telling all about it.  But the bottom line is, our bodies need water.  I think she said a 200-pound person needs to drink at least two quarts of water a day.  It also gets rid of constipation.... hello, anyone?  You don't drink it all at once but start with a cup of water first thing in the morning - before coffee.  (Actually, I do that without knowing this for I take my pills first thing in the morning with water, before I get my coffee).  And I drink water throughout the day.... I've cut way back, but I'm understanding I need to have a certain amount.  I'm willing to give it a shot to keep disease away from me and have more energy.  Anyone else?  It's real interesting how water can heal the body.... to the point one guy who had ulcers, had diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure - within a year or two after purposely drinking water throughout the day and not at meals.... was taken off all medication by his doctor - including the insulin!  

She also talked about how our table salt is not good for us - and the reason we keep adding more and more salt is because it numbs our tastebuds in our mouth to where we can't taste it.  Sea Salt is depleted of minerals.  She suggested Celtic salt, which I've never heard of but am going to check it out.  It is 'hand drawn' from wherever it is and is not mass produced like Sea Salt and table salt is.  Celtic salt is full of minerals that are good for you - 56 of them, I think she said.  But don't quote me!  Anyway, checking it out.

(see how easy it is to ramble about things I read and listen to?  And 'people' wonder how I can come up with so much to write about!)  LOL

Isaiah 25:1 (NKJV):  O Lord, You are my God. I will exalt you, I will praise Your name, for You have done wonderful things; Your counsels of old are faithfulness and truth.

Have you ever thought about all the things that God has done for you?  For many of us, He has healed us.  He has given us life, and even NEW life in Him.  He provides for us.  He meets our needs.  He loves us unconditionally and will always be FOR us.  He is always faithful and true.  He may not always give us our heart's desire, but He always gives us what we need.  I know that for a fact!  I have not received all the things I have prayed for over the years, some prayers intense, some prayers demanding, some prayers timid and unsure.... and He always answered.  I didn't always LIKE the answers I received.  But one thing in my devotions that I read this morning came to mind....

Did I pause to thank God for the non-answers as well as the answers to prayer?  Oftentimes we will get an immediate answer to our prayers, and we say, 'Thank You, God!' immediately!  And mean it.  But sometimes we don't get the answer we want, and we just feel disappointed and go on our way.  An example that comes to my mind is my older sister.  I miss her so much.  When things happened that was taking her life away, I prayed intensely for healing, for life, for her.  I put all my faith out there and I truly believed that God was going to do a miracle and bring her back to life.  Granted, someone drinking antifreeze is usually 'dead' within a few hours.  But they had her on life support for three days while the situation was investigated, and I prayed that God would restore her life in her.  I believed.  But it didn't happen, and the plug was pulled.  Why didn't God answer my prayers for her?  I don't know.  But He is God, and I am not.  Could it be that if He had brought her back to life, that her life would still be as miserable as she was before?  Yes, I even prayed that the antifreeze would take away the arthritis.... crazy prayers... I wanted my sister alive, and I was willing to pray any kind of prayer to get her back.  But God said NO.  And I realize that I never thanked Him for His 'NO' answer.  Why should I thank Him?  Because when my sister was alive, she did not have any quality of life to speak of. She had a son who treated her shamefully and a daughter who had nothing to do with her, a granddaughter who disowned her.  Her one grandson loved her and took time to visit with her when he was in town, and called her on occasion, but still, it wasn't often.  My sister allowed arthritis to take over her life and used it as an excuse to live in bed, rarely getting up and even more rare, going out of her apartment.  Even on my last trip to Indiana I only saw her once - when our brother picked her up and brought her to dinner.  I tried twice to go visit, and both times she told me no.  She always had an excuse.  So, Father, I thank You for Your 'NO' answer to keep her alive.  You knew what her future would be like if she had lived.  It wasn't good.  I miss her. A lot.  But I have to trust You for the answer You gave me.  

God is always faithful, even when we don't understand the why.

Oh my - I have really rambled on this morning, haven't I! And, since I have, I will hush.  Hope that you have an amazing day!

Blessings!


Wednesday, June 21, 2023

A nice quiet evening......alone.

 The daughter had other things to do last night so we didn't meet up for 'girls night out'.  Hubby went ahead (thank goodness!) to his meeting with his friend.  So glad.  I popped a burger in the microwave and had it and fruit for dinner.  Once hubby left, I decided I wanted to watch movies..... alone.  So I did.  They were a couple we had seen before, and one was even a Christmas movie, but I enjoyed them.  Hubby came home right at the end of the 2nd one.  Then, of course, I had to explain what I had watched.  But I also worked on a crochet piece and so was able to do two things 'at once'.    I enjoyed the quiet evening.

Did I tell you my big brother sent me a surprise the other day?  He said he had one and it made him happy to sit back and watch it- and thought it would bring me enjoyment as well.  And it does.  He sent me a fountain.  I moved some things around and it is sitting on the table under the mirror by the door.  When I plug it in, it lights up and the water flows.  It's really comforting and peaceful... and yeah, it makes me happy.  It IS a little loud in the house, but unfortunately, we only have one plug outside and unless we are going to be sitting outside for awhile, no sense in letting it set out in the sun.  It's plastic, after all.  But it is nice and I do enjoy it.

