Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Half over..... really?

Is today being the 30th of June really the middle of the year? I don't know - and what's more, I'm not going to look it up. June 30th. Wow. Do you know how much I need to do in order to prepare for Christmas? Wow. I have so much to do!! Yes, I've made a start, but haven't gotten much further than the start.

We had a wonderful storm during the night. I guess it started late evening - and I don't know when it woke me up - but I remember waking up with thunder and rain going on pretty good. I love to sleep in rainy weather - so drifted right back off to sleep. Then this morning I thought I dreamt it so I got up and looked outside to see!

wow. I think today is going to be a good day. Why? I just stopped writing to head to the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee..... and a coworker was in there..... and she commented... "It looks like you are losing weight!" In fact, I checked this morning and I have lost 5 pounds!! Whoo Hoo!! It's actually noticeable!! Now THAT made my day!! What I'm doing is paying off!

But I guess I should confess, since I put it in my last post that I had joined WW..... I cancelled it yesterday. Why? Different reasons. It's difficult for me to get home in time for a meeting (last week I was able to leave work early because my boss was gone)... and I have the 'plan program' so can do it on my own..... you don't have to go to a meeting for it to work.... and I don't have the $52 a month to let them have. A friend has also shared a book with me in which she has lost 25 pounds since October..... she thought perhaps I could incorporate it with my WW. And I think I can.

This book is the Right Type for your Blood Type. I'm an A. And it really isn't a diet book.... it's a get your body healthy type book - losing weight would be a side effect. I'm for that. I've discovered that as a Type A, that I shouldn't eat beef, or pork..... which made me laugh.... because for the past several months I haven't wanted any beef... and the only pork I was really interested in eating was bacon. For my blood type, I need to eat more fruits and vegetables....which I try to. I enjoy a good salad. I enjoy fruit.

July lst......

Yep - never got back to the above yesterday. And here it is July lst. Where has the time gone? I look back over the first six months and don't see anything great that I've accomplished - well, I did get started on one Christmas gift, but that's about it.

Today we are having our July 4th "celebration" here at work - dessert contest and Joe's BBQ bringing food in around 11:30am. We eat good in my company. Sigh. Very good. We've had breakfast and lunch catered for the last two days - and yet today - and a lunch tomorrow. Yeah, all for meetings that I'm not in - but I go and get food. :-) So, I have eaten well - and I've even left the bacon alone. And I don't feel deprived for doing it. If I really want it - I'll eat it. Today we had turkey sausage and it was good too. Anyway - I'm making a 'fruit pizza' for the contest, and I've also made a fruit trifle. Let's see which one wins! Would be cool if I won two gift cards! I sometimes give them away when I do win cause I don't like where they are for. I don't do P.F. Chang, and Lucille's BBQ is in Tempe so won't go there... and a few others. I did win a Chipolte one time - and we used it for dinner that night! Lately they have been giving away $50 gift cards - would be nice to win!

Well, I am at work and I do need to work - so guess I'd better get at it. I was awake most of the night with leg cramps - hope I can make it through the day.


Thursday, June 25, 2015

Well, I finally said 'enough'!

I did. I'm so tired of trying on clothes that are too tight, and no longer fit. I realized a long time ago that one shouldn't go by sizes when out buying clothes - you can buy the same brand, same style, and at the same store - and when you get the item(s) home - every one fits a bit differently. The only item I have ever found that fit me about the same, and that I was happy with, was my Riders brand pants. I can wear their jeans, I can wear their slacks - and in the same size. My gripe with them now - or perhaps it is with the stores that sell Riders pants - is that they no longer sell the different color slacks. They are casual, yet dressy, and I have been wearing them to work for years. Now I can't find them so have had to purchase other brands that don't fit well, I'm not comfortable in, and spend a lot more for. And wear less. My Riders slacks are probably about 5 years old so I know I need to replace, but even with buying several pairs of dress slacks this past year, I'm not happy with anything but my Riders brand. My jeans are fading out too and they are probably about 5 years old. Need to start looking around again, I guess.

But I got off track. That wasn't what I was going to talk about. What did I finally say 'enough'! about? My size, for one. My weight, for another. Work feeds me well. By that I mean that we seem to constantly have meetings that have food catered in. And I must admit, I do order good meals. Did I ever tell you about the Argentina style flank steak I ordered from Nibblers last month..... it was so good..... but again, I'm distracted. We always have good food, sandwiches, salads, soups, and always, always, always, cookies and brownies - whether from Paradise Bakery, Jason's Deli, Nibblers..... and so many other places. Not to mention pizza, or really, really good philly cheesesteak sandwiches from a little shop called 'Bite me'. See what I mean?

And I'm helpless. I LOVE food. and I especially love GOOD food. And food I don't have to cook - all I have to do is eat it. And I do. And I have. Ok - gotta go meet with someone to order food for next week. Back in a minute. (yes, I'm at work).

Ok, I'm back.

Oh, the food I have ordered for next week - I had to make sure that at least for lunch I will have salad. I've ordered a hot breakfast for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday..... hot meaning from a place called Crackers and another place called Chompies - which means biscuits, gravy, breakfast sandwiches, French toast, eggs, bacon, sausage.... yeah.... all that good stuff. Man, I'm hungry! I've also ordered lunches for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.... sandwiches, salads, and hot pastas. See why I am getting so fat? And I haven't mentioned that Zupas dips half their cookies in dark chocolate... and soooo good.

But getting to where I have said 'enough' - I joined weight watchers last Monday. Yes, I know, I shouldn't tell it, and just see if anyone notices over time, but now I've 'spit it out' there. Maybe by telling it, it will make me stick to it. Definitely costs enough, but I need something to motivate me to start watching my eating. I love chips. I love cookies. I love food. I have got to get control. My clothes don't fit. And it's time.

What about you? Have you reached a point about something in your life that you have finally just said 'enough'!? Is it spending too much? Is it going out too much? Is it shopping too much? Is it eating too much? As you stop to reflect - is there something you need to cut back on? Not necessarily give it up, mind you, but cut back on?

One thing I never want to cut back on is my loving God. He is my strength, my hope, and my very life. Without Him, without His intervention in my life, I would be nothing. I owe Him everything - all that I am and all that I have, is because of Him. And His love for me never fails. He forgives me daily. I am lost without Him guiding and encouraging and directing my life.

He will do that for you too. Just ask Him.


Tuesday, June 16, 2015

You can't have it all.....

Yep. I read a few paragraphs today in a leadership book that made that statement as its heading. You can't have it all. Well, why not? If I can get it, achieve it, want it, desire it, have it...... it's mine, right? But.... do you/I really NEED it....

I'm a pack rat. I admit it. I inherited that trait from my mother. I'm not near as bad as my mother, but still, I do tend to hang on to things that I need to let go of. I still have boxes in my closet that when I cleaned out a desk years ago I didn't have time to go through all that 'stuff' is still in the box. Occasionally I open the box... flip through it.... may take out a paper or item or two.... then put the lid back on it - and back in the closet it goes.

I have gotten better over the years.... and if I ever had several days alone where I could work without interruption, I know that I could get rid of a lot of "stuff". As I hear someone say "I would like to have "... and I have it.... and am willing to let it go.... I give to them. Unfortunately, we haven't had anyone say anything for awhile so I need to start taking to Savers or someplace.

But to take it a bit further.... how many of us have 'things' in our lives that we tend to hang on to and not let go of? Things like anger, hurt, frustration, laziness, anxiety..... then to the other extreme.... pushiness, arrogance, attitude.... I think even in the few things I've mentioned, we can find some form of a word in our lives. So the question then becomes.... is that 'word' something we want to be known by.... is that 'word' a word that we are proud to own....

I don't like being a packrat. I've said numerous times how the clutter in my house drives me crazy sometimes... but when I try to eliminate it, I sometimes get resistance so quit. Or I need to hang on to something and there is no other place to put it. I've often said that if I had a month to myself, the first week I'd 'play' - then I would start elminating things and cleaning house. Would that really happen? I don't know, but you have to admit, it does sound good.

The story in the book is about a mountain climber. The guide told him that he could only take the bare necessities with him to make the climb. The mountain climber felt he could take anything he wanted - so the next morning showed up with a blanket, several cameras with different lenses, a bottle of wine, cheese, chocolate bars... and he was so confident he could make it to the top with all that "stuff" that he took off ahead of everyone on the climb.

It didn't take long before the rest of the group began to see things discarded along the trail. A blanket. A camera here and there. A bottle of wine. Pieces of cheese. Chocolate bars. And when the rest of the group got to the top of the mountain, they found the mountain climber with the bare necessities standing at the top. He learned that to get to the top, he had to let go of 'things' that were not needed.

What about you? Are you carrying baggage with you in your backpack that you can discard?