I got another surprise this morning when I was reading an author friend's blog.  She often interviews other authors and then gives away a signed copy of their book.... and as I was reading - MY name was selected!  Whoo hoo!  I probably ought to go back and read more about this author from that blog, but I will be getting her book soon.  Nice!

I've worked it out with my trainer that I (and hubby) will be getting hour long training sessions for the next 3-4 weeks.  I will make a decision then if I want to continue them or go back to 30 minutes.  Once I get my routine down and know the equipment, I can do it on my own, but for now, I do enjoy someone showing me the ropes and pushing me to lift just a little bit more.  

I met with the doctor yesterday re my colonoscopy that I am due for.  Sigh.  I hate those things.  Yes, I used the 'h' word.  I am scheduled for July 21 @ 8:30AM and need to be there by 7:30AM... so more than likely, I will not be sharing anything that day.  Unless I do it later.  But, since I also know I will be 'up' all night.... I will probably come home and sleep.... and screw up my sleeping schedule for a few days.  Oh well.  I originally had it scheduled just before the wedding we have next month... but in reading some of hte paperwork, it said if polyps were removed, you were asked not to go out of town for 7-10 days in case something happened.... that shouldn't.... Now I've had them removed before without consequences... but this is a new doctor doing it... and although I don't believe anything will go wrong... with the wedding that weekend after, I decided to move it out to after the wedding.  Now I have that to look forward to for a longer time.  sigh.  Getting 'er done!

Psalm 91:1 (NKJV):  "He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty."

I love Psalm 91 and have often prayed it over my family and even over myself.  I love being in the 'secret place' and spending time with my Heavenly Father.  My Abba.  When I am with Him, I am content.  

Do you remember being with someone who just made you feel 'safe' and 'secure'?  Perhaps when you were a child, you were in a place where you just felt comforted and at peace with the person you were with.  Perhaps it was your dad, or your mom, or maybe even a sibling who looked after you.  You knew that no matter what came against you, they would be there to protect you, to shield you.   Most of us wives feel we have a hubby who will protect us if something should happen.... but I do know of at least one who says that if someone broke in to her house, her hubby would go hide and she would be the one to rescue them.  One really doesn't know, does one, until that time happens.  LOL  I was just sitting here thinking about my hubby.  He is SO over-protective of me.... but if someone came against me, he would step in between us, I am confident of that.  But then I thought... he can't hear when he has his hearing aids out... and I've tried to awaken him at night and he would certainly alert whoever broke in with his "What?  What?  What's happening?" loudly spoken before it would sink in I needed him to check something.  I've learned that sometimes it is easier to just get up and investigate myself, say a prayer of protection, and then go back to bed when I see it's nothing.  Another reason I would like a small dog at some point.  They would alert to any thing happening.  I miss my Sheeba and my Marley.... big dogs.  Both very protective.  Some day I can have what I want.  God willing.

I find in my troubled times I can go in to my 'secret place' and just lay it all out before Him and then entrust my issues to the Lord.  He listens and He makes the decision on if and when to act.  Many times, way too many, I'm sure... I want Him to act NOW and do it MY way... but He has proven to me time and again that His way is always best.

I don't always get what I ask for.  And sometimes what I ask for, I do get... but it is in HIS timeframe, not mine.  Things that I asked for years ago... may come to fruitation this year.  It's all in His hands, and I choose to trust Him for His timing.  Some things I have asked for over the years are no longer valid.  And some things I keep praying for and waiting on His timing.

The past few days I have been missing my big sister.... I realized last night that it has now been a year since she passed away.  I still remember it all.  I truly believed God would hear my prayers for her and would restore and heal her.  But He didn't.  I think it was June 18th that she was 'officially' gone.  I'd have to go look at my calendar.  It does't matter.  She's gone.  And I miss her.  We did have some good laughs.  I'm so glad I called her the day before and we chatted.  So many things about the character of my siblings has been revealed this past year as well.  Both have been disappointing.  But.  I am not going to dwell on those things.  I'm just going to love them.  They are accountable for their own actions. I am accountable for mine.  So my little sister keeps reminding me... I just shake my head when I receive another video via messenger from her that is about "we all will give an account of the life we live'.  

Gonna go to Refuel tonight - which is our church's prayer meeting.  And that's all we do - we pray.  I still have difficulty when some of them pray - black people pray really, really loud.  On a microphone.  I just don't feel it is necessary.  But that is the way they pray.  I'm thinking He hears me when I whisper my prayers. No, I haven't prayed in front of the others with the microphone; they designate 4-5 people to pray... I have not 'thrown' my name in the hat.  I just pray at my seat for the church, for prayer requests, for my family.   We definitely are a praying church..... it's just hard for us to get past the 'screaming' of some.  It's a turn off, sometimes.   But everyone prays differntly.  I've just learned to pray like I'm having a conversation with my Heavenly Father.  I don't have to scream at Him to get His attention.  He hears me.  

And with that, I'm hushing for today.  It's Wednesday and it's going to be a blessed day!  Take some time to 'dwell in His secret place'.

Blessings!