Thursday, June 11, 2015

Just Miscellaneous Babble.....

It's been a busy week here at work - sort of. Boss is gone today to Tucson to have a meeting there, but will be back tomorrow in the office. One of these times I get to go with her - just haven't worked it out yet. I probably could have gone today cause she didn't leave until this morning - but usually she rents a car and goes down the night before. Oh well - didn't think about it. Besides, I have plenty of work to get done.

I've done fairly well on watching what I eat. I say 'fairly well', for I know I have 'cheated' on occasion.... but I do want you to know that it is one of the coworkers birthday.... and another coworker brought in a homemade cheesecake. She makes them sooooo good. And I turned it down. Yep. Cheesecake isn't my favorite, but she really, really does make an awesome cheesecake and I've had it before..... but I said no this time. Sigh.

Got "approved" for covered parking - across the street. We got kicked out the covered parking we were told we could park..... seems another company bought it and didn't want to share with the three of us who parked there. So Corporate managed to get 90 spaces - 75 covered and the remaining uncovered - across the street. I'm not sure exactly where it is located, but should find out soon. The notice came out today that we will be assigned badges and they will be coming out soon. Plus, the executive management (which includes my boss) who park in the covered parking in our garage here, are now allowed to have a 'back-up' parking badge for those days they are out of the office - they can share their spot. And of course my boss said that I get the spot when she isn't here. In fact, I could go out and move my car into her spot cause she is out today, but it's too much effort. I'm going home in a few hours anyway. But in another week she will be gone a whole week - but I am also taking three days off that same week - so will get to park there two days.

Yeah, I've got three days scheduled off this month - and I'm hoping they will be productive. My Aunt Sue needs to have a yard sale and get rid of Aunt Mae's clothes and things. She is just overwhelmed with what to do - so I'm taking off work to help her sort through things and help with the sale. I went last Saturday and spent the day with her and went through things and helped clean. I was to get Aunt Mae's wedding ring.... but all her rings are no where to be found..... well, one that is costume jewelry is in the drawer - but all her good rings are gone. Aunt Sue seems to think the caregivers helped themselves. I hope not. I want that wedding ring.... maybe we will come across it as we go through Aunt Mae's things. I'm going over again this Saturday to balance checkbook and help get started on things for the yard sale - which will be in two more weekends. I told Aunt Sue let's just put out what we can to get some room - then we can have another one later in the summer to let go of other things.

Aunt Sue is so sweet. When I left last Saturday, she hugged me and said, "Don't you let anyone tell you that you are not my niece!" I've been her niece for 30+ years - well, adopted, but still... she claims me! She does have one 'real' niece who lives in town.... but I kind of get the impression that with Aunt Sue's stubbornness - they don't get along real well. Works for me- Aunt Sue loves me cause I let HER make the decisions - but I give her the options to choose from so it makes her still be in control. I've been calling periodically to make sure she is drinking her water and taking care of herself. Last Friday she ended up in the hospital dehydrated. So now I tell her she has to drink a bottle of water in the morning, and another one in the afternoon. She tells me she's doing it. She is so much fun to be around.

Well, this is just babble and I need to get busy with things. I'm so fortunate I have had someone like Aunt Sue and Aunt Mae in my life. Actually, all four of the sisters have been a blessing to me - but now we are just down to Aunt Sue. They are amazing. Aunt Mae's last trip to Barbados to help on a work camp - she was 96 years old. I want to be that active when I get that old. I don't care so much about traveling everywhere, but hope to be doing things.

God has been good to me and has given me blessings of people to walk this journey of life with. I'm glad 'the sisters' have been a part of mine.


Monday, June 8, 2015

It's a new week - new resolve....

Last week was a good week. I can't always say that, but overall, it was a good week. Yes, sigh, I did overeat - or rather, eat things I shouldn't have - because of going out to dinner 3 nights, then had big lunches here at work and a potluck breakfast on Friday..... yesterday we took a drive up north - at which dear friends gave me a package of Oreos because they love me - and I went to lunch and I went to dinner. Lunch was a salad and was very good - but dinner....sigh.... went to Culvers. And those of you who know about Culvers, there is NOTHING good that comes out of that place. (who wants to order a salad at Culvers?)

Overall, it was a good week. I enjoyed being with those I love and care for. Saturday I got to spend the day with my adopted aunt and help her clean house and work on her checking account. She fixed us chicken salad for lunch - as only older people can and will. I hope I never fix chicken salad like this. LOL When I make chicken salad (with chicken from a can), I shred the chicken, add miracle whip (which makes it best) and some grapes, some walnuts.... things to give it texture and flavor. My dear aunt cut the chicken pieces into tiny, tiny pieces. Then she added the following flavorings..... lemon pepper (or was it lemon garlic?), dill, parsley.... and finished it up with mayonnaise. Oh my word. She gave me about a cup of it for lunch, along with some crackers. I had to nearly force myself to eat it as the seasons were so strong. I ate a lot of crackers with it and a full glass of water! I would never hurt her feelings for the world, but I sure hope she never makes that for me again. I could easily lose weight eating that stuff. Some people like all that spice - I don't. Otherwise..... it could have been good....

Yesterday we visited our friends up north and because Marley got a vacation from us as well, we were able to stay a little longer. Hubby will be picking Marley up from the pet hotel before noon today. It was a good day too. We enjoyed seeing our friends at church, my girlfriend and I got to have lunch alone at our favorite salad place - Wildflower - and tried a new salad that was very, very good. After a leisurely lunch we headed to the house to meet up with the guys and play games in the afternoon. Come dinner time the boys were wanting to eat so off we went to Culvers. Bad move.... but the burger was good. Did you know that the kids meal burger is the same size as their regular burger? AND you get a small fry and drink AND a cup of icecream with one topping. I used Butterfinger. Yum. Yeah, I was not good.

But, today is a new day and I am behaving myself. I brought my oreos into work to share - far away from me. I had a protein shake for breakfast. Not sure what I will have for lunch - I do have protein shakes in my drawer to make if I am so inclined - plus I have a small blender I keep under my desk. I'm set, I think. And, as I was making coffee here at work, the TV was on, and the 21 day Fix was being shown. Yeah, it is a video/weight loss thing - I must admit I was really tempted. I need motivation, and I'm almost willing to do anything to get motivated. I wish I had someone who would want to exercise with me.

I decided against ordering it. I know that as I pray and lean into God, He will enable me to get past the temptations and help me to eat the way I should. He is far more powerful than any TV fix. Or 21 day fix. I can do this - with His help.

Time to get my workday started - hope you have a blessed day!


Wednesday, June 3, 2015

And I wonder why I can't lose weight????

I am my own worst enemy when it comes to losing weight. Maybe I just need to change my focus. I keep saying I want to 'run' - so why don't I? Well, finding time that works for me, is a tough one. But, with that aside, I surely can find some time to do SOMEthing......

This week is one of FOOD. I just can not say 'no' when it comes to food. Especially GOOD food and GOOD desserts. Sigh. Monday night I made cookies for the men's group hubby has on Tuesdays. Yes, I ate a couple of them. or Four. Tuesday at lunch we had a meeting - a lunch meeting - and we had Mexican food from Garcia's. Do I need to say anything more? I did stay out of that dessert. However, one of our directors made home made peanut butter cookies with chocolate chips - which were absolutely delicious. I think I ate 3 before I told myself no more! And these were big and thick. I wasn't hungry. I just couldn't say no to my food addiction.

Then last night I was blessed to have some 1:1 time with my recently married beautiful Princess. We haven't had time together for a long, long time. And we had a lot of fun. Great dinner at Paradise Bakery - then we had a little time to walk around the Brass Armadillo. It's an antique place that is so fun to walk through. My daughter calls it an 'old people's yard sale'..... she just doesn't love antiques like I do. We had fun, then it was time to take her home. It was a good night.

Today we have a lunch meeting and it is going to be Flank Steak and all that will go with it. Tonight I am meeting a dear aunt for dinner. So that takes care of meals for today. And then no lunch scheduled for Thursday, but Thursday evening I am meeting another Princess at a favorite Mexican restaurant to celebrate her 19th birthday.

Like I said - and I wonder why I can't lose weight!! At least in looking ahead on the calendar, I don't have a lunch here at work until a week from Friday. Thank goodness!! We do tend to eat good here.

I need to start running. I need to do SOMETHING. I need to quit eating so much of the wrong food - or just eat a lot less of everything. But it all tastes so good!!

I have a food addiction!! YIPES!

But I can beat this. I've done it before. I can do it again. I just have to get my mind set on what I want to do - and prepare for it. It is in mental preparation, as it is in food preparation. I buy a lot of vegetables, but they usually rot in the fridge ... for various reasons I won't go in to. So I quit buying them. I need to buy just enough for a couple days and then bring them to work to always have lunch. Most days I work straight through lunch - and munch while I'm working. Anything and everything. And the people I work with are so kind - when THEY have a meeting, they always fix me a plate and bring to me. sigh.

Any addiction can get the best of you if you let it. But I am determined that I can beat my food addiction. With God's help, of course. It won't be easy, for I love food - a lot - but it will be for my benefit and my health. I can do this.

Stay tuned. I'll try to hold myself accountable. Starting today. Counting calories. Starting right now. Going to walk more. Starting Saturday (hey - I can't do it all immediately!!)

What do you need to change in your life? You won't be doing it alone. Join the fight! Beat that addiction! Go God!!


Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Short Week Syndrome?

I have an extremely short week this week.... which isn't exactly a bad thing. Yesterday we were off work because of Memorial Day. Yes, I took time to think of why we even had this "holiday" off work. Today I am at work. Tomorrow I am taking a personal day to attend my adopted aunt's funeral. Thursday I will be working, and Friday I am taking a vacation day to attend a granddaughter's high school graduation. Next week will be a bear, having to come into work every day!! No more vacation days (currently) scheduled until August, for our anniversary, although I doubt if we can afford to go anywhere. But that's ok - it doesn't bother me to stay at home. Other than the fact I tend to not do anything.

I did attempt to clean out a closet this weekend. Actually, I finally got around to it yesterday morning. I was gungho on getting it accomplished and did get through a lot of it. I pulled out several boxes, yes boxes, of papers I had stashed - and I'm not sure what all of it is. I saw some bank statements, etc, but I know that isn't all of it. My thought was to sit down and start going through this paperwork and throw it away and try to organize it some.

Within a very short time I was interrupted several times with questions/comments - and then a phone call came from our daughter inviting us up for a lunch cookout. We did that and played a game with them before heading back home. Then I just couldn't get back to it. The boxes are back in the closet where they came from and the few tops I am discarding are sitting in a stack. Not a very productive weekend - at least not what I had planned. Not that the going to lunch was a big interruption - it was a welcome respite - but I guess I waited too long... but knowing me, and knowing the cirucmstances..... even if I had started Saturday it wouldn't have gotten much further. I need to be totally alone when I am in the mood to clean so that I can focus and get it done.

But then, when I am totally alone, who wants to clean? That's ME time!!

I saw a video on facebook yesterday that I really liked. And yes, it involved cleaning out closets, etc. It said to put all your clothes in a pile on your bed. Then one by one, take that item and ask yourself if that item brings you 'joy'. Meaning, when you wear it, does it feel good on you (does it still fit?!!), do you feel good in it. If it doesn't, then let it go. (I actually have several of those items I just haven't let go of because even if it doesn't 'feel good', I just might need to wear it as a last resort) I have several things I won't wear because they just aren't comfortable. Another thing they mentioned was instead of folding and stacking tops in a drawer (and always grabbing the top one or two), fold them and place them upright side by side - that way you can see what is at the 'bottom' of the stack. That made sense too. One more thing they mentioned was socks. That part was interesting. I have lots of socks for in the wintertime with my boots I love to wear different kinds of decorative socks. Some I need to get rid of cause my big toe has found the way through the end, but if I darn them, I can still wear them.... but they are so thin from years of use, one would think I would pay the $2 and buy a new pair. Anyway. they suggested to roll the socks and stack them side by side. Me, I grab a pair that matches and turn them inside out 1/2 way and throw in the drawer. My drawer looks like a jumbled mess.

Someone said once that the way our house looks - is also a reflection of how our lives look. And, in retrospect, I can see that. My house is fairly clean, but my closets and my two back rooms I have declared 'mine' - are extremely messy. Sort of like how my life is. I look neat and put together on the outside, but inside I feel like a jumbled mess most of the time. I want to straighten out my closets and clean my rooms, but I feel I get conflict every time I try to. I want to clean my life up, and make the inside as neat as the outside, and I feel I get conflict. Is this where I say, 'woe is me'?

No. This is where I decide who is in control. And it ain't me. And it ain't my hubby. God is. I need to clean my house for Him. I need to overcome the obstacles I face inside and outside, to clean and give it to him. It's hard to have my quiet time when I feel cluttered - inside and outside. I think it's time to spring clean.

What about you? Time to get up off your butt and do something in your area of messiness? What is hiding in your closet? What is hiding in your heart?

It's still springtime - let's clean